Welp. Now Jada's going to be drunk AND hairy.

#Monsterdon

In the later scene we learn that the animals on the nuclear test ship mostly died, but three of them lived and John drew pictures of them - they all look like animals with hands because radiation makes you evolve more. And also they refused food and water like the radioactive zombies of today.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

What is it 6, 8 people? Doesn't sound like a viable breeding population to me.

#Monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

"They should bear children as soon as possible"

omg I can't

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

God, here we go...

"Tell the girls to bare children as soon as possible."

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

#monsterdon Imagine if other movies did that. Imagine Alien, but we don't get to see the alien ship. They just come back with some sketches of the egg-pods.

this is the cleanest, tidiest apocalypse I've ever seen

#Monsterdon

"We don't have enough food! Also: We need to make babies!"

#monsterdon
#intheyear2889

WAIT WHAT GRANDPA!? You want the women doing what now???
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Grampa gonna found the Brotherhood of Steel

#monsterdon

#monsterdon John, that doom is your SAG Actors Card.

we're back on evolution.

someone half-understood the assignment.

#Monsterdon

ahahaha 'no law against sketching what we'd seen' is a clever budget plot device in the absence of literally any effects, i'm not even mad #monsterdon

deviant art was different back then

#monsterdon

Thank god our host is Mr. Exposition
#monsterdon

Chipmunk kaiju!
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@bk1e your logic has no place in fake 2889

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Hairy chested women of the year 2889!
#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

#monsterdon This whiskey was made in my jail cell, under the toilet, where the water comes in and it gets chilled and flavored… mmmmm... musky…

The only one with any charisma. The only one I care when they talk is the old dude. #monsterdon

Seriously a lot of work was put into hiding that this movie was clearly shot in someone's house in the middle of the suburbs.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

They should've just fed Mickey to Grange when he showed up.

#Monsterdon

i could use some of that whiskey right now

#monsterdon

Micky, you need a whole petroleum refinery to keep that hair slicked back.

#monsterdon #intheyear2889

Do you believe in mental telepathy? ESP? Clairvoyance? And the theory of the loch ness monster?

#monsterdon

fuck off crappy elvis

#monsterdon

Steve, we have no game. #monsterdon

After splashing in the pool, the two bikini girls avert a Bechdel pass by talking about which of the boys they think is cuter, but then get a surprise Bechdel pass as the yellow bikini girl spots a radioactive zombie stalking them so they talk about being stalked by a monster and run away in terror.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

....telepathy. Sure, ok, we're going there.

#monsterdon

I hope the monster kills ALL of these people.

#Monsterdon

So, was the lesbian interpretation intentional or...?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

everyone is hunting game these days, it's the fashion in this new atomic world of ours

#Monsterdon

After reading the bible and discussing the number of wrenches of radiation that are falling outside, John brags about his book collection and decides to build a swimming pool outside so we can "take turns bathing in it" meaning that we'll probably get a bikini scene to awaken the audience.

oh wait and then I blinked and there was a bikini scene. how could i have known?

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Old Timothy is always creeping in the bushes by the pool

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

No Bechdel pass, cause they’re talking about Mickey. Sigh #Monsterdon

This apocalypse looks nicer than most of my vacations.
#Monsterdon

Oh my god

I think it's one of those jumping vampires

#Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe i hate radioactive denuemont

#monsterdon

Always time for a little gay.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

@CactuarJoe Yeah, I feel lied to.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

"You are good-looking. Wanna fuck?"

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

...a pool is natural?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Life guard has three rules

1. No running
2. No cannonballs
3. No mutating into ravenous zombies

#Monsterdon

It is unclear why this movie is called "In the Year 2889" when it seems to take place in the present. But, I'm guessing that there will be some stupid voice over epilogue that looks back on these events for 2889.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

there's the requisite scanty clad womens

#monsterdon

Oh. He did mean "pool", I guess.

#Monsterdon

@Lazarou I DON"T THINK I CAN TAKE IT...SOME SLIMY MONSTER ATE IT
#monsterdon

#monsterdon I get the distinct feeling that the director or writer of this film was saying "The kids will watch for the monster, but if they pay attention, they'll learn an important lesson, too!"

The Bible will save us! It’s made of lead

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

"someone left the cake out in the rain..."

#Monsterdon

@ohiofi #Monsterdon

"Measuring Radiation in the Dark" - name of my next band

#monsterdon And yet, you still smell that way…

hehehe let's go swim in the pool like giiiirls hehehe

#monsterdon

I've had the world cup on tv the last 4 days. Watching this I keep looking in the corner for a roentgen count... #monsterdon

John and Elvis go outside to find that a radioactive rabbit has been trapped and eaten and they blame the radioactive brother for that because he skulks in the woods and talks about wanting to eat meat. Apparently, this is offensive to the laws of man and god and now the guy is a mutant and also there are probably more mutants everywhere or some shit.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

If dude reading from the good book is all the entertainment they will ever have again, they'll likely pray for a mutation.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Okay, but if you end up able to subsist on local game, is that really a *bad* outcome?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

urrrghhhhh, more Yank bible nonsense....

#Monsterdon

For a geologist, Steve is making some wild theories about biology

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 📅 ⏩ ⚛️ 💣 💥 🧟 🧟‍♀️ 🧌 😱

The Matsuo test?

"Defies all the laws of man and god" feels like someone's goals

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@CactuarJoe dammit jim

#monsterdon

"These bones are still moist" is my favorite Monsterdon quote this year

#Monsterdon

Lenny has made an appearance.

(I apologize to literally everyone for making a Steinbeck joke.)

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Anyway, three weeks into the future have happened and we are hanging out in the Plantation Bunker's Stairwell Drawing Room and John tells Elvis, "wow its weird your brother is still alive after all the radiation and he also hasn't drank water." and then the brother wanders down and says "I'm going for a walk" and they stare at him.

After he leaves John is like "your brother seems danger I think we should kill him" and Elvis is like "bro, wtf?"

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

rad-bnuuy?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Please, Steve, not in front of the Klingons

#monsterdon

What about Larry? Ready to move on pretty fast, lady. #monsterdon

I'm not saying I *want* to see the character development we're being told about.

None of these people are characters yet.

#Monsterdon

Aaand cue Klingon. #Monsterdon

He should be destroyed. When he comes back, let's dunk on his haircut and how his pants are too short.

#Monsterdon

Destroyed is an odd word to use for killing somebody.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

(I kid. Sorry Mr. Goggins)

#monsterdon

Y'know, you guys could've at least thrown some makeup on the, uh, "scars" on bro's face. Blended it maybe a *little* :/ #Monsterdon

"Would you like to go with me"

every man except Steve is a creep

#Monsterdon

Just say you're going out for a bite

#Monsterdon

Yeah, he (Granger?) is a ghoul now

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

This guy's obsessed with game meat. It really is him!

#Monsterdon

"He's a freak of this new atomic world of ours"

sounding a bit fash there dude.....

#Monsterdon

He's a werewolf! He's a Morlock mutant werewolf!

I mean. I assume. #Monsterdon

Don't kid yourself Joanna, nothing in this movie gives anyone any feelings of any sort

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@floatybirb Definitely all the men are sus & if I had synesthesia or fresh meat it would liven up the movie.

#monsterdon

That's not the score, that's a different movie is playing in the distance

#Monsterdon

So he *knows* he's a cannibalistic radiation zombie?
#monsterdon

@CactuarJoe like. a. brick.

#monsterdon

Vintage squorl!!

#Monsterdon

granger things

#monsterdon

Hmmm. He says he's sorry, but he's sure not acting sorry. And telling her to "snap out of it"?! A lot of bad behavior happening already.

#Monsterdon

aren't we are just contaminated Gsme really?

#Monsterdon

I'm only foreshadowing son, let it simmer, gawt'amn

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon "You like movies about gladiators?”

this guy is a failed Shriner

#Monsterdon

he's holding an empty box and pretending to know about radiation

#Monsterdon

This whole movie is canned beef

#Monsterdon

Larry is a scrambled egg face now, babe… you gotta move on

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

Susan can switch over to the new dude with the shiny hair, the planet needs repopulatin'

#Monsterdon

Apparently you can watch the current #monsterdon #InTheYear2889 directly from the wiki page...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_the_Year_2889_(film)

@CactuarJoe gawd I read that to the tune of "I'm a bitch i'm a lover" etc

#monsterdon

The old dude objects to the ranger guy joining their secret apocalypse club house, because he doesn't have enough food, but he is overruled and the ranger guy joins their house.

Then at dinner the old guy explains that he's in charge (red flag) and has been preparing for the apocalypse for 10 years (weird, yellow flag) and also made a cool paper mache model of his house and yard (weird, green flag).

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

"I have this craving for fresh man meat."
You and me both honey. 💅
#monsterdon