This was released around Thanksgiving, which is odd. According to IMDB the budget was $25 Million and the worldwide gross was $1.5 Million. #monsterdon

*kid has an entire conversation with a glowing sentient volleyball that apparently has the power to restore damaged hearing*

Wait, is this where Castaway (2000) got that idea!?

#monsterdon

I mean you found it underwater, so

#Monsterdon

First call! First call for alcohol, kids

#Monsterdon

After escaping the illegal rollerderby game, Rainbow Hat wanders through the rust factory and finds a cave, which has a pool and inside the pool he finds a glowing orb. We learn that he was deaf but the orb healed him and talks to him when he holds.

We can't hear what the orb says, we just hear the kid talking to him. The Orb's name is Bodai for some reason.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

...were the headphones supposed to be hearing aids?

#Monsterdon #SolarBabies1986

#AltSportingEvents
#HashtagGames
#Monsterdon

Post apocalypse roller skate lacrosse.

Okay now that you can hear, please don't make that high pitch squeak again?
#monsterdon

Kind of surprising to have a character I like this early in a #monsterdon movie

Orb is best described as:

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

Is it that sphere from Sleeper

#Monsterdon

@Taweret Oh, gosh, I hated those!

#Monsterdon

I wonder how many movies have used abandoned mines for facile location shooting of some adventure or sci-fi flick #Monsterdon
oh shit kid's found a palantir. DON'T LOOK IN IT

Alright lets do attendance:
Glowing MacGuffin?
Present.
Child prodigy savior?
Present.
#monsterdon

The evil general turns out to be an evil cop. Then some cop cars that look like trimaran versions of the race car piece in monopoly show up to arrest the roller derby teams for doing illegal rolling sports.

But there's a twist! The evil general is actually the sponsor of the Evil Team (TM) and was mad that they were losing to the Good Team (TM), which makes him look bad, so after the other players run away he stops to berate them for losing.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

🎵 Se-cret tunnel! Se-cret tunnel! Through the mount-ain... 🎵

#monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

I feel like the cravat is telling us he's not a nice fellow.
#monsterdon

Nooo! Not the little kid!!

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Imperial Stormtroopers also had this accuracy problem. It happens to all men, of a certain age. Awwww...

Two teams of roller derby boys roll out to challenge each other; they are the Good Team (TM), who dress captain america, and the Evil Team (TM), who dress like Count Binface. The Evil team leader wants to cheat and the good team leader wants to not cheat. An evil dystopian general has also showed up to watch the roller derby game. There is also I guy with a bird for some reason.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

E-COPS!

They're all on Ecstasy, they just want to dance and hug!

#Monsterdon

Circular roller night lacrosse is not a crime!
#monsterdon

It's the fuzz! Cheese it!

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

I didn't really think I'd have to play Rollerball, though 😬

#Monsterdon

This movie takes place in the future. The world is a desert and the water is controlled by... some dystopian thing. It takes place in an orphanage. Everyone rollerblades everywhere.

We start and there's a kid sneaking into an abandoned rust factory to watch a roller hockey game; a spider scares him. He wears a rainbow bicycle helmet so I will call him Rainbow Hat.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

Circular roller night lacrosse, this truly is the apocalypse, I need no further convincing.
#monsterdon

I hope Rob Halford sings something

#Monsterdon

@SnoopJ

"Vassili... we must give this American a wide berth."

"Extra wide. He's got a butt like Trump."

#Monsterdon

ACAB includes the guy I assume must be the Warden

#monsterdon

Why didn’t any other post-apocalyptic films have “future lacrosse”???

* Except Rollerball

#monsterdon #solarbabies1986

I swear I played a version of this in 1987....

#Monsterdon

THE ROLLER-HOCKEY-LACROSSE SENESCHAL HAS A PET OWL

#monsterdon

water may be scarce, but spraypaint is clearly abundant in the distant future of 41

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

IT IS THE AFTERTIMES,
ROLLERBLADE WHEELS AND PRESCRIPTION CORRECTIVE LENSES ARE STILL AVAILALBE,
BUT LIFE IS HARD
#monsterdon

this is fabulous....

#Monsterdon

Waterworld is just wet Mad Max. Everyone know that

#monsterdon #solarbabies1986

It's good he's got headlights on his skates, otherwise he could hit a deer and ruin his windscreen. #Monsterdon

My eyes are hurting, how many layers of dissolve are we looking at here.

#monsterdon

The year is 41?
I don't appreciate your cheap method of escaping choosing a year for your film.
#monsterdon

I blame Maurice Jarre

#monsterdon

Let’s go babies

#monsterdon #solarbabies1986

I can see why Mel Brooks put his hard earned cash into this venture....

SOLARBABIES!

#Monsterdon

20th Century Fox! Gotta be one of my favourite foxes.

#monsterdon

Well the soundtrack is off to a... strong choice.
#monsterdon

AAAAIGH, they're chuckin' credits at us! #Monsterdon

@saucerlost They're made from fish tobacco. Obviously. #monsterdon

long live bodhi
#monsterdon #solarbabies

#Monsterdon
The premise is kinda all over, but honestly? Decent dialogue, decent pacing, perfectly acceptable acting... There are new releases that are worse than this.

I don't think I've ever seen waterworld before. I've seen parts of it. How does it compare with The Postman?

(controversial opinions are ok..?)

#monsterdon

@apLundell I was hoping that the surgical alterations was about turning prisoners into guard-beasts.

But, they just dropped that and left it lying on the floor.

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

#monsterdon melodically ripping off Pat Benatar's Invincible a little bit

@mxchara there's often an unofficial second film shown on @miru, yea.

#Monsterdon

Were they called Solarbabies because Waterbabies was already taken? #monsterdon #Solarbabies

I have seen it ages ago and I see why I didn’t remember much of it: I was struggling to forget all this time! #solarbabies Thanks #monsterdon :blobdisapproval:

Bodhi. He will always be with us.

Heh. hehehe... Heh

purple glow tickles

THE END

Water is free now and so are we.

Except my ears. From this awful music.

Anyways this residential school in Max Max world with an Elliot from ET boy kinda works I guess. Thanks for the shiny purple #Monsterdon selection @Taweret !

#monsterdon That litttle synth sound before the roto-toms going "BOOoooooo...." That's the grandad of the Elastica "BOOOooooool" sound effect.

Ferociously torn apart by your own dogs. Wow. THAT'S a Monday!

#Monsterdon

So Bodhi fucked off into space? What was any of this for?

#monsterdon

The plot pursued but the writers were faster! Still, the glowy orb effects were top shelf. Kind of difficult to riff when there's not much to grab onto though.

Thank you for hosting @Taweret. I hope everyone has a great week!

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

Solarbabies 2: Electric Orbaloo

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

"Follow ... follow ... follow ... free ... free ... free" Inspirational lyrics.

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

@annathepiper 👌 IT STINKS #Monsterdon

@Lazarou

Trotskyism: helluva drug!

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

Not gonna lie, this is my favorite kind of #monsterdon movie. I had a blast.

Solange Knowles got her showbiz start on this movie #Monsterdon #Solarbabies

🎶POLE-VAULT HE-RO🎵

#Monsterdon

Thank you as always, @Taweret for bringing us a messianic orb to ponder. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Join us soon for Solar Babies II: The Time Walkers

Man this movie was incredibly 80's.

#Monsterdon

Charles Durning?? Smokey Robinson?? The '80s were a bleak decade for talent previously held in high regard, huh #Monsterdon #Solarbabies

#monsterdon I suppose now we could be done with the Eco mode, and maybe try Normal mode, or god forbid, Sport mode.

I'm sorry, performed by SMOKEY ROBINSON?

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

I badly wish that the writing lived up to the sets/costumes, but then we wouldn't have put this on monsterdon if it had.

#Monsterdon #SolarBabies1986

Closing credits song slaps.

#Monsterdon

Sure hope no one needed all that water that just flowed out into the desert. Oh well.

Thanks @Taweret for hosting!

#Monsterdon

Smokey Robinson? I'm so sorry, sir. You deserved better than this film. #Monsterdon

Wow, that was a lot

#Monsterdon #SolarBabies

Oh hey, they fuck off into the ocean in the credits

#Monsterdon #SolarBabies1986

That sucked. Thanks for the company #monsterdon ers. Take care. See ya soon.

✊✊✊✋✊✋

...👋

"Don't tease him, it's his first wave."

#Monsterdon

"and that's why they were called solarbabies"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon But not without leaving our heroes with significant hallucinogens.

Not the worst miniature dam burst. Being at night helps a lot.
#monsterdon

These kids have accepted Bodhi as their personal savior #Monsterdon

Okay, now he's left you. You just said it 90 seconds too soon.

#monsterdon

@klu9 My cats are always saying this.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

"He's all around us"

Then instantly contracts back to orb size with a sickening squelch.

#Monsterdon #SolarBabies

"The water is free again" to seep away into the desert. Great job. #monsterdon

🦖 MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ TRIVIA THAT BURNS ☀️👶

REVIEWS!!
"This pic rips off everything from Cool Hand Luke to Dune to Rollerball to Logan's Run to The Warriors and still comes up dry."

- Steven H. Scheuer, Movies on TV

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

FREE SKY WATER, as @WEATHERISHAPPENING might say.

#monsterdon #SolarBabies

@Taweret Look! Water is free now!

Oh, looks like it all flowed out to the ocean.

#monsterdon

Gratuitous dam failure! The water is free, and Bodhi is glowing, glowing ... gone!

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

I'll give this movie exactly one (1) thing: this is I think the first time I've seen a bad guy lair explode into _water_ rather than _fire_.

#monsterdon

Surf's up, buckaroos!

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies

Oh DAMN!

#monsterdon #solarbabies1986

Okay, so one bad guy is dead, but when are they gonna KILL THE FUCKING OWL KILLER?

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

#Monsterdon I sure hope that dam wasn't holding a drinking reservoir for a major population center.

well of course the damn explodes....

#Monsterdon

Family-themed movie decided to go for excessive violence as a solution.

#Monsterdon #Solarbabies1986

Bingo! Counting Terminac vs. Grock as Monster vs. Monster #monsterdon #monsterdonbingo