I don't think they made it. #Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972

#Monsterdon🧐🏡🤵‍♂️ 💀 👻 🧴 😱

at least Giles has a lovely smoking jacket with *velvet* ✅ lapels

#bingo

I appreciate the ostensibly-dark room being light enough for us to see the actors clearly. These days, I'd have to turn my monitor's contrast to "absurdly bright" to have a chance to make anything out.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

LMAO the video of Clive's fatal plonk #monsterdon

#monsterdon

To sleep, perchance to.. BONK..

"and what do the smudges look like to you, Rorschach?"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon hahaha OMFG and the followup footage of the incident, the only thing missing is 🎶 "The Entertainer"

Not your normal bangers and mash.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Well, this one's a floater.

"She must have been sucked over the weir."

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972

Good heavens.

#monsterdon

though I suppose it could be worse, there are more embarrassing ways to die

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

“Oh my hobby is photographing people at the moment of death. But first, let’s make a family movie…”

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

ohhhh its like Workers Leaving the Lumiere Factory but with a soul and a body

#monsterdon

Victorians and their well-known brittle craniums

#Monsterdon 👻 #TheAsphyx1972

"We call him Cleaved Clive now...."

#monsterdon

How did his little camera know to zoom in on the head bonk moment? Is it powered by AI? #monsterdon

lol, how did he get that closeup?

#Monsterdon

Live footage of this guy's afterlife unfolding. #Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972

Well that was unexpected.
#Monsterdon

A death by fifteen minutes? It'd be fortuitous, except this didn't involve a monster.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

This plot reminds me of Robert J. Sawyer’s The Terminal Experiment, published in 1995. I wonder if he had seen this movie before writing his novel.

#Monsterdon

ok maybe there was some establishing information in the first 10 minutes but i'm tuning in and that guy was just murdered by hitting a tree branch at like 1 mph #monsterdon

now his CLOTHES are.... Black as night!!!

#monsterdon

You have to die here so he can record your death. Checkhov's ghost camera.

#Monsterdon

SSPCA called for cruelty to furry animal hair pieces
#monsterdon

That boy had a glass forehead.

#Monsterdon

🎶 dumb ways to die 🎶

#Monsterdon

is the asphyx just british people drowning because they can't swim? #monsterdon

"This will make a GREAT tik tok!!"

#monsterdon

HOW BLACK IS IT!? #monsterdon #theasphyx

Oh, that's why they were shouting. I thought they were only feet apart.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972

"For five hundred years now..."
*walks inside*
*takes of hat*
*prepares drink*
*walks into the cellar*
"...we have enjoyed enormous privileges."
#monsterdon

bonk #monsterdon

#monsterdon

HILARIOUS death scene.

Look out for that tr---
George of the Jungle he ain't.
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Swamp Thing where?

#monsterdon

...and the river is full of piranhas #monsterdon

BONK

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Hahahahahahahaha. Period Britiain's funniest home movies. #monsterdon

lol, there it is!

#MOnsterdon

The exciting "boating in the river" scene.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon BONK

Is this Chekov's drowning incident?

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

How cunning can ham be, really

#Monsterdon

it's for the 'gram

#Monsterdon

Row row row your boat. Gently down the plot contrivance~
#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

@LuluHelle he's the inspiration fer the "broccoli cut"

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

He's literally a punter.

I have also photographed the dead. The Grateful Dead. Coachella, 2015. My photos were all smoky, too. It's just what happens at their shows.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

A movie camera? My anachronism alarm is blaring. #monsterdon

Ah, the genuine vampire crypt

#Monsterdon

"I'd like to register a complaint. This dead parrot has a smudge."

"No it doesn't."

"It's right here!"

"That's just some jam."

"No it's not! It's a smudge!"

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

yes, a river! portends death #monsterdon

What is that squeaking noise?
#Monsterdon

So far I've gathered that the main guy is remarrying after being a longtime widower, and 2 or more of his adult children are marrying each other? Is that right

#Monsterdon

"Social Reforms? HAW HAW!"

#monsterdon

they also talk too much. stop talking! #monsterdon

"The soul as it departs the body. [no reaction] At DEATH [gasp]"

#Monsterdon

trying to figure out if that guy has trained an animal to sit still on his head, bad wig or wild hair cut.
#monsterdon

That's a verry not-bumpy ride in a carriage
#Monsterdon

casually wandering around in the tombs for laff

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

#monsterdon The Cunninghams? Can't wait for the Arthur Fonzarelli to pop up from one of the coffins, give the double thumbs and go EYYYY

@oli Yes. It's true. This man has no John Thomas #monsterdon

“You may be an undigested bit of beef, a blot of mustard, a crumb of cheese, a fragment of underdone potato. There's more of gravy than of grave about you, whatever you are!”

#monsterdon

...Is there a reason we had to have this conversation in a tomb? #Monsterdon

these guys can't even do science-talk, just pseudoscience-talk. BORING #monsterdon

That's a really clean crypt. #monsterdon

This Glendale studio has access to a Hammer-quality crypt #monsterdon

#Monsterdon🧐🏡🤵‍♂️ 💀 👻 🧴 😱

ok they're clearly not in a buggy that's moving because they're bouncing at different rates and amplitudes

well *my* spirit is certainly leaving my body right now #monsterdon

"The soul departs the body.... AT DEATH" actually I think mine left just watching this

#monsterdon

I, A WEALTHY SIR WITH GROWN CHILDREN DESIGNED MY OWN PHOTOGRAPHIC EQUIPMENT, AND THEREFORE IT IS PERFECT.

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Smudgegate!

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

told ya

#monsterdon

Imagine you're trying to just die already and these pompous assholes are standing there with this giant Victorian cameras

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Three different incompetent photographers

#Monsterdon

throwing down a crisp $5 bill saying the smudges are the soul

#monsterdon

The Smudge from Planet Yuggoth. #Monsterdon

Oh, my they are all so frightfully frightfully plummy. The recieved accent is so overdone, it's almost comical.

#monsterdon

The slides have one other thing in common: you picked them to be part of this presentation

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

Y'know, the Japanese have a stereotype for white people that we all have big noses. I think the cast of this film might prove them right. #Monsterdon

@MatthewTitus88 lol my sentiments exactly, just want to watch them get killed now #monsterdon

The last card in the deck 😏
Some might say, the joker 😏
I can't imagine what you mean 😏

All the actors in this went to the Royal Smarm Academy

#Monsterdon

My bingo card has "instant regret" on it.

Is that MY regret, or one of the characters'...?

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx

These people are "sirs", they just gave that shit out to any random photographer of dead people didn't they

#Monsterdon

Mystery smudges! #Monsterdon

And this spot is when spaghetti sauce dripped onto my lens.

#monsterdon

Mmmmm, good old-fashioned Spiritualism.

#monsterdon #TheAsphyx

I’m sure that’s exactly what I’ll look like when I die.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

THese are some scary dead people.

they have one thing in common: an Eton accent!

#monsterdon

everything in this scene is gingerbread hued
#monsterdon

have no idea who's getting to married to whom and I don't care #monsterdon

Tell her about your special interests, Sir.

#Monsterdon #TheAsphyx1972

"Then I will give you children. I'll scrounge them up somewhere, I'm sure."

#Monsterdon

Ghosts. He photographs ghosts. #Monsterdon

"Let's get married! What do I do for a living? OOOOH, it'd be BORING for you! *snicker snicker*" #Monsterdon

I do usually like it when the cold open isn’t separated from the main plot of the movie by more than 50 years

#Monsterdon

I think to myself sometimes during Monsterdon. Most of these movies were probably played in theaters.

#Monsterdon

Stop laughing y'all arent that funny

#monsterdon