#monsterdon A gross laugh, moist chest hair, and thou..

I hate 70s values

#monsterdon

#monsterdon God damn it! No cock fighting ...

oh nice, 'cock fighting' ....all the cultural delights....

(not those sort of cocks sadly)

#Monsterdon

Okay - that should come with a viewer warning. :(

#Monsterdon

Can’t we just get beyond Atlantis? #Monsterdon

[swims around quietly snipping off all the sequel hooks]

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

@kshernandez hahaha was it particularly horrid? Idk what #Monsterdon is at all i muted the tag lol I never see anyone talking about it 😂

The book was much better.

#Monsterdon

@blogdiva gill necks would have looked less ridiculous, but they went with fish eyes....🤷‍♂️

They all laugh about wiping out a culture and stealing, then losing their treasure, they can all go to hell.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

thanks #Monsterdonians we couldn't've made it without you all

thanks @Taweret and @Cherizilla and @JoeWynne for hosting/bingo/trivia

we all need those googly eye goggles 👀 is what I got out of this one

"We don't care about pearls any more. All we want now is crypto" #monsterdon

@trixter On the bright side, the guy who punched that mermaid princess and told her to mate, that guy probably got shot. #monsterdon

I told yall this was a bad movie. Others tried to warn us. But no. We had to try to get Beyond Atlantis. And what did that get us? SCUBA DIVING.
#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

a freeze frame of everyone laughing is really the end?

Why are you consoling her—she’s a murderer #Monsterdon

#monsterdon THEREMIN!

#monsterdon LMAO they put shoe polish on gringo Blades to make it look like he has some stubble

those two white leads turning on each other are that spiderman meme

#Monsterdon

"Stand back everyone....he's ACTING"

#Monsterdon

soooo, she didn't mate

#monsterdon

#monsterdon ah. the anthropologist as spy and snitch.

This is like they made a Bond film and then removed every scene that had anything interesting happening. #monsterdon

what

just HAPPENED

#monsterdon

The Wife Aquatic with Steve Zissou

#monsterdon

Underwater cam scenes are really not as interesting as the director thinks they are
#monsterdon

#monsterdon Send in the crabs... there ought to be crabs..

For pete's sake, if we're going to spend this whole movie staring at butts they could at least give them some speaking lines. #monsterdon

At least they hypothesized incest instead of the fish shagging that they've obviously been doing.
#monsterdon

Daddy commands you to fuck strangers

#monsterdon

oh great, more underwater scenes.....

*reaches for vape

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon WHOA! what’s with the conceptual electro music?

"How do you account for their eyes?"

"They're all related to Marty Feldman."

#Monsterdon

She has many outfits, one, maybe two per scene
#monsterdon

#monsterdon DO NOT TOUCH IT. Do you hear me, filthy British Library! You have taken everything else, but this, you leave this alone! Go back to Cornwall and TAKE YOUR KIPPERS!

#monsterdon so the scientist barbi just talked very slowly in jinglish they totally understood her

Fear my insensitivity to small animals!

#monsterdon

The budget they could've spent on a sound guy was blown on the underwater filming guy.

#Monsterdon

Blonde lady just fucking off into the sea, done with this movie....

#Monsterdon

Yes, fuck off into the ocean and a better movie!

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Why does this ancient and uncontacted island speak English with an American accent?

The worldbuilding here ain't exactly Andor level....

#Monsterdon

“[Guy playing Logan] also thought that the extensive underwater footage slowed down the action, saying, ‘It's gorgeous. But watching it is like watching slow motion.’” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beyond_Atlantis_(film)

#Monsterdon

Please tell me this guy is dying now, I’d like to not see him for the rest of the movie #Monsterdon

This episode of White Lotus is weird.

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

@amyfou yeah, and just replace the soundtrack with early Pink Floyd. Genuine hit. #monsterdon

#monsterdon back in the day, we’d call that baldy un chulo de puta

@blogdiva Playing the part of the bridge tonight, is everyone watching this film <3 #Monsterdon

"Talk to me in ENGLISH"

*beats man

White People abroad....shameful....

#Monsterdon

Women and seamen don’t get along

#monsterdon

I feel like they wanted to make a sexy movie but no. no, this is not that

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🐟 🐡 🐠 🦈 🐬 🦑 🐙 🐳 😱

the mens' polyester shirt game has been pretty striking tho

Wow the audio in this film is really rough.

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon It's valuable, it's oyster poop and this is priceless! Wait until you see a cow poop! Rich beyond the dreams of avarice!

If I have to watch one more minute of this guys hairy boobs being massaged I'm going to throw up.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon A poor man's Joe Don Baker..

Cock fighting is basically just Pokémon for old people, right?
#monsterdon

Animal Abuse!

Gambling!

"Come Visit The Philippines"

#Monsterdon

Aw, THAT’S what they mean by cock fighting? BOOOO

#monsterdon

"You might say I killed him and took over this operation."

Subtle

#Monsterdon

Rated PG: Pimpin’ Galore

#monsterdon

"You go pop for pappa"

Vaginas go dry across the world.

#Monsterdon

She’s the ugly one because she has little eyes

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Getting weird vibes already with the staring and the music..

@kcarr2015 I mean, with 3 or 4 lines of dialogue they could have had an awesome sub-theme. Like the mermaid princess coulda said something about how constrained she is by her position. The scientist coulda said something about how tough it is to be in her field. They coulda had a brief moment of recognition, maybe even the suggestion they wish they could run away together, before they decide it is their destiny to fight. #monsterdon

Beyond Atlantis an in depth review:

It Sucked. At least it had lots of underwater bikini girl butts to get me through it.

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon and they fucked off the pearls onto the sea

@ottaross I'm guessing it was a leaflet? The whole script of this thing could fit on about 4 pages. #monsterdon

Hey, remember that lady who was giving Eastbound Eddie a backrub and then a bath? She wasn't an obvious villain. So there was at least one person in the movie.... #monsterdon

The moral of the story is that a fishnet made of pearls is worth nothing if your parenting skills led your only child to a largely inexplicable death somehow. And they blow up your sacred temple, maybe. All you can do is to walk out into the sea #monsterdon

@msh @Taweret
I feel like all they lost was the ruling family. Don't know what they were going to do about the inbreeding, anyway.
#monsterdon

#monsterdon merkin guy gotta blow things up cuz of course he would

#monsterdon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDZaoPXMTK8

WTH kinda ending? #monsterdon

#monsterdon and everybody's favorite traffic cone is back

This is all the plot resolution you need

#Monsterdon

That was a bizarre ending.

#Monsterdon

Cause we can’t have two female speaking parts in this story #Monsterdon

fortunately it's only like 10 meters down and they have scuba gear, no problem right?

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

Post Scarcity Fish People

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon red head gonna mate with marine Ken and she’s gonna end up being a lost mermaid, ready to perpetuate the species… or sumtin

KAAAAHHHHHHNNNNN!

#Monsterdon

ah wait, sorry, I mean a catfish fight

#Monsterdon

...you choked a person with gills. in the water.

how?

#monsterdon

is she gonna try to mate the scientist girl now? 🥴

#monsterdon

west eddie wouldn't have messed up like this

#monsterdon

#monsterdon The cast needs delousing.

It's day! It's night! It's day!

#Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#Monsterdon heremin, theremin, everywhere a min min

"We need a distraction"

"I'll blow up their Temple"

White people....

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon those are OG Levis

This script peaked with "MotherCrabbers" #Monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

#monsterdon Cannibal fish? How could that species last? They'd just EAT EACH OTHER. You should have said... *gasps* Pirahna!!!!

#monsterdon funny how it’s the "natives" demanding privacy and setting boundaries

#Monsterdon just ... one ... more... score

#monsterdon WTF why did fishboi throw the monkey to the piranha. was it a monkey? have no idea whst kind of mammal it was

they managed to put an unconscious man back in the bottom half of a wet suit? BULLSHIT.

#monsterdon #beyondatlantis

i see people complaining about the unbelievable quantity of scuba shots in this movie, and that is valid criticism for someone who is paying attention to what is going on, but for someone who is not paying attention at all they are the best part of the movie
#monsterdon

@SRLevine Okay, no. More of them just talking about logistics, or a character getting attacked underwater and having to choose between bends and dealing with the merpeople

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

The movie misses a chance to kill a character with a panic ascent

#monsterdon #BeyondAtlantis

"Baby's got the Bends!" 🎵

#Monsterdon