"Sorry, gotta split" #monsterdon

Quick Jason, now's your chance, get the Argo through! #monsterdon #Hercules1983

Now Prometheus has a winged chariot. Why not
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

man, this is a pretty good bar bet

I gotta find me one of those talisman things

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

He's splitting Africa, so this is the Rift Valley, right?

#MONSTERDON
#Hercules_1983

Charon: “Sorry, the Styx is like 90% molasses, be right there” #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983 surely this would cause a massive earthquake :D

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

now this'd be an excellent opportunity for a collab with Gojira himself!

'I’m HUGE!!!'

#monsterdon
#Hercules1983

Ol Herc taking us into Macro March in style!
#Monsterdon #Hercules

Will that enlargement spell work on EVERYTHING Circe? :bloblewd: #Monsterdon

Behold the Glory of Mega-Herc!!!! #Monsterdon

so how will making hercules big get us winged horses

#monsterdon

Wait what? Why is he growing huge? What? What does this have to do with the Greek legend of Hercu-

I give up.

#Monsterdon

Have we been playing a game of thinly disguised fetishes too? there's so much going on in every scene.

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

Grow Hercules! Grow! Grow!

"Thanks, Circe, but my wang is still as tiny as it ever was."

"That's steroids for you."

#monsterdon #hercules

Lot of people impressed by composition illusions in this world. #Monsterdon

To defeat evil in this movie we have to recover a talisman from a giant glowing rice grain that also makes you cold, but Herc's muscles are stronger than the cold so he gets it.

But Circe can't help him because she can't go the Thira anyway because Evil magic protects it, so he agrees to give her the Talisman that she hugs like a beanie baby and then a prayer and asks the talisman to take her as close to Thira as possible.

#monsterdon

Her power is bestowing gods with full body viagra.

#Monsterdon

It's powered by Apple ][ technology.

#monsterdon #hercules1983

Cerce kinda showing off her chest there

#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

@strangefour@retro.pizza We're gonna need a bigger Zord!

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

Wait I thought Herculese was gonna get some Pegasuses!

How disappointing he's only getting gianter

My Atari 800XL would be so jealous of the sound effects of this movie.

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

@LingLass
The whole thing!

#Monsterdon

Kaiju Herc?!! YES!

#Monsterdon

HOLY SHIT that is a LARGE man
#monsterdon

Make my mythical man GROOOOOW!!
#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

That's a very long passphrase #Monsterdon

Whaddya mean Hercules, if your strength can't do something what are you even good for

#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

Personally I’d take Siouxsie…. I mean, “Circe” over Casio wristwatch any day of the week, she’s a badass *fans self* #Monsterdon

circe is a top notch networker

#monsterdon

Why does Hercules growing sound like Q*BERT????

#monsterdon

Hold strong, and also very still, because these are all "comp" shots. #monsterdon

"Highest of all?" That sounds like me right now. lol

#Monsterdon

Hercules loves showing off so much that he just leaps in to fulfill Circe's boast. #Monsterdon

Grow, Hercules! 😏

#monsterdon

#monsterdon what about your strength AND intelligence?

oh christ the way his mantittes just jumped there, like they got spooked by something

#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

I can bend my elbow #monsterdon #Hercules1983

wow his pecs are so big, they're actually sagging
#Monsterdon

Ok, what is growing out of Circe’s crotch? Costume designer is on crack.

#Monsterdon

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" #monsterdon

So... She could have taken him where he wanted to go, but, this is much better. Take him somewhere else to get the winged horses so he can fly where he wants to go instead.

Or, I mean, he could have just gone straight there instead of going through all the- ok, we're doing this.

#Monsterdon

The king of Africa? Shit, if you can impress him, you can just let all them piddly Aegean kingdoms piss off forever. #Monsterdon #Hercules1983

King of Africa??! #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

why is the king of africa in an elephant ribcage?

(or is that a MASTODON? Masto-cameo??)

why is #Xena here helping Hercules?

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

Grow! Grow! #Monsterdon

Chekov's Greek gods

(not the other Greek gods that we already saw)

#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

okay, traveling by magnified film negative is kinda dope, actually

I'd make that a third djinn wish

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
🧔 💪 🐻 🎇

The winged horses are lost in infinity..
But the King of Africa...
WUT!!!???

First the random teleport, and THEN the exposition.

#monsterdon #hercules

The winged horses are lost in ... infinity? What? How did they even get in there?

#Monsterdon

ah, the olde gods tongue

#monsterdon

LAdy, stop playing up how important your keys are, I already agreed to get them out of the storm drain. #monsterdon

@bstacey Nah, they had to cut that scene when Lou just stood there and stared blankly, no matter how much they tried to prompt him with lines. #Monsterdon

Circe has a teleporter?
Is that a mammoth!?
#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

Is it a pony?

Forget the rays, that hydra’s clearly made of Meccano, you just need a little wrench #Monsterdon

The gift... of song! #monsterdon #Hercules

only you can reach inside!

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

The King of ALL of Africa. You know, the country.

#monsterdon

Lou’s default expression is ‘trying to solve a hard math problem’ #Monsterdon

#monsterdon
#hercules1983
Yeet it into space, Hercules!

That talisman is a cell phone to Zeus. #Monsterdon

“A curse on you!” #Monsterdon

- "Take it quickly!"
- proceeds to reach slowly while narrating that be has it before drawing it out
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

@msh
*disappointed leprechauns sulk away, hands in pockets, kicking dirt*

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

Almost yeeted that talisman into space #Monsterdon #Hercules1983

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

No, Lou. That's not a 'deciding not to curse Circe' face. it's still that old math problem face.

LMAO and here you all thought we were about to get a payoff on the spacing #monsterdon

#monsterdon man cannot stop launching stuff

#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
🧔 💪 🐻 🎇

Give it to me Hercules!
OK. If you insist..

Also, why is she making him do the Gom-Jabbar thingy? #Monsterdon

Yep. First thing he does when taking the soul of the world from the magic egg is scream and try to throw it away.

#Monsterdon

Herc needs to get into a Guyver suit next. #Monsterdon #Hercules1983

he tries to look mad, but can't even manage constipated

#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

Once again, extremely cheap special effects pulled off extremely well

#Monsterdon

throw it into space, herc

#monsterdon

Herc throws the talisman so far into space, the bear gets it and gains the powers of Circe

#Monsterdon

Ah, he was about to throw it into space
#monsterdon

this is an incredibly toxic gf, Big Her

you gotta let this one go

#Monsterdon #Hercules1983

Ah, a pain giver. So she's a Bene Gesserit?

#Hercules1983 #Monsterdon

Only YOU can prevent space fires

#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

'Fear is the mind-killer….'

#monsterdon
#Hercules1983

Did dinner and hangouts with friends tonight, home late enough that I've more or less fully missed out on #Monsterdon, but hello friends! I hope the movie is good/bad

OH MY GOD THIS MOVIE. #Monsterdon

RE: https://retro.pizza/@yatsu/116157338773742799

Oh noes, I am super unobservant and just now realized he’s nipple-less

#Monsterdon

The final barrier. These are the stories of the starship Hercules. His continuing mission . . . #monsterdon

You know Herc is doing ice baths all the time, that last one was no big deal. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 💪 🧔‍♂️ 🐻 👊 🌌 🇬🇷 😱

it's the test of the burning hand?
And then the freezing hand?

Finally, the room-temperature hand!

Only the simple can get it!

#Monsterdon

So this movie is basically Hercules taking the mythological SATs/A-Levels? How many freaking tests does he have to take?

#Hercules1983 #Monsterdon

[pulls out a slurpee]

#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc

Hercules vs the gom jabbar

#monsterdon

THAT PAIN!! #Monsterdon #Hercules1983

Triple Protection for the Finest Egg.

#monsterdon

Couldn't get the mattes to line up, eh SFX team?

#monsterdon #hercules

The Kwisatz Hercurach

#monsterdon