So busy burning ladies they missed the vampires. #monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Why am I rooting for the dissolute nobleman?

#monsterdon

Kilometers in the probably-1600s? Wikipedia time!

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

I just think somebody would be a little more raisined if their fluids got slurped out. #monsterdon

This guy is Richard Dawkins' ancestor #monsterdon

The damned Queens park rangers again! #iMayBeAbot #MonsterDon

Oh shit, they brought out the dry ice, things are getting SPOOKY #Monsterdon

No likable characters yet...

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

"Everyone enjoys a good hanging!" Personally I think the pec flexing was a nice touch.

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

"Look at his face!"

Chief look at YOURS, don't be casting aspersions. #Monsterdon

@jonny

[Black Man looks threatening, Flexes Sexily]

#Monsterdon

His inability to fire his gun feels like a metaphor. #Monsterdon

The wigs in this are out of control #Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

It's just that his sidearm was out of butane #monsterdon

I almost thought I heard a Wilhelm scream

#Monsterdon

Man that Christ's been working on his abs. #monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Where'd he come and why's he flexing his pecs at a gun? Yeah sure if they're willing to kill a white dude they wouldn't dare shoot that random Black man. #monsterdon

Everyone needs a body guard who can dispatch a threat by merely a flex of the pecs #Monsterdon

okay, the Count's a jackass, but Pray for me! is *italian hand gesture* perfect.
#monsterdon

It's nothing, the priest is just flogging himself again? #MonsterDon

@SnoopJ little did we know that Peter Cushing and the Neil Diamond cosplayer are actually the titular twins

#Monsterdon

"pray for me! that's what you're supposed to do for sinners isn't it?"

#monsterdon

Diggin' Count Wayne Newton standing up to the Moral Majority

#Monsterdon

those pec flexes got their own lines in the script #monsterdon

Oh Peter Cushing. Nice. As a puritan elder? whut?
#Monsterdon #TwinsofEvil

Take that Grand Mof Oatmeal. #monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Count Corn stein looks familiar #Monsterdon

He got the biggest boner when she started laughing him, that's why he had to turn away #Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

There's a competitive swimmer in these here woods... #monsterdon

The only thing in need of burning is that shirt.

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Wait did this dude just throw her out of her own house?

#Monsterdon

Is there a way that both of these men can lose the movie

#Monsterdon

Showing up late for #monsterdon but I've come in on Peter Cushing walking in on some people canoodling so this is promising!

I'm getting secondhand shame just looking at loverboy's wig #Monsterdon

Looks like everybody expects the English Inquisition. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon Oh no, potential witch is hot. She’s doomed. But she has a Staunch Defender, who will prevent her from getting hotter. He’s Count Karnstein!

@apLundell It could be movie twenties though, which means in-universe they're like 11

#Monsterdon

"My apologies, with that frilly shirt we all thought you swang the other way" #monsterdon

That guys hair is way too perfect for someone who was just making out in bed #monsterdon

"..there is a higher authority!"
"Ohhhh, so the emperor enjoyed the brownies I sent?"

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

These twins have different accents #monsterdon

imagine being called out by a guy with hair like that
#monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Why do I hear Mat Berry?
#monsterdon

"there is a higher authority"
"it was a board room decision"
same energy.
#monsterdon

Strange Men in the Forest might be a better title for this #Monsterdon movie

@moira Build a bridge out of her!

#Monsterdon

Great Value Jimmy Fallon #Monsterdon

Apparently Peter Cushing doesn't know how to knock before entering.

#Monsterdon

In any case i think we have a #BechdelPass "In spirit" since the women are active agents of the plot, and i'm sure we'll get a technical pass eventually, but still... #monsterdon

oh man this guy wants to be tim curry so bad

#monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Frieda has apparently been through some shit. #Monsterdon

Neil Diamond ladies and gentlemen. #monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

#Monsterdon One of the twins has accurately identified Uncle Gustav as Creepy Incel.

Bring on the EEEEEEVIL! #monsterdon

#monsterdon BY BURNING THEM

still electable somehow

nothing so Christian and god-fearing as peering into a woman's how as she gets ready for bed. #monsterdon

waitaminute that's the Death Bed Shed!

#monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Wow, sure is a bright night out there. Hope they don't get a moon burn. #Monsterdon

Is that the Evil Dead house?

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Goody Hairdo cursed my dick, burn her #monsterdon

That hair is a witch! #Monsterdon

"You know men like that?" I know of them and young lady you stop right there. #monsterdon

So I haven't been keeping close track but i am actually not sure we have a #BechdelPass yet - carriage conversation was concerned with men, arrival supper was about how their uncle would react to their clothes, that conversation was just about the uncle too.... #monsterdon

Oh boy I bet this movie is going to treat race very respectfully

#Monsterdon

Good girl, kill the protestant prick :D #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Also why is the priest bullying his nieces? ???

It was the custom back then to go to bed in full makeup #monsterdon

@plaidtron3000
Getting Ovaltine

#Monsterdon

“BURN HER!” #Monsterdon

@Crazypedia Triffids

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon “She refuses to take a husband! Wicked! Immoral!” Puritans - the original incels.

i mean, she's not wrong

#monsterdon

#monsterdon The priest is mad because he never got laid. And he hates women. This is literally the time when in cells thrived.

Ok ok I'm here, I made some bomb ass beef quesadillas and guac, somebody catch me up #Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

@jammerb Ix-nay on the rocreation-pay! #MonsterDon

Puritans: A Bunch of pyromanians
#monsterdon

"...stamp out that evil!"
<cheers>
"We will lick the evil stamps!"
"No!"
"Use odd numbered stamps?"
"No!"
<looks of confusion>
"We will burn them!"
"Yaayyy! Wait ... if we burn the stamps, then we can't use them."
"Not the stamps, the witches!"
"You can use witches for postage?"

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Did anyone else read The Witch of Blackbird Pond as a kid? Anyone get that at the scholastic book fair? #monsterdon

I hope the Twins eat you all, and then spit out your blood for being too vile.

#monsterdon

Oh it’s sexy talk time already? #Monsterdon

@RufusJCooter The custom is to bury the deceased in Shake-n-Bake bags #monsterdon

The Brotherhood has a real hard-on for burning folk, don't they?

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

I see we're demonizing childless cat ladies again #Monsterdon

Yes, here we solve our problems by burning them.

Witches
Frankenstein
Wolfmen
Taxes

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Maybe instead of burning her they should try out for the position of husband

#monsterdon
#TwinsOfEvil

"Look ladies, women are only 'hot' here if I literally set them on fire, got it?"

#Monsterdon

Why don't they burn everyone just to be sure? If you can't make a heaven on Earth, surely you can make a hell?

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Wait, their parents have been dead for two months, and they're still not cold? Have y'all checked them with a Geiger counter?

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon The Brotherhood is meeting and, as usual, blaming women for everything.

Heheh

"We want to grant them mercy! BY BURNING THEM!!!"

Great enthusiasm, pete, I'm loving it :D #Monsterdon

oh yes, the girl lives alone, obviously a witch. girl, take 'em down. #monsterdon

@paco can't burn witches without your witch-burning boots

#Monsterdon

"I just came in to change my boots and catch my (nieces?) in flagrantly not-black garb."

#Monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

ok so clearly ALL of this is just an excuse for burning shit #monsterdon

Oh this is definitely a sermon. #Monsterdon #MonsterdonBingo

"what kind of plumage is that" says a man who wears tights and, i see, a silk cravat.
#monsterdon

BURN THE WITCH!

#monsterdon #TwinsOfEvil

Which is it? Many husbands or no husband? Jfc. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon oh look, it's the bitch-finder general

#RaisesHandSlowly I, I like oatmeal? #Monsterdon