I'm still thinking about a plot point in tonight's movie, "release the guillotine blade BUT THEN stop it just before it cuts her head off, BUT not too soon because she has to really be afraid for her life"
How long would a guillotine blade take to drop, 1 second?
One thing hasnβt changed since 1967: White people all look the same to Japanese, and one is a good as any other, so they just pull random foreigners off the street and put them in movies and TV dramas. #Monsterdon
kek China is to blame.
Big thanks to @Taweret for the week's choice of film. I'd somehow never seen *any* of it before, which made tonight's viewing (and commentary) particularly fun.
yeah those diplomats and politicians should go and bore the monster to death.
"Bad news from the immortality scientists - asphyxes are beginning to develop an immunity to Crystal Lightβ’" #monsterdon
@moira life comes at you fast on Monsterdon... #Monsterdon
... and we've (poorly) set up for the auto accident at the start of the film! The End. Go home now, there's not really much in the way of credits and absolutely no post-credit teaser.
@davesdogmaggie yeah, it took some time but it picked up and was pretty good. #Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972 Thanks y'all. π₯²
@apLundell These crystals are so magical that they're uhm... ... causing nuclear fission maybe?
OOOOOHHHHH!
You just solved why that dude's face is melted after all that time. He kept getting exposed to the crystals and all that radiation.
That's what happens when you have a diplomatic meeting without your staff members
Yes, it is over! I'm free, I'm finally freeeeee!!!!!!
This has to be one of the movies that I disliked most for plot reasons. This is an interesting premise, though balancing Men of Science(tm) vs tragedies of family and love can be hard. And this movie didn't manage it.
@socketwench just a Guinea Pig looking up at Earth's death sun.... #Monsterdon
Wouldn't the crystals in his phylactery eventually be consumed even if the water kept going?
Could we use the asphyx for faster than light communication?
Trap someone's asphyx, then send them to a remote location. Terminally injure them. Then the holder of the asphyx can carefully modulate how much light the asphyx receives. At the receiving end you record the pattern of agonal breaths as they start to die, then barely recover.
In this thesis I will
Well, that was definitely a movie about some Victorian weirdos who just wanted to try out different ways to kill people. Also a Death Muppet. Goodnight #monsterdon, give thanks for our host @Taweret , and see y'all next week!
Oh, there's the big kaboom!
@CactuarJoe not the worst but the most fucked up.
@ricci he gave up too easily, what a loser! #Monsterdon
*vague gesture at The Mask story in The King in Yellow as an alternate take*
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx ok so why does he look like leatherface in 1972 and what happened to him from the accident?
guess we'll never know
*gerbil fucks off into the sea*
good night everybody <3
And per usual: Who Blowed Up Better?
IT'S MIRU TIME!!!!
Even with immortality, he never saw England win a World Cup of Soccer.
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx GERBIL INHERITS THE EARTH
Giles confronts the undead guinea pig.
Why is he stupidly old, but the rodent is unaged?
Did not expect him to blow himself up lol
ok the last scene made it all worth it lmao #monsterdon
This movie fucked off into incomprehensibility.
![[empty]](/media/avatars/287224a269fbaefbc7e94920b207f9dca8b6e0415d818373c9f1528359b6a0e8.jpg){kind=small}
Wait are you kidding lol #monsterdon
"My only friend." the guinea pig should bite him and run away
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx *keeps building more and more elaborate deathtraps while adding a single safety at a time*
@apLundell You don't get to kill someone every day, they've got a whole bucket list of things they'd always wanted to try out!
SLOWLY release the blade?????? wtf
RETURN OF THE UNDEAD GUINEA PIG!
Why are they doing a different method of death each time? Do they think the Asphyxes would learn a pattern or something? This is not a movie about a serial killer with inventive kills each time. This is about a really stupid mad science thing involving a dumb scientist.
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx
Why a guilotine? You shoud keep on the electric chair, that was safe... ish
#monsterdon #theasphyx
good thing they had plexiglass and bottled oxygen in 1875 #monsterdon
They came up with different ways of killing people in an attempt to make the movie more exciting?
"MY ASS PHIX, MY ASS!"
why do we need a different method every time?
written in the envelope is just FUCK YOU
I wasn't expecting such an explosive ending.
nice twist
I'm sure there will be no obvious difference between the blue and the white crystals, no one will notice and it's the perfect crime
The murder schemes are getting increasingly dopey #monsterdon
#monsterdon Heyyyyy, it's our tall french friend!
βI want only to atoneβ
Dude, all you had to do was LISTEN TO YOUR DAUGHTER and none of this would have happened
honestly, the guinea pig twist bumps this movie up at least 1 star
Itβs getting Poe-ier and Poe-ier #Monsterdon
@strangefour Victorians were weird enough that I'd half expect they only had to chisel in the date of death.
#monsterdon He's immortal, so we now have someone who can truly indulge their joy in Lawn Dartsβ¦
Rodent's REVENGE #Monsterdon
She's now in the afterlife standing around with her dead brother talking about what a total dingus their father is
No, YOU'VE killed her, playa
Weird, I guess the immortality didn't do a whole lot for his manners or humility. Shocker. #monsterdon
They weren't able to get ahead of the situation
what in the wallace and gromit #monsterdon
This guillotine trick seems like a great idea. What could go wrong. #monsterdon
LMAO Revenge of the Guinea Pig
ridiculous
"Okay dad, and don't take this the wrong way, but HOLY SHIT." #monsterdon
You'll have immortal PTSD, dear. :D Because we love you. #monsterdon
lol, "oopps"
#Monsterdonπ§π‘π€΅ββοΈ π π» 𧴠π±
Dude, you're immortal. You can afford the time to help out with your friend's research. You can wait for your daughter to think about things. You're immortal. No more rushing about. Weirdo.
"eeee, eee, revenge shall be mine! vengeance for all the small and furry!" #Monsterdon
Wait they've had a butler this whole time? What does HE think of this stuff? #monsterdon
in this universe, you can't die if you're not afraid
Oh my god are we going to spend the rest of this movie badgering the woman into this shit
lol, love the cut to the guillotine, the electric chair wasn't enough then ?
Wouldn't poison be better? Less violent?
@Bluedepth That makes more sense than the leaps of illogic I've heard from this movie.
try being immortal for like one day to see if there are side effects before forcing your daughter to do it #monsterdon
Sir Hugo is turning into an Aztec Mummy maybe #monsterdon
β« A little ~maaaaad science~ βͺ :D #Monsterdon
This is their proof?? Telling her after the fact that the coffin was airtight? #monsterdon
@CactuarJoe kinky posh fucks... #Monsterdon
when is the ass fix gonna get loose and kill these people #monsterdon
@EmptySet This seems more like an extraction and capture of some death spirit or just suspension of his soul, a kind of synthetic vampire
They really should have anticipated the possibility of someone breaking into the asphyx room at some point during eternity
but given the lack of planning in the rest of this movie, it kinda checks out
Ok, dude is literally sleeping in a coffin, what even the
Forced Immortalisation, the old british curse....
Vampires gotta make more vampires, huh daddy :/ #Monsterdon
@strangefour heat death of the universe, what then?!
Being patronized by men: a timeless experience
#Monsterdon
I love how she is debating whether he should be immortal after he has already crossed the threshold and the only other option is to die immediately...
"I bet her asphyx is HOT" - this dude, probably
Oh something tells me this lil guy has a much bigger role to play yet. #Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972
You really shouldn't jump in this early on in the early adopter cycle. There's a lot of kinks to work out in the new technology π»
#monsterdon #theAsphex
βSnared for eternityβ
I donβt think the materials you used are gonna last as long as you think they are