"Sorry, gotta split" #monsterdon
Quick Jason, now's your chance, get the Argo through! #monsterdon #Hercules1983
Now Prometheus has a winged chariot. Why not
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
man, this is a pretty good bar bet
I gotta find me one of those talisman things
He's splitting Africa, so this is the Rift Valley, right?
Charon: βSorry, the Styx is like 90% molasses, be right thereβ #Monsterdon
#Monsterdon #Hercules1983 surely this would cause a massive earthquake :D
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
now this'd be an excellent opportunity for a collab with Gojira himself!
'Iβm HUGE!!!'
Ol Herc taking us into Macro March in style!
#Monsterdon #Hercules
Will that enlargement spell work on EVERYTHING Circe? :bloblewd: #Monsterdon
Behold the Glory of Mega-Herc!!!! #Monsterdon
so how will making hercules big get us winged horses
Wait what? Why is he growing huge? What? What does this have to do with the Greek legend of Hercu-
I give up.
Have we been playing a game of thinly disguised fetishes too? there's so much going on in every scene.
#Monsterdon #Hercules1983
Grow Hercules! Grow! Grow!
"Thanks, Circe, but my wang is still as tiny as it ever was."
"That's steroids for you."
Lot of people impressed by composition illusions in this world. #Monsterdon
To defeat evil in this movie we have to recover a talisman from a giant glowing rice grain that also makes you cold, but Herc's muscles are stronger than the cold so he gets it.
But Circe can't help him because she can't go the Thira anyway because Evil magic protects it, so he agrees to give her the Talisman that she hugs like a beanie baby and then a prayer and asks the talisman to take her as close to Thira as possible.
Her power is bestowing gods with full body viagra.
It's powered by Apple ][ technology.
Cerce kinda showing off her chest there
@strangefour@retro.pizza We're gonna need a bigger Zord!
#Monsterdon #Hercules1983
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
Wait I thought Herculese was gonna get some Pegasuses!
How disappointing he's only getting gianter
My Atari 800XL would be so jealous of the sound effects of this movie.
@LingLass
The whole thing!
Kaiju Herc?!! YES!
HOLY SHIT that is a LARGE man
#monsterdon
Make my mythical man GROOOOOW!!
#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
That's a very long passphrase #Monsterdon
Whaddya mean Hercules, if your strength can't do something what are you even good for
Personally Iβd take Siouxsieβ¦. I mean, βCirceβ over Casio wristwatch any day of the week, sheβs a badass *fans self* #Monsterdon
circe is a top notch networker
Why does Hercules growing sound like Q*BERT????
Hold strong, and also very still, because these are all "comp" shots. #monsterdon
"Highest of all?" That sounds like me right now. lol
Hercules loves showing off so much that he just leaps in to fulfill Circe's boast. #Monsterdon
Grow, Hercules! π
#monsterdon what about your strength AND intelligence?
oh christ the way his mantittes just jumped there, like they got spooked by something
I can bend my elbow #monsterdon #Hercules1983
wow his pecs are so big, they're actually sagging
#Monsterdon
Ok, what is growing out of Circeβs crotch? Costume designer is on crack.
"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" #monsterdon
So... She could have taken him where he wanted to go, but, this is much better. Take him somewhere else to get the winged horses so he can fly where he wants to go instead.
Or, I mean, he could have just gone straight there instead of going through all the- ok, we're doing this.
The king of Africa? Shit, if you can impress him, you can just let all them piddly Aegean kingdoms piss off forever. #Monsterdon #Hercules1983
King of Africa??! #Monsterdon
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
why is the king of africa in an elephant ribcage?
(or is that a MASTODON? Masto-cameo??)
why is #Xena here helping Hercules?
#Monsterdon #Hercules1983
Grow! Grow! #Monsterdon
okay, traveling by magnified film negative is kinda dope, actually
I'd make that a third djinn wish
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
π§ πͺ π» π
The winged horses are lost in infinity..
But the King of Africa...
WUT!!!???
First the random teleport, and THEN the exposition.
The winged horses are lost in ... infinity? What? How did they even get in there?
ah, the olde gods tongue
LAdy, stop playing up how important your keys are, I already agreed to get them out of the storm drain. #monsterdon
@bstacey Nah, they had to cut that scene when Lou just stood there and stared blankly, no matter how much they tried to prompt him with lines. #Monsterdon
Circe has a teleporter?
Is that a mammoth!?
#Monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
Is it a pony?
Forget the rays, that hydraβs clearly made of Meccano, you just need a little wrench #Monsterdon
The gift... of song! #monsterdon #Hercules
only you can reach inside!
#Monsterdon #Hercules1983
The King of ALL of Africa. You know, the country.
Louβs default expression is βtrying to solve a hard math problemβ #Monsterdon
#monsterdon
#hercules1983
Yeet it into space, Hercules!
That talisman is a cell phone to Zeus. #Monsterdon
βA curse on you!β #Monsterdon
- "Take it quickly!"
- proceeds to reach slowly while narrating that be has it before drawing it out
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
@msh
*disappointed leprechauns sulk away, hands in pockets, kicking dirt*
Almost yeeted that talisman into space #Monsterdon #Hercules1983
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
No, Lou. That's not a 'deciding not to curse Circe' face. it's still that old math problem face.
LMAO and here you all thought we were about to get a payoff on the spacing #monsterdon
#monsterdon man cannot stop launching stuff
#monsterdon #TheIncredibleHerc
π§ πͺ π» π
Give it to me Hercules!
OK. If you insist..
Also, why is she making him do the Gom-Jabbar thingy? #Monsterdon
Yep. First thing he does when taking the soul of the world from the magic egg is scream and try to throw it away.
Herc needs to get into a Guyver suit next. #Monsterdon #Hercules1983
he tries to look mad, but can't even manage constipated
Once again, extremely cheap special effects pulled off extremely well
throw it into space, herc
Herc throws the talisman so far into space, the bear gets it and gains the powers of Circe
Ah, he was about to throw it into space
#monsterdon
Ah, a pain giver. So she's a Bene Gesserit?
Only YOU can prevent space fires
'Fear is the mind-killerβ¦.'
Did dinner and hangouts with friends tonight, home late enough that I've more or less fully missed out on #Monsterdon, but hello friends! I hope the movie is good/bad
OH MY GOD THIS MOVIE. #Monsterdon
RE: https://retro.pizza/@yatsu/116157338773742799
Oh noes, I am super unobservant and just now realized heβs nipple-less
The final barrier. These are the stories of the starship Hercules. His continuing mission . . . #monsterdon
You know Herc is doing ice baths all the time, that last one was no big deal. #Monsterdon
#Monsterdon πͺ π§ββοΈ π» π π π¬π· π±
it's the test of the burning hand?
And then the freezing hand?
Finally, the room-temperature hand!
Only the simple can get it!
So this movie is basically Hercules taking the mythological SATs/A-Levels? How many freaking tests does he have to take?
[pulls out a slurpee]
Hercules vs the gom jabbar
THAT PAIN!! #Monsterdon #Hercules1983
Triple Protection for the Finest Egg.
Couldn't get the mattes to line up, eh SFX team?
The Kwisatz Hercurach