#monsterdon This makes no sense. The first attack was a clean decapitation. Second attack was shredding the victim like pulled pork?

this old woman just grabbed her fucking luger or something. Murica, i guess.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

On tonight's episode of Werewolf Abortionist. #Monsterdon

But but the werewolf was being werehelpful with her intentions

#monsterdon #Silverbullet

"the baby's yours," "help i'm getting mauled by a monster" women 🙄

#monsterdon

Oh she's not a chronic drunk so her head stayed on. #Monsterdon

thank you mister woflman, now i'm not a suicide!

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985 #BadWhuf1985

#monsterdon I just love it when people keep their guns in their writing desks, but then also like, have no idea where they are keeping their gun

Oh honey. It’s not that bad. It’s just abortion with a +1

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

That werewolf really loves the taste of fetuses.

#Monsterdon

Look out, Bigfoot's climbing the trellis! He's too heavy for that, Bigfoot's gonna have to pay for that! #monsterdon

It's not suicide if a werewolf kills you first. This is a helpful monster ... ?
#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

Werewolves straight out of the gate is the way I like it.

#monsterdon

I hope the werewolf is a cheesy as the bear Forrigno tossed into space.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

This woman would be besties with Dr House judging by the amount of pills

#monsterdon #Silverbullet

#Monsterdon MonsterCam Time :ablobcatrave:

How ironic that a werewolf is going to interrupt an attempt at self-harm. #Monsterdon

She took the red pill, Morpheus
#Monsterdon

1980s: no internet, just drugs and ma playing the piano. #monsterdon

hottake: parents should clothe their children

#monsterdon

#monsterdon
Party time!

Grandma playing piano ominously

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

A tray of pills & piano, the American dream. #Monsterdon

seriously, they're prepubescent why do they have to pay for their own clothes?

#monsterdon

That $1.24 is now $37.85.

#Monsterdon

I call fowl. It didn't turn into a werehouse.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

Breakfast of champions

#Monsterdon

@Taweret They didn't invent parenting until the 90's

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

1.49 for a pair of panty hoses... whew! Those were the day, I guess. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet #StephenKing 🐺🎥🍿

@CactuarJoe@retro.pizza Excellent makeup to not smear on the pillowcase!

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

keep the change
#Monsterdon

I know it's a cliche, but "loving younger brother buys his sister's hosiery" scenes always make me tear up. #monsterdon

It’s not about the pantyhose, you sucker.

#monsterdon #Silverbullet

Gary Busey would make for a very...interesting werewolf. #Monsterdon

These siblings have an odd dynamic. #Monsterdon

According to IMDB, this is the first and only movie Daniel Attias ever directed.

#Monsterdon

Wow, such supportive parents. She get humiliated and still has to help the little fucker who did it. I'd have left his lil ass right there. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet #StephenKing 🐺🎥🍿

Ope. Network error. Pausing riffs due to empty comedy hopper. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

I hate you! And your stupid uncle!

#monsterdon

Your great uncle Red, also a chronic drunk. Keep an eye on that head of his, he's likely to drop it. #Monsterdon

True story: we have long-time family friends, and the dad nicknamed one of them “booger,” shortly after he was born in the mid-80s. To this day, they call him “Boog” or “Booger.”

#Monsterdon

@log my physical biology prof taught us that human heads can fly off with hardly any force at all

#Monsterdon 👨 > 💀 ? 🐺 ! = 😱

Relatable dialogue! Like, kids fighting over whether or not their great uncle is a chronic drunk.

#monsterdon

We had that exact station wagon when I was a kid. Same year model make and color. *flashbacks* #Monsterdon #SilverBullet

@rebeld I hope it's not

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

#monsterdon

Wood panelled station wagon..

You have to understand, it was 1985 and wheelchairs had just been invented, all this was new to audiences. It's like a hacking scene in a 90's movie, we didn't know. #monsterdon

#monsterdon Having been alive in the '80s I can say that those station wagons weren't as popular as the movies would have you believe.

"Don't forget to help your brother."
"I didn't forget."

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

modern suv crossovers could never comprehend storing a wheelchair AND a large cooler
#monsterdon

The basic cooler hasn’t changed in at least 40 years.

#Monsterdon

"Booger"? I thought she said "fucker" with a Maine accent.
#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

I had at least one skirt like the one Megan Follows is wearing. Very fun and twirly, honestly, when not covered in mud #Monsterdon

@diazona We haven't met the werewolf, I'm sure it's nice.

#monsterdon

health insurance wouldn't cover a wheelchair, has to use a gas lawnmower #monsterdon #silverbullet1985

"You always take his side because he's crippled!"

I mean, yea. I'm inclined to do so, you ableist sister you. #Monsterdon

omg the bespoke wheelchair trailer behind the station wagon, iconic

#monsterdon

That seems unnecessarily harsh on the girl. I'm totally on her side.

#monsterdon

Good lord, that's like 5 sub plots already and we're just 8 minutes in!

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

#monsterdon Is, is this a slice-of-life narrated Christmas Wonder Story about Bob Denver's childhood? #silverBullet

Silver Bullet: a close-up study of female crying, by Stephen King

#monsterdon

@paco

🫥

PS. How do you find the #Monsterdon film du-jour and when its starting?

Woodchuck! *Punch*

#Monsterdon

I hate everyone in this movie so far

except for the snake

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Dysfunction? You're soaking in it. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet

wanna bury the hatchet in marty maybe

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985 #BadWhuf1985

wow this has reached telenovela levels of drama

#monsterdon

The dirty secrets of a small town laid bares something evil comes to town? Yeah we in Steven King town alright.
#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

#monsterdon Ahh, not some wholesome as the surface would suggest. RIPE FOR CULLING

Brady now owns three used car dealerships and voted Trump fifteen times. #monsterdon

She says I am the one, but the kid is not my son

#Monsterdon

“A town where people cared as much about each other as they did about themselves”

They hated themselves too? Relatable.

#monsterdon #OffBrandGoonies

Is snek okay? #Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

#Monsterdon 👨 > 💀 ? 🐺 ! = 😱

hosiery were definitely awful

Yeah. Shut up, Brady!

#Monsterdon

Infidelity! At the church fundraiser! #Monsterdon

Is “booger” the worst insult she has to call her brother?

#Monsterdon

that's the way they all became the brady bunch

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985 #BadWhuf1985

An American Werewolf in Maine

#monsterdon

A gas-powered wheelchair?

#monsterdon #SilverBullet

SHOCKED! to see GAMBLING is

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985 #BadWhuf1985

I hope that kid is the next to die.

#monsterdon

What's he ridin' there a V6? #Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Oh Brady, you scamp. #Monsterdon

Bros destroy hose

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

ah, the 1970s, when any person with boobs who spotted a snake was contractually required to stop drop and roll.

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

It's Anne of Green Gables!

#Monsterdon

"Let's not, y'know, go bananas or anything."

If this is an interpretation of a King novel, …good luck, kid!

#monsterdon

did they make this kid's wheelchair out of a lawn mower?

#monsterdon

🦖MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ TRIVIA BULLET 🐺🌕🔫

Tonight's feature was filmed in the Wilmington, NC area, like many movies in the 80s. I'll be traveling there in the fall and will get some selfies in front of filming locations.

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

#Monsterdon 👨 > 💀 ? 🐺 ! = 😱

all country preachers in 80s horror films are, in fact, called 'Lester'

The hair styles in this one scene alone depleted the ozone layer by 1-5%.

#Monsterdon #SilverBullet

Physics nerds can determine if it is possible to slap a head off its neck without grievous skull fracture. #Monsterdon #SilverBullet1985

That snake would have bitten one of those twirps by now.

#Monsterdon

"I have an idea...let's eat from the tree of knowledge!" #monsterdon

Hang on. That's a COREY. Isn't it? #Monsterdon

you're not one to talk, mullet-kid.

#monsterdon

I’m not familiar with US culture, were marching bands playing this tune in town squares as ubiquitous as 80s movies made me believe?

#monsterdon #Silverbullet

so she was 15 in 1986 and if she sounds jessica fletcher that means she's what 65? so it's 2036 for our narrator?

#monsterdon #SilverBullet1985 #BadWhuf1985