Has anyone in this movie got suspicious that Harker's wardrobe might be hiding throat wounds?

#monsterdon

ALWAYS read the fine print in every contract! 💉🩸 #Monsterdon

From: @paco
https://infosec.exchange/@paco/113342873199507206

"...this time I will make sure we stay awake."
<Breaking Bad theme music>

#Monsterdon #Dracula

You know, since she got a blood transfusion... does that make her blood like a cocktail to Dracula?

#Monsterdon

Oh so we are just forgoing the subtext of the neck bite and making out full on the lips before sexy Dracula times.
. . . Oh wait no he remeembered the blood sucking.
#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

“What is happening to her?!”
“Drink?”
That is in fact what is happening to her.
#Monsterdon

OUCH!

I thought Dracula was supposed to be supernaturally seductive, but this is just the clumsiest, clonkiest middle-school kissing I've seen onscreen. 😂

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

OK that vampiric kissing was super weird

Ahhh Paul just read that Dan Curtis is the creator of Dark Shadows, this is starting to make sense.

#monsterdon

Potentially useful #sixDegrees factoid: Nigel Davenport (van Helsing) also played Scrooge's asshole father in the 1984 George c Scott Christmas Carol #monsterdon

@Taweret justice for Quincey #monsterdon

Creepy music box music: check

#Monsterdon

@jsadow You're soaking in it!

#monsterdon

so they know about vampires but not about dracula ya sure like that makes sense. even i have seen a vampire movie that says dracula is one #monsterdon

This Van Helsing looks like Magnum PI's grandfather. I think it's the mustache. #Monsterdon #Dracula1974

I have reason to believe that you spent more money on your ascot than I did.

#Monsterdon

Blood type groups weren't discovered till 1901. #monsterdon

once again I have to ask, where is the cowboy? where is Quincey?

#monsterdon

Nosferatu... isn't that the enemy which is when The Doctor meets his wife?

River Song has left the library. River Song has been saved.

#Monsterdon

Why was the exact same picture in a newspaper cutting? #monsterdon

Wish I could get away with wearing a big throat bow like Harker

#monsterdon

Let's do it again!
#Monsterdon

Van Helsing: I could have told you this immediately, but I wanted to dick everyone around for a few days... #Monsterdon

kudos to whoever did the closed captions, appropriately describing the music

#Monsterdon

Nostferatu? Surely you can't be serious?

#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

Jack Palance has a great face for this role. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon italians are always safe from vampires

Serious but understandable diversion from the plot: Van Helsing actually tells anyone anything

#Monsterdon

@socketwench yeah got to stop the uterus from wandering around her body

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

Lucy has a very purposeful stride for a somnambulist

Me at work this year: "Will it work?" "It is already working."

#Monsterdon

Lord Arthur Holmwood, useless in EVERY version 😴💤 #Monsterdon 🧛🏻 #Dracula1974

some lego scattered on the floor around her bed would keep her from going too far. too bad it hadn't been invented yet

#monsterdon

"Have you ever heard of Nosferatu?"

That's a kind of brussel sprout, right? #Monsterdon

You can't just give her the maid's blood, it's all working-class!

#monsterdon

Wat's up with all these dudes falling asleep with their vests on?

That's a lot of buttons! and watch chains! seems uncomfortable!

#monsterdon

@neia and it enthralls you with toxoplasmosis

#monsterdon

@ricci I mean, it's #Monsterdon, so a bunch of daytime shots supposed to be night, simultaneous over- and under-acting, and some unconvincing makeup effects. You know, the usual and it's great!

Hope that maid is the right blood type!

#monsterdon

@plaidtron3000 look all i know about vampires is they are bats, they drink the blood, don't be seen in mirrors, and they can also turn you into a vampire but it's unclear to me whether it's when you bite them or they bite you #monsterdon

Zoom zoom #monsterdon

@nev @Taweret Oh, these USELESS bodyguards! ##DanCurtisBramStokerDracula #Monsterdon

Someone, possibly On Here, possibly in YouTube comments or whatever, noted that Dan Curtis's _Bram Stoker's Dracula_ did "female character reminds Dracula of long-dead wife" before Francis Ford Coppola's _Bram Stoker's Dracula_. Somehow it's less bad in this film???

#Monsterdon

Just take the blood from the servants. They're expendable.

#monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

#Monsterdon Arthur! She’s gone! Where’d she go! She’s over there! And here! And with a neck full of Thorazine, on a bench, having a stare nap.

The outside of the house in daylight makes me think Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

#monsterdon

That chair must be very comfy and cozy, worst possible choice to stand guard #monsterdon

Wait. Was this guy in The Thornbirds? Now I have to go look it up.

#Monsterdon

If the eroticism is going to be this unerotic lets just keep it to erotic subtext.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

@cheribaker van helsing has the velvet smoking jacket! It has quilted satin lining!

THE NECK, JACK, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GO FOR THE *NECK*

WORK YOUR WAY SOUTH, MAN! #Monsterdon

All that tacky red wallpaper is making Palance snarl.
#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

GREAT JOB TEAM NICE JOB

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

This blue filter for night is sooo much #monsterdon #dracula1974

Nice touch that they dyed his fangs to match the rest of his nicotine stains. #Monsterdon #Dracula1974

Before you take this role, I feel like I should let you know that Jack Palance is going to lick your whole face. #monsterdon

Drac giving her the ol' razzle dazzle

Believe it....or not?

Well...not actually but I appreciate Jack's efforts #Monsterdon

OK, Nope! ick ick

#Monsterdon

Joining #Monsterdon halfway through tonight but eh it's Dracula how much could I really have missed?

very skinny 1970s eyebrows there #Monsterdon

SO much tongue fencing. Just bite her, Drac.

Gross.

#monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

#Monsterdon girl looks ill. this is not romantic at all

Mommy is this what sucking face means? #monsterdon #dracula1974

i really need the lucy from the other movie, daring Dracula to take another step into her bathroom and get a little closer to the cross. #monsterdon

it's like watching crepe paper make out

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

More sleepwalking - Lucy, you got some 'splainin to do #monsterdon

Dude, eat her face man!

#monsterdon

Nobody in this movie knows how to kiss, got it #Monsterdon

Lucy got shark eyes #monsterdon

I will definitely give this version of Lucy props for enormous entranced spooky eyes.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

What is the stuff on the walls at the carfax estate?

I couldn't help making orgasm noises when she was moaning before I even considered that my mother in law is here but naturally she lmao'd #monsterdon #dracula1974

After so many movies I'm starting to question if it was all day for night shooting, or if maybe from the 1930s to the mid 1980s the sky was just a really dark blue at night.
#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

nice dental work for dracula #monsterdon

It's not just @jonny, I'm also having to explain vampire mythology to my mom as we progress.

#monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

#Monsterdon Oh... er... no?

(Pretty sure there are worse ways to die.)
#Dracula1974

I might be a little cross if there's a Carfax commercial

#Monsterdon #Dracula1974

@steggy [Sinister music]

#monsterdon

Those are some convincingly realistic spider webs. #monsterdon

Oh, a relevant ad for once. Hello, Buffy.

#Monsterdon
#Dracula1974

@sean Man, these 'stadium naming rights' deals have gotten out of control

#monsterdon

I think I’ll just read a novel because reading keeps me awake….zzzzzz.

#Monsterdon #Dracula

Welp, another day, another complete failure by Van Helsing. #Monsterdon

The night scenes in this #Monsterdon are pretty daylight-y I mean there is only so much you can do with blue gels

Totally channeling Dark Shadows. #Monsterdon

Carfax Abbey!!

Can I learn whether my prospective auto purchase has been in a wreck or a flood here? >snicker<

#Monsterdon

Jonathan looks like Mr Bean and Arthur looks like Luke Skywalker, it's very distracting

#monsterdon

"....I brought this bench all the way from Transylvania."

#Monsterdon #Dracula

so much day for night whyyyyyyyyyyyyy

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

All these closeups on Jack!Drac are just showing us that dude looks _way_ too pink for somebody that's supposed to be undead and who feasts on blood. He looks like he's probably already snacked on half a dozen girls on the way over for the main course.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

These men have the fluffiest bows on their neckwear that I've ever seen

Whatever barbiturates they gave Palance for this film, I want some. #monsterdon #palanceIsDracula

@trixter also *heavy breathing intensifies*

#Monsterdon

Ambiguous time of day: check

Everyone except Jonathan starts acting weird when Dracula is mentioned: check

Doggies: check

All is right with the world, but not too right

#Monsterdon

Shoot. Skipping ahead because commercials made me miss why there's a round the clock guard on the house.

#monsterdon
#Dracula1974

#Monsterdon ⚰️ 🧛‍♀️ 🦇 😱

So I guess fruit under a glass globe was a thing?

Not really feeling this as 'Count Dracula' more, 'Jack Palance dresses up as Dracula for a Hollywood Halloween Party and took too many 'luudes'

#monsterdon

palance! PALANCE! Wake up!

#monsterdon #Dracula1974

Who in 1974 would you choose to play Dracula over Jack Palance? #monsterdon