My wife hates female characters who faint at the sight of peril and she is right to do that

#Monsterdon

FALLOUT: NIGHT FILTER

#monsterdon

Is Larry the monkey?

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

And we're going into the final bloodbath, hurrah!

Hopefully, everybody kills everybody. #monsterdon #intheyear2889

#monsterdon So why the weird gun?

Did the director just have one and thought it was really cool?

Yup, just taking my girl for a walk in the night air. Limp as a biscuit. #Monsterdon

@CactuarJoe nuclear vampires, man

#monsterdon

"Use that Luger on Joanna!"

Dude, what the fucking fuckity fuck?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

A high capacity magazine?

Sure, what part of "shall not be infringed" did you not get?

#Monsterdon

...why does he have a luger as opposed to eg: an M1 or M3?

Are my wehraboo vibes tingling?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Wait! 30 rounds!?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

"no other way, use the luger on Joanna"
what?
what?!
huh?!!

#monsterdon

@surdfish Are we watching the same movie?! #Monsterdon

He got the luger for his services to the Reich...

#Monsterdon

With 7 minutes to go the monster does something?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

The real monster is also man in a rubber suit, as is also tradition

#Monsterdon

Joanna and the pool got married and had 3 kids

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

After a while the one creepy guy comes back to the pool to drown his girlfriend for no reason. He then approaches John and Elvis, the former who is asking where the other girl is and the later who is mad that he assaulted the daughter.

John, whose perennial goal is to incite murder, tells Elvis to take a gun and kill the creepy guy.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

It's Adam & Eve, not Steve & Joanna, old man. I don't want a "Human race" bred from these honkies.

"Someone was calling to me! Take me home!"

"He'll kill you Steve! Go murder a guy!" But won't do it his own damn self.

Nice Mina Harker scene. A rare moment of filmmaking in this film!

#monsterdon #year2889

Just SHOOT him, already!

#monsterdon

Ah, here comes Dracula

#monsterdon

#monsterdon The old man insisted that Mickey should be shot, so why didn't he just do it then?

Doesn't have the guts after all, huh?

Bro just shoot him please do this movie a favor!
#Monsterdon

Just shoot him old dude, how many chances are you going to give him? Fucking Patriarchy...

#Monsterdon

“It’s not safe to go alone. Here. Take this.”

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

The Dad wants that guy dead, had a valid reason to shoot him, but... didn't? WHY IS EVERYONE TRYING TO MAKE THIS MOVIE LONGER????

#monsterdon
#intheyear2889

the real monster was man yadda yadda can someone please get eaten now?

#monsterdon

There's a lot of woodwinds in the score for a murder...

#Monsterdon

I was hoping this would be where Jada pulls Micky into the water and drowns him. Alas, predictable violence against women.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

really tiring of the Mickey character, the women should drown all the men....instead...

#Monsterdon

oh fuck off

#monsterdon

Yup, there we go. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Some of these movies rise to the level of "Cinematic Money Laundering Operations” - "It'll fail! // YES, gloriously!”

Who knew that the post-apocalypse would have so many pool scenes?

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

IT'S NOT NIGHT TIME. STOP LYING!

#Monsterdon

Jada went from calling Mickey a child molester to offering a "midnight swim" in 22 seconds

#Monsterdon

John sprained his ankle chasing the ranger to the vault, and, after finding Elvis' dead radioactive brother, he stops to tell Elvis that he and his daughter will have to repopulate the Earth like Adam and Eve.

Later outside, one of the mutants bothers the daughter but won't follow her into the pool, so we learn they're afraid of water or something.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Hopefully Steve and the dad are unconsciously in love and the breeding thing is their plausible-deniability cover story to avoid homosexual panic so the movie could be about something.

#monsterdon

@diazona @wohali #Monsterdon

Schrödinger's Jug Sound

@_L1vY_ subtle.

#Monsterdon

Oh good, I was wondering if this movie could get any grosser. #Monsterdon

Steve is smoking all the cigarette ration solo.

#Monsterdon

He's smoking?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Team Mutant Fiancée

Fuck all these other men

#Monsterdon

Aaaah, Chekov’s pool. I understand now

#Monsterdon

@wohali it's an endurance test this week #Monsterdon

IF YOU HAD just made granger part of your team and like gone out with him and stuff while he goes hunting then you would have had a super strength monster ally instead of SQUANDERING HIM #monsterdon

Punctures but not from a vampire

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

I guess this is some type of frug she's dancing

#Monsterdon

This is the mutant break. Have you guessed who the mutant is?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

“Don’t go into that fog! You’ll be killed for sure.”

goes into fog

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

John, Steve! Tim! John Boy! #Monsterdon

I think if I was in this movie I would probably just get sick of the dumb prepper plantation house and walk to the ruins of the nearest town hoping that I find more likeable survivors somewhere.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Listen to the ADR, Tim! #Monsterdon

No.

Please.

Don't.

Go..
Into...

(yawns loudly)

the....fog....

#monsterdon #intheyear2889

This movie has a lot of people rolling down hills

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

As acting Rear Commodore of the Royal Canadian Space Cadets, I am this close to pulling rank on Cap'n Crunch over here.

#Monsterdon

"I had no idea he was an alcoholic"

1. That's not an excuse, and
2. … Really?

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

"I'll go with youi. There's nothing else to do." #monsterdon

Everyone needs to start having children as soon as possible, but also you will all remain chaste in this house at all times #monsterdon

how was I supposed to know the drunk guy who pleaded with me not to destroy his booze had a drinking problem

#monsterdon

@faoluin It's not even a bunker, but a mansion! And they can go some distance out!

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

@floatybirb I think it is all surface text such as it is.

#monsterdon

Captain of the Hardship

#Monsterdon

I mean… that alcohol could have been useful for other things, but sure.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Man I'd hate to get stuck in a bunker with this asshole.

#Monsterdon

“Kick me with that blue spot daddy, cause I’m comin’ on for the clincher!” #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 📅 ⏩ ⚛️ 💣 💥 🧟 🧟‍♀️ 🧌 😱

Now do fisticuffs now do fisticuffs now do fisticuffs (for bingo purposes)

not the jug!

#Monsterdon

Please do not the record

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Good thing prepper dad stocked the house with food supplies and stripper music records

#Monsterdon

dancing (alleged)!

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

#Monsterdon

awkward house party....

#Monsterdon

@klu9 save us Hercules! #Monsterdon

Did I miss anything or did the radioactive mutants actually not really do anything at all in this movie so far?

Like I think one ate a rabbit?

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

"He's hot"

John has the lowest standards possible #Monsterdon

Radioactive contamination makes you do woodland parkour I guess

#Monsterdon

"Did I ever tell you my favorite color is blue?"

#Monsterdon

Don’t touch him… he’s hot! He’s too sexy to touch!

#monsterdon
#InTheYear2889

I am sending a message to the cursed reality of this movie with my thoughts, and that message is "7 people is not enough to repopulate a species" so please calm the fuck down.

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

The mutants level up like video game characters?

#Monsterdon

"Don't touch him, he's hot" ehhh he's a six at best, even after the apocalypse #Monsterdon #InTheYear2889

MAT-TSU-OH

#Monsterdon

@Binder Good call. #monsterdon

Oh god, the radiation got Christopher Lloyd

#Monsterdon

oh this whole movie is a ripoff of a Roger Corman jam?

wow, low-budget competing with low-budget

#Monsterdon

Mr Burns floating out of the woods glowing. #Monsterdon

They have managed their supplies poorly and I blame the regime of the Old Man

#Monsterdon

@devilgirlbot A present from the hood, lover!

#Monsterdon

I've got the giggles something fierce right now. #monsterdon

Nothin' but class. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon We got our Romeo and Juliet figures. Except they don't love each other, they're just gonna screw if they don't die first. YOU KNOW, ROMANCE.

You can sketch what you see and there's a professional illustrator there. Handy. #monsterdon

@steggy #Monsterdon

I don't know who the winner is. But I sure know who the LOSERs are....

Elvis announces that "There are two forms of life fighting to survive, we must win!" and John replies with "I was a doomsday prepper to survive, but from talking with you, slicked back hair man, I now feel a deep responsibility to mankind!" and also "the women must have lots of babies NOW!"

#monsterdon #InTheYear2889

Society has collapsed, but we still need to worry about conventional marriage.

#monsterdon
#intheyear2889

And in the category "Most Boring #Monsterdon of 2026"....

the winner is...

That rug is a trip hazard.

#Monsterdon #InTheYear2889 🎥🧻

Captain's gone Old Testament...enforced fruitfulness, multiplication.

They definitely fail the Becquerel test

#Monsterdon