Zardos?

Is that ... you ???

#monsterdon

he didn't throw a single bear into space. zero space bears. 0/5 would not recommend

ty for joining, everyone!!

#monsterdon

For a football player / bodybuilder turned into an actor, you gotta admire the dynamic range that Lou Ferrigno can produce.

#monsterdon

I don't care who you blame Zeus. I blame you. It's always starts with your nonsense.

#Monsterdon

Still a better Hercules than Kevin Sorbo

#Monsterdon

Excellent fight choreography. #monsterdon #hercules1985

GOT IT! It's the Gardens of Bomarzo! Which sounds like a monsterdon title itself.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gardens_of_Bomarzo

#monsterdon

Celebrity cameo: the invisible Id monster from Forbidden Planet

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

The Adventures of Hercules (1985) - 5/5

Permanent ballistic damage to my brain

#monsterdon #monsterdonReviews

OH FATHER TIME!!!!!

#monsterdon #bestOfMonsterdon #TimeSkullsOfMonsterdon #HonkinShnozCupsOfMonsterdon

This movie was made. People worked on it. Someone decided to spend money making it. How. #monsterdon #hercules1985

LOOK at 1:14:36 they show someone ELSE traveling by yeet-propelled boulder chariot. so YES throwing a boulder into space when it is tied to something is a canonical mode of transit in this universe

#monsterdon #conspiracyTheoriesOfMonsterdon #transitModalitiesOfMonsterdon

THE
END
?

#Monsterdon

It was so bad, so good, so bad, also good, and yet, BAD! 😂

Thanks for the laughs everyone!

Thanks to @Taweret for hosting!

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

What the hell is going on with this costume!?

#monsterdon

@jonny I will never look at rotoscoped neon dinosaurs the same way again

#monsterdon

The constellation Hercules looks exactly like an outline of Lou Ferrigno. That's scientifically accurate.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

just fucking RELEASE me from this movie what is happening #monsterdon

what is happening.
what is happening.
what is happening
#monsterdon

I hope he pushes some pillars over later...

#monsterdon

That is too many muscles.

#monsterdon

[someone comes in late] Did I miss anything?

NO

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

“There, that wasn't very good now, was it?” But I guess we knew that going in 😀. Thanks for gathering the troops @Taweret And for the support @Cherizilla and @JoeWynne Always a fun #Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe It is amazing how on many technical levels that was a movie and competently made. But by every measure of quality or taste that was so garbage.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

For my money, TAoH wasn't really a movie, it was just a bunch of individual scenes that happened to be leaning against each other. #Monsterdon

They're going to need SO much family therapy after this

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

Someone MADE this movie.

Think about that.

#Monsterdon

these fucking wipes are killing me this is amazing #monsterdon

imagine finding this script written in some spiral notebook in your friends house and the immediate concern you would have for their mental wellbeing #monsterdon

The city is like "Everything is stupid, let's burn"

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

Oh god it's like someone smoked a lot of weed and then watched Tron and was like, "BUT....GREECE....hear me out"

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

gender criticism: you see hercules is kenlike and dickless while daedalus has a giant fuckin shnoz cup. this represents the struggle between science and religion #monsterdon

At last some "feats of strength" this is what I expected.

#monsterdon

"He's nothing but bones"

ho ho ho we've got a real genius right here... oh

we *had* a real genius right here.

#monsterdon

Not chewbacca! Don't kill chewy!!

#Monsterdon

Little people are ants, yes?

#Monsterdon

@diazona Here's the unmodified original, in case anyone wants to use it.

#monsterdon

Animated light Hercules isn’t nearly as buff as Lou Ferrigno Hercules.

#monsterdon #IncredibleHerc #hercules1985

oh thank Zeus, it's done

cool facts: Eva Robin's, who played Daedalus, is trans

TIL

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

Wow this was RIDICULOUS, I love it!

I am now sad I missed the first one! I had so much fun I cannot describe! This was absolutely terrible but in a very enjoyable way. Thank you @Taweret
for organizing and everyone who suggested this cinematic experience. I still can’t believe this movie was made and people spent money on it!

#monsterdon #hercules1985

Hercules fucks off back into space (but like, being a constellation, so even MORE fucking off into space than going to Olympia, which is in space)

that was one of the movies of all time

#Monsterdon

What in the sweet fuck was that movie. #monsterdon

Well Herc finally yeeted something into space. but it was a snake made of cartoon light who was King Minos... This movie is so fucking dumb.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

I'm sure glad that Zeus told us how that turned out cause I had no fucking idea

#monsterdon

They keep saying "science" and I feel like maybe they should've looked it up in a dictionary at some point. #Monsterdon

enemies:

✅mop
✅trash
✅light

#monsterdon

The one man who can defeat Hercules is... the last guy Herc killed before being elevated to a God. Brilliant!
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

LOL, my wife fell asleep halfway through, so now we’re watching the end again so she can see how it wraps up. It doesn’t make more sense the second time through.

#monsterdon #hercules1985

🦖#MONSTERDON Goodbye!

❤️ Thank you @Taweret for hosting this superfluous sequel!

🅱️ and thanks @cherizilla for the Bingo card! My favorite: "Hand drawn lightning".

🎞️ and more thanks to @paco for data analysis and @combatwombat for the replays. And to @ryan for the stream and double feature
and @randy_s for the beverage this week.

🦖And to all the members of the Real Time Film Analysis Squad: Please review the logic used to select this movie from the others in the poll.😆

Another mighty showing! Thanks to the 8th thunderbolt @Taweret for hosting and to the #Monsterdon costume department for keeping things breezy.

The rest of my comment has been replaced by a cartoon ape.

🦍

And so Hercules fucked off (again) into the sea of stars never to be seen agai.. wait lemme check... yeah, ok, never to be seen again. Thanks to the usual crew and good night! #monsterdon

So Zeus could just have solved this by himself and just delegated the tasks?
#monsterdon #hercules1985

@ricci come watch THE ADVENTURES OF HERCULES (1985)

you'll pay for the whole seat but you'll only need the edge for 3 minutes out of 88

#Monsterdon

That's exactly how Space works.....

...the Earth just spinning off somewhere, without it's Moon...it's fine......

#Monsterdon

Man they're making it harder and harder for him to find a girlfriend

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

This is the best movie

#monsterdon

Okay but what if instead of a sword fight a cartoon sword fight? And what if instead of making sense, a dinosaur? And what if instead of all those things, Kong vs Godzilla?

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

WHAT THE HELL

I think they had much better drugs in the 80s

#monsterdon

A FUCKING DINOSAUR????

#monsterdon

Oh, right, Zeus, famously on good terms with his father--- OH WAIT DID HE JUST SUMMON A SPACE SKULL TO MURDER CHAOS CODPIECE OUT OF NOWHERE THIS FUCKING RULES

#monsterdon

Glossia, we lossia

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

Guys I'm starting to regret this whole "Bring Minos back from the dead" plan

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

what happened in the cultural imagination of the 70's and 80's that made nets seem so goddamn powerful #monsterdon

It feels so weird to have a movie with Zeus as the pure good hero God. I guess that's what you get when a Hercules nepotism movie is made.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

"who art thou"
"I sha'nt be long"

what is this, a youtuber's novel?

#Monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ ADVENTURES OF TRIVIA 💪✨

Effects look like other movies?

Director Luigi Cozzi in Cinefantastique:

"What can I do? In Italy, when you bring a script to a producer, the first question he asks is not 'What is your film like?' but 'What film is your film like?' That's the way it is in Italy. We can only make Zombi 2, never Zombi I."

#TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

"why do our gods permit it"

lady have you MET your gods?

#monsterdon

This was objectively bad parenting by Hera.

#monsterdon #hercules1985

Raymond Bar? Oh the strobbing is going to be really bad in this. My eyes.
#Monsterdon #Godzilla1977

So what did we learn, kids?

Science is evil, shields are cool, dinosaurs are from space, and the moon is trying to kill us! #monsterdon #hercules1985

Now available as a box set!

#Monsterdon

People got paid real money to make that movie.

And thought it was worth doing?

I, uh, I'm speechless.

Anyway, thanks for all the hilarity in the timeline. Y'all are the delightfuly dorkiest!

And as always, thanks @Taweret for hosting, condolences for the lack of yeeted space bears.

#monsterdon #spacebears

#monsterdon

I have never seen ANYTHING like this. They were on crack.

@arrjay Yes, that's how he created the continents. Remember? #Monsterdon #TheAdventuresofHercules1985

And then we destroyed this model of ancient greece because we already paid for it. #monsterdon

So THAT'S what the constellation of the guy in a miniskirt is

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

Love how the star is right there in his nostril, like a galactic bat in the cave

#Monsterdon
#TheAdventuresOfHercules

Everything happened, and now everything is over

#monsterdon

for once, denouement

in a movie where truly we have no reason whatsoever to care

#Monsterdon

Wow! The stakes couldn’t be lower! Cartoon Godzilla vs cartoon King Kong

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

I understand nothing, and love everything

#monsterdon

DSFDFJAKFEWFAIHDSGDSAFDNFAVREVADSFDSAJFDANRIREEAOIUDJD

#monsterdon

A dinosaur.

Sure. Why the hell not, movie. Why the hell not

#Monsterdon

Are we sure this script wasn’t by Ken Kesey?

#monsterdon #hercules1985

Hercules fights for the users

#Monsterdon

Two movies with king Minos and NOT ONE GODS DAMNED MINOTAUR IN SIGHT! WTF movies??
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

what the hell am i even looking at i can't move on from the father time skull zapping daedalus off of their skull tower #monsterdon

"No, you can do nothing zeus, for though you are the light, I am the darkness, thus we are alike"
"except for one thing, I possess time."
"OH FATHER TIME!"

I HAVE REWOUND THIS THREE TIMES AND I WILL KEEP DOING SO NO MATTER HOW DESYNCED I GET #monsterdon

somehow, Minos returned

(at the risk of paying this movie a compliment: at least it bothered to explain how)

#Monsterdon

@paco SCIENCE! The full unbridled power of science is contained within that costume.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

#monsterdon Science was really weird back then.

side plot: urania joins a brain uploading cult #monsterdon

FINALLY HE YEETED SOMETHING! We've been set free.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

obviously this guy has a thunderbolt, he basically makes it his whole personality #monsterdon

@jonny Thunderbolts go in the Thunderbolt Dock

#monsterdon

Awakened you? Dude you were BONES.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Ah the classic Greek creature, Bigfoot.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Ferrigno really selling the air of a man not sure how he should be feeling about anything, ever.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

I'm sure all of this exposition will end up mattering, if I'm any judge of Monsterdon movies

#monsterdon

We have a ✅ Virgin! And it's not going well for her. #monsterdon