"You ought to be able to fit the patch tomorrow."

MASSIVE VOLCANO EXPLOSION

Oh well, we are too late.

#Monsterdon

the civil war, famously a war over food supplies #monsterdon

So they escaped a war, survived a balloon crash, giant animal attacks, pirates, and a volcano

Now is when Nemo reveals he's a vampire

#Monsterdon

@starkraving666 all of them #monsterdon

REALLY? THE FUCKING VAMPIRE MUSIC?? *REALLY* NEMO??? #Monsterdon

Don't worry. The volcano is only a model. Quick hide in the model submarine.
#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

There's like three different volcanoes going off here. #Monsterdon

@moira @ramsey I'm sure Nemo will get around to making them eventually

#monsterdon

Did he say "it's dinner time" or "it's terrifying" I couldn't tell...

#monsterdon

"...maybe the eruption will just blow over."

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

"Man, look at it, it's terrifying," he says, looking unterrified.

#monsterdon
#mysteriousisland

By now I know better than to expect that anything is going to happen in the sunken city or that it will play any sort of essential role in what passes for a plot

#Monsterdon

@trixter Pretty soon they're going to link up with the cast from Journey to the Center of the Earth #monsterdon

and the black guy is amazingly still alive

#monsterdon

Oh look, Atlantis!

I think it's a rule that ancient cities can only contain Greek, Roman, or Egyptian architecture.

#Monsterdon

is that some kind of egyptian statue in these greek ruins near a pacific island? i...

#monsterdon

wait is the reporter's name Spill-It?

...

it is

#monsterdon

@oliphant Underwater welding is a thing, so I guess I can give this one a pass

#Monsterdon

lol, electric gun? Jules Verne knew about electricity and water, didn't he? #monsterdon

#monsterdon I hope the art team members lived a long, fulfilling life. I love what they did

Fucking Atlantis? We have enough random conviniences going on. We don't need Atlantis too. Nemo is more than enough plot baggage showing up in the third act.
#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

there were greeks and or romans in the ancient pacific?

#monsterdon

THEY'RE IN ATLANTIS NOW!?

#monsterdon

@Taweret if eels can do it, so can nemos

#monsterdon

I have all sorts of questions about materials strength and seal quality, but refloating ships being described as exotic and high tech feels oddly quaint in a movie two decades after Pearl Harbor.

#monsterdon

Navy Seal training

#monsterdon

electic gun? underwater?

#monsterdon

"Oh I just invented some kind of ray gun as well, I'm so clever"

Elon thinks he's this guy, doesn't he?

#monsterdon

I hope we don't ridiculous in these.
#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

jules verne just wrote this whole refloating the ship subplot because he didn't know about putting that kind of energy towards sending endless nonsensical documents to the patent office #monsterdon

uuuggg, 'Underwater scenes'

I don't think we can take this pace

#monsterdon

I like that he took the time to draw the ship. #monsterdon

Drinking his urine is a "dance with the devil"

apparently

#monsterdon

I pray only that now that Nemo has entered the story that this plot does not become the unending fanfic about biology that is most of "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea"

I admire the scientism of it and all, but good god

#Monsterdon

why in the everloving fuck are we talking about post-scarcity and the end of warfare when we are stuck on the giant of fucking animals #monsterdon

@allanb *shock*

#Monsterdon

Oh Captain Nemo, it's not giant animals that'll solve World Hunger, but the death of Capitalism.

#monsterdon

No volcano remains unexploded in a 60s sci-fi flick #monsterdon

For a guy who likes solitude, Nemo sure spent a long time not helping them to leave the island

#Monsterdon

"You see, that volcano is on the verge of eruption"

Oh, you mean that volcano that is clearly not the one on *this* island? Well, that's a stroke of luck.

#Monsterdon

TOLD YOU THE VOLCANO WAS CHEKOV'S VOLCANO!

#Monsterdon

You see because that volcano you never noticed over there [stock footage] blah blah blah

#monsterdon

"Contact with my own species disappoints me"
Same, dude, same.
#Monsterdon

Oh, no. Mount Stock Footage is erupting...

#monsterdon

>"Contact with my own species has always disappointed me."

Big fucking mood there Nemo :big_mood:

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

"My vessel can never take to sea again. She is only a sweet bachelor pad now."

-- Captain Nemo

#Monsterdon

Turns out Captain Nemo has been their mysterious benefactor. #monsterdon

"contact with my own species has always disappointed me" MOOD #monsterdon #mysteriousisland1961

"Contact with my species has always disappointed me"

Same, buddy. Same.

#monsterdon
#mysteriousisland

Wait this has been going on for *months*?

#Monsterdon

"I've been secretly watching you, firing mystery bullets, watching after you from under the waves. Within my pockets are many, many plot devices."

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Vernecore Ultraman is a thing

Crossover!

#monsterdon

"...I am Captain Nemo. And yes, I do all my shopping at Old Navy."

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

@yatsu "I've been watching from the ship and this has gone on for FAR too long. Director! Roll credits!" #Monsterdon

So many languages out there, but they can't have the pirates speaking a real one. 🙄 Nope.

#Monsterdon

WHAT IN THE FUCKING JULES VERNE--

#Monsterdon

Heh. "What do you suppose happened?" These guys are AGGRESSIVELY disinterested in the whole "there's someone else on this island" part of the film :P #Monsterdon

Wow that ship sunk really fast.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon only respect for MY pollinators

So an hour into the film we finally have some sort of conflict, and the characters *immediately* start tripping over the guns and shit. #Monsterdon

[BEE GROWLING]

#monsterdon

I guess those cannons are repeaters.

#monsterdon
#mysteriousisland

Is anyone in this island NOT a buffoon? #Monsterdon

What language is that?

#monsterdon

@Lazarou I was joking when I said it was Love Island now I'm not #monsterdon

These are such Spirit Halloween pirate costumes #monsterdon

"...hi, I'm red, this is my brother green, and my other brother green."

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

I do not understand this obsession old-timey people had with putting pipe organs on ships

#Monsterdon

Me: Surely an 1800s submarine would be mostly brass and lacquered wood with iron cladding

This movie: fuck you it's powder-coated steel

#Monsterdon

"C'mon! Let's leave this submarine so we can go build a boat!"

#Monsterdon

Yeah let's swim for it.

Hey you know that giant crab and the giant chicken and the giant bees?

Yeah.

Do you think there's any Giant fish?

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

Arr, yoho me harties, and other piratical sayin's #Monsterdon

@allanb This prequil to "the shape of water" is weird #Monsterdon

This really is Wandering Into Places And Then Leaving Without Anything Happening; the Movie. #Monsterdon

they found the hatch! they'll have to play the code numbers on the pipe organ or the island will blow up

#monsterdon

Is that a Dalek on the submarine

#Monsterdon

@Taweret@octodon.social well they need to build the Dock first, and then the hydro power station.... #monsterdon

Dumb budget Elvis gets to be the first to explore the Nautilus, so all its cool technology will be completely lost on him. #Monsterdon

It's a historically-accurate giant enemy crab! Attack for massive damage!

#monsterdon

What could possibly go wrong

#monsterdon

I call this the Deus ex Submachina

#Monsterdon

Speaking of Latin, I’m pretty sure Apicius wrote how to use honey to keep giant chicken meat fresh. #Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

Oh for joy a submarine

#monsterdon

....yep, he did. With everything switched on too, just leave the keys in the ignition why not?

#monsterdon

Where was he carrying that matchbox? It's bigger than the shorts he's wearing. #Monsterdon

May I suggest that when you are outside a bee's nest and trying to escape from the bee, into the nest is not the way to go

#Monsterdon

At least her fall was well-cushioned

#monsterdon

Cough cough, maybe we should poke some air holes

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

Time for pirates!

#monsterdon

They're sitting INSIDE a giant candle and decide to light it on fire. 😩

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

Yes...let's burn up all the oxygen in the honeycomb cell. #monsterdon

I bet they're sure glad the beehive cells each come stocked with kindling.

#monsterdon
#mysteriousisland

Oh no! A bee is trying to eat us! Let's hide here where bees store their food! #monsterdon

#Monsterdon

The Honeycomb Hideout!

Everybody want to guess how many normal size flowers would be that size would have to visit everyday?

#Monsterdon #MysteriousIsland

The orchestra plays flight of the bumblebee for meeting the bee?

#monsterdon

good public education is how you avoid things like people not knowing that a giant honeycomb is the worst place to hide from a giant bee
#monsterdon

that giant bee animation is magnificent #monsterdon

why would you think the bee couldn't access the honeycomb that it fucking built?

#monsterdon