"A place where people go without repentance"
"Mar-a-Lago?"
#monsterdon

Get fucked, d-bags! #monsterdon

Cat's on the organ again. #Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

put too much in the razor blade budget, has regrets

#Monsterdon

Oh no! Falling to a poorly green screened death!

#Monsterdon

"Well, fuck that! I'm not getting up."

#Monsterdon

Hell yeah

#Monsterdon

HELL!!! #monsterdon

It would have been much worse in a modern remake, now that all razors have 6+ blades #monsterdon

Goodness, that crypt monk chewed so much scenery. And so the sinners fuck off into … the heck! #monsterdon

#Monsterdon🏛️💀🔪🪞💝🧙😱

and they're all going to be just fine in the end!

Death by a thousand cuts

#Monsterdon

Bon appetit.

#monsterdon #talesfromthecrypt

"Now you may go. The tour is over. Thank you and come again."

#Monsterdon

Shane had a nice meal. Good doggie.
#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

The dog humped his leg and blackout.
Is it over now?
#Monsterdon

Yes let's all go jump in the pit of lava ASAP

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCryptmas

0exp kinda death, punked his ass #monsterdon

Is this the sort of product placement you want Barret razor blades?

#monsterdon #monsterdonsavesChristmas #talesfromTheCrypt

see they just made it tasty for Shane, why not! #monsterdon

And justice is served! #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Following the maze was a sucker move.

He should have tried to smash it open before he got to the trap.

THIS ONE DELIVERED
#monsterdon

Dang, this is an elaborate death trap

#Monsterdon

@surdfish oooh nice I see what you did there

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCryptmas

Nasty

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

Uhh.. where did they get 5000 razor blades?

It's Major Rogers brand Scooby Snacks!

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt

#Monsterdon🏛️💀🔪🪞💝🧙😱

very pointy squeeze chute

What a tough soldier you are, Major.

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

Maybe stop touching the wall you twat.

#Monsterdon

Scoring the meat is often an important first cooking step.

#monsterdon #talesfromthecrypt

Oh it does get pretty narrow. #Monsterdon

No!

#Monsterdon

What's the deal, is the Major visually impaired now too so he has to feel his way along? #monsterdon

@nazokiyoubinbou

Being blind enhances all of their reflexes - like building?

#Monsterdon

THIS IS MY RAZOR-LINED HABITRAIL

IT WAS MADE FOR ME

#monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

Oh he'll eat, alright. #Monsterdon #TalesfromtheCrypt 🪦🧟

#monsterdon #monsterdonsavesChristmas #talesfromTheCrypt

Wow they must be really cranky.

I just have to point out that this guy is sighted. He can, you know, look and, you know, NOT put his hand on the razors. (At least right now.)

#Monsterdon

I like the "cut" of their jib :D #monsterdon

This is not OSHA approved
#monsterdon

do not the razor blade hallway! #monsterdon

Ooooh. That razorblade lining of the hallway is nasty!
#Monsterdon

if they're feeding the shithead to the dog that's just as bad as doing something directly to the dog and I'm not liking this one

#monsterdon

@allanb Seriously! I was expecting poetic justice, we got half poetic justice/half saw knock-off #monsterdon

Dude, don’t walk down it. Be patient, and pull the razors out of the wall

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon @devilgirlbot good bot

Now how did blind people install all those razor blades without getting hurt?
#Monsterdon

British Steel

#Monsterdon

What's with the razor maze? #monsterdon

Vicious catsup wound #monsterdon

Where did they find so many razor blades?

#Monsterdon

Uh. Wow. That's all razors, no safety. #Monsterdon

Guess we know where the blanket budget went. #Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

#monsterdon "At least feed my dog, please!"

"...he'll be fed alriiiight..."

Oh good, that's a relief. Now I can sleep

The dog does not die at this time. #monsterdon

No animals were mildly distressed in the making of this film
#monsterdon #monsterdonsavesChristmas #talesfromTheCrypt

Oh, the plot can progress now?
#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

They've made him a labyrinth! #Monsterdon

Did they literally just build a hallway? How is that better than beating the crap out of him with their bare hands? #Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

Oh they made him a habitrail, how nice!

#monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

#monsterdon

Dude, you don't deserve a dog! #Monsterdon #TalesfromtheCrypt 🪦🧟

Are they building the thunder dome out there?
#Monsterdon

"I see", said the blind carpenter, as he picked up his hammer and saw.

#Monsterdon

This is like the most twisted episode of the A-Team. WIthout any explosions.
#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

@cmdln That's what I was thinking too #monsterdon

@paco "and then the blind man picked up his hammer and saw"

#monsterdon

Interestingly, this isn't the "Tales from the crypt" I thought it would be. But no regrets, still a pretty good movie. :)

#Monsterdon #tailsfromTheCryp1972

"You will see..."

#Monsterdon

ooooo proper creaky door

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCryptmas

He's about to learn Ramsay Bolton's lesson

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

Blind guy says, "you'll see". That's funny, right? #Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

Seriously though, if that dog doesn’t shut up…

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

I won't say it. I won't say he's in the dog house. I can't do that...

Nigel later regretted volunteering to be the blind guy working the saw.
#monsterdon

@lorgonumputz

Neither do I, but I've got my Etsy account ready!

#Monsterdon

Why must the blind patients be the bad guys?

#Monsterdon

Le Arf! Le Arf #monsterdon

"And worst of all, I have to pee"

#Monsterdon

I have absolutely no idea what they are building.

#Monsterdon

It's a dog, not a cat, I don't think the dog would go for the body of his person? But then again I don't have a dog so no first hand experience here.

#Monsterdon

“I know, Major Rogers, sir”

CHILLS!!!

#Monsterdon

Oh so there's where we're going
#monsterdon

oh shit did I call it? :D #monsterdon

ah. he'll go wild, will he.

#monsterdon

@Taweret Um hm... I'd like to hire them for... something. #Monsterdon #TalesfromtheCrypt 🪦🧟

🎶 Wallace & Gromit rocket-building theme 🎶

#Monsterdon

He took a kettle, large and new,
fit for the deed he had to do.

#Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

#monsterdon Ever wonder why the blind carry white sticks?

Turns out they're weapons to use against the sighted.

@flowerpot Perhaps the structure was repurposed #monsterdon

Walk softly and carry a big stick, I guess.

#Monsterdon

these old guys are pretty well organized. good for them.

#monsterdon

These dudes are awesome
#monsterdon

This all seems a bit involved when clearly the ironic punishment is to train Shane to be a guide dog and then blind the superintendent. #Monsterdon #TalesFromTheCrypt1972

All that enhanced senses rubbish is undermining my sympathy. Are they setting them up to acquire magic powers?

#Monsterdon

Measure zero times, cut once #monsterdon

Y’all, you’d better not leave the dog in there!!!! I know Major Rogers deserves whatever he has coming, but that doggo was just being a good boy!

#Monsterdon

They picked up their hammer and saw

#monsterdon
#TalesFromTheCrypt