Arranged marriages are hard! #Monsterdon

Dad is actually talking about a Chess Game.

#monsterdon

This is the worst couples therapy ever
#monsterdon

"But I don't want to start smelling of ammonia and having my body dissociate as my babies eat their way out!"

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Lie back and think of ~~England~~ Atlantis

Also, ick

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Uhhh... guys... what happened to the homicidal Atlanteans who stabbed the Frog Man?

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

YES VIAN PLEASE COMMIT THEM ONE, AND ALL, TO THE SEA

yes please, commit them all to the sea. #monsterdon

The patriarch mandates mating #monsterdon

Wait. The peals are merman ejaculate and this is how they reproduce.

#monsterdon #beyondatlantis

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

I want the seahorse statue!

Oh you thought we were done swimming?! WE’RE NOT #monsterdon

WHY are the mer people doing this? Bait the trap, kill them and move on.

#monsterdon #beyondatlantis

"All the pearls can't look the same, we need some variety!" [throws in exactly three non-identical set pearls] "Okay, job done."

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Nereus and Sirene are the only non-incestuously-born fish people, of course.

#Monsterdon

Sirene, Sirene, Sirene, Sireeeene
How often can you fool them with your clams

#monsterdon

Incest isn't how you get beneficial adaptations, but thanks for bringing it up, I guess #monsterdon

'Murigao: Where "The Male Gaze" meets "The Innsmouth Look".'

#monsterdon

Obviously, lady. If you knew more, you'd get out of this movie. #Monsterdon

The acting here was Shatner-esque. Truly inspired.

#Monsterdon

THE SECRET OF THE FISHFUCKERS

#monsterdon

HAHAHA he asked what we were all thinking! Why don't they all have special eyes? #Monsterdon

Purchase list:

One fighting rooster

Several broads

Dang, all the men in this movie are trash #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon fishman with a goat

welll uh

so much for goat

"...how do you account for their eyes?"
"Must be from inbreeding."
"Huh, so they're royalty."

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

"Incest?"

"Hmmm"

#Monsterdon

Could you make your connection more ... conCRETE? wakka wakka wakka #monsterdon

Aaaaaaaugh, they're minoans

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Even if you do got it, I probably don't want it, Eddie. #monsterdon #beyondatlantis

@amyfou Surely you're not just realizing this now 😛

#Monsterdon

COFFEE

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

honestly this movie is not at all a good movie

@SnoopJ Only When Convenient Camera #monsterdon

@ottaross That’s ‘cause it was back when academics made a living wage, even before getting tenure #Monsterdon

Pretty into cocks for a straight guy. #Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

See this chief dude is far too diplomatic I would already be like "mind your own business you nosy little fuckers" #Monsterdon

I bet 90% of the out takes for this thing are the actors cracking up over those stupid eye prosthetics. #Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

she probably should have taken a picture of that statue, first. unclear if the camera is just not part of the movie now or what

#Monsterdon

that's right folks, don't get off the ride track. #monsterdon

"That convinced her, right? Sure. I'm so good at this."

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Baby goat? Is this a Severance thing? #Monsterdon

What the heck??? First the roosters, now the goat???

Boo, movie #Monsterdon

The fish people must be pretty understaffed if the *king* has to pull guard duty

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

ZZtop "Pearl necklace" starts up #BadMovie #Monsterdon

Oh, right, plot. (that mask from the museum)

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

in 70s movies everyone is just damp and untrustworthy

#Monsterdon

PUT THE MASK ON NOW. #Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

First actual good outfit sighting.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

but why did he have a bb goat?

Where is Octoman when we need him?

#Monsterdon

Oh right! That was the thing aside from the stupid fish eyes that struck me about this movie. Anthropology lady's black and white outfit is a great fit. I need to steal the clothes for some character design.
#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Wait, did he just throw a goat into a piranha pond?

#Monsterdon

wtf did that goat do to you #monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Practice, baby

#monsterdon

I was a little curious, so I looked up the director. Freddie Romero is credited as the director of some 66 films from 1947 to 2008 #monsterdon

Well, I suppose that's one way to indicate the conversation is over. Just chuck a goat into a piranha pond.

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

the FUCK?

#monsterdon

goat: yeeted

#Monsterdon

oi! goat-kun! #monsterdon

WELP #Monsterdon

GO ON, TELL THAT COLONIZER fam!!! #monsterdon

Silly frogman. You can't out swim fish people. #Monsterdon

"No you can NOT pet my goat"
*turns away*

#monsterdon

FEAR MY GOOGLE EYES

#monsterdon

The goat's the best character so far. #Monsterdon

You know what this film needs right now?

#monsterdon

"No, I WON'T show you my pet monkey!" #monsterdon

HEY HOW COME WE NEVER GET LINGERING ASS SHOTS OF THE DIVERS #monsterdon

So

Much

Swimming

#monsterdon

Those oysters may be great for pearls but they appear to be meat-less so won't do well at the oyster bar. (Plus they seem to be clams)

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

Shot on screen: Slowly picking pearls out of clams

The soundtrack: OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ MATRIX MATRIX MATRIX #Monsterdon

I grabbed the highres version I also have and it's different music that actually fits the rest of the music.

So this is probably copyright strike avoidance rather than rights loss

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Out of all the mistakes the director of the film has made, maybe the biggest one was placing so much faith in his soundtrack. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

why haven't they murdered these men with their spears already tho

The underwater score vs. the above-water score but both keep changing

#monsterdon

the 70s must've been horrible. like the 2020s are horrible but imagine it with indoor smoking and no video games

#Monsterdon

It was Very Important for the people who made this #Monsterdon to establish that Fish People have superior posteriors

Someday the divers will find that synth player...

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

you're a fish girl,
and you're gonna get pearls

but you know it don't matter anyway

#monsterdon

The ever-shifting soundtrack.

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Sirene, Sirene, Sirene, Sireeeene
I'm begging of you, please don't raid my clams

#monsterdon

#monsterdon blonde’s wavy sideburns are distracting

#monsterdon If she's not careful, she's going to pluck the Pearl of Venus, which of course will be a keystone macguffin that will GIVE US A PLOT TO FOLLOW.

@Zerofactorial @jeffron
We could do a documentary as a change of pace one week.
Or there is a fake Loch Ness documentary with Werner Herzog out there...
#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon I had no idea pearl diving was so easy.

#monsterdon 42:00 Legally distinct Claire de Lune

#Monsterdon soundtrack: Vince Guaraldi Mode Engaged

the 70s geochache scene was actually kinda cool ngl

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

I like how Sirene's fake fur bikini looks like absolute shit underwater #monsterdon

If you've ever wondered why they never seem to have underwater fight scenes this #Monsterdon demonstrates why

#monsterdon Underwater savage fight. Nows the time to pick out continuity errors, like spotting a Indiana license plate. Yes, underwater, yes, off the coast of the Phillipines. That's normal, yeah?

#Monsterdon so how come the one lady has regular eyes

...they skipped to the funeral? Wat?

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

I wonder what West Eddie is up to

#monsterdon
#BeyondAtlantis

MURMAIDER MURMAIDER MURMAIDER MURMAIDER #monsterdon

#monsterdon Subtitles are kinda on point. Moody music. Music intensifies. I mean, we can call it music, but honestly it's spelled Muzak, right?

ugh, an underwater fight scene now.....

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon The budget's underwater on this film..