that is a BIG cave, dang

#monsterdon

#monsterdon #hercules1985

One sister gets stuck in, the other just gets pushed around...

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

Punch-cam!

Rita Repulsa sent her acrobatic minions!
#Monsterdon

These tracks are side by side. Slime people always walk single file, to hide their numbers!

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

Didn't he have a little leather skirt last time? Now he's got leather undies with pointless side bits? #monsterdon

Did this just turn into Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, with the way these slime monsters are jumping and flipping into the fight?

#Monsterdon

We rented a pneumatic catapult and by god we're gonna use it. #Monsterdon

Orcus?

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

#monsterdon Peter Criss?

👊 🔴 🟢

#monsterdon

Urania kidnapped by Slime People!? That's w--

#Monsterdon

My forbidden valley is a VERY dangerous region. #Monsterdon #Hercules1985

THE SLIME PEOPLE. I love it.

#monsterdon

"You should know this is a very dangerous region!

"It's full of mossy statues!"

#monsterdon

"I'm on a horse."
#monsterdon

@Lazarou

[Dares not look up Lou's political affiliation on Wikipedia]

#Monsterdon

Fish man corpse. With many pointy spears in it.

#Monsterdon #AdventuresOfHercules1985

someone destroyed a Tandy Leather here.

#monsterdon

Hercules is so strong he pushed apart two frames of this movie and inserted frames of an entirely different movie between them

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Minos wants to go back to SLEEP

#monsterdon

I'll help you as soon as the DMT flashbacks end. #Monsterdon

These teleportation effects are somethin else. Hope you weren't aiming for stealth.
#monsterdon

Sound engineer with one of those 1980s Laser Blaster toys

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

#monsterdon

One of the goddesses lost a bet and they have to wear a tree on their head.

The Godesses apparently all curl their hair
#Monsterdon

[scribbling notes]

Me: okay, I need bones AND blood…

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

okay the dripping blood onto the skeleton is a pretty cool set piece

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Well, Chewbacca is apparently exothermic.

Jim Henson in a headband

Nyssa in a 1920s flapper headgear

#monsterdon

one must take life. your. *zap*

okay, poorly delivered, but actually hilarious writing.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Safety woman!
#Monsterdon

The best Herc was DJ Kool Herc, founder of hip-hop.

#monsterdon

He shall rise again! To be upright bones!

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Ah, the old 'sealed baddie in a tomb from the first movie' routine...

#Monsterdon

"Magic icepick? Sure.
I was just going to use a bag of salt."

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Call me obtuse, but I suspect the glowing thing does not contain the secrets of *darkness* per se. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Spaceman Hercules! Arriving in a splutch of fluid, white fluid, godstuff. SURE. **throws kleenex box**

Seems like the monsters are just going to come find Herc. This should be over in 15 minutes!

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

@MatthewTitus88 It was kind of a great movie

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Awooooo!

#Monsterdon

“You always wanted to know the secrets of darkness…”

Pick-up lines from Greek mythology.

#Monsterdon

...So she hired Hegseth? #Monsterdon

FYI, Lou Ferrigno experienced 85% hearing loss as a toddler and it wasn't fixed with cochlear implants until 2021. Yes, even during this movie he was almost deaf. #Monsterdon

So they basically hired Gore-Ass because he was the most desperate?

#monsterdon

"Flora!"

"Fauna!"

"Fungi!" #monsterdon

"I know that because I hold the lifesaver of prophecy" #Monsterdon

"Ambitious, few scruples, and dumber than a sack of hammers. Perfect!"

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

i can't tell any of these gods and goddesses apart but i know it doesn't matter

#monsterdon

The level one boss had a thunderbolt! #monsterdon

I wonder if the glare's gonna be there the whole time? #Monsterdon #TheAdventuresofHercules1985

Wait, it was the LIGHTNING BOLT's fursona? #Monsterdon

Quest coupon number one acquired.

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Now for some greek wrestling witha guy in a ghillie suit for the fetishists in the audience

#Monsterdon

And the day is saved thanks to Stickules.
Wait that was a thunderbolt? Whut? I... how does that work?
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Enkidu from Epic of Gilgamesh has to take whatever work he can get these days. #Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Hercules used Murder Stick

It was super effective!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon

This yeti is going to become a yeeti.

Herc, don't hit him! He's just trying to wish you a Happy Life Day!

#Monsterdon

Do you feel punched in the face yet?

#monsterdon

Herc vs. Bigfoot!

#Monsterdon
#Hercules1985

Hercules looked a bit like a muscular Ken doll.

#Monsterdon

did the horse just howl?

#monsterdon

Am I watching the right one?

#monsterdon

Herc is still lacking something #Monsterdon

"We must summon the greatest warrior ever known" But since Schwarzenegger is waaaaay to expensive we'll summon Hercules instead. #Monsterdon #Hercules1985

That's $350 in the awoo jar for you, and $350 in the awoo jar for you, and

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Yep, the nekkid Ken Doll Hercules is just as disturbing this time

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Wait a minnit... are we doing oracular crap, or summoning the little fairy twins linked to Mothra? Oh, why not. EVERYONE ENJOY THE MONSTERDON JAMBOREE!!!

uh

where'd he get the horse?

is that a space horse?

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Retrieve my seven thunderbolds of exposition, Hercules!

#Monsterdon

Ken doll Hercules

#monsterdon #theadventuresofhercules1985

that's exactly how the moon orbits the Earth, jauntily!

#Monsterdon

“Ok but we can only go to the valley after our shift at Sbarros” #Monsterdon

I'm sorry is that ZEUS lamenting that there's wickedness in Olympus?

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

Partial transparency is an indication of power, judging by Zeus here, right?

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

THEY ARE CRYING FOR HERCULES

THE PEOPLE! DEMAND! HERCULES!

HERCULES SMASH!

#monsterdon

You could have solved this if you enlisted Prometheus, Zeus...

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

Is that a different Zeus? Is Lou the only returning actor?
#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

#Monsterdon

The flesh colored moodandis make him look like a Ken doll.

Hercu-- who? Never heard. #monsterdon

Hercules divided the continents and set the constellations. He yeeted a cow and log into space. He’s invincible, but he’s really weak when it matters.

#Monsterdon

Does this ephemeral conversation pass the Bechdel test?
Oh, nope. They mention a man (Hercules). dammit
#Monsterdon

She has nice teeth at least
#Monsterdon

Please play the intro again

#Monsterdon

Man, Zoom was way better when you had to stare into a flame for the duration of the call. #monsterdon

Hercules has knockoff Mothra fairies

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

So if 4 Gods stole 7 bolts and split them evenly, how many bolts do each of the gods have? #Monsterdon

is Hercules gonna fight Mothra?

#monsterdon

This call to action could have been an e-mail to action. #monsterdon

"Oh Mothra, hear me..."

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

it's the Small Stonehenge from Spinal Tap

The mothra twins these guys aren't

#monsterdon #Hercules1985

It's the Italian sisters of the Mothra twins!

#monsterdon

Cool animated sunrise / bird, though

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985

I wonder what Hercules is up to #Monsterdon

Not quite passing the Bechdel-Wallace test so far.

#Monsterdon #TheAdventuresOfHercules1985

#monsterdon Ilya isn't dead, she went to a big beautiful farm upstate, to play with other greek heroines... a big happy farm, free range, lots of grass to chew. Moo.

OMG do I detect the barest semblance of a plot

#Monsterdon #Hercules1985