the best part of this movie is how much everybody thinks every element of it is totally awesome, it's completely oversold at every single beat.
the enthusiasm, while completely unjustified, is still kind of infectious.
There are some brilliant shots in this movie, including the eye-shaped cell #monsterdon
The falling rock scene (along with 1983) forced me to look up whether this movie was shown in 3D. I think it was not.
Spinny McPenta-Stab.
I was hoping it would remain a huge cookie. #monsterdon
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It's a switchblade Shikuren, nice!
#monsterdon
#Monsterdon weβve got some very convenient thermodynamics and brittleness numbers on this igneous rock here.
USER MANUAL SAYS USE PPE, gloves!
Oh , it's not red because it's hot, only spicy
OOooooh. Forbidden Starfish!
@srol you should see the "Colwyn has quiet private thoughts" scene
Seriously though, the soundtrack sits front and center and shouts, "THIS IS EPIC GOD DAMN IT, ACKNOWLEDGE HOW EPIC THIS IS" #Monsterdon
#Monsterdon I see we have returned to New Zealand.
@aprilfollies I hope exposition man returns in a later scene with more information about what else is going on in the movie!
Donkey Kong throwing rocks. Make a dexterity roll.
Just appreciating those are real mountains and they really threw rocks at Ken Marshall ....it would all be CGI now of course....
"Hi folks, I'm a mountain. Just wanna put in a good word for plate tectonics while the camera lingers on me. Thanks for stopping by!" #Monsterdon
π¦#MONSTERDON ποΈ
A big Sword and Laser Welcome to all new participants tonight!
I'm no man. I'm Chris Pratt!
THAT'S NOT A GLAIVE
#monsterdon No man have seen him and lived.
I am no man! we welcome a trans prince.
"You will need more than men and swords. You will need less tacky pants."
True Facts: This set was so large, they couldn't heat the entire thing, leading many cast members and extras to have hypothermia. π¬
"There is no time now for grief. You spent all your allowance on this mall store throwing star ,you're gonna practice with it unitl you get good or you learn your lesson"
I think if I lived in Space Medieval times I would specialize in poultices. #Monsterdon
we have laser guns but no first aid kids. just scraps of burlap
"...I will heal you with this meat paste!"
Sir, there's something growing on your chest, some kind of moss or fungus....
@ramsey This is #Monsterdon, we'd never let a little thing like everyone dying get in the way of a bad movie
There was just a macguffin removal from that dude. I'm sure that won't be important later. #monsterdon
So are the Slayers some sort of alien parasites controlling those bodies?
okay, the galloping through fire while everybody shouts scene was nice though. that would legit be terrifying. #monsterdon
Colwyn talked a big game about fighting off the slayers, but he couldn't even keep them from crashing his wedding. #monsterdon
Swashbucklery!
They've stolen the bride which I think proves my theory that the only reason Aliens would come to a backward world would be to interfere with the people there, sexually.
Thinking about what that British guy did to the Senitalese to make them fear outsiders for generations..
Soooo the swords make laser blasty beams?
Sure, why not.
#monsterdon
π¦#MONSTERDON ποΈ
πͺ KRULLIFIC TRIVIA βοΈ π
What did it take?
πΈ23 constructed sets
πΈ10 sound stages
πΈItalian mountains location
πΈMassive 007 soundstage
πΈOver a hundred different costumes
πΈ5 months of production
πΈA crew of several hundred
πΈ40 Slayers
πΈ4 tons of painted cork for quicksand
...and 16 HORSE PASSPORTS, each with two photos (in costume and without)
#monsterdon MONSTER ZAP! Not sure what that bright blue light was, exactly, but I'm sure it has something to do with The Beastβ’ attacking and interrupting the royal marriage.
Oh hey, those ominous soldiers clad in glossy black pointy armour can also just scale castle walls as if weightless? Uhhh and when stabbed they break apart like garthim from The Dark Crystal? OK, sure, got it.
ticticticitic as she tiptoes down the ramp
Their laser sticks only fire once
#Monsterdon red and blue lasers. GI Joe calledβ¦
Lasers AND swords, JUST PICK ONE
FOR GOD'S SAKE
Maiwaigge is what bwings us togevah today...
Laserblast! #Monsterdon #Krull
#Monsterdon She has to go to the clinic really soon. That sort of yeast infection can be lethal.
@cd0 #Monsterdon is many things
but yes
Wait. So an alien castle spaceship arrives with an army of space suited alien soldier. That's all understandable. But where did they get the horses? Are those space horses?
#Monsterdon #Krull
#Monsterdon I love how bright midnight service lighting is on set. Set? What do you mean, set! This is the wilderness. With⦠spotlights and diffusers. Wait.
Guessing she'll get captured
Score is 75% fanfare
MAWWAGE
Mawwage is what bwings us twogethaah twoday #Monsterdon
One part Star Wars, part Lord of the Rings, part Monty Python, mix and add a dash of expensive music
Is that a fortress or a really aggressive sandcastle? #monsterdon
Her hair was the inspiration for Merida
#monsterdon This movie seems to be trying to take itself very seriously but this whole princess / king conversation is just giving me very strong Spaceball vibes.
The soundtrack has a ton of faith in this film. I wish I shared it.
#Monsterdon #Krull
This dude like the colour purple and fair play to him, it's a good colour, a colour fit for Prince
This movie would suck so hard if it was made today. But it wasn't.
A bit of Star Wars meets Dark Crystal wot wot
uh-huh yea okay space nobility and space prophecy, got it
β Horsies! #monsterdon
Even the narrator isn't taking it seriously
#monsterdon
It was given to me to know that you shouldn't really start movies with narration. #monsterdon
This, it was given me to narrate. #monsterdon
Iβm choosing #monsterdon over actual science.
#Monsterdon this planet had dollar store fault-lines.
This opening theme is so muscular it's going to gallop away.
Many things are wrong with 2025 but I'm glad we can see a mountain coming at us from a way off.
Whether we'd do anything about it is a very 2025 question.
Some of us would welcome it
#Monsterdon this score is ripped off from Star Trek the Motion Picture. Hahahaha.
"a peter yates film" so we know who to send our strongly worded letters to later. #monsterdon
@Configures @strangefour Yeah, not much to butcher there. But since the film was basically them going to the castle, maybe a Mad Max Fury Road treatment could work. Get them the fire horses at the beginning, add some lens flares, multiple glass spiders, Chris Pratt, soundtrack by Junkie XL... profit. #monsterdon
So I found what purports to be the Krull Script online. The word Krull is said exactly 3 times in that script.
In the narrator's introduction: nd this, too, was given me to know: That the Beast would come to our world, the world of Krull...
When young king whiney-pants recruits the thieves: If the Slayers conquer Krull, your sons will be enslaved forever.
And when explaining the cyclops origin story to the doofus shapeshifter: Long ago, his ancestors lived in a world far from Krull. And had two eyes like other men.
So yeah, blink and you miss it. Or maybe it was drowned out by horny James Horner's honorary ornery horn section. I dunno.
#monsterdon
It's funny to think that the evil lord fortress is falling in reverse π
#monsterdon
Is kind psycopathy how the young royal couple is enjoying this barbecue
#monsterdon
On a more serious note, making the leader of the bandits his Lord Marshall is a nice nod to "I'll be a better ruler" given the intro for the bandits.
Hey @paco, this has to be a record tootstream.
That's another #Monsterdon in the can!
That story had a lot of promise, but it lacked in execution. Too bad. I had a great time, though.
Thanks to @Taweret for hosting, @Cherizilla for #MonsterdonBingo, and all of you for making it fun.
Cheers!
OK, had a bathroom break, secured a box of cookies, settling in for Wrath of Khan now.
And, just to keep score ... NO coffee, NO smoking.
@ohiofi @Zerofactorial They give you the kingdom for free but they really kill you on the subscription. And then you have to return the thing to a licensed dealer when you're done, Arthur had a helluva time getting that done. #Monsterdon
And the aliens are . . . riding horses. As aliens do. Slayers on horses.
#Monsterdon
I think part of why I liked these scenes is because they gave the Princess something to do during all this Questing. Not a *lot* to do, but it did at least sell the fear and temptation to despair.
But it's definitely mostly that they look sick as hell.
@CactuarJoe @ohiofi Colwyn's subscription was only good for twelve uses, he needed to upgrade to premium to get more #monsterdon
Okay, started watching the first 20 minutes, which I missedβand they really just TELL YOU the entire setupβthe aliens, the king and queen, the prophecy, the whole shebang.
I also think I heard a Wookie in there some time. #Monsterdon
i gotta say, I love the whole James Horner horning thing but I gotta agree with @brooke that he just reassembles the same ideas and melodies, so for a Wrath of Khan fan like me at every few minutes I kept repeating to myself lines from Kirk or Khan in my mind and that was very distracting.
ST2 came out in 1982 so it was basically the Origin Story for this soundrack. #monsterdon
@paco thoughts and prayers. #Monsterdon
@SnoopJ is she inside the Court of the Crimson King?
That was one big, dumb, but good-looking movie.
This was a movie with a lot of good stills in it
And the moral of the story is that Hero's Journey plots are no panacea and whoever says they're the best and only way to make a story really ought to reconsider what storytelling can do in the right hands #monsterdon
that was some ass kicking stop motion spider action!
#monsterdon