...The film freezes as the gun goes off? Did this become a civil war documentary all of a sudden? #Monsterdon

btw so far i've only seenone Black person in this town and it was that cop.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977 Mr. Turner, the cops and the curly hair guy are having a classroom conference about the threat of a giant octopus, and the cops conclude (perhaps somewhat belatedly) that they need to stop the kids from sailing their tiny boats into the giant octopus area.

Mr. Turner concludes that the Octopus Must Be Destroyed, and asks if Curly Hair Guy can do it. It is a day of grim resolve.

Shelly Winters has a camera to catch a picture of the kaiju. #Monsterdon #Tentacles

Freeze Frame! Then bust into some giallo soundtrack music.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon so far, um I'm struggling with commentary because the movie is slow paced and boring. But I love it when characters do dumb shit. Lol.

characters start talking and my brain turns into homer simpsons brain with like a cartoon of a donkey playing in it instead of following what's being said

#monsterdon

Those belts, woah.

#monsterdon

i get that oceanside communities do lots of boat things because that's what is going on over there but surely they could hold of on a few of the boat things during the ocean killing season #monsterdon

#monsterdon Bitch ya husband ain't dead yet, you are lmaoooooo.

"...okay, you all just stand and look at the boat while Zamfir plays some flute"

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

#monsterdon seriously tho, idk Vicky went out there when she was against her husband going out there. Lol what?

So we just saw the girl die. Now the boat is coming in, people are gathered on the shore, and there's this love song playing. Fucking Wicker Man made more sense.

#monsterdon

OK WTF is up with this music. The vibe is ALL OVER THE PLACE.
#Monsterdon

people being killed by a giant octopus. that's all i wanted

was that so hard?

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Lorde went out to the ocean and said let there be Octopuses.

She's totally safe now.

#monsterdon

Lets hope she has her gold swimming certificate.

#monsterdon

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

And she's a terrible actress of course

#monsterdon

i do have to hand it to this movie for basically murdering every person who gets in the water on camera. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Where is the owl? The Owls Are Not What They Seem!!!

"We bought the WHOLE soundboard library, I'm going to USE the whole soundboard Library"

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977 The divers do some underwater science and conclude that the weird radio shit on the bottom of the ocean is making the fauna act strange, concluding that A Giant Octopus is responsible for this mischief.

Since the old radios are the Evil Business Guy's fault, Mr. Turner calls him about this finding and says "hold what you are doing is wrong, why do you do this thing?" (or something like that anyway).

Oh they ripped this bit right out of Jaws, they'll find a body inside the boat and it won't be scary

#monsterdon

#monsterdon This music is hilarious tho, lmao. It's unserious.

The first guy to get it right! Nobody will believe him.

#monsterdon

That's what you get for fatshaming! Octopus justice!

#Monsterdon

Okay, the legs straight up out of the water was actually pretty good. #monsterdon

Was that boat built by Boeing? #Monsterdon

since then, i haven't been able to enjoy pulpo en escabeche

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977 the mustachioed obese man, a less obese less mustachioed guy and a bikini girl from the boring pool party have appeared again, this time on a small motorboat.

Anyway, they go swimming and the smaller guy teases the larger guy, until an octopus gets bored of their nonsense and kills them. The bikini girl sees the other guy's legs floating upside down through the water and screams, then the octopus appears, fucks up her boat and eats her.

John Huston and Henry Fonda never spoke to each other, never saw each other in this whole movie, they both stipulated this in their contracts.

#monsterdon

A lot of these old boat movies were excuses to have a holiday, weren't they?
#monsterdon

And a tidal wave hits the coast

All because of one man
#monsterdon

#Monsterdon The Rubenesque fellow is dubbed in. His lips don’t match his words.

@Taweret

Octopi do not roar. Unless effected by radiation. Or The Stuff.

#Tentacles1977
#Tentacles #monsterdon

So this is how fish sleep.

#monsterdon

@brooke Shelly Winters read the script and said, "We're going to need a bigger hat"
#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Logitech controller spotted

#monsterdon I'm running out commentary lol.

Her mouth is confused

#monsterdon

Okay, lying on a chair *that* wrong is relatable.

#monsterdon #tentacles

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977 we cut to a pool party with the Mysterious Accent Girlfriend, an Obese Mustachioed Gentleman and some Bikini Babes. As far as I can tell, this scene did not advance the plot.

this movie is just watching random people have dull conversations and sometimes harpsichord

#monsterdon

Wait, we're not going to get sexy times? The music keeps teasing me.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #Tentacles1977 new sequence between curly hair guy, who is now shirtless but still has his giant goofy glasses and his Conventionally Attractive Girlfriend with a European Accent.

Anyway, he wants to go on a dive to solve the ocean mysteries and she doesn't want him to go because its too dangerous. He resolves to go anyway, because he lost two good friends to the sea.

She'd be happier if she had lots of candy to eat and a giant hat. I mean, seems to work for the other gal.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Lol she doesn't remember she sons name lol, So I don't feel to bad for not remembering characters lol.

The octopus, attracted by the walkie talky radio waves, reaches over and pulls off her hat by mistake, thus saving the kids.

#monsterdon

With these camera angles I feel like he's personally blaming me for the death of his two friends

#monsterdon

I have done scuba, one thing it is not is cheap
#monsterdon

OMG! In the very next scene, Tommy and Jamie have walkie-talkie radios!

We know what’s going to happen now!

#Monsterdon

These kids are literally just walking plot devices. #Monsterdon

@ricci They got an inkling #monsterdon

#Monsterdon
im sorry, it can't just be me

how is this family related? like in the fiction

❌ diving bell
✅ giant octopus enrichment toy

#monsterdon #tentacles1977

The child has some kind of giant 70s smart phone and I love it

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon "not a drinking man" he says, looking like he was dug out of a mausoleum

Scuba diving is SO much safer

#Monsterdon

"we're gonna go sailing in Mom's hat!" #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Italian sea elevators are unreliable.

okay

octopus looking through the porthole was cool

that was something

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Im trying not to fall asleep. It's entertaining enough though to keep me awake but I wanna see some action.

Ink attack, I like it

#Monsterdon

I *guess* that dive was short enough that it's no decompression, but coming up that fast seems risky.

#monsterdon #tentacles

Network cables! I knew it! We're hunting a Sysadmin! #monsterdon

I do like the fancy SCUBA gear, and the weird light quality makes me wonder if they're actually at something near the 29 fathoms they mentioned. Or if it's just a filter.

#monsterdon #tentacles

Octopus apparently hates electronics. Must be a Luddite. #Monsterdon

@Newpa_Hasai @lorgonumputz hell, he's carrying the whole movie! He's the real hero! #Monsterdon

The movie used the term "broads." Pretty sure we won't pass the Bechdel test on this one. 🙄

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

(milhouse fireworks factory meme) when are they gonna get to the octopus?!

#monsterdon

I did not check doesthewhaledie dot com

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

(*Orcas plotting)

#monsterdon

@wohali @Taweret they only had the budget for 140 harpsichord notes across the whole movie, so they had to be sparing

#monsterdon

I choose to believe octopus is moodily playing the harpsichord at the bottom of the sea #monsterdon

I'd love to know what made Henry Fonda and John Huston appear in this movie, was it Drink? Was it Drugs? Was it a Divorce?

#monsterdon

i wonder what the octopus is up to

#monsterdon

Hmm. More fat jokes
#monsterdon

Why is John Huston in this movie, did they threaten his family or something?

#monsterdon

It was the style to hit hard right at the start with some of these 70s horror / crime films

#monsterdon

Aw drat, missing #monsterdon tonight. Evening too busy to get our snark in gear.

oh I see, we're gonna have HARPSICORD QUEUED violence #monsterdon

WHO DO I GOTTA THANK AT @internetarchive for "webamp"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Also holy crap the reason why the reporter seemed so familiar is because it was played by JOHN HUSTON. How. His was some of the only actual acting so I guess that checks out.

@apLundell My theory is that the original plan for the movie involved the octopus attacking more people on the shore, but then they had to scrap that after the octopus puppet sank. It might explain why they set up all these non-oceangoing characters and then dropped them partway through.

#monsterdon #tentacles1977

#Monsterdon what do you mean 'is it okay if my calamari was mangled with puppets'
what kind of restaurant is this

It sure was weird how the monster started by attacking a child on land, but then deescalated to only attacking people already in the ocean.

What an odd way to tell a story.

#Monsterdon

@SnoopJ

No. The only good thing about this terrible movie is we all suffered together.

#Monsterdon #Tentacles

Well, crap. My @mastoscore bot did a terrible job parsing #monsterdon toots. I have lots of bugs to fix. :sadcatstarry:

Better luck next time... Sorry for the people who got kinda pointlessly tagged...

For those just coming in on this timeline, we have just (finally) finished another Sunday’s #Monsterdon. As you go farther back you’ll see lots of quite silly movie commentary. Feel free to (a) filter out the #Monsterdon hashtag, (b) mute me as long as you feel necessary, and/or (c) keep an eye on #MonsterdonAlert for the next opportunity to join in!

@ricci More reasons people are hating on Boomers now #monsterdon

@CactuarJoe @Taweret less than you'd think given that absolutely nothing happened except for an amazing hat which has special exemption to stay in my brain

#monsterdon #Tentacles

anyway thanks to @Taweret for hosting this thing I am diligently scrubbing from my brain xD

#monsterdon #Tentacles

@r343l @Atreyu @Infoseepage I'm kind of picturing what you're citing, but after a night's sleep I'm sure I'm going to forget all about that scene #monsterdon

We now return #tentacles to their rightful owners. The hentai fans. May they have happier waters than we did. #Monsterdon

I decided this was a full star below "Horror Express," so perfect for insuring that #monsterdon continues to trend

@gwozniak So uh this song title is amazing, because said friend's pissing is in fact brought up in the movie, and said friend also DIES

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon did we ever even find out what nefarious experiments Trojan corp was doing? it's clear they didn't intentionally disturb the giant octo so what was their deal? and why do I care?

@ramsey @blogdiva Yes! He was helping his buddy survive while he cleared the fallen coral to free his buddy, while the buddy's orcas Summer and Winter were keeping the octopus away (and then killing it). Then all FOUR of them went off to have more sea adventures together! All to an amazing soundtrack. Note: Due to a household emergency I had to deal with, I only caught minutes 43-55 and then the last 20 minutes of the movie. But that's how I saw it! #Monsterdon #Tentacles