"Grunt, grunt, grunt..."
"Grunt...?"
"Grunt, grunt, grunt."
"Danny... here... do you speak Grunt?"

#Monsterdon

You know, I'm prepared to accept that Seward is probably intended to be our protagonist, and Frankenstein the antagonist,

but I literally could not tell you a single actual thing about either character.

Like, these people are CYPHERS. #Monsterdon

honestly have _any_ two people talked to each other in this movie before literally this moment?

#monsterdon #draculaprisoneroffrankenstein

@Zerofactorial

Can I get that on Etsy?

#Monsterdon

@Taweret I’ve said this before, but 70s movies and 70s porn are but two sides of the same coin. #Monsterdon

@wohali I nominate this comment for best #Monsterdon post of the movie 🍿

@TerryHancock Subtitle: "(anxious music continues)" #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

@moira when franky smashed his ride and stole maria (?) #monsterdon

There, I put a sling on his arm and now when he wakes up he'll think he has a broken arm! April Fool's!!!!!!

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon Wait how come the gypsy woman didn't get turned into a vampire?

Yes, lady, those are certainly all nouns. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon ok they're just kidnapping people to turn them into vampires

this is the most pretentions experimental piece of smoking shit I ever watched
#monsterdon

This latest vampire attack could have been avoided by installing a basic home security system. smh #monsterdon

I could not give a fuck whether the doctor character lives or dies, the same for all of them.....except the bat.

#Monsterdon

Where is Frankenstein getting the money to pay for all these coffins?
#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

@davesdogmaggie I have 22 minutes left (no commercials). #Monsterdon

"We better get help" spoken with all the urgency of "could you pass the salt" #Monsterdon

They didn’t explain it earlier, but it appears these folk are the Romani people, and now their presence in the film makes more sense.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon
Oh no, the ominous singing...

performing a kata? #monsterdon

OH good, they give them a zap. Because their energy levels in this are so very low. #monsterdon

Dr. Sewer is alive! #monsterdon

My working hypothesis is that the boom mic operator was trampled by a horse right as filming started and they didn't realize that there was no in scene audio recorded. So they had to add all the dialogue afterward in editing, and filled in the gaps with LOUD ORCHESTRA and ALL THE FOLEY. #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

@hollie True fact: I have never heard a dead person complain about weak abs or dry eyes. #monsterdon

Not sure what all the humming is about
#monsterdon

Dr Seward
Dr Seward....

oh, oh, oh Dr Seward.

#monsterdon

[HUMMING INTENSIFIES] #monsterdon

Lighting-candles-guy looks like he has spray-on hair #monsterdon

@springdiesel poor sister, she's getting quite the baptism by fire, this is rough even by #Monsterdon standards!

@hollie Aaassss you wiiishhh? #WrongMovie #Monsterdon

This music makes me think the film needs dwarves. The mining kind. #Monsterdon

Huh? #Monsterdon

Why they give electric shocks on the newly created vampires? Only to who is the boss?
#monsterdon

So wait, the Roma people are actually heroes since Frankenstein said they were working against him. That's god to know
#monsterdon

OK movie. I laughed when I saw the couple strapped to two beds, writhing in unison. I don't know if that's what you were going for but it's the first reaction you've elicited other than annoyance or contempt. #monsterdon

@sealawyer fam u should watch "Sinners", it KILLS. #monsterdon

that's a lie, actually it was the lullaby these nice people are singing to him. how kind! #monsterdon

okay i must've zoned out, when did dr. s get murderised?

#monsterdon #draculaprisoneroffrankenstein

Sister, "Her puncture marks look like velcro."

#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

He’s got food all over his face! #Monsterdon

Anyone else rather be watching the intense drama and energy of a slice of baloney and American cheese curling in the microwave right now?

#monsterdon

Out-of-focus Frankenstein! #Monsterdon

this movie put Dr Seward to sleep. #monsterdon

I kind of want to watch a good vampire movie now
#monsterdon

@Taweret monochrome sterdon!

#monsterdon

I'm not sure why the Igor is doing that zapping thing, so I'm going to assume that it somehow keeps the vampire's under Frankenstein's control.

#Monsterdon

Still mad they burned the redhead instead of turning her
#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon shoulda set a safe word

The couple that preys together, stays together?

#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

So, Doc Frankestein didn't saw this other coffin right there?
#monsterdon

(somber group humming)

#Monsterdon

@Crazypedia @Taweret Can we imagine making any character from this movie into a meme?

No

#Monsterdon

Introducing Vampire Dana Scully. (Who is this character? Have we ever seen them before?
#monsterdon

I have to say, the Doctor's Wall of Sound is pretty minimalist. You think maybe he was one of the first trance artists? Wub wub noises and screaming. #Monsterdon

There's the situp scene from the trailer #monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

WatchVibe (TM)

Girl's Meaning Questioning⬆️
Bat Realism ⬇️
Harpsichord/Gong Combo Mood ⬆️

When I was a kid I remember these little comic booklets they had at the bible book store. There was a vampire one. Anybody remember these? #monsterdon

she’s always in bed #Monsterdon

@brooke I guess their blood is being used to drown more bats.

#Monsterdon

@moira That would make for a fun #monsterdon probably.. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0385639

They didn’t have microphones while filming this, did they? #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon
Very thoughtful, the rope rigging to keep the coffin doors from crashing loudly when they open. Clearly some vamp foresight going on.

Oh no, Lady Vampire #1 is going to find out Dracula and Lady Vampire #2 went out to eat without her #Monsterdon

This dracula seems more like a disgusting, barely ambulatory corpse than the usual movie vampire.

#Monsterdon

Is Lady Dracula 1 jealous that there is a Lady Dracula 2?
#Monsterdon

Hooves again!!!

#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

@moira "And there was death in that movie theater. And the death was ours."

#monsterdon

Acting is mostly done with the eyes. As this movie clearly demonstrates. #Monsterdon

@ranjit "Oh, little Bobby Frankenstein went to camp, Jenny's riding the bicycle, oh Uncle Victor raised an army of the dead! He always was just like grandpa." #Monsterdon

There's not that much movie left, and yet there seems to be a lot to get done. #Monsterdon

@Taweret I'm enjoying this movie more now that I'm thinking about it being an elaborate form of punishment from the Devil Girl

#Monsterdon

I’m going to have to watch Manos The Hands of Fate to cleanse my finely honed cinematographical palette when this is over. #Monsterdon

This movie is like an inverse Bechdel test.

#Monsterdon

Is the woman vampire who is not Maria, part of the host? So are there 3, is she under his power too?

Do I care?

Actually, never mind.

#monsterdon

tbf I imagine Swingers do live a lot like Vampires.... #Monsterdon

#monsterdon No matter how much she came, she was never moist.

#Monsterdon 🧛 ⛓️ 🧟‍♂️ 😱

Literally all movement in this film takes at least 3-4x as long as it should take

(except for the horsies, who trot at perfect speed and amplitude)

Is this woman a different vampire?

What is even going on?

#Monsterdon

Dracula looks young, but his eyebrows betray his age

#monsterdon

Looks like some vampire's got a case of the Mondays. #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

This journal entry voiceover seems pretty unaware that the monster is an area boss in Laboratory, and that Frank is unequivocally Drac's subordinate ally. #Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

Stand off! Frankenstein in the road #Monsterdon

"She's saying something. Move closer."
< Agggghh... >
"what did she say?"
"Your knee is in my chest..."

#Monsterdon

@ramsey Norovirus #monsterdon

They're multiplying like bats!

#monsterdon
#DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

@CactuarJoe it's for his family holiday newsletter

#monsterdon

Wait a minute, those scabs weren't there before #monsterdon

@socketwench HOW. HOW?!

#monsterdon #draculaprisoneroffrankenstein

mfer looks like Daniel Craig after he rubs Jeremy Renner's hot sauce in his eyes #monsterdon

Was that blood gravy?? #monsterdon

My guy, the blood goes in your mouth, not your eyes.

#Monsterdon

We got some couple on couple vampire action! #Monsterdon

They need to replace all the bat whistles with Brett Goldstein yelling "WHISTLE!"

#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

Dracula looks like he desperately needs medical attention and to sleep for a month
#monsterdon

So they moved Maria in with Dracula... Where's Blondie?

#Monsterdon #DraculaPrisonerOfFrankenstein

We're never going to find out what the girl vampire's deal is, are we. #Monsterdon

What's with the diaper coffins
#Monsterdon

"congrats! you've now been recruited in the Frankenstein Army -- Dracula corps!" #monsterdon

death coffin

the coffin that eats

#monsterdon #draculaprisoneroffrankenstein