my gods, LASERMEN #monsterdon

fucking dragur everywhere in these tunnels

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

#monsterdon

I want the next headwear to double as a cornucopia.

Oh no! The Doublemint Ghosts!

#monsterdon

@hollie Second only to the cocaine budget.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Why does she have Thai classical dancer gold fingernails??

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHerculesIi1985

I wonder what they used to give Ferringo that distinctive sheen.

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

oh, so she freezes them while they're doinkin', or preparing to doink? Moments of great tension?

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

"Who art thou?"

Why the Shakespearian Moment here #Monsterdon

How do you know what mummies are Mr. Ancient Greek Demigod?

#Monsterdon

“Follow me, girls who might be Amazons or might be 90’s ravers” #Monsterdon

She one of the gorgons?

#Monsterdon

Everyone in this cave is well oiled #Monsterdon

"They look so real..."

They're... They're people in caked makeup. C'mon. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon🧔‍♂️ 💪 ⛰️⚡ ⛈️ 🌌 😱

that up was so close I saw her contact lenses

scene: 👀

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

@CactuarJoe Because they went into the "stone mouth" #Monsterdon #TheAdventuresofHercules1985

Check out the nails!

#Monsterdon

I can't be sure about the realism of glaucia's shoes, but they're close enough that I'm going to call "fuck heels" #monsterdon

At least the women’s costumes aren’t just swim suits with weird fringe hanging from the crotch this time

#Monsterdon

Menusa, Gorgons for Men. #Monsterdon

Okay, I obviously misheard (my ears aren't great) but to me it sounded like she said "I am Urine." #Monsterdon

"He's a super bad guy. Should we really wake him?"

"We can handle him."

That always goes well.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Herc just thou-ing someone at first glance? What a jerk!
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Chappell Roan?

#monsterdon

It's a rare pleasure to have you in our midst.

Oh, thanks, this is a lovely uh, midst you have here.

#monsterdon

A lot of body oil in this movie

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

earthlings

#monsterdon

Keeping his pecs well oiled makes Hercules particularly sensitive to the air flow. #Monsterdon

Ok, Euryale is a trap I'd fall into.
I'd be the stone statue with a dopey and slightly letcherous look on his face, and his belt half unbuckled.

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

"they look real"

sir you JUST met this woman

#Monsterdon

"Lady your "palace" looks like my mom's basement"

#monsterdon

Never trust smiling statues #Monsterdon

Herc, suddenly oiled up. #Monsterdon

The fuck are they that she's like, "Wazzaaaaaappppp, Earth filthies"?

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

Sleestaks.

#Monsterdon

Hercules seems much more confidant now. Seasoned.

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

Oh look, someone took the time to oil Herc's Pecs between the last scene and this one. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

The headwear is getting sillier..

Oh good, cave mood lighting. #Monsterdon

I am u r aly #monsterdon #hercules1985

“Some gods are evil.”

“How can we tell the difference?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

That was an actual line. He just shut her up, saying “Don’t worry about it.”

#Monsterdon

I first saw it on a Michael Nyman album cover!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noises,_Sounds_%26_Sweet_Airs#/media/File:Noisessounds&sweetairs.jpg

#monsterdon

"Who are you? And who does your wardrobe, we need to have words."

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

All oiled up and everything
#Monsterdon

GOODEEEEVENING #monsterdon #hercules1985

The Slime people are easily startled, but they’ll soon be back… and in greater numbers!

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

These are some cheesy slime monsters. But quick—inside the stone mouth #Monsterdon

Slime people fight just like those minions on a supersentai series, like Changeman
#monsterdon
#Hercules1985

"Something lives in here (the stone mouth)."

#Monsterdon #AdventuresOfHercules1985

Quick! into the open mouth cave. It looks safe.

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

love getting flash-banged with a retro computer startup flashing screen every time Hercules throws a punch

#Monsterdon

They cut just before that horse took a shit lol.

#Monsterdon

"Inside the stone mouth."?#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresofHercules1985

That was some trash budget gilly suit sub Doctor Who monster effect. #Monsterdon

They were Sleestaks from the Land of the Lost!
#monsterdon

#monsterdon

I hate it when the Sleestax try to hold you with suction..

Smart of them to shoot the stair scene from afar so the audience wasn’t distracted by that generous bosom still bouncing at the bottom.
#Monsterdon

for every other fault of this film... Ferrigno is the least of its worries

#monsterdon

"Inside the stone mouth"

oooooo

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Good job figuring out the air currents Sherlockurles

#monsterdon

“Quick, inside the stone mouth!”

Why does this sound like the opposite of a good idea?

#Monsterdon

Look, the first Ator movie had better cinematography than this film. Do you understand how tragic that is? #Monsterdon

"Quick! Inside the stone mouth!"

I count four slime man suits.

#Monsterdon #AdventuresOfHercules1985

"Good girl"

Somewhere, a trans woman felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

Or multiple places, because one of them is here.

#Monsterdon

"there are evil gods"

yeah, some of them made this movie.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

These guys must weight like 20 kg apiece. They get flung around so well. #Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Which creature from the Slime Lagoon has quest coupon number two?

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

"Good, Evil - I'm the one with the gods."

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Director: "Okay, everybody, I need you to make this noise with your mouths."

#Monsterdon

Okay look they get you by suction so QUICK, EVERYONE, GRAB A CONCAVE SURFACE

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

I may have to clip out that "Good Girl" and turn it into a notification on my phone. ............ for personal reasons. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon
#Hercules1985
Hercules punches with the force of 1960s Batman. Pow!

"QUICK! Escape into the obvious trap!" #Monsterdon

“Quick! Inside the stone mouth right next to where you were tied up. That seems to be the safest place.”

#Monsterdon

I mean, it looks like these two ladies can hold their own against these things. Why do the need Hercules when they can save their own silken flanks? #Monsterdon

Because "inside the stone mouth" isn't ominous or anything

#Monsterdon

Get in my (stone) mouth if you want to live.

#monsterdon

"inside the stone mouth"

yeah, because that seems like a safe location. nothing weird could ever possibly be in there.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

the slime people

#Monsterdon

He can launch a log to escape velocity but he can't instantly take care of a few slime dudes? #monsterdon

It wouldn't be called "forbidden valley" if was a charmign neighborhood
Althoug it looks like a nice place.
#monsterdon
#Hercules1985

In the laaaa-aaaand of the bu-uut pluuuuuuuuuugs

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Quick! Inside the stone mouth! We'll hold them with suction!

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

@Binder Uh oh... guess they're gonna steal all elements of them film too? #Monsterdon #TheAdventuresofHercules1985

That's right, punch the cameraman!

#monsterdon

Did he give her a "Good girl" in that fight? Astonishing dialogue. #Monsterdon

New question: Is Hercules (still) married?

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

Hercules now with power flash Pew-Pew fists. #Monsterdon

Those are some Power Rangers Putty Patrol leaps if I've ever seen 'em.

#monsterdon

the slime people are afraid of cherry eyes

#monsterdon

HAHAHAHA I want a cave with an entrance like that. Please and thank you.
#Monsterdon

#monsterdon There’s a lot of juicy here.

@nev we had one good line last time, too

#Monsterdon

That gaping mouth-- that's not a set, it's an actual place! Does anyone recognize where this is?

#monsterdon

Superman Swamp Romp!

#monsterdon

Superman II, Forbidden Planet, Swamp Thing, we're getting loads of movies in one!

#Monsterdon

...is that a buddah in the background? what?

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Color punch is very batman

#Monsterdon