Everyone needs to start having children as soon as possible, but also you will all remain chaste in this house at all times #monsterdon

how was I supposed to know the drunk guy who pleaded with me not to destroy his booze had a drinking problem

#monsterdon

@faoluin It's not even a bunker, but a mansion! And they can go some distance out!

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@floatybirb I think it is all surface text such as it is.

#monsterdon

Captain of the Hardship

#Monsterdon

I mean… that alcohol could have been useful for other things, but sure.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Man I'd hate to get stuck in a bunker with this asshole.

#Monsterdon

“Kick me with that blue spot daddy, cause I’m comin’ on for the clincher!” #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 📅 ⏩ ⚛️ 💣 💥 🧟 🧟‍♀️ 🧌 😱

Now do fisticuffs now do fisticuffs now do fisticuffs (for bingo purposes)

not the jug!

#Monsterdon

Good thing prepper dad stocked the house with food supplies and stripper music records

#Monsterdon

This film is quite ....'greasy'...isn't it?

#Monsterdon

dancing (alleged)!

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

#Monsterdon

"He's hot"

John has the lowest standards possible #Monsterdon

Dad's just a *little* judgey and I'm looking forward to the demise of all the men in this film.

#monsterdon

"Did I ever tell you my favorite color is blue?"

#Monsterdon

"Don't touch him, he's hot" ehhh he's a six at best, even after the apocalypse #Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

But if he's hot, you really want to touch him!

[couldn't resist]

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Mr Burns floating out of the woods glowing. #Monsterdon

They have managed their supplies poorly and I blame the regime of the Old Man

#Monsterdon

“The third survivor was a monkey. Its skin looked like a badly constructed rubber mask.”

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@devilgirlbot A present from the hood, lover!

#Monsterdon

I've got the giggles something fierce right now. #monsterdon

Nothin' but class. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon We got our Romeo and Juliet figures. Except they don't love each other, they're just gonna screw if they don't die first. YOU KNOW, ROMANCE.

No means no… err… I guess I’ll marry him in a week if he’s still alive

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

You can sketch what you see and there's a professional illustrator there. Handy. #monsterdon

@steggy #Monsterdon

I don't know who the winner is. But I sure know who the LOSERs are....

Society has collapsed, but we still need to worry about conventional marriage.

#monsterdon
#intheyear2889

And in the category "Most Boring #Monsterdon of 2026"....

the winner is...

Hey Mickey you're a louse
You're a louse, get outta my house
Hey Mickey

#Monsterdon

That rug is a trip hazard.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Captain's gone Old Testament...enforced fruitfulness, multiplication.

They definitely fail the Becquerel test

#Monsterdon

Welp. Now Jada's going to be drunk AND hairy.

#Monsterdon

What is it 6, 8 people? Doesn't sound like a viable breeding population to me.

#Monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

"They should bear children as soon as possible"

omg I can't

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

God, here we go...

"Tell the girls to bare children as soon as possible."

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

#monsterdon Imagine if other movies did that. Imagine Alien, but we don't get to see the alien ship. They just come back with some sketches of the egg-pods.

"We don't have enough food! Also: We need to make babies!"

#monsterdon
#intheyear2889

*are* we fighting for survival? honestly things seem pretty copacetic, there has been almost no conflict over the last 45 minutes. even when guns were being pointed at each other it is debatable if it was actually conflict.

#Monsterdon

WAIT WHAT GRANDPA!? You want the women doing what now???
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

The plantation prepper crew entertains themselves by doing more irrelevant things. The ranger drinks whiskey with one of the girls and they giggle. John tells Elvis he will tell him the dark secrets of his past nuclear test job in the movie in a later scene.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Grampa gonna found the Brotherhood of Steel

#monsterdon

#monsterdon John, that doom is your SAG Actors Card.

ahahaha 'no law against sketching what we'd seen' is a clever budget plot device in the absence of literally any effects, i'm not even mad #monsterdon

deviant art was different back then

#monsterdon

Thank god our host is Mr. Exposition
#monsterdon

Chipmunk kaiju!
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@bk1e your logic has no place in fake 2889

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Hairy chested women of the year 2889!
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

ewwww, the men are so creepy, burn them all!

(the crisps are going down very well btw!)

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon This whiskey was made in my jail cell, under the toilet, where the water comes in and it gets chilled and flavored… mmmmm... musky…

The only one with any charisma. The only one I care when they talk is the old dude. #monsterdon

If this movie is what happens after a nuclear war.... let all the nations of the world band together to make sure it never happens.

#Monsterdon

Seriously a lot of work was put into hiding that this movie was clearly shot in someone's house in the middle of the suburbs.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

They should've just fed Mickey to Grange when he showed up.

#Monsterdon

i could use some of that whiskey right now

#monsterdon

Micky, you need a whole petroleum refinery to keep that hair slicked back.

#monsterdon #intheyear2889

Do you believe in mental telepathy? ESP? Clairvoyance? And the theory of the loch ness monster?

#monsterdon

fuck off crappy elvis

#monsterdon

DON'T DRINK
DON'T SMOKE

WHAT DO YOU DO?

#monsterdon

Steve, we have no game. #monsterdon

@SnoopJ I was initially thinking "Metal Telepathy"

#monsterdon

....telepathy. Sure, ok, we're going there.

#monsterdon

No Bechdel pass, cause they’re talking about Mickey. Sigh #Monsterdon

@diazona proper human dialogue #Monsterdon

Yeah, Iodine-131 has a half-life of 8 days, so at least 85% of it has already decayed. Maybe way more depending on the time

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

wait where did they get different outfits from

#monsterdon

Oh my god

I think it's one of those jumping vampires

#Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe i hate radioactive denuemont

#monsterdon

Always time for a little gay.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

@CactuarJoe Yeah, I feel lied to.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Bikinis? in a post apocalyptic movie? Groundbreaking.
#monsterdon

"You are good-looking. Wanna fuck?"

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

...a pool is natural?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Life guard has three rules

1. No running
2. No cannonballs
3. No mutating into ravenous zombies

#Monsterdon

It is unclear why this movie is called "In the Year 2889" when it seems to take place in the present. But, I'm guessing that there will be some stupid voice over epilogue that looks back on these events for 2889.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

there's the requisite scanty clad womens

#monsterdon

Oh. He did mean "pool", I guess.

#Monsterdon

@Lazarou I DON"T THINK I CAN TAKE IT...SOME SLIMY MONSTER ATE IT
#monsterdon

#monsterdon I get the distinct feeling that the director or writer of this film was saying "The kids will watch for the monster, but if they pay attention, they'll learn an important lesson, too!"

The Bible will save us! It’s made of lead

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

"someone left the cake out in the rain..."

#Monsterdon

@ohiofi #Monsterdon

"Measuring Radiation in the Dark" - name of my next band

#monsterdon And yet, you still smell that way…

hehehe let's go swim in the pool like giiiirls hehehe

#monsterdon

I've had the world cup on tv the last 4 days. Watching this I keep looking in the corner for a roentgen count... #monsterdon

John and Elvis go outside to find that a radioactive rabbit has been trapped and eaten and they blame the radioactive brother for that because he skulks in the woods and talks about wanting to eat meat. Apparently, this is offensive to the laws of man and god and now the guy is a mutant and also there are probably more mutants everywhere or some shit.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

If dude reading from the good book is all the entertainment they will ever have again, they'll likely pray for a mutation.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Okay, but if you end up able to subsist on local game, is that really a *bad* outcome?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

urrrghhhhh, more Yank bible nonsense....

#Monsterdon

For a geologist, Steve is making some wild theories about biology

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 📅 ⏩ ⚛️ 💣 💥 🧟 🧟‍♀️ 🧌 😱

The Matsuo test?

"Defies all the laws of man and god" feels like someone's goals

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

He had time to get his nails done.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

@CactuarJoe dammit jim

#monsterdon

"These bones are still moist" is my favorite Monsterdon quote this year

#Monsterdon

Lenny has made an appearance.

(I apologize to literally everyone for making a Steinbeck joke.)

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Anyway, three weeks into the future have happened and we are hanging out in the Plantation Bunker's Stairwell Drawing Room and John tells Elvis, "wow its weird your brother is still alive after all the radiation and he also hasn't drank water." and then the brother wanders down and says "I'm going for a walk" and they stare at him.

After he leaves John is like "your brother seems danger I think we should kill him" and Elvis is like "bro, wtf?"

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889