that few weeks in 1980 when a certain type of insufferable kid declared his name change and said I AM CALLED HAWK to anyone in shouting distance #Monsterdon
BE STILL UGLY ONE! #Monsterdon
βThe Table of Fiveβ
I swear this movie needed to go ask a room of 2nd graders to name everything, because these are the most boring names ever
W Morgan Sheppard! I recognize him from #StarTrek. He's in one of the movies, but he's also in one of my fav episodes, #StarTrekVoyager #Bliss. π
medieval hare krishnas were hardcore
@Lazarou i'm on a zoom meeting right now and I think I accidentally just said 'I'm going to throttle you with your gizzard" to the CEO (whoops!!) #monsterdon
White robed dudes around fire pit.
"So the thing is, you want the marshmallow evenly toasted all around"
Ah, well that is some comfort at least.
"...we shall shoot you with our holy flaming marshmallows"
@CactuarJoe@retro.pizza There isn't even a Woman class in D&D first edition!
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
Baldin is not baldin'
what shit shots β:FireBow:β
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer1980
"ugly one" The ultimate insult!
We spent so much more time on the elf archery contest con than the giant unfixing the cart
he's.... he's not that ugly? what????
#Monsterdon π π¬ π βοΈπ¦ π±
I wonder what Blaze, Star, Blackie and Silver are doing right now
you all missed π€¦
Hoes Ami means friends of hoes.
Yeah, hose me too.
#monsterdon
"Ho's a me"?
Hosa me
Deez a nuts
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
I figured it out! The entire D&D party is full of autists! #monsterdon
Owah
Tagu
Siam...
#Monsterdon π π¬ π βοΈπ¦
π±
#HawkTheSlayer1980
Elf stands dramatically and says:
"No one puts the elf on a shelf!"
"Hosa me ... Hosa me ..."
Hosa me? Hosa me down! #Monsterdon
Oh it's the drunk monk from Vinland Saga
Party of five? #Monsterdon
#monsterdon "elfin archer" did not make me think I was going to see a Richard Belzerlike in an orange tracksuit
The technicolor hula hoop over witchery was a popular transit system until disco horse gained widespread popularity.
A thing that bugs me consistently is how whole groups will attack someone after watching three people die. I really don't get the trope, it feels like it says something, it weirds me out. Why aren't people worried or scared? It's strange, I don't get it, but it sits with me.
Oh FFS not another trip!
< He's about to get Shafted...! I can't look... >
Hey isn't that eye bandana in Legend of Zelda. #Monsterdon
C'mon, the whole audience saw that coming.
Fitzwaller has lost the love of his life there. #Monsterdon
Whatever you do. Don't emote. #monsterdon
This guy's a serious Elfist. #monsterdon
Ok so this is a lost Vulcan colony
#Monsterdon none of these heroes are heroic
Making the pointy-eared elf with the Roman bangs play Spock, but an archer, is certainly a choice
this is a terrible countdown. no cadence at all
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer1980
Those aren't tournament rules! Three two one GO shoot!
#Monsterdon is humanity forest dwelling nomads in this universe
Crow seems like they might be really into trains
#monsterdon
Is Crow the Elf supposed to sound like a robot?
Ben Stiller Robot Elf Edition #Monsterdon
An archery duel! #Monsterdon
That is such a fat, blunt sword blade.
MY ARROW. HIT FIRST.
The elf is a robot!
It's not any sword, it's a pointing sword!
Hawk's sword has a seam down the middle.
Tiny Peter Gallagher elf seems annoyed.
#monsterdon
#hawktheslayer
I kind of like they occassionally throw in a Bugs Bunny sound effect. #monsterdon
Heβs just doing Spock! #Monsterdon
#monsterdon "Gentlemen, calm your tits. The bigger woman has to... THAT'S RIGHT... FETCH THE COFFEE! :)
We have Spock at home.
. . . The vulcan at home.
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
This "blacksmith" must think he's in the bell choir. He's tapping that thing enough to make a cute 'ting!' and that's it.
I am Ser Nunya, of Bidness. #Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
i thought they said ol boy was burned?
#Monsterdon the bird squad is meeting up
Crow! β:crowCaw:β β:crow:β #Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer1980
It's Qrow! From RWBY #Monsterdon
So this guy needs to have at least two gold on him for you to break even. Doesn't seem like good odds.
His name is Spock.
[MUSICAL STING]
CROW!
#monsterdon
oh christ are those ears literally papier-machΓ©?
and here we have ~Spock~ Crow.
This is a long intro session for this Pathfinder campaign. But atleast they didn't all start out in a tavern, it's quicker but I've grown weary of that cliche.
#Monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
Legolas wore it better
Wait. I just left to get a drink, and now it's Assassin's Creed?
that's Ralf? I thought that was Hawk just chilling out... whoops!
"And I'm the humble Harcourt Fenton Mudd."
@cocaine_owlbear they keep breaking wheels on the plaster skulls everywhere #monsterdon
beautiful fiberglass bows!
The well known forest blending qualities of orange. #Monsterdon
Greetings! My friend and I saw you from across the clearing and really like your vibe! #monsterdon
"I'm not so sure about this one"
Yeah I say that about EVERY #Monsterdon movie
Maybe the guy is a ghost and doesn't know it
Good day to you Mr Blacksmith, I speak to you with my best British accent!
That can't be that good of a smithy if his fire is just a BBQ
#monsterdon
I'm not convinced Voltan is all that much worse than the zillion other baddies in this movie.
me to @needlessmustard "You play D&D, aren't you legally required to like sword and sorcery movies like this?"
"Uhhhh..."
This guy making a bad decision was in The Doctor Who episode The Talons of Wang Chiang #monsterdon #HawkTheSlayer
There's apparently an epidemic of broken wagon wheels...
This Blacksmith is for Display Purposes Only
He never had to ask. Why waste good acting :scremcat:
#monsterdon #hawktheslayer
The stingy guy whose nose was referenced seemed kind-of Golders Green to me, but I'll not mind it too much.
Some aggressions really are micro, especially when compared to some others around and aboutβ¦.
Just tap the arrowheads and theyβll be fine. #Monsterdon
Wait is this movie actually a subversive message on labor relations?
#Monsterdon π π¬ π βοΈπ¦
π±
#HawkTheSlayer1980
That bow is strung with yarn. The arrows would travel two feet.
Are these Rosencrantz and Gildenstern?
I'm beginning to think that all the fantasy movies of the 80s were just expansions of individual scenes of this movie.
The protagonist looks like one of the professors on Saved by the Bell; The College Years. #monsterdon
seriously posture and outfit suggests "I'm emo but my school banned wearing black to show that"