"The human male is an unstable creature"
#monsterdon

Ya know, if you were looking at films from Hong Kong in this era, the fighting was... much better.
#monsterdon

this is some bad fight. Including Kirk and the Gorn
#monsterdon
#planetearth1974

Windmill strikes are not only a genuine attack but also a great way to lose

#Monsterdon

Ok, who forgot to pay the combat choreographer again?

#Monsterdon

Sweep the leg!

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth

In a society with weird rules and bizarre cultures, it is important for each person to announce the rule loudly as they are invoking it.
#monsterdon

catfight!
#monsterdon

I mean their hair is barely ruffled, how is this a fight?

#Monsterdon

DINK: “Is this Dink Extract organic and gluten free? Can I get mine with soy milk? Thanks”

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Wait, wait... I've had trouble paying attention because, well, this movie, but... is her name Barg ???

EDIT: Apparently it's "Marg" which... isn't a whole lot better...

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon👨‍🚀 💤 ⏰ 🗓️ 👯‍♀️ 👭 🤼‍♀️ ✊ 💪 😱

I feel that the costume designer for this movie should not have any second chances

Is “spirit” code for penis?

#Monsterdon

yeah marg.....

I hope they have the Star Trek fighting music

#Monsterdon

New fast acting dink juice, guaranteed to give dinks a bad trip. #monsterdon

"...don't hurt me, I'm tripping balls"

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth

Look just take your Robitussin like a big boy. #monsterdon

Cool knife

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

"UGH, it's BUBBLEGUM FLAVOR D:" #monsterdon

Are you certain you saw him eat the gruel?

.

I can't be tricked.

She literally didn't even actually look... Just saw the bowl and assumed since it was lower he ate...

I don't know anyone who is easier to trick...

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

My wife is laughing uncontrollably.

Wasn't there a saltpeter subplot in the Planet of the Apes tv show too?

#monsterdon

So is the Aesop of this that Dominant women make the men sterile?

Oh boy Gene, oh boy....

#Monsterdon

'dink extract'

#Monsterdon

I was pretty bored for a while, enough to check off a Bingo, but now I just find this to be awful.

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

>> "Gender stereotype, gender stereotype, gender stereotype"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon There will be a gay bar called "Breeder/Field Dink" and it'll just be pretty mucle twunks in hot-pants.

Oh thank god, Klingons. #monsterdon

#monsterdon Just give me a map dammit! I'll smack you up! JUST A MAP! Where's Duran Duran!?!

I get the sense that the exit strategy for this team was "eh, whatev" and that's turned out about as well as you'd expect. #monsterdon

Imagine a gender-swapped version of this

It'd be like Every Stereotype: The Movie

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

This is reminding me of that worldbuilding post about matriarchal societies. Instead of reversing gender roles, you can have the society devalue things that are traditionally considered men's work, and value things that are traditionally considered women's work.

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Please God, make John Saxon ask for more, please.

#Monsterdon

Wait… feeding men makes them docile?

… huh. Not that farfetched really.

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Twelve Angry Dinks

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

“Conduct yourself properly and I’ll leave your hands free tonight” that’s what SHE said! No literally she said that it’s like every line is a double entendre. #monsterdon

EAT THE OATMEAL OF FORGETFULLNESS! #monsterdon

Robert Heinlein had a story that involved something similar. "Citizens" were all armed, and could challenge each other to duels.

#monsterdon

That doesn't look like hummus to me, spit it out Dylan!

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon We’ll have him tested, his electronic clap card makes boop boop sounds, he’s free of the clap! NOT A KOALA!

#monsterdon

Ah, the old made for television pauses.. with swelling music and fade-outs..

3 dinks and a twink.

#Monsterdon

Wait, what the... Did it just do a commercial break? T-they know this is a movie, right?

(I guess it was a "made for TV" movie then? But was it? I don't even know anymore...)

#Monsterdon

aw, no commercials?

i mean, I could really use a break right about now

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

@davesdogmaggie Women be shopping… amirite dinks?!

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

[harp music plays in distance]

#monsterdon

"Don't eat the food!"

So we're in England then?

#Monsterdon

"they made me watch several B-Movies...."

#monsterdon

🎶Just the two of us… you and I

#Monsterdon

I feel like "dosing the prisoners' food" is something that is maybe happening right now in our timeline..

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth

Every time someone says dink you have to drink. It’s the rules.

#Monsterdon

“Whoever you were, you are a Dink now”

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974 #Dink

he was a shrinky-dink
#Monsterdon

#monsterdon DINK... Double-Income-No-Kids! They're all queer! YAY!

For being a dink in a tight jumpsuit I'm not seeing much dinkage. #monsterdon

#monsterdon Oooh! The authors thinly veiled fetish... gelding... Oh, Hi Gene... noticed ya there…

Diana Muldaur and John Saxon both had good screen presence and could be good in things

shame they're in this

#monsterdon

[insert joke about horse boys here?]

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

#monsterdon Oh my goodness, that's Diana Maldaur, Doctor Pulsaski! Hee hee hee…

“Led by the neck, whipped by a hottie in a red crop top… thank god I was suspended all those years” #monsterdon

I've been watching a lot of telenovelas recently, and that was a RESPECTABLE slap.

#monsterdon

Janet Margolin is rocking the Dorothy Hamill cut. I remember when it was all the rage. I had one, too.

#Monsterdon

IS THIS A BECHDEL PASS #monsterdon #bechdelPass

Eff yeah!! Dr. Polaski's the slaver! #Monsterdon #PlanetEarth 👽 🎥 🍿

Dylan Hunt is so turned on right now...

#MOnsterdon

Well I think we alp know what Roddenberry was into… #Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

very bad is when plow

#monsterdon

Heaven's white men working in the fields, what is this insanity!

It's the doctor from season two of The Next Generation that no one liked

#Monsterdon

You can see the character of Dylan Hunt was written with Shatner in mind...

"Bound and led in by the neck"

There's the fetish, he's waited two centuries for this...

#Monsterdon

"Women's lib, or women's lib gone mad?" Nobody else is gonna get that centuries-old comment, dude.

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Raban? He's not a doctor, he's a corsair.

#monsterdon
#PlanetEarth

I could sure go for a subshuttle right about now, with olives and peppers

#monsterdon

So they don't have airplanes in the future?

Seems legit.
#monsterdon

The Savage?!?
#Monsterdon

He's gonna cast Cure Light Wounds.

#monsterdon

oh dear
#Monsterdon

The "savage" is worringly native-american coded. Great job gene. #monsterdon

Janet Margolin played Woody Allen's wife/ex in both Take the Money and Run (1969) and Annie Hall (1977).

She's also terrific in Jonathan Demme's Last Embrace (1979) , which is also on Tubi. It's a neo noir with a score by the great Miklós Rózsa.

#Monsterdon

[praying in native language]

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Majel Barrett sighted.

You'd see the ads for these as kids and you'd know. You'd hope, because they'd make a good one on accident every so often, but you knew it was going to suck ass. Hard. #monsterdon

Would it have been too on the nose to spell it Krieg?

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

See? Public transit saves lives!

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

Gene Roddenberry doing some very William Shatner-esque fight scenes

#Monsterdon

I broke the gun instead of using it for defense, to demonstrate my advanced peaceiosity. #monsterdon

Love how things still work after 200 years, clearly not our timeline...

#Monsterdon

@Lazarou space:1999's greatest achievement was making professor bergman look passable in a space onesie

#monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

"Constructed 1992"

the distant future

#Monsterdon

70s cars last forever. You heard it here.

#Monsterdon #PlanetEarth1974

"Due to time travel I have accidentally become my own grandfather; this is all because of an accident with the time machine and an unplanned encounter with Michael Ironside."

#Monsterdon

Sure, just throw away the expensive fancy gun that stopped working...

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Reminder to all AMAB: If you're old enough to remember watching this please schedule your fourth colonoscopy tomorrow morning

#monsterdon Oh man, Fury Road with no OSHA rules

Man, that was one weak pew, pew, pussssshhh.

#PlanetEarth_1974 #monsterdon

Pew! Pew!

#PlanetEarth1974 #monsterdon

#monsterdon MAGA, i mean kreegs

PEW PEW #monsterdon

#monsterdon Logan's Run!!! I love it, proteins from the sea!

Why is he talking into his Sony Walkman?

#Monsterdon