Professor loves exposing film

#Monsterdon

Okay the guy getting whacked by the tooth was funny. #Monsterdon

🦖MONSTERDON 🎞️

⁉️ SCALY TRIVIA 🦎

There has been some discussion about the actors. I cannot solve your problems, but The South Korean filmmakers hired American and British actors so they could be successful globally with the film. This was evidently not thought through fully.

Unfortunately, the director spoke no English. This may explain something.

#Monsterdon #Reptilian #Reptilian1999

Why is there keysmash on the alien ship detection screen?

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

Pulitzer

#Monsterdon

I love these aliens and they are my friends

#monsterdon

hut hut hut

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

Ah, the magic ray-wave-electrocution thingy spreads across the land

#Monsterdon

I'm not sure where this dig is supposed to be at, but I'm guessing Africa because of one of the workers' accents, but that might be coincidental? It's somewhere green.

#monsterdon

Holly, I'm going to call you Holly in every single sentence Holly. #monsterdon

@MatthewTitus88 same height, just 50 times wider

#monsterdon #reptilian1999

This evil scientist "should" be a businessman. But isn't.

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

"Something jut doesn't seem right" yeah the script #Monsterdon #Reptilian2001

Wait, the head looked 3-5x the height of a t-rex head. Did he mean this dinosaur is 50x the volume of a t-rex?

#Monsterdon #Reptilian1999 #Yonggary1999

Coffee JUMP

#Monsterdon

As you can see night worker A and night worker B will be sorely missed. Now dig a hole and forget about it.
#Monsterdon

In the secret Paleontologist Tent, Holly is drawing an excellent sketch of the dinosaur skull, when she is accosted by an old man, who is the Professor. I confuse the two. Anyway, the old guy is like "no dont dig up dinosaur, doom doom doom!" and then Dr Campbell appears to chase him off saying "I fear no doom I am the hubris hahahaha!"

Then outside aliens shoot our dig site from space and kill two workers with a cool lightning gun.

#monsterdon

How are the bodies still smoking hours after they died??

#Monsterdon

I decoded them FIRST. I was a dickbag FIRST. #Monsterdon

Oooo., does the evil professor have a giant minion?

Yes he does!

#Monsterdon

oh they're gonna have an academic pissing contest.

#monsterdon

Shtop the digging now
#Monsterdon

VAYNISHED into thin air

#Monsterdon

Lol at Doctor hughes invading personal space

#Monsterdon

O'Neill's been busted down from Colonel to Lieutenant?

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

#monsterdon This is why they ended the shuttle program.

BOOOOOOOO

BOOOOOOOOOOOOO

BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH SHUTTLE EXPLOSIONS ALREADY, MOVIE

BOOOOOOOOOOO

#monsterdon #Yonggary1999

RIP Atlantas, RIP not-HUbble

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

DINOSAUR

*stares at local crows*

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

A paparazzi is never a relatable character, I hope he gets squished
They killed Lady Di!

#Monsterdon

@wohali #monsterdon

This reminds me of Killdozer, a far better movie.

I got one word for you… just one word… plastics!

#monsterdon #reptilian1999

Coffee is held?

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

#Monsterdon 🕵️‍♀️⛏️🐊🐢🦎🐍🐉🦕🦖😱
#Yonggary1999

is this unexpected transition an homage to buck turgidson in that one movie?

Okay, so um after the credit sequence we're in space, and there's a big CGI space ship flying past the moon, it looks kind of like a retro rocket ship but with drill like engines on nacelles and also star-destroyer like sensor globe looking things. Anyway, I assume aliens sent it, because we get a quick scene where an army dude is watching the radar and then it goes crazy.

#monsterdon

THRILL! TO the exciting EXCAVATOR FOOTAGE!

#monsterdon

My movie is suddenly pillarboxed and letterboxed and has a terrible echo. Fun. #monsterdon

I like how only the leader gets a headlamp.

That's how you establish dominance.
#monsterdon

gotta love a spaceship with hella greebles #monsterdon

I'll give them credit for a gibbous phase moon

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

That's a well endowed ship you've got there...

#monsterdon #reptillian1999

lol, are we in Space now?!

#MOnsterdon

One of the hat dudes survived the explosion and starts cackling maniacally. After the explosion a green glowing tomestone looking thing appears.

We zoom on it and see that it's full of squiggles, and the squiggles turn into words, which is our credit sequence. And also, super neat. I like this credit sequence.

#monsterdon

These opening credits are winning my heart.

#Monsterdon

Hmmm... the actor names don't look
recognizable

Anyone else recognize a few?

#Monsterdon

'Bye Peters, the only one of the troupe who sounded like a real actor

#Monsterdon

Starring: The most generic white American names you've ever seen.

#monsterdon #Yonggary1999

The Doctor gets so surprised by the alien skeleton that he freaks out and falls down, but the Professor doesn't want to rescue him because he'd rather check out all the cool loot that is inside the rock with a glowing sigil on it.

So he has his dudes hit the sigil with a rock and then it explodes. Also the angel-looking alien man's jewelry comes back to life.

#monsterdon

I'm not 100% sure, but he might be the bad guy...

#monsterdon

Hoopla’s copy of this film in standard definition.

#Monsterdon #Reptilian1999 #Yonggary1999

dig.

with a hatchet.

uh. huh.

#monsterdon

This #monsterdon starts with some nice hills, and then there's some dudes with construction helmets exploring a cave, which is very fantasy table-top role playing game. Their leader is the Professor and he is following instructions from somebody called the Doctor.

Eventually we find a giant cavern with some dino looking bones all around it and also an alien skeleton and also a giant bridge that needs a safety railing but doesn't have it.

Paleontologists love when the bones are out in the open like this. Saves money on those little broom thingies. #monsterdon

Hold up. I forgot to turn my headlamp on.

That's some real belt and suspenders illumination.

#monsterdon

Launching my #monsterdon thread for Reptilian, which I think is a movie where a giant monster who is legally distinct from godzilla wrecks some shit.

Monsterdon is the thing where we watch an old monster movie every week and make fun of it. Mute the hash tag if you don't want to see thousands of posts by me and others about it. Otherwise, enjoy the sauce.

Back when they let miners do stuff without verification

#Monsterdon

Welcome to a cave somewhere in east asia

#Monsterdon #Reptilian2001 #Yonggary1999

The directors nephew is doing a great at "acting". #monsterdon

90s wave effect, love it
Vaporwave!

#Monsterdon

They shoulda make Yongary's eyes heavy-lidded for this scene.

#monsterdon #WrongGary

Reminder to self. Follow more people that interact with #Monsterdon posts. These are my people.

spin to your right!

wave your arms!

spint to your left!

bend right down!

that's how you dance the YONGARY!!!

#monsterdon #WrongGary

#monsterdon why should a monster drink oil?

is 에너지 a thing in this film universe?

Yongary: "*hic* You don't tel me when I've had enough, Itchy!! Nobody tells me when I've had enough!!" #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

The music insists something is happening, and yet I must disagree #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

that was a Gen-X alarm. it was like: "mEH... mEH.... mEH...."

#monsterdon #WrongGary

"Icho, get back here - *I* want to be the one to feed you to Yongary" #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

"...and since Yongary is clearly a model we'll be sending in our RC tanks" #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

Oh, sure, mountain explosion equals legendary folklore lizard, that's just science #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

#monsterdon I wouldn't have guess it was pronounced like Dungarees.

When I was a tiny person whatever speech processing issue I have made me think that AC/DC was singing "Dirty Jeans, dungarees"

"I am not Patrol 6, I am a free man!!" #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

That falling vase of tulips just thought "not again" #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

Pretty sure Phillip Morris is the real monster in this movie #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

I think when its mouth engulfed the television screen I smelled its breath. 😬

#Monsterdon #Reptilian1999

When your FIL is going to "shove you in a rocket" levels of cockblocking it's perhaps time to reconsider the relationship #Monsterdon #Yongary1967

Bingo!

Also, man L.A. has some really wide avenues!

#Monsterdon #MonsterdonBingo #Reptilian1999

Another singleton #nipplewatch. You'll find the vast majority of #monsterdon movies are either one or none.

@peribotsarah the writers put in one single joke and it was misogynistic trash #monsterdon

"Icho, you've been using your herpes beam again?"

#Monsterdon #DoubleFeature #Yongary1967

I should have voted for this one earlier. Yes, the human acting was horrible—but it was a classic monster story! Thanks, @Taweret, @Cherizilla and @JoeWynne for some good stompy #Monsterdon fun.

@floatybirb 1a) it's really easy to translate alien hieroglyphics from 200 mya #monsterdon

“A freaking prehistoric petting zoo”- yes, please! #Monsterdon

Thanks for a lovely hang, fedi! Thanks @Taweret and @miru for making this happen. Time to search #MutualAid

#Monsterdon #Yonggary1999

@floatybirb Yes. The kids were awesome and the best characters BY FAR in this "film."

#monsterdon #Yonggary1999

I think I was the right amount of unsober for this film. But five times at least I saw something, thought up something funny, and before I could type it out, something else was on the screen and I forgot the first thing.

I'd find myself staring at a partly started post "At least it's not" and I can't remember how I planned to end that sentence.

#monsterdon

@brennen It was a real doozie. A big doozie. All the doozies.

#Monsterdon

Miyaku waking us up with the 🔥 between movies. 🙏

#monsterdon

Fingers crossed that, as is the norm, the double feature saves this.
Original Yongary has to be better, yeah?

#Monsterdon #DoubleFeature #Yongary1967

#reptilian1999 #monsterdon
So... I assume that movie got a grammy or something?

I think we can all agree: that was a true masterpiece! #Monsterdon #Reptilian1999

anyway, up next, the original Yongary, Monster from the Deep (1967) on @miru (https://miru.miyaku.media)

#Monsterdon

@trixter i don't think i've ever watched a movie with so many awful lines delivered with such poor timing and no or very weird enthusiasm
#monsterdon

@aburka wow

That is probably the closest I've seen someone come without getting it

#Monsterdon #Reptilian1999 #Yonggary1999

Exactly two songs on the souindtrack, always the hallmark of a quality movie #Monsterdon #Reptilian2001

@klu9 @CactuarJoe Definitely worst as in worst.

#Monsterdon

I'm sorry, any good will that movie earned with generous use of explosions was killed by the dialogue. THE DIALOGUE. 😂 IT WAS SO SO BAD.

And Yongarry fucks off into the sea to go live on Temu Monster Island. And I have *only now* realized that the Dinobot Island in the original Transformers was almost certainly a direct and intentional reference to Monster Island. 🤔 Anyway. Goodnight, #monsterdon!

Based on these credits I'm starting to think a bunch of Hyundai corporate employees were forced to participate or get fired #Monsterdon #Reptilian2001

somehow... no bingo #monsterdon

That film simultaneously seemed five minutes and five hours long.

Still this.
https://masto.hackers.town/@thraeryn/116553492178798850

#Monsterdon #Reptilian1999

@CactuarJoe

Worst as in BEST?

#Monsterdon #Reptilian