My mom was shocked she was in the film. Our best guess as to why was maybe she was trying to pay for a grandkid in college #Monsterdon

Well that was a movie. Which makes it better than last week.
But also it was a *cough* Bog standard monster fishman movie.
This might be out most forgettable movie in a while. Which is not something I can say for last week's shitty Dracula Frankenstein Wolfman confusion.
#Monsterdon #Bog

@JoeWynne My son says he’s holding out hope for a Bog 2 with all the baby bog creatures.

#Monsterdon

"THEN WHAT?" THEN WHAT?

Pop the bubblewrap! Pop the fucking bubblewrap!

#monsterdon

Well. I, uh, guess that's over. #Monsterdon

It is never The End on #monsterdon. But it can be The End?

Big movie for fans of watching things almost move #Monsterdon

points were redeemed by the blood scent generator trash bag costume reveal and the red suit costume #monsterdon

That had to have been about something other than the existence of a murderous lake creature left over from the ice age. But What? Why was it made? Thanks for the laughs #monsterdon crew. Take care. See ya soon.

Oh fuck off with 'more eggs'

#Monsterdon

HA HA HA OH MY GOD

THE CAR CRASH XD XD XD

Poor bastard's acrylic paint went up in FLAMES! XD XD #Monsterdon

And now, the Boggy Creek Choir. #Monsterdon

"Jensen, he's headed for the bog!"

lmao he's a bog monster dude of course he's headed for the bog

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon I swear the Bog Monster costume was the silhouette of a Sunflora

@Taweret this is only Pt 1 as well..

#Monsterdon

"Brad look! A shoe!"

Cinderella!? #Monsterdon

I see they're keeping the creature alive with a grocery store lettuce mister #Monsterdon

This movie is man against nature but where nature just wants a healthy, fulfilling relationship

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

given the track record of this movie, they are introducing this icthyologist to squeeze in one last threesome scene with the doctors for absolutely no reason #monsterdon

Oh, the monster's full of pistachio cream. #Monsterdon

"Suppose you let _me_ decide what looks fish-like, hmm?"

buddy you may be an ichthyologist and a last-minute character introduction but you hardly have a monopoly on fish resemblance spotting

#monsterdon

I swear to god if the monster turns out to be the bog lady's kid... #Monsterdon

what the fuck the movie is still happening? they just resolved everything #monsterdon

Oh hey, he stole the cop's plane from The Wicker Man #Monsterdon

Hello pantsuit, welcome to the 70s

#Monsterdon

Screaming.
me too, movie, me too.
#monsterdon

#monsterdon Blood Scent Generator sounds like a Yes lyric btw..

“I’ll create a blood scent generator in Visual Basic, see if I can track the monster’s IP address.”

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

omg that monster is tragic....

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon YES to the monster effects!

Neil just went all Leroy Jenkins on them

#Monsterdon

Shout out to my new favorite character, Screaming Country Firetruck.

#monsterdon

"Blood scent generator". #monsterdon

This movie could have half as many scenes and still have the same number of things happen. #monsterdon

Again, this is gonna be like The Giant Spider Invasion and they're gonna forget the flares while the sheriff gets eaten by the monster butt-first. #Monsterdon

@ranjit
Small town. He's also Librarian.
And drives a salt truck in winter.

#Monsterdon

Welp, time to hit the hard liquor.

#monsterdon #bog1979

UNDERWATER CROWS BEAK!? #monsterdon

Good thing they've got the "diver down" flag up on a rowboat in a pond

#monsterdon

Huh, monster laid gacha eggs. #Monsterdon

@Cherizilla It's completely normal to do so. (also, this means you use the snorkel at the surface to save air)

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

immersive rowboat action

#Monsterdon

"You could have just siad 'what if it's something from the ice age'. I didn't need the 4 minute clarification." #monsterdon

OMG, we actually saw a bit of monster!!! #Monsterdon

The arrival of the Sherriff's two combat helpers, whoever they are, gives me opening-of-PREDATOR feelings. like, that, but low budget

#Monsterdon

Never seen a white cop from the sticks that happy to see a Black man before, this movie is fantasy....

....I'm shipping them.

The bog will spare their Queer lives, it only feeds on Straights

#Monsterdon

In the high school science lab, complete with fake skeleton (yay), the science lady and the science gentleman talk about how the monster put an anti-coagulant into its victims bloodstream. The science lady shows the science gentleman her microscope (which is pointed at slime), and they conclude that the monster is made of cancer. Crystal cancer. That walks, I guess.

#monsterdon

Eets Naht a Tumor #Monsterdon

#monsterdon The Gentry are apparently used to Bog Explosions..

I extremely like how Science Lady has a giant poster of the moon on the wall of her office.

#monsterdon

"Down goes Corky!" #monsterdon

He running out of deputies to burn #monsterdon

“It’s a block of the new Acura RDX.” #Monsterdon #Bog1979

WHY THAT ZOOM ON HIS FACE

#monsterdon #bog1979

"While we were drinking last night, I had the idea that as explosives got us into this mess....perhaps they could get us out? Also, I woke up and my pants were off...."

#Monsterdon

Sherriff's solution to protect the lake and people near it is to kill everything in the lake

Yea, that checks out.

#Monsterdon

Seriously. Fuck you movie. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Please cock block them right now Bog Monster this is PAINFUL

what the fuck is going on #monsterdon

oh get the hose D: #Monsterdon

The love theme from the Bog
#monsterdon

Oh noooo are they playing the opening song in the background?

#monsterdon #bog1979

oh, are these two, uh... oh. #monsterdon

I wanna sample this bog witch's monologue to fall asleep to.

#monsterdon #bog1979

Okay can we be in the story the Bog Witch is setting up. It seems way cooler than this show in a sheriff's log cabin.
#Monsterdon #Bog

"hypodeemic nerdle"

*snort*

#Monsterdon

this is a terrible movie, but with an awesome swamp hag

#monsterdon

"Doc what the hell do we have out there?"

You have a bog that could install a pretty nice IV line in a pinch

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

Man, imagine if they'd made the witch look like this ON PURPOSE #Monsterdon

Adrianna is a bog witch!

(Why is there a bog witch in this movie?)

#monsterdon

Does anything cost a dollar anymore? When I was a kid a buck got you a game of space invaders, two plays on the jukebox and a Payday bar. We(human beings) actually paid for things with change at one time. When was the last time you used change to buy something? It was so big at one time they had machines yuo could put bills in and get it back in quarters. I'm totally serious. #monsterdon

Adriana's script was missing every fourth word and all punctuation

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

Yes, just enter the hobo's stinky palace, I'm sure this won't be creepy at all. #Monsterdon

Whoa, his suit blends in with the brick wall behind him. He's a taupe chameleon! #Monsterdon

I am expecting duelling banjos....

#Monsterdon

Oh NO, a COP DIED

How

Terrible

#Monsterdon

"It makes absolutely no sense!"

"So what does make sense?"

NOT THIS SCRIPT THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE

#Monsterdon

was that THREE competing gun dealers in the single gun store? #monsterdon

"Could we have a... Dracula running loose out there?"

_orchestra sting_

BOGCULA‽

(MONSTER CHOMP PART QUATRO, aww, we're down one man from the search party)

#monsterdon

She seems so unbothered and moisturized for someone who just completed an autopsy on two young women #monsterdon #bog1979

70s COP VIOLENCE

CINEMA VERITE, GENTLEMEN

#Monsterdon

"The boat's registered to a guy named Potter, a poacher I've been after for years. Uses a DuPont lure for his fish."

"A what?"

"Dynamite."

Wait just one dang second, does the DuPont chemical company manufacture dynamite?? I legitimately did not know that.

#monsterdon

A load of white dudes from the American South wandering around a wood with rifles makes ME uncomfortable....

#Monsterdon

I don’t usually like saying “they’re in a better place” but considering the women are now in the bog away from the men, I guess that would be a fair assumption #monsterdon #bog1979

#monsterdon Theme music: "Hold me soft and warm.." wait, do you know what movie this is?

Already this movie feels dirty, like a VHS snuff movie....

#Monsterdon

and the cut that is what got me to boot up my cutting program, a supercut of the amazing monster noises. favorite is the third segment where the person at the mic is just clearly having so much making these noises

#Monsterdon #BogMonsterNoiseAppreciationSociety

If you're reading this, you're at the tail end of a long stream of posts on the feed about #Monsterdon, a fediverse community movie-watching event.

This week we watched BOG (1979). It is a movie that alternates between frenetic and plodding in a way that *always* feels plodding. It has a delightfully silly monster costume for the bog monster, there is a bog witch, and the single greatest monster-noise sequence I have seen in a Monsterdon flick.

See the post at the top of this thread for more info:

https://hachyderm.io/@SnoopJ/111004128276431553

@SnoopJ Based on the poster, I was expecting more slime #Monsterdon

A sequel should be called "Bog Monster, Prisoner of Piranhas" #monsterdon

well, that was a set of scenes put to film, i guess. points for the bog witch, the bog monster's costume, and literally nothing else. #monsterdon

Okay, well anyway, our fleet of car rectangles catches up to the bog monster, which has kidnapped the science lady. We kill it with fire.

Then the underwater camera that we paid for goes through the bogweed forest again and finds more monster eggs, which the voice over explains that they will hatch into more monsters and eat more people.

Then the credits roll and we get more lovey dovey music. It reminds me of Enka but less colorful and in English.

#monsterdon

We have The Creature From the Black Lagoon at home.

#Monsterdon #Bog1979

I take back what I said - Yeti was the shittiest monster. This is one #2

#monsterdon

He seems awfully blasé about the big monster abducting the woman whose neck he's been sucking for the last 70 minutes #Monsterdon

They actually did

"The End ?"

Fuck them

#Monsterdon

I have questions on why the bog monster would need humans for its reproductive cycle. There wouldn't be humans in North America before maybe 20,000 BC or so, what did its ancestors do back then?

Can the bog monster maybe also infuse non-human hosts?

#monsterdon

Wait so the last standing cop did a suicide run into monster?

#monsterdon

I've heard people snore like the monster growls

#Monsterdon

holy fuck the monster noises have me cackling that was the best

#Monsterdon