It's going to turn out the mall princess is the real villain hiding behind a giant mental projection and the capsule contains an adorable Yoshi-like lizard here to save the world #Monsterdon #ZarkorrTheInvader
#ZarkorrTheInvader1996
I THINK AFTER A WHILE YOU GET USED TO THE YELL-ACTING. #MONSTERDON
@Lazarou I donβt see the problem.
hahaha I can hear she can't even keep a straight face while giving the fake government department an address
Who needs a badge when you can just harangue people for a couple minutes?
#Monsterdon #ZarkorrTheInvader
I feel like I should be playing a 1996 videogame with this music
This is my new audition monologue #Monsterdon
Cop dialogue checks out.
Oh, Christ, a protoMAGA
#Monsterdon
@trixter You're a woman, you can't be a doctor!
βWhere to now?β The monsterβ #Monsterdon
Gee, sinister Tommy. I lke stupid Tommy a little bit more.
#monsterdon
#zarkorr1996
RAWWWR!
@raederle itβs not quite up to The Room level of competent incompetence and itβs just a little too aware of how bad it is. It could almost be charming (itβs not) #Monsterdon
Doctor
Doctor
Doctor
A sphere? No, it's an οΌ―οΌ²οΌ’
#Monsterdon π½πΎπ¦π§ββοΈπ₯π«£ π±
Zarkorr! we have been missing you, giant fiery fren
This thing just ain't natural. Just like my pappy said about eyeglasses and rock music.
#monsterdon
#monsterdon Oh, you can't argue about exploding it when you morons arc-welded it.
I wonder what the monster is up to
Have you tried righty tighty lefty loosey?
#Monsterdon #Zarkorr
I bet thereβs some amazing kaiju smashing happening just offscreen
Finally some model destruction. Blessed relief. #monsterdon
(over actors)
#Monsterdon
"This is a diamond ... watch" Actually that's a ring #Monsterdon
Movie: "Remember that show the X-Files and that movie Men In Black and that Deus Ex vidja game? Weren't they great pieces of contemporary media? Now consider: this film! Huh? Huh??" #Monsterdon #ZarkorrTheInvader
#ZarkorrTheInvader1996
Flashing back to that Mr. Show sketch where Bob Odenkirk says acting is just stomping around and shouting the loudest
Okay, this is getting so bad I'm laughing at it now!
If this monster gets taken out by the power of love, the Owlbear is gonna fuckin'
(β―Β°β‘Β°οΌβ―οΈ΅β»ββ»
#Monsterdon π½οΈπΎπ¦π§ββοΈπ₯π«£ π±
Goddamn Question Asker!
Is that the UFO from another movie? It looks like the UFO from another movie.
A hole of unknown origin #Monsterdon
Someone got some inspiration from A Few Good Men in their speech. #monsterdon
You know what's lacking in this creature feature? The Creature! #Monsterdon
to penetrate it? HAve you tried talking gently?
#monsterdon
#zarkorr1996
The Sheriff's constipated yokel accent is killing me. π #Monsterdon
@Bluedepth ...?tetched? and special? #ChecksNotes #monsterdon
I AM holding my breath. Maybe that way I'll black out and not have to experience the rest of this film!
Who did you buy this "diamond"? I've got bad news, bud.
Doctor, Doctor. Doctor, Doctor.
Doctor, Sheriff. #Monsterdon
Couple of days? How long is this movie supposed to be going on?
By hacking the internet we discovered we need to go to Arizona because the off switch that we think exists is probably there, and hackerman buys us a plane ticket then vanishes from the movie
We disguised ourselves as government agents to interact with the native Arizonans, who send a delegation of one cop, one lumberjack who is a geologist and one cook to negotiate.
OH GODS MORE PENETRATION
Good thing it fits in the trunk of our Ford Taurus!
#Monsterdon π½πΎπ¦π§ββοΈπ₯π«£ π±
I'm counting Newark NJ fancy scientist --> Yuma Arizona's folksy sheriff a 'clash of cultures' for bingo purposes
MIB prequel?
#Monsterdon #Zarkorr
#monsterdon "Holy Christ! The whole town is gone!"
[footage of normal infrastructure visible from a normal highway]
Thatβs a fugazi!
Sir, sir, this is Arizona not Alabama
@eigen @cocaine_owlbear Cybernut is more appropriate imho! #monsterdon
what the fuck is this agent on
Did I fall asleep? Is this a different movie? #Monsterdon
Here come the men in black? I guess?!
We were off to such a solid start. Why no more stomp?
My GPS device is more hackery. #Monsterdon #ZarkorrTheInvader
The plane trip should have been an animation over a map with red dashes and dots.
#Monsterdon π½πΎπ¦π§ββοΈπ₯π«£ π±
You can tell he owns the diner because he's wearing a chef's hat
He's a horrible human but a passable travel agent. Who knew? #Monsterdon
They sure got their money's worth on that one sound stage. #monsterdon #Zarkorr1996
That sheriff has to be a bingo for SOMEONE #monsterdon
I just kind of need everyone in this movie to shut up
@north dress up for the desert itβs a California thing #Monsterdon
Doctorβ¦doctorβ¦doctorβ¦Doctor! #monsterdon
I was just wondering why she wasn't making a run for it, when she let it slip that she's become invested in the problem.
I swear I only looked away for a second and it's now Men In Black?
heaven's gate disciple future inductee
#Monsterdon
This movie better end with Tommy failing, on the grounds he got a creepy weird hacker to figure everything out for him, and thus the "world's most average man" didn't prove anything at all?
Yuma, that's where *two* better movies have been set I think
Please tell me that's the last we see of the hacker in this film. Please let him be gone. #monsterdon
They're disguised as the board of directors?
Realizing that I can't tell the difference between a DC-8, MD-80, B717, and a bunch of embrarers
uhh, GPS
fancy, for 1996
#monsterdon
#zarkorr1996
@jonny nyope
WHY ARE WE STILL IN THIS SCENE
Mount Aurora?
In Aurora County?
Near Aurora Valley?
#monsterdon
Now theyβre MiB?
So far, Arthur is the one carrying the entire movie.
Or right, there's a cop here.
So that's to say that Zarkorr is currently "On"?
Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
@jivens@beige.party The writing is so bad this genuinely might work. #Monsterdon #ZarkorrTheInvader
Zarkorr please just go ahead and step on these guys #monsterdon
honestly, do fingerless gloves ever really go out of style?
*hackerman activated*
#Monsterdon #Zarkorr
"We may have found something."
This would actually be a pretty fun D&D game #Monsterdon
the only seismic activity in this scene is my colossal lack of interest in computer guy. it's like Eddie Deezen levels of Please Get This Man Off My Screen.
#monsterdon I understand why the rich kid ran over this guy with a scooter.
@crowbriarhexe Everything got so much worse when being a tech nerd got normalized.
Yβall, thereβs a making of for this thing.
Maybe the off switch is him
Ha! Arthur just said "Say no more!" π
as horrible as he is, there's _almost_ a really good character with this guy
not a _likeable_ character, but an interesting one
There's an off switch on my TV
Movie, are you sure you want to remind me of that?
I swear, this is someone who made a really great amateur miniature monster movie effects reel and found the worst group to shop it to to put it in a movie