How many toilet scenes are we going to have? #Monsterdon

#monsterdon "Don't wait for me here, wait for me in your room. Go away, now-awoooooo!"

NO AWOO
$350 FINE

so... he gets horny for some young babe; sees the pentagram on the hand of an older lady and then kills them because of course the legend is not only about sexual repression but misogyny.

#monsterdon

LOL @ unexpected passenger on the roof

#monsterdon

Is that Bea Arthur lookalike his mum? Again, I've not being paying attention

#monsterdon

#monsterdon MONSTER PAWS

I just need you to find 11,780 silver bullets. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Guts ripped open? Did I miss something?

LOL at Mrs Craptree in the shopping trolley

#monsterdon

This is a conservation problem. The natural environment for werewolves is woodsy rural areas. Plenty of space to roam, and the tree canopies can reduce overexposure to moonlight. Thanks to habitat destruction fed by rapid industrialization, werewolves are forced to adapt to increasingly urban environments.

#Monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

Those were some snazzy furry slippers. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon MONSTER CHOMP

"i think your father's a cross between abraham lincoln and jesus christ"

#Monsterdon

@Louisa I'm more upset by the lighting tbh. If you can afford Dean Stockwell, you can afford electricity!

#Monsterdon

I'm extremely amused at that ominous rising moon being a day or so past full.

#monsterdon

Those eyebrows. I see those eyebrows and I just think "THE TOOTH. REMEMBER THE TOOOOOTH" #monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

@realtegan A wolf leaps into Sam's body

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

That old lady putting on some moves with the "Oh I'm so drunk" and pentagram palm tattoo....it's a trusted play

#monsterdon

Okay that is weirdly the best toilet POV shot I have seen outside of anime.
#Monsterdon #WerewolfofWashington

Toilet cam?

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

".....or a stick with a silver handle" as you do.

#monsterdon

The balls of a man to go on about the White House in Communist Romania after admitting to killing a guy, "I know people!!"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Giselle looks a little like Lambert from Alien in this shot where she's being threatened by that big dog.

Are these wolves, or trombones?

#Monsterdon

"get in the car honey, I'm handling this" .....goes for a cry in the woods

#monsterdon

OMG the wood paneling!
#monsterdon

@Taweret Finally, a serious political thriller on #Monsterdon.

GOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGO
#monsterdon

#monsterdon
I hope everyone caught the speech during the credits? I'd understand if you rushed to turn it off right as the credits started rolling though.

@VoxofGod @YsengrinWolf George Papadapolos was my thesis advisor

(no not that guy, you know, the dad from Webster)

#monsterdon

i thought i listened to the intro exposition but i can't tell you who anyone is or why they are there just the same #Monsterdon

@moira They really did keep repeating his name a lot, didn't they?

Felt like i was watching Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie & Jack

#monsterdon

was the president supposed to be LBJ with his historic habit of conducting business on the toilet? idk anything about the like stereotypes or jokes about LBJ but maybe that was more current in 1973 #monsterdon

@jonny

I'm just going to say that what I took from that scene is that we don't know what powers Dr. Kiss has, but at least to werewolves, he has shown no malice.

#Monsterdon

I'm going to be waiting for Dr. Kiss to show up doing random Universal movie monster mad science in every film we watch from now on. #monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

#Monsterdon. Wait. Wait. Wait.

In the opening credits narration, Jack says this whole thing ended his career, right?

But [spoiler alert] he dies.

So. Which character was doing that retrospective voice-over narration at the beginning?

@howler0502 Maybe, but it's pretty rich after he spent the eight years prior demanding to see President Imhotep's birth certificate

#monsterdon
#TheMummy

@Lazarou ya right, like that whole subplot was a completely self-contained section from 59:54 - 01:06:28 that introduced us to the fact that a) there is a secret underground lab ??? and b) that the werewolf actually is fine if you just relax and say "wait! wait!" and pet his little cheekies a little bit

and then the rest of the movie kept going as if it never happened #monsterdon

@Taweret I think a good movie might be necessary, we're reaching some Cronenbergian depths of bad moviedom here lately T_T #Monsterdon

so, how do you think the papers handled the big heckin awoo from president pupper

#Monsterdon

@edenoi That is definitely accurate 👍

#Monsterdon

I started like 45 minutes late due to alcohol and hanging out with people, made it about 40 minutes in, and stopped because of alcohol and bedtime and I think I may have made the right choice #monsterdon

@Lazarou Somebody didn't do well at Film School #monsterdon

#Monsterdon

@MCDuncanLab @liferstate @Taweret Interesting take... personally I would say that speaks to it being a better experience but not necessarily a better movie.

I kind of relate it to Turkish Star Wars, which has occupied my brain on and off for almost 20 years despite being a clearly terrible movie (at least, I think pretty much anyone who's seen it would agree)

#Monsterdon

@strangefour That may be true, but personally I feel like Godmonster is beyond the whole concept of "trying to do". Whereas Werewolf did look like it was trying to do something, and I can kind of guess what that was, it just failed horribly.

#Monsterdon

@floatybirb Washington howling across the Delaware #monsterdon

i actually was not hurt by this movie nearly as bad as godmonster, so that's something

#Monsterdon

@floatybirb I would be happier if it were about how the founder of our nation was a lycanthrope #monsterdon

Godmonster might technically be worse, but it was closer to what it was trying to do than Werewolf of Washington. I think? It's hard to tell exactly what this was trying to do. It's not good satire at all.
#Monsterdon #WerewolfofWashington

@liferstate @diazona @Taweret I am confident we can find something worse to watch next #monsterdon

@MCDuncanLab @jonny ohh yeah that was one of the few things that did have a semi-logical explanation

#Monsterdon

I think this is the only thing I've seen Dean Stockwell in other than the Battlestar Galactica remake, so he has a history of playing characters that make no goddamn sense. #Monsterdon

@diazona @Taweret Godmonster is outsider art, beyond the normal boundaries of sense, good taste, or reality. Werewolf of Washington grasps at relevance, fails, and doesn't even deliver solid thrills to make up for the utterly flat satire. It's worse.

#Monsterdon

what kind of doctorate does dr kiss have that would lead him to people in whitehouse cage basement work? ....asking for a friend?
#Monsterdon

@Taweret YEAH

Seriously, why was Dr. Kiss even IN this movie? What was his PURPOSE #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon the credits did not disappoint.

@ewan@infosec.exchange @diazona lol, it does give you a taste of how the movie was though
Poor Dean Stockwell.

#monsterdon

@ewan @Lazarou Accurate

Everything in this movie was odd though so it kind of fits

#Monsterdon

My fellow A...Ameri...

My fellow...my fell...

AWOOOOOO!

Wonderfully awful. Thanks for the politically intriguing #Monsterdon @Taweret

Honestly though we need a whole 'nother movie about the Werewolf President, his Little Scientist and his Secret Basement of Horrors. Like that was so WTF and really presents questions that need answers!

@jonny
Quicker to timestamp all the scenes *not* in bathrooms.

#monsterdon

@SarraceniaWilds all very very good questions

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

@CactuarJoe doctor kiss was a legitimate scientist simply attempting to learn about the world around him, and i resent your efforts to smear his good name. #monsterdon

The moral is don't ask for a posting in Budapest to get away from your girlfriend #monsterdon

Ok where is dr kiss. I need to know. What was that basement. What the hell
#Monsterdon

There are two wolves inside me and they didn't understand this movie, either.
#Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe Tbh I think they were just sprinkling in Nixonisms wherever they could, regardless of whether they made sense in context.

#Monsterdon

@steggy I LOVED IT.

I'M GOING TO SEE IT AGAIN AND AGAIN.

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

@ewan @Lazarou Funnily enough the fox head cane had no relevance to anything else in the movie, after being set up as seemingly important in the first few minutes

#Monsterdon

Standard cop-out. COWARDS.

#monsterdon

@gnomon @blogdiva @Taweret
For #monsterdon, perhaps the phrase for the end should be “And that's a wreck”

ok all that's left is to go back and timestamp all the bathroom scenes #monsterdon

The very best of the worst. A truly awful movie. Made me vomit. 3/4 ⭐️#Monsterdon

This voice-over at the end is honestly better than the rest of the movie. #monsterdon

Okay, the President's speech over the credits is legit the best part of the film :D #Monsterdon

@SnoopJ AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

well, that was definitely one of the movies i have seen. #monsterdon

#monsterdon At least they talk you through the closing credits

@Taweret I have Godmonster as distinctly worse, but this is a strong contender too

#Monsterdon

Another #Monsterdon is in the can!

Thanks to @Taweret for hosting!

Tonight we had all kinds of capital canine hijinks, including:
- The strangest editing job ever seen. No scene too good for a dozen jump cuts!
- So many pentagons, I mean pentagrams.
- So much wicker furniture!
- Gutter dancing!
- A mad scientist with a secret monster lab underneath the White House!
- A flowery panic room with a disco ball in a cage!

#WerewolfOfWashington

that.

that might actually be the worst movie we've done

#monsterdon

"You guys won't have Jack Whittier to kick around anymore!"

Wait, JACK was the Nixon analogue!? #Monsterdon

oh and then it just suddenly ends i guess

okay

ty for joining, everyone!

#monsterdon

PRESIDENT WEREWOLF!!!!! #Monsterdon

my fellow americans this is president awoo

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

"Jack, I didn't know!!!!"

He EXPLAINED it to you!

#monsterdon

So ends another #Monsterdon. Thanks, as always, to @Taweret, and all the lurkers and posters. And remember, #Monsterdoners: Bury it, bury it, bury it, with last year's nerve gas.

#Monsterdon "I want to make one thing perfectly clear." he is Nixon. This is the Checkers speech. He's not a crook.

they didn't even use the silver handled cane????

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Are those shower curtains?

Someone decided this turd needed a State of the Union address over the credits and I 100% agree. #Monsterdon

"And so ... and so ... and so ... arwoooo!"

Also words of wisdom, Mr. President

#Monsterdon

president werewolf ahoy

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

@ewan @Lazarou The Werewolf of Washington, in case you were really asking

It is extremely bizarre

#Monsterdon

props to makeup and wardrobe for the 48 labor hours it took for every one of those transformation shots #monsterdon

@allanb Did they get peanuts? #monsterdon

#monsterdon Patricia Nixon .... Noooo!

WEREWOLF/DR KISS 2024 - TO THE MOON

#monsterdon

another

bathroom

#monsterdon #WerewolfOfWashington

did she fall on a water bed with green shag carpet over it?!?!

#monsterdon