#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

Chris Plummer just rolled his eyes

This is so bad, and its vibe kisses the edges of the Star Wars Holiday Special,
but clearly, holds its own class of stupid

#monsterdon

Faster pussycat! Kill Kill!

#monsterdon

Count! Beware, for we have the power of the ZOOM! You are doomed!

#Monsterdon

@gnomon Reminds me of the coffins in the Dracula, Prisoner of Frankenstein movie #monsterdon

#monsterdon Anyone keeping count? I lost track at like Wilhelm number 35 during that fight sequence.

@apLundell I really did search for a good GIF for this, but one doesn’t seem to exist. I’ll need to create one of Graham Chapman walking down the stairs and singing.

#Monsterdon

Those golden boarding-pod piercing missiles just smashing through plate glass and then being sprung open by two soldiers hunkered down in each one like over-boiled hot dogs are, admittedly, charming and hilarious.

(Sorry, I completely tuned out of where this sequences fits into the chronology of the movie like five minutes ago. It's still going on. Eventually, I have to assume, it will stop.)

#monsterdon

i think the space battle would be much more exciting if it made any sense

#monsterdon

"Kill them? But.... I thought this was just Lazer Tag!" #monsterdon

@Taweret I sense a remix that needs to happen

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

so the main chars are watching this battle on a big tv?

the bad flashing started right as i was super interested in the hand ship that opens and closes so that was not great. turned my brightness down #Monsterdon

@SordidAmok Space Emperors are always benevolent it’s a Space Rule #Monsterdon

Space hand!

#monsterdon

you can tell Zarth is in charge because he walks around the battle yelling KILL #monsterdon

I swear ta god I saw a string above that spaceship. #monsterdon

“I must obey Destiny” is that the name of his domme?
#Monsterdon

These landing craft have an interesting design #monsterdon

FASTER, HOFFICAT!

KILL!

KILL!

#monsterdon #starcrash

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

those flying tubes are ...

also anatomical

You bitch about whooshing spaceships, but may I remind you that in "Jaws: The Revenge" the fucking shark *growled.*

#Monsterdon

SPACE HAND CAN MAKE A FIST!
#Monsterdon #StarCrash

KILL KILL
#monsterdon

#Monsterdon love the boarding pods

nevermind the vacuum of space

Watching the battle on TV, as commanders do

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

the explosions in this movie are very sparkly

Not ending the movie with "Stop the flow of time" was a decision.

#Monsterdon

I, what? how did the emperor's troops get on the count's ship?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

Oh no that hand ship thing is amazing

#monsterdon #starcrash

Again Stella changed her outfit
What a great stock she has.
#monsterdon

pew pew
#monsterdon

All the pew-pews.

#Monsterdon

Evil dude missed his laughing cue, didn't he?
#Monsterdon

@gnomon It's so if a ship gets captured, the adversaries have to spend a long time poring over the manuals to find out how to operate anything #monsterdon

SUNSET? my insane mother fucker you are IN OUTER SPACE where the fuck is the sun setting my dude
#monsterdon

I’m sorry, but I think only He-Man is allowed to call himself the “Master of the Universe.”

#Monsterdon

it's always sunset somewhere

in spaaaaaaaaaaaaace

#monsterdon #starcrash

Ok. Hit play now.

#Monsterdon

All of these people have more random-ass powers than Silver-Age Superman

#monsterdon #starcrash

@Louisa or they could give them the disintegration beam gun that the other robot seemed to have! why isn't everyone using those all the tiem!?!?!? #monsterdon

@Lazarou It would feel wrong to have anything in this movie done competently

#Monsterdon

@nev Too bad that interview didn't cover his role as the giant brain in the American dub of Gandahar

#Monsterdon

Great maniacal laughter but I don’t get what’s so funny, Count Zarth Arn #Monsterdon

Did she just check out the emperors butt?
#monsterdon

Costume change for Stella

#Monsterdon

akton... you were never lesser than the emperor... you were not less worthy of life! you never need permission to live!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon
Smoke from exploding planet is falling for some reason.

ajksefkjhasdfkjhasdfkjlasdfkjl;

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

Director: "Ok Acton.This is your big death scene. We need emotion. Remember that face you made when she had miraculously been brought to life? Just do that one again."
#monsterdon

"48 seconds" is the new "Alas Babylon" code phrase

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1979

“An hour goes by quickly” this one didn’t
#Monsterdon

“In the space of a few minutes, every molecule on this planet will stop.”

So, you’re setting the thermostat down -459.67℉?

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon There's still twenty minutes to go.

[cue Red Dwarf theme]

#monsterdon #starcrash

@jonny fuck that means it will never end #monsterdon

Tough actin` Akton.
"Human like friend." Like? Like a friend? That was a bizarre sentence.
#Monsterdon #StarCrash

Robots Vs. Skeletons would be set in a ruined NYC. There would be people - ragged starving people hiding in the debris. They would get killed occasionally, by accident. It would have no plot. Just stop motion robots and skeletons fighting.

#monsterdon

You see, the green ray also halted the advancement of the plot too.

#monsterdon #starcrash

The somehow non-infringing light-sword returns. #monsterdon

IMPERIAL BATTLESHIP, HALT THE FLOW OF TIME

OH OKAY Arngeir knows the Slow Time Shout? Looks like he picked up an extra fourth word of it though?

#Monsterdon

HALT THE FLOW OF TIME is the best emperor command ever. But how does it work for the emperor and his peeps?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1979

Halt the flow of time!

#Monsterdon

Halt. The Flow. Of Time!

#monsterdon

If McCurlylocks sparkles out when he dies... LOL

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

#Monsterdon I want a Time Stop ray.

wow okay

superman's stuck in orbit now I guess

for three minutes

#monsterdon #starcrash

TIME PARADOX!

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1978

@jivens I use this every day at work after 2pm #Monsterdon

I assume this is Akton becoming One with the Force

I mean Destiny

or space-something

who even knows anymore

#Monsterdon

I have a couple ideas for projects that would just be two sides engaged in endless pointless war. For the absurdity.

#monsterdon

time to return to the disco dimension #monsterdon

Space Brando: STELLAAAAAA! #monsterdon

Is everybody else able to tell Marjoe and David apart? Maybe everyone in the 80s had this hairstyle and they just didn't tell me. 🤷‍♂️

#Monsterdon #StarCrash

poor Akton is doomed because he has a lil cut on his shoulder

#monsterdon

Christopher Plummer looked devastated to remember he's the Hoff's father. #Monsterdon

"you've never died before, so you can't die now" ironclad logic #monsterdon

#Monsterdon five minutes ago you were telling the robot *he* was your bff, girl. get off your high horse

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

"I'm no longer useful at this time" <-- Akton and me, tbh

AKTON DO NOT LISTEN TO THE COP IN YOUR HEAD

#monsterdon

Oh dear, the stop-motion robots that are clearly actually there with the actors. #monsterdon

Ah, yes, the completely disabling slight arm wound #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

Hoff makes duck face when he laser sword fights

Here's the machines that go wibble wobble wibble wobble wibble wobble. #monsterdon

Preprogrammed computers? When the hell was this written 1950?

#monsterdon Hoff's fencing seems pretty convincing

Why do the guards have blasters, but the robots have swords?

#monsterdon

The golems remembered to use swords with cortosis weave, right?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

@gnomon StalaCtite, that C's in there for the Ceiling. StalaGmite, the G's there for coming from the Ground. #Monsterdon #StarCrash But I thought they were icicles.

Stella Star just pouting instead of helping the two guys fighting the robot.....

#Monsterdon

Ah, a nice trade Hoff #Monsterdon

Why does McCurlylocks know where all this stuff is and what it all does?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

“These outfits will never get by the censors.”
“No problem, we’ll just have Stella wear a plastic bag for half the movie.”
#Monsterdon

This antagonist is darth vadar hit with a train-spotting vaudevillian??
#monsterdon #starcrash1979

#Monsterdon 🌟 💫 💥 🚀 🍮 😱

the director apparently also required the villain to aspirate EVERY /t/, without exception.

So the bad guy is going to destroy his own command center?
#monsterdon

an hour goes by quickly.. except while watching this movie.

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1979

I'll evilly laugh myself out of the chamber... but NO FURTHER

#monsterdon

This antagonist is very, uh. Giggly.

#monsterdon

What if Mr. Yuck and Mr. Clean had a baby? And what happened to that guy?

#monsterdon

The director said to the makeup artist: “More Eye Liner, Dammit!” And they obliged.
#Monsterdon