Oh shit wait that's robbie coltrane! #monsterdon

Amazing aim for one lacking stereo vision!

#Monsterdon

"I've got my eye on you!" #monsterdon

I feel like they reached out to Monty Python for some of the casting here.

#Monsterdon #Krull

"Nine men like you are worth an army"

Ooh, he's learning how to have Character Moments

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon i require men with a certain set of skills

Oh no! They've been attacked by a wild Liam Neeson!
#Monsterdon #Krull

"how did you know I had sons?"

STATISTICS, BABY #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Surprisingly, none of the bandits are enthusiastic about storming the Black Fortress, what with the Slayers and all.

Nice speech, hero, but Henry V you ain’t.

#Monsterdon one hundred men or more could never doooooo 🎵

They always have sons

#Monsterdon

Lyssa is trapped at the optician's #monsterdon

"Is it foolish to fight for your home?"

I dunno, are we getting a lend-lease program? Are the sanctions still up? Do we get Starlink access? #Monsterdon

@Taweret "plot"

I guess to be fair there kind of is one this time

#Monsterdon

It's like Medieval Mad Max up in this costume shop!

#Monsterdon #KRULL

okay imma miss a minute because I'm gonna go grab some cheese from the kitchen

hope I don't lose the plot

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon Obligatory Bandits! Who are suspiciously clean and well groomed.

Let's just end this movie and be done with it

#monsterdon

TINY PEEG

#monsterdon #krull

awwww, little Bobbie Coltrane and Liam Neeson!

One of them dead now, that's how far into the terrible future we are...

#Monsterdon

the poor piglet!!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon Are all the guys flirting with each other?

Ok, seriously, can we please have some sort of historical-adjacent fiction that DOESN'T consider consent to be a misnomer?

#Monsterdon

This looks like another incel trying lamely to get the lady #monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

🪐 KRULLIFIC TRIVIA ⚔️ 🎆

Producers thought an American actress as Princess Lyssa would make more
💰💰💰in the U.S. market, so they just dubbed British actress Lysette Anthony's voice with American actress Lindsay Crouse's voice.

Hollywood Magic!

My mstdn.social instance is being a fuckwad again tonight. #Monsterdon

I’m down for having Chapel Roan as queen #monsterdon

Surprise glaciers!

#Monsterdon

The cyclops freaked me out as a child but really it's comedy actor Bernard Bresslaw from the Carry On films and other horribly dated British movies.
Thinking about it now, can he SEE under that mask?

#Monsterdon

the castle has to fly between worlds but once there it just teleports around, sure. consistency? what's that?

#monsterdon

"You cannot escape me. You will be my queen"

You mean, I have to marry a diffraction grating? Or is it the light on the other side of it?

#monsterdon

Egro looks like Steve Coogan but is not Steve Coogan despite being a silly British man with a long face.
#Monsterdon #Krull

#Monsterdon “The Magnificent” is not fond of Wandering Forest Cyclops. 👁️

#monsterdon

You can tell when a character is a comic one when the other characters smile before he does something funny.

Here in my... fortress of solitude

#monsterdon #Krull

#Monsterdon We’ve reached Tattooine.

If only there were no dialogue, this would be pretty tolerable.

#monsterdon #Krull

#Monsterdon I am Ergo! The Bougie Backwoods Hick. Which way to Vermont!?!

tall in stature…and weird in pants #monsterdon

Krull. The planet is called Krull. It's literally the title of the movie, but I forgot it.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon Comic Relief Guy tries to goose our hero, gets goosebumps in the process.

“The magnificent…” 😂

"I might've been sucked to death!"

That's what they all say

#Monsterdon

turning into a goose and back is the best way to dry your clothes.

#monsterdon

I kind of expected him to yell out in the manner of Matt Berry ... "GOOSE!"

#Monsterdon #Krull

Oh good, comic relief. #Monsterdon

It is a stupid day on Planet Who-gives-a-shit and you are a terrible goose.

#Monsterdon

Comic relief enters

#monsterdon #Krull

@msh It started out looking like an oversize bit of star anise #monsterdon

"travel with us, we need a clown!"

#Monsterdon

Ergo (who just turned himself into a goose) has been in all kinds of stuff.... mostly TV. This was one of the last films he did.

#monsterdon

Meanwhile on a waterfall soundstage. A wizard on fire.
#Monsterdon #Krull

I wouldn't mind being a bat tbh

#monsterdon

It's Charlie Bucket's teacher. #Monsterdon #Krull

Okay, well first off, hello, welcome to the movie. Sorry, I've just recently been scolded on courtesy being a kingly virtue. #monsterdon

What is the technology here? There’s lots of electricity and what appears to be plastics, but they still ride on horses? Will this be explained as I get further into it?#Monsterdon

oh good the party has a rogue now #monsterdon

That's not an ugly goose....you're an ugly goose!

#Monsterdon

shove him back in the pond please

#monsterdon

how the fuck far are they going on horseback. they have lasers and spaceships and they don't have cars or planes?

#monsterdon

"I too was young once." -me talking to my Millennial coworker

#monsterdon #krull

So many Shakespeariaan actors were hired, and the audience just loves their lengthy dramatic readings of everything

#monsterdon

This movie really is just a collection of video game cut scenes without the gameplay. #Monsterdon #Krull

@Lazarou@mastodon.social It's runny jello lava!

#Monsterdon #Krull

#monsterdon boy king: *holds up the glaive, as if to throw it at... nothing? Like, off the edge of the mountain?*

old man: Do not use it until you need it!

We need to have a talk about the value of practice and the virtues of muscle memory.

Some of the art direction on this movie is REALLY COOL.
#Monsterdon #Krull

so do all who live to see such times, frodo

#monsterdon

"There are Kingly virtues other than bravery!"

This continues to be the best character in the movie.

#Monsterdon

oh yeah this guy lmao
#monsterdon

That quest for thing wasn't much of a quest. #monsterdon

"Old man, it's the 1980s, and I have a ninja throwing star. You sure as hell know I'm going to throw this thing!"

#Monsterdon #Krull

It's....a ninja star?

#Monsterdon #Krull

The eye of not-Sauron

#monsterdon #krull

Cat claws OUT
#Monsterdon

This is the most intricate letter opener I've ever seen.

#Monsterdon

"I too was an adventurer, until I took a glaive to the knee"

#Monsterdon

WHAT WAS THAT #monsterdon #krull

#Monsterdon so is there gonna be a training montage with the Glaive? Does he have to earn the glaive's respect?

"When you can take the fire from my hand, bed-hopper, you will be ready to leave the movie..."

#Monsterdon

"You have been brought here for a marriage. I am the king you will choose."

[Looks right to see Wario]

WAAAAAH!!!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon oh god is the glaive the ninja star

We totally already bingoed this thing, and we're not even a half hour into a two-hour film.

#Monsterdon #Krull #MonsterdonBingo

Finally, a switchblade that you'll cut yourself opening no matter how you hold it. #monsterdon

Switch-star!

#monsterdon #krull

anyway cool sprocket for your kingbike or whatever

#Monsterdon

He clan worships the "starfish" if you know what I mean #monsterdon

That's some mall ninja shit if I've ever seen any....

#Monsterdon

@davesdogmaggie I would watch a movie about the bakery that makes 5-armed krullers

#Monsterdon

Sponsored by Shake and Bake! #monsterdon

#Monsterdon *wife turns to me* "they spent a lot of money flying them to this place to film the climbing. they had to get their money's worth on the runtime"

I have the magical deep-fried starfish!

#Monsterdon #Krull

I miss mountains. I want to wake up to these views every day. #Monsterdon

This is a glaive #Monsterdon

Not a single hair singed off his forearm, what kind of Lava is this?

#Monsterdon

[red intensifies]

#Monsterdon

"It's ok...I'm Engaged....we can do this while we are in this stage....funny, huh?"

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon I see we have reached the Flint Water Treatment Facility.

First, he cries over a starfish. Then, he stares at a crack between two rocks. Is the production team trying to tell me something? #monsterdon

Truly he has the spirit of Kirk within him.

#monsterdon #krull

@CactuarJoe Y'know I could just turn off my monitor and it'd be 100% legit epic, no notes

#Monsterdon

@paco

Don't worry, the revenge of the brass is coming...

#Monsterdon #Krull #JamesHorner