I'm joining a militia just for the puffy vest and huntin' hat

#Monsterdon

How'n the fuck did little monkey climb without use of his legs? I'm honestly concerned for the werewolf, it's gonna be fighting this kid‽

"Has anybody seen my son, Brady?" <cop drags a bloody kite>

OH that darmned kite-eating tree has got another one! When will Charlie Brown do something?

"Eh aaugh ah aaaugh!" guy mourns like me pulling a splinter.
#monsterdon #silverBullet

OH: did Stephen King hate rural people?

#Monsterdon

edit: Stephen (not Steven) King

The cops are reacting to the third mystery death by saying they are working on it, and the townspeople are reacting by buying and selling shotguns. The main characters are reacting by flying kites and climbing trees.

#monsterdon

Professional wrestling will not save this guy from the werewolf. No sir.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

Jokes, beers, lecturing

This is my three-pronged approach to Monsterdon victory

#Monsterdon

OH, her dad's a Republican. This is a scary movie!

(I have seen it, but it's been, uh, 42 years?)

Those stair motors freak me out after Gremlins, but seriously, put his bedroom on the ground floor.

#monsterdon #silverBullet

note: being cogent does not mean he is being reasonable

#monsterdon

@CardboardRobot
The werewolf is like... um... a cleansing fire.

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Busey drinks because he's seen things. Werewolfy things.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

So they cleaned up Gary Busey for this pic?

#Monsterdon

That chair lift should come with a crossword puzzle… #Monsterdon

the full on nightmare of Gary Busey lurching over to kiss your cheek

I'd take bear

#Monsterdon

Awww this is wholesome. No wait what's the opposite of wholesome?

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

check the driver's bullshit level?!?!?!

#monsterdon

"Electrocute the Cripples to balance the budget" finally a political platform for these trying times.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

@Taweret I'd expect property (land/car) taxes in this case, so yes actually!

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

Okay these two guys are fighting in public but $20 says they make out later.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

"We pay these taxes to keep our town safe!

"YOUR town!"

#monsterdon

@SRLevine Maybe you get sent to the Medium Place

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

I feel like a werewolf should just LEAP onto the roof. Climbing up the trellis seems a little unimpressive.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

Every person we have met so far is a either turd or a victim

#Monsterdon

Before paternity tests "it ain't mah bahbey" was the pinnacle of scientific evidence. #monsterdon

Judy Blume's Silver Bullet

#Monsterdon

Ah - and Canada's well-known Megan Follows. No Green Gables here.

#monsterdon

This is what the 80s ACTUALLY looked like, kids

#monsterdon #silverbullet1985

Heads are gonna roll....

#monsterdon

Midnight, time to get this railway work done

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

That's not Gary Busey, that's the Moon!

#Monsterdon

Here I am for my very first #Monsterdon because I am a sucker for Stephen King

I have to admit; this one shocked me! Feels a little high-brow for #monsterdon, but hey, there's a monster in it, so it qualifies, I guess. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet #StephenKing 🐺🎥🍿

@ryan where did you find this? How did you find this?
I almost feel like sharing/inflicting this on people. But I dunno when I would have the opportunity.
#Monsterdon #WrongFrogs

@paco @ryan I dunno, but I had to stop watching. I should probably find out how to do drugs so I can truly appreciate it.

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonDoubleFeature

@CactuarJoe @Taweret this is the dream of Anarchism, no cops and dead eyeless were-priests!

#Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe Nah, this one was fine. there are definitely worse horrors awaiting us this year in the #monsterdon lineup.

@catzilla @rebeld

On the upside, they presumably got to see werewolf wiener.

------------

This toot is a reaction to the Monsterdon livestream playing right now at https://miru.miyaku.media ! You can mute the #Monsterdon hashtag to silence these toots from me.

"Okay, we need you to write the end credits song for a movie called Silver Bullet."

"Cool cool, what's it about?"

"Uh... a kid with like, a fast wheelchair or something? I have no idea."

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

oh wow, this ending theme. oh. ouch.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

After playing "catch the gun while not getting werewolf-mobbed" for a little bit, Marty catches the bullet and shoots the Wolfpriest in the other eye. He turns into a hairy naked guy, then into a naked guy, then appears dead, but then goes "woooaarrrgggh!" and pops up screaming until he falls back down, probably dead.

Marty makes a joke about not being able to walk and then is like "I love you jane" and jane is like "I love you marty" then piano music and credits!

#monsterdon

"Joke! I'm disabled! lol!"

#Monsterdon

snout retracts like a frighten penis

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Of course, this means there will be a naked priest in their house. A hilarious change of pace from how it usually is…

"Ow! My other eye! Why did you shoot my other eye with this spray-painted bullet? It really stings like crazy!"

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

@miru Another classic Stephen King trope is the unstable person who believes the kids.

#Monsterdon

WAIT WAIT. We've confirmed that the moon doesn't control his transformation. BUT we're going to assume that silver bullets still work???? #monsterdon

@CactuarJoe PLAY BALL

#monsterdon

The uncle takes the necklace to the elves, meaning an "old world craftsmanship wizard" in a shop, who reforges it into Anduril, the flame of the west... i mean... um... a silver bullet.

#monsterdon

🫡 📺

#monsterdon

"And we were taking no chances. Which is why we made exactly one goddamn bullet."

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

I'm getting 5 and 6 ads every scene change. It may be even worse than Tubi!

#Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe tsuki ni kawatte AROOOOO

#monsterdon

HE SAID IT! HE SAID THE THING!

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

I reckon he got bit by a radioactive wolf

#monsterdon

not the worst werewolf transformation we've seen, 6/10

#Monsterdon

all I know is sneaking around an American's property at night is a good way to get shot

#Monsterdon

He broke into the premises because he had paw-bible cause

#Monsterdon

@jivens #monsterdon

I wanna see the next shot of The Wolf with a huge cross around his neck

Ooh what if there's TWO werewolves?!? The reverend and the Sherrif? All of the pillars of society are werewolves.

mayor? Werewolf.
Town doctor? Werewolf.

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Marty escapes the Ecclesiastical Wolfcar but then runs out of gas and so hides in a covered bridge. As he's trapped there, the priest wanders in to threaten Marty and explains that he had to kill the one girl he killed because she was going to kill herself and that would send her to hell. No explanation for the wolf other murders though.

#monsterdon

"Look Uncle Red let's just compromise and you can strap some harpoon guns on my wheelchair and we'll call it a day."

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

@CactuarJoe #Monsterdon #SilverBullet #StephenKing 🐺🎥🍿

yeah, shut up, marty

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

"You medling little shit!" How every old man who had to deal with Scooby Doo felt.
#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

Tractor ex machina. Wait that seems redundant

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

"the other people, I just killed them cuz I was super hungry"

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Has there been a full moon every single night in this film? #monsterdon

this is an r rated movie but some of it seems so aimed at kids

#monsterdon

Ransom note just reads like 50% of replies on the site of which we do not speak. #monsterdon

The Pirate Vicar, this fall on ABC.

#Monsterdon
#Silverbullet1985

#monsterdon Generally every horror movie features dull adults and wise children. At least the adults make for some USDA Prime Ground Castburger.

#monsterdon Hardy Boys Meet Rev. Werewolf would have been a better title.

Of course you're trembling, you're alone with the creepy minister.

Also he's the werewolf, as if that mattered.
#monsterdon

I also wish I had a tape-recorder! For no reason in particular though. I just think they're neat.

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

lol, the things kids write online....

#Monsterdon

Is it so much to ask that we have a hot priest who isn't a werewolf? Is it really so much to ask?

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

i thought i hadn't seen this before but i remember that face towel unwrapping scene. and the eyepatch reveal. or maybe i just saw some clips, which is also incredibly likely

#monsterdon

Listen if you have a voiceover, don't just skip it for an entire act and a half. Commit. #monsterdon

Hey the priest is missing an eye too! What are the chances?!?!

ohhhhhhh wait

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

🎵 here's to you, mr. robertson 🎵

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

"Hi Mr. Robertson, I was wondering if you had any. ANY MISSING EYES THAT IS"

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

What's a Yout?
#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

Okay, why not just say "Marty got attacked by a PERSON last night, and he stabbed them in the eye before he got away."

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Oh, narrator's back. She's been gone a long time.

#Monsterdon

Do... we really need the narrator clearing this up for us?

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

@Taweret "Historical Allegations"

#Monsterdon

Why do we have to have someone denying the monster at this point?

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Is it a perpetual full moon in this town, or are they not bothering with the basic werewolf rules?

#Monsterdon

can we call cps on Gary busey for giving a disabled child a motorcycle and explosives

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Okay, so we have an eyeball injury here, so this will be a lovely little reveal in a few minutes…

kid's doing a better job than a town-sized lynch mob

#monsterdon

@ohiofi He's a "care-wolf"

I'll see myself out ...

#Monsterdon

My parents eventually took down our radio broadcasting antenna because I kept sneaking out

#Monsterdon

Your cool uncle brought you illegal fireworks... is how many emergency room stories start. #monsterdon

is that the dirtiest two stroke engine they could find? I can taste it from here!

Gary Busey gives a child fireworks then just drive off into the night, howling.....

he's got to be a lycanthrope, hasn't he?

Or does he bite the werewolves and they become Busey?

#Monsterdon

I guess the character I called the dad is really the uncle because Marty was saying that the uncle was going to give him a cool wheelchair.

Another reminder to never completely trust whatever character interpretations I drop in these #monsterdon threads.

Chekov's bottle rocket?

#monsterdon

what could possibly happen on a 3-wheeled custom hacked trike that goes 90 and driven by a kid with no helmet

#Monsterdon

The movie can stop trying to make gary busey heartwarming any time it wants. I won't complain. #monsterdon

Really, I just want to see him drive Silver Bullet into the werewolf, and for the werewolf to 🤬ing explode

A man can dream

#Monsterdon

turns out that was a dream by the priest! not all the congregation are werewolves and day does not mysteriously turn into night instantly during a funeral!

but it does suggest that maybe the priest has werewolf detecting divination powers, which is neat.

#monsterdon