#Monsterdon sorry, guys. The Owlbear is too confused to make coherent riffs at this point. Soβ¦
Remember all the horse but earlier? Good times.
Thatβs pretty much how sex goes, right?
MORE girl-on-girl vampire action!
And is that . . . chocolate milk?
#Monsterdon
Was that hearing-impaired scene all just an act? Confused #monsterdon
These fuckers used GUINEA PIGS for ALL the animal shrieks :D xD
Shit, I don't have time to photoshop Dracula into that "I Consent, I Consent (jesus) I Don't!" picture. Just imagine it, please. #Monsterdon
Waste of a perfectly good match.
#monsterdon
@kcarr2015 Oh, sorry for the cultural insensitivity. #monsterdon
Doctor: What's the matter?
Actress rolling on floor screaming: My agent can't get me out of this contract...
@RobynGoodfellow someone on here did a GIF of it, landing and turning into a human shape, I wish I could find it.
it was amazing.
I think this is the first dialogue in the entire movie that has taken the form of a conversation. We're getting closer to that bechdel test pass #monsterdon
wait, where are the blonde vampire girl?
And who is the generic greyhair?
#monsterdon
His & hers beds because, despite all the butt and boob showing, you've gotta follow the Hayes Code.
#DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein #Monsterdon
(distant bat shrieking) (moaning) #monsterdon
He got nervous that she was leading him to the sleeping bed, but she made a last-second pivot to the sex bed. #monsterdon
"Swinging Bats in YOUR AREA"
Time for a steamy love sceneβ¦break out the twin beds placed four feet apart
Okay, lets count how many girls are their?
Screaming Dracula bit girl
dead French singer Mando babe
Girl-bit gypsy vampire girl
Vampire bride
And bat. Is there more than one bat?
#monsterdon
Oops, a new victim enters the scene.
(Cue PokΓ©mon fight music)
@kshernandez
It's not annoying, it's European. π€·ββοΈ
#Monsterdon dracula's castle is always in a permanent cloud layer
"microclimates" they call it
"...what are my lines? I only see hmmm on the page."
"Those are your lines."
Hey - a woman said something!
I suppose it's too much to hope we're suddenly watching a different movie now
@arisummerland Umm. Nothing.
"What is it...?"
"It's a ruined castle."
"Could it be a ruined Abby?"
"If it is, it would be... Abby Normal."
< All actors look at camera >
And they bit two friends, then they bit two friends, and so on, and so onβ¦
#Monsterdon
Darling, we need to talk
mmm
I'm in love with Martin
mmm
I'm leaving you
mmm
Say something!!
mmm
#monsterdon
Well, a woman did say words but ... well, be careful what you wish for I guess
Okay like who is the dude in the fur coat? Making out before dinner? What is going on?
#Monsterdon
#Monsterdon it's not even the look he had in that movie but that's what i keep thinking
#monsterdon Frankenstein's monster gets by with a little help from his friends
lousy bat scene strikes back
#monsterdon
OMG, these bats don't even...oh I'm going to be ill. π¦
#monsterdon More mumbling, more gasping. More confused orgasms. Pull my finger.
@ColesStreetPothole Like... for playing Cricket? #Monsterdon #NotWatchingMonsterdon
Was this a student film? Please tell me this was a student film. Certainly the camera work was done by a student who enjoys boobs. #Monsterdon
How do you solve a problem like Maria?
Oh no! She has the walrus tusks instead of vampire fangs π π§
I was away for 10 minutes. What did I miss?
Omg you could see the fishing line on the fake bat lol #Monsterdon
This scene has as much dialogue as the entire movie so far. #Monsterdon
@nantucketebooks Do they really? Not that I was particularly paying attention but I would not have guessed that.
"I thought you'd never get here!" What, the plot?
How annoying is that gratuitous cleavage shot? #monsterdon
#Monsterdon every time i see morpho i think kenneth brannagh's hamlet
Patented Frankenstein karate! Hikeeba!
#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein
@Terencio It was certainly a great #monsterdon movie.
2 beds??? #monsterdon
And the winner for worst rubber bat in a #monsterdon film is #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein
It all goes to show that once it's staked the job's not done 'til you've cut off the head, burnt it and the body, and tossed the ashes into four non-communicating rivers.
(No, RIver Tam doesn't count.)
Oh hey, Draco has a peacock on the castle grounds apparently.
Meh, I've seen better bat TF in furry art.
this generic evil Alfred Hitchcock writes shaking his whole body
#monsterdon
How is there 28 minutes of this left?
Oh, two measures from Night on Bald Mountain. Ok then. #Monsterdon
Note: if the bite marks are this close together. You were not attacked by a vampire, but rather by bugs bunny.
#monsterdon
you're gonna need more coffins for more vampires, Dr. Frankenstein.
Seems weird that Frank's minion would be burning perfectly good body parts. #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein
OMG now they have TWO rubber bats!
#Monsterdon
I am glad I wasn't the Lady-in-Red actor's neighbour while she was practicing her lines.
Arrggh. Eeeeek. Arghhh. Wahhhh!
βAnd now the battle begins.β What film is this even from? #Monsterdon
@brooke among the undead the skin of the eyelids is particularly sensitive to light, it's important to protect them with uv-resistant mascara
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE THEME INCO... oh goddammit
I hate those goddamn bats. They look like they're made out of paper bags. #Monsterdon
but wait, they'll need to recruit some elves to build more coffins.... #monsterdon
And by "host" he means two. Two vampires. #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein
Ahhhh, Day-for-night vampires.
It sounds like a tardis approaches.
Maybe it will go back in time and stop this movie from being filmed.
@RamenCatholic I switched to headphones just in case
damn, look at the fangs on her-- i mean... #monsterdon
iβll just get out of my carriage and talk to this monster what could go wrong #Monsterdon
So this latest brown-haired woman was bitten by a vampire - why is her neck so pristine? #monsterdon
I do think it's a reflection of how direly terrible this film is that the #monsterdon feed is making me laugh a lot tonight.
Camera pans down to breasts. Breasts are still covered. Why did the cameraman pan the camera there?
Igor and Dracula look blazed out of their gords. #Monsterdon
now she has to pimples/niples were the bite shoud be. Weird!
#monsterdon
#Monsterdon vampirism causes a marked increase in mascara coverage
My thoughts exactly, Tusky.
#monsterdon
#Monsterdon so, this movie is gonna pass the Bechdel test, right?
Whatβs the scream to talk ratio in this ?
#Monsterdon
@Configures They're trying their best.
![[empty]](/media/avatars/287224a269fbaefbc7e94920b207f9dca8b6e0415d818373c9f1528359b6a0e8.jpg){kind=small}
There are actually maybe 4 scenes in this whole film, just re-done from different angles, and different actors
#Monsterdon this director has an eyeball fetish like quentin tarantino likes feet
Heβs got the new Orgazmo 2.0. #Monsterdon
#monsterdon Show of hands who has a shared wall with neighbors who are certain you're watching a porn film. Also this might be the first TUBI version I've ever heard where the commercials are actually quieter than the _background music_ of the film...
The sound department, depicted here, later worked on Laserblast (1978) #monsterdon
Those aren't fang marks, it's just dried tabasco #monsterdon
I've always been impressed by Frankenstein's innovative fighting techniques. #Monsterdon
again on horse riding. I hope we don't have a closeup on the horse's ass again
#monsterdon
Sooooooooooo many titty shots
#Monsterdon
@paco @huronbikes At least we hope, I don't like the other explanation! #Monsterdon
@paco @josh0 @Zerofactorial I'll have what she's having
Dr Frankenstein, did you consider just paying a young woman for some blood, rather than, say, kidnapping the highly popular sexy cabaret dancer who everyone (and I mean the men) will now burn down your lab to rescue?
lady you're a vampire. Turn into a bat or something. #monsterdon
Under the circumstances I kind of think two women screaming in the same scene should satisfy the Bechdel test π€¦