Thought it was a musical there for a minute. #monsterdon

What the fuck am I watching? People watching a boat drift by while someone noodles on a flute and keyboard? This movie loves the backs of people's heads so much it wrote a love them to them.
#Monsterdon #Tentacles

this crowd scene is moody af #monsterdon

Those clothes are a fire hazard.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

Is the boat race more of an expo that happens to take place late at night or something?

#monsterdon #tentacles

Me: What happened?
Writer: Fuck off
#monsterdon

It's wild, like, I *know* there's a plot happening here. If pressed, I could PROBABLY give you the broad strokes. But moment-by-moment? I got NOTHIN'. It's like a series of blank screens populated by mannequins. #Monsterdon

The sad Tentacles dirge. #Monsterdon

So. Many. Cigars.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

Wow, there really is *nothing* to do late at night in this town, is there?

#monsterdon

who are these people tho?

#monsterdon

i don't have any idea what the point of that scene was with everyone by the ocean all i know is that the soundtrack was the bomb. basically all the dialogue is just like choppy music, it contributes nothing to a sense of meaning only to an auditory ambiance #monsterdon

#Yankees lost to the Detroit Tigers, 2 to 3

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

What is going on? Why are all these people here? With this music?
#monsterdon

She'll be fine
#monsterdon

This harpsichord is making me think I'm playing a knock off Zelda game.

On the NES.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon Every time I hear the harpsichord, I imagine the octopus tip-toeing on the bottom of the ocean.

That was some very wonderful miniature work and Dave is happy. #Monsterdon

yes go back to the previous boat, the octopus will never return to the scene of its crimes

#monsterdon #Tentacles

I laughed at the harpsichord
#monsterdon

Was that a miniature ship? Do we have a proper kaiju movie on our hands?

#monsterdon #tentacles

The dummies are only _slightly_ less lifelike than the actors, print it

#monsterdon #Tentacles

It's a bobbing buoy! ✅

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonBingo

now

stupid question

but might that be a RADIO BUOY on the wreck? #monsterdon

Everyone. Is. Expendable. #Monsterdon

Sounds like an Air track.

#monsterdon

ok, that was some fun interleaving of model work with practical FX. Finally.

#monsterdon

What would be better if the monster were half octopus, half shark, you know? #monsterdon

#monsterdon What's the whole point of turner investigating when they kinda already know it's an octopus? Idk it's kinda boring.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

Henry Fonda only has time for 2 cameras. Deal with it.

#Monsterdon 🐙 🦑 🐙 🦑 😱

Shelley just gets one inexplicable costume after another, but I appreciate that she typically includes some kinda hat

OK get in the back of the truck we're heading to the boat launch to do some unaccompanied sailing in the open ocean

It wouldn't be the 1970s without child endangerment #Monsterdon

Seriously what IS this soundtrack? Did they just grab whatever instruments were left in the Lost and Found after the Philharmonic annual end-of-season bender or what? #Monsterdon

I want to see one of these Italian actresses with long tresses standing on a giant scallop shell instead of whatever they're making them do now #monsterdon

Yes, feed the octopus more yachts!

The orcas can help!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon she needs to GTFO

oh great now we got OWLS? #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Threatening to sue the reporter, claiming there’s “no scientific proof,” funded by a major company… we have Octopus Deniers!

@apLundell imagine if the octopus ate the life preservers and floated around on the surface like a cartoon character who tries to blow up a balloon but gets inflated instead and floats in the air

#monsterdon

@forestine @jonny I'm not convinced this move has a cast, usually you have to be doing something to count as acting #Monsterdon

GRAVEYARD OF THE TUNAS

Why aren't they floating at the surface, though

#Monsterdon

Need a little back beat with that high hat.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

“I’m thinking…”

“Great white?”

“Giant octopus.”

“I did not have that on my bingo card.”

#Monsterdon

@paco Those legs are surprisingly rigid for a recently-corpsed corpse.

#monsterdon #tentacles

didn't Fonda and Houston have a love/hate relationship?

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

"I just got my ass chewed out" is that a flex or an overshare #Monsterdon

The outfits just keep getting better and better.

#monsterdon

"Thank you so much for taking my boy on this trip."

Have a good time, Bait- BILLY! I mean Billy! #Monsterdon

Wow, Henry Fonda is just phoning this one in 😜

#Monsterdon

...as we approach our boat race conclusion? #monsterdon

#Monsterdon The Trojan company been using high frequency sound waves far above the legal limit!!

That actually sounds properly sciency.

@grumpasaurus I had assumed it was sonic, not EM. But ~movie logic~

#monsterdon #tentacles

you wanna try that line again? no? we're just gonna use that take? cool

#monsterdon

@jonny "The lead actors were American, while the supporting cast was mostly Italian." I think they are doing that thing where they have the Italian actors just speak Italian and then dub over them. They do this in multiple ripoffs of Jaws, actually like The Last Shark (1981) #Monsterdon

I don't know a ton about giant octopuses or dead bodies that have been cut in half. But I suspect they don't do this.

#Monsterdon

We're going to need a smaller boat*

#Monsterdon

* for this aquarium octopus to be able to wrap its tentacles around it

#monsterdon Yea idk what else to say other than they're all fucked.

a proper octopus attack FINALLY

i mean it wasn't great but still

#monsterdon

Only cephalopods i've ever seen were cuttlefish. I would never get in the ocean with Humboldt squids. About six feet in size and can be aggressive. #Monsterdon

This “Perils of Pauline” music is <chef’s kiss> #Monsterdon #tentacles

The octopus is paradin that guy around upside down, right?

#monsterdon #tentacles

#Monsterdon Got to admit the octopus model looks AWESOME.

… too bad it sank.

Man's feet ARE scary.
#Monsterdon

woulda been nice to see that guy getting ate but just imagine it i guess

#monsterdon

When the boat's a-rockin' .... it's because of a giant octopus! Run!

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

If this boats a rockin'.... #monsterdon #Tentacles

Is he....is he swimming with *shoes* on!?

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon Two fakeouts in a row. If I don’t see violence soon, I’ll provide some.

I like the fat guy, I don't know if he's supposed to be a villain or a buffoon or what

But you know what, the Italian 70s? I don't really need to see a character's whole dick in his swim shorts thanks

#Monsterdon

@strangefour You can tuna harpsichord, but you can't tuna fish...

#Monsterdon

Laughing so hard rn

#monsterdon

okay do not make jokes about the better movie in the shitty movie you are ripping off

#monsterdon #Tentacles

No, don't float on your back! From underneath, you look like a yacht!

#monsterdon

Octopus close ups. Yes!
It truly is the star of this movie.
#Monsterdon

The fuck? The octopus is just killing fish and standing them on their heads? Is this an insane serial killer cephalopod??
#Monsterdon #Tentacles

At this point, I appreciate the dialog-free diving sequences because I’m not obsessively watching anybody’s lips to see what language they were speaking originally. #monsterdon

Guys in the 70's really let it all hang out.

#monsterdon

Wow that jelly-roll is a star

#monsterdon

This movie is doing a good job of making me not care about any of the humans (except the baby). #Monsterdon

Why are they stuck?
#monsterdon

Undersea Vespa! #monsterdon

#monsterdon

@RobynGoodfellow the octopus is a _collector_

#monsterdon #Tentacles

Ah, the octopus has a dastardly plan to... glue fish to the bottom of the harbor?

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977

Okay so WTF with the fish. It's a killer octopus with OCD? #monsterdon #Tentacles

@Bluedepth ...uhm yeah nothing to do with 77 and that joke. #ducking #Monsterdon

okay

y'know what

the swordfish(?) stuck head-down into the seabed? _actually creepy_.

in a good movie this would be a good scene.

#monsterdon #Tentacles

Huh. Octopus is a remarkably avant-garde sculptor. #Monsterdon

Wow Chris Christie’s in this movie. As someone from New Jersey this makes me very proud. #Monsterdon

I wonder if they sank a scooter for this scene, or if they just found it out there while shooting.

#monsterdon

Are they letting all the air out of the harpsichord?

#monsterdon #tentacles

The unconventional use of that deck chair is the most interesting part of this #Monsterdon so far

Can't remember the name of her kid from her second husband? 🥴 That kid is definitely octobait.

#Monsterdon

it feels like an art installation. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon I don’t think making your submersible a convertible is Doing It Right.

um, are the face-in fish like a cult thing, or... #monsterdon

This movie started so fast. But now it's just people talking at each other about the ocean and how worried they are.
#monsterdon

@amyfou We have 3 distinct subplots. One set of people are doing nothing because of reasons. Another is doing nothing because of other reasons. And a third group has reasons why they're doing nothing. It's crystal clear. #monsterdon

the movie poster sold this as having more octopus than it does

#Monsterdon

Is this the Octopus's Garden we've been hearing so much about? #monsterdon #tentacles