I just logged back on after several hours and found all the #Monsterdon posts.
It's like waking up to find the remains of a party the previous night that seems like it might have been of fun but also involved some poor judgement and regret.

people in 50s movies never look all oily and sweaty, people in 80s movies don't look oily and sweaty. what the hell was going on in the 70s

#Monsterdon

Tonight, my timeline is full of #monsterdon

I've said this before, but I'mo re-up it.

I love monsterdon nights, even tho I don't participate.

I don't have to love everything that people do to love the simple fact that they do it, and in doing it form community.

Keep it up, my friends!

Your supporters are legion. Maybe . . . *too* legion . . .

<bad-special-effect-melted-face-grin/>

Hmm. Seems like our protagonists have gotten themselves into a real...

#Monsterdon

one thing about 70s movies, they sure make people in the 70s seem horrible

#Monsterdon

Keeping myself entertained with Gamera GIFs #monsterdon

I get it now! The filmmakers made the movie slow ON PURPOSE so that I could read all the #Monsterdon posts!

Sirene, you’re a fine girl
What a good wife you would be
But my life, my love and my lady
Is the sea
#Monsterdon

Call me cynical but this sequence feels like it might just be an excuse to film her butt. #Monsterdon

Me: At least the music can’t get any worse.
Composer: Hold my musical saw.
#Monsterdon

#monsterdon

#monsterdon i get the feeling the producers didn’t get that Jacques Cousteau internship they desperately wanted, so they turned to a life of underwater soft porn

A movie without a single sympathetic character, rampant murder, no comeuppance and nothing achieved. lol

#Monsterdon

Kill hundreds of fish people but kill one white blonde lady and everyone stops.....

#Monsterdon

Hoping there is a scene where the masseuse stabs the crime lord to death in a toilet.

#Monsterdon

All the worlds are yours except the mask temple. Attempt no landings there. #Monsterdon

I just wanna know more about the mid-fifties paunchy office worker guy who got a spear in the back for visiting the island right at the start.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon The real pearls are the wise lessons we.. oh god.

#monsterdon You've heard of a shotgun wedding? Well this is a speargun wedding..

#monsterdon Fuck you after what you did to that goat.

I'm very glad @dantheclamman is not here to see these cinematic bivalve crimes #monsterdon

What percentage of the number of frames in this film contain butts, I wonder. #monsterdon

I feel like I'm catching an STI watching this movie....it's so.....grubby

#Monsterdon

Atlantis : Beyond Atlantis :: meat : Beyond Meat

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon wow if we had a rating system, i’d go all eurovision Nulle on their asses with zero points

Definitely 70s. Definitely cheesy. Some soothing underwater scenes. Not nearly enough Atlantis. Pretty fun, really, till they started killing people at the end. Ah well. Thanks, as always, @Taweret and co. #Monsterdon

So was he sperm-jacked or what?

Ah who cares.

#Monsterdon

Um, if they’re of a different species that’s a major obstacle to mating with one of them. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon LMAO el pelotón de gente tryna leave the bar. you know it’s the 1970s cuz nobody is afraid to bitch slap a cop

#monsterdon You brought a gun to a crab fight.

Apparently she’s the only one who can talk to that guy like Sigourney Weaver and the computer in Galaxy Quest. #Monsterdon

All right, I’m more interested now that there’s a curatorial subplot. #Monsterdon

Is it my face blindness or are these two guys identical? #Monsterdon

Chekhov’s cock

#monsterdon

Movie Facts: This is the sequel to Bed Atlantis and Bath Atlantis

#monsterdon

@paco @ottaross "I want a scuba diving holiday in the Philippines....some shit about Atlantis.....make it grubby"

#Monsterdon

@Lazarou *record scratch* I suppose you're wondering how I ended up in this situation.

#Monsterdon

Not enough characters in that movie died.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon genocide barbie

#monsterdon the girl slapping music is from mutual of omaha wild kingdom

#monsterdon do they ever explain the eyes? and now the cannibsl fish eat bugeyed who fed them a baby something earlier. why are these gringos surviving? none of them is likeable.

@strangefour I never want to see scuba diving or pearls again.

Next Week: "Oyster Lords Of Lemuria (1978)"

#Monsterdon

"Cannibal fish!"

Nobody in this film understands ichthyology

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Okay, someone pencil in a Godzilla-Shark-Hybrid-Kaiju thing, have it eat the cast, and then throw an The End card but make it really fast, like only on screen for at most, 2 seconds.

Needs more sea slugs

#monsterdon

oh what a dumb film
#monsterdon

#monsterdon aaaaah! the funky 1970s flute music

"How can we know we can trust her"

Just think with your dick, you know you want to.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon this movie smells of chicken shit and polyester

Ewwww, 70s pickup lines....

Every male character in this movie is a sex tourist

#Monsterdon

everything looks so mustardy

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon OMG THEY DO END THE MOVIE LAUGHING. WTAF 😳

#monsterdon the ACAB scientist barbie killed the little mermaid but feels really bad about it 😒

#monsterdon they cut corners on all the production just so they could have that one explosion

#monsterdon they’re ready to go and bitch has to go wander one more time to the cannibal fish

They were already in the sea when the movie ended, so classic Monsterdon ending.

Abrupt, and wet

#Monsterdon

So, now they're *all* fucking off into the sea.

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon amazing how box is almost full of pearls and it ain’t enough. it’s almost like the movie is tryna tell us something 🤔

#monsterdon baldy better get it. he’s an asshat.

#monsterdon This is not how sex works.

#monsterdon i just need for the chulo de puta merkin guy to die

"Are you okay"
"Yeah sure, I'm fine except for the ruptured eardrums."
"Whew, as long as it's nothing serious."

#Monsterdon

@overholt This is far too high-quality a parody for this movie

I'm not even watching the movie and I can tell

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon So we're going to queue the Midsommar-style man-essence-collecting death-by-snu-snu.

@SRLevine lol, 'incels are a different species'

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Y’ALL! the soundtrack is basically the precursor to EDM. prEDM if you will.

Somebody quit so I picked upa shift tonight so I'm not doing #monsterdon, but I might watch the movie tomorrow unless I sleep all day which I might rather do.

#monsterdon Honestly the gratuitous underwater closeups of the women are the only thing remotely holding my interest..

@CactuarJoe oh god, I hope there isn't a sex scene in this movie.....

#Monsterdon

🚨🚨🚨ALERT: Sideburns sensors are reaching unprecedented levels! 🚨🚨🚨
#monsterdon

"Stay where you are, don't anybody move"

Everyone keeps moving

fuck the police

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon This movie could, and should, be completely run off the projector and Godzilla should take it's place. Or, Godzilla can eat all the cast. I'm fine with either!

If he took a dump right now on that toilet, this movie would be improved #monsterdon

I’m having PTSD flashbacks to “The Aztec Mummy vs the Wrestling Women”

#monsterdon

Animals may have been harmed in the making of this movie

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

@paco @jsadow @Violinknitter
"OK listen: Raiders of the Lost Ark meets The Little Mermaid. A bunch of guys go looking for rare pearls on an island where the natives are half fish. There's a love triangle, underwater sex, betrayals, a gun fight, and we can even blow up half the native town. Whatdayasay?!?" #monsterdon

#monsterdon i grew up in an island but even for me this is too much sand and sea water

The moral of the story is… capitalism is cannibal fish and workers are the goat 🐐 🐠

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Thank you @Taweret for a lovely bit of laughter at the expense of too many pairs of 1973 bell bottoms.

#monsterdon That whole movie was best left face down in the water.

#monsterdon Ah the humor of losing everything! They all fucked off (into the sea)..

#monsterdon Have the pearls, but please do not distrub her funerary salad.

And THAT's why you shouldn't invite tourists to mate with your daughter

#monsterdon

Chekhov’s cannibal fish #monsterdon

#monsterdon ewww. what’s it called when the patriarchal piece of shit forces his daughter to get inseminated? rape by proxy?

This is like they made a Bond film and then removed every scene that had anything interesting happening. #monsterdon

The guy is basically wearing a full-body neoprene condom, there's not going to be much mating success there.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon now i have no idea if what am listening to is the original soundtrack or a fake one by whomever uploaded it to Youtube

Is that a theremin? Finally! #monsterdon

For pete's sake, if we're going to spend this whole movie staring at butts they could at least give them some speaking lines. #monsterdon

Every male character in this movie can die

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Every dad has to have the mating talk with his daughter eventually..

#monsterdon I'm just making a lot of *racist* guesses..

#monsterdon WHOA! what’s with the conceptual electro music?

Imagine if these synths were diegetic

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon The underwater scenes were very hard on the pianist.

The budget they could've spent on a sound guy was blown on the underwater filming guy.

#Monsterdon

Blonde lady just fucking off into the sea, done with this movie....

#Monsterdon

@yatsu This is the toot that makes me wish I was doing #monsterdon tonight.

Director: We spent all our money on blow and baby oil so the village people will need to wear fun-fur swimsuits

Head of wardrobe: 👁️👁️

#monsterdon