Jonathan's traveled to the mountains of transylvania to a castle none of the locals will go to, sitting next to this horror show of a man and he's like "that certainly is a peculiar clock." #monsterdon
me when my husband drops a piece of popcorn on the floor but doesnt want me to pick it up and eat it
Oh, I love the skeleton cuckoo clock that's so good π
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Looks like he's wearing a black trenchcoat, which makes it even pervier
#monsterdon
Pretty hot #monsterdon
Cool clock, Nosferatu #monsterdon
#Monsterdon Perfectly normal reaction.
#Monsterdon bad touch bad touch
Fucking IKEA! I'm 900 years old and I can't figure out these directions!
#monsterdon
#Monsterdon Oh no he cut himself this is gonna be like that scene in Twilight. Jonathan / Bella is so clumsy
HE SAID THE THING #monsterdon
dude hold your fingers away from the blade #monsterdon
@adhdeanasl Maybe he has a Japanese toilet-bidet thing #monsterdon
Never cut toward yourself, especially in front of a vampire. #monsterdon #Nosferatu1979
what is with that glass! what kind of flute is it! truly wild trendsetter this guy he has a STYLE #Monsterdon
(Vampire looks at paper)
"WHAT??? No, no, no - this isn't right at all. Take this back to London and come back once this is fixed."
I want that goblet #monsterdon
#Monsterdon Okay, best-ever cuckoo clock.
Pervy Dracula
#monsterdon
I love that clock. Not sure how to get a skullcap to slam that loud, though.
The count is a bit short on self control and the concept of personal space.
"Remember that you must dieβ¦and also what time it is." #Monsterdon
THAT CLOCK IS AMAZING.
Best cuckoo clock ever!!!
elden ring ass clock
bro thank you for putting me completely at ease with your decor i am feeling great about this real estate deal #monsterdon
#Monsterdon (brutal)
Wait those nails... Is Nosferatu the name Count Dracula uses as his drag name?
#Monsterdon #NosferatuTheVampyre
I love that "cuckoo" (skeleton) clock.
#Monsterdon
#nosferatu
![[Emmett] the Vampire](/media/avatars/e882d600e64e5fd72a98375fd65ee0a7e2cdd9812ef94817b9bbf1c862122335.jpg){kind=small}
Bitch I want one of those clocks goddamn! #monsterdon
I totally want that clock! Itβs awesome! #Monsterdon
#Monsterdon is that a ... death clock?
Also, I bet this dude does a great Easter Bunny come spring time.
HA HA oh my god Dracula THE KOOKOO CLOCK are you SERIOUS #Monsterdon
We got three wolf moon out there :werewolf:
#monsterdon Searching that clock in Amazon just sayin
I NEED THIS CLOCK IN MY HOUSE #monsterdon #nosferatu1979
Everyone wants the clock! of course.
#Monsterdon π§ β°οΈ π¦ π©ΈπΈοΈ π±
World's silliest wine class tho
πΆ This is the children of the night, the night, oh yeah *cue house beat* #monsterdon
Skull and skeleton clock is pretty cool, I have to say.
#Monsterdon Harker listens to the local villager's dire warning about the castle Dracula after midnight, and his response is like, "But... the economy..."
far-forward buck-tooth vampire fangs always look so dorky to me, for real
He's winded from pouring the wine. #monsterdon
Drac needs to wait until death metal takes off. He'd be able to blend in at any concert.
Okay, I got nothing to snark at in this dinner scene here, this is genuinely creepy and well-done and Kinski's little facial twitches are so expressive
"Well, I *hope* he likes the food, but is he just too English to object?"
#Monsterdon *insert fascist metaphor*
He would be the worst guy to have do the βIβm not touching you, Iβm not touching youβ thing. #Monsterdon
#monsterdon (that hilariously extended wine glass is obviously a vase.)
Drac breaking trail on the french mani trend #Monsterdon
Is Kinski wearing a bald cap or did he shave it method-style for this role?
#Monsterdon You know if I had huge nails like that I would not be confident in my ability to pour drinks.
I hope Dracula gets a manicure in this movie. Kinda want to see his nails painted
those fiiiiingers when he opens and corks the wine π¬
Not a single thank you? Harker probably doesn't even tip either.
#Monsterdon #NosferatuTheVampyre
Heh. Dracula's giving Harker the same look I give the last Fig Newton :P #Monsterdon
Yes itβs totally safe to enter a gothic carriage from a mysterious count #Monsterdon
Yeah sorry I am NOT letting this guy serve me anything no thank you
Today he'd have a Ring camera at the door #monsterdon
Ominous entry! #Monsterdon
The thing that is so unrealistic about this film as that the real estate agent is not the bloodsucker.
#monsterdon
#Monsterdon dude's rocking his acrylics
I'm sure some of the cinematography will be much more impactful if I was more familiar with the original
And now we meet Dollar Store Dracula!
#Monsterdon
WHEN #monsterdon
#Monsterdon π§ β°οΈ π¦ π©ΈπΈοΈ π±
Kinski probably really did come to the door dressed like that and with rat teeth
#Monsterdon oh wow those hands
#Monsterdon Dude, you need some iron tablets and some time in the sun. Are you sure you want to buy property in England? The south of France might be better; something on the Mediterannean?
"...do you have any ketchup?"
what the hell coach guy, was guilt eating at you because either way now youll be consumed #monsterdon
OMG! Kinski just totally Kinskiβd that intro! #Monsterdon
The thing is, Transylvania is nowhere near the Rhine #monsterdon
@plaidtron3000 you enter freely of your own accord, he verifies it. Lore. I guess.
#Monsterdon Spouse: βSorry Jonathan, Nosferatuβs hat is now my favorite.β
Very true, and yet funnily enough I read this exactly as Jonathan walks up to the castle next to a completely unrelated coach and two horses
I have some questions
I can't hear this song without thinking of the ridiculous old sci fi PC Nibelungen epic, Ring: Legend of the Nibelungen
#monsterdon
It is kind of amazing how all the candles barely flicker.
fingernails...
#Monsterdon π§ β°οΈ π¦ π©ΈπΈοΈ π±
That's a gorgeous baroque (ghostly) carriage
"SIR! MR. DRACULA, SIR!"
Dracula: "That's right, my feldglings! This week's sponsor is Bose Sound Systems! Can't you here the awesome souring notes of --"
[realestate guy cursing himself until the sponsored segment is over]
Nos! Wear a hat, itβs cold out. #Monsterdon
This really is a cozy castle.
"Count Dracula?"
"Oh, no, sorry. Nosferatu. Similar concept, happens all the time. Try the cursed castle down the road." #Monsterdon
Mmmmmm..... would #monsterdon
#Monsterdon
Nearly typed "Mobsterdon" so uh... hey. new idea for a series of movies we could watch eventually
#monsterdon Is giving incel to alt right pipeline
This count apparently is good about dusting
#Monsterdon βCount Dracula?β Worse, itβs Klaus Kinski.
This music choice is fascinating. You could redub this whole sequence with like spooky organ music and it has a completely different vibe. #monsterdon
Oh sure, the fucking COUNT answers his own fucking door? I don't believe it.
This movie is gorgeous #Monsterdon
Yeah, the Count doesn't have any sort of uncanny valley feel going on, does he.
The dark setting and uplifting music are creating some conflicting emotions
Hark a coachman approacheth!
#Monsterdon #NosferatuTheVampyre
@wohali i'm watching streaming, i'm only seeing magical jpeg artifacts
one little candle lit up his whole bedroom and yet three lanterns did _nothing_ in that tunnel, wtf
#Monsterdon π§ β°οΈ π¦ π©ΈπΈοΈ π±
Finally a ghostly carriage drawn by six ghostly horses!