Shed a tear for wounded patriarchy #monsterdon

I love how the general consensus is that the historical stuff came from a different movie because it's way too nice to be made by the same people as the rest of it. WE KNOW HOW THIS WORKS.

#monsterdon

@strangefour pretty much, always a naughty Priest in these things

#monsterdon

"I think our next move is quite obvious right now!"

It would be, if any of this made any goddamn sense. #Monsterdon

"I've never heard anyone talk such utter nonsense." -- The Dragon, in The Wrestling Women vs. the Aztec Mummy (1964) #Monsterdon

"He who removes the breastplate will be under the threat of death..." Isn't everyone? So you take the breastplate, then return it, and now you're immortal?

#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

"I've never heard anyone talk such utter nonsense."

Honestly, can't disagree.

#Monsterdon

First we had to decode this secret only to find out we need to find this old shiny thing?? Oh man!

Yes you BETTER get busy #Monsterdon

FORESHADOWING

BREET BREET BREET

FORESHADOWING

BREET BREET BREET

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

Oh, I guess we have to fight the high priest to find The Aztec Treasure.

#monsterdon

Oh so this mummy was buried alive, which is like the opposite pole of the corpse preparation spectrum? #monsterdon

I desperately want this wood-grain TV with two unmarked knobs on it.

#monsterdon

When does Brendan Fraser show up?

#monsterdon

*waking up from boredom-induced sleep*
"That's a most interesting story doctor"

#Monsterdon

This sounds like an Aztec-ified version of the story of Imhotep...?

#Monsterdon

So imdb informs us this is the *second* movie in the wrestling women series which began with Doctor of Doom #monsterdon

Oh my lord, the actors are also bored #monsterdon

@rallias Either that or tea

#Monsterdon

The chess match is more interesting than the wrestling at least #monsterdon

"the exact spot where the treasure was located"
in her abdomen???
#monsterdon

Ok this part *is* the plot of The Mummy

#Monsterdon

A model city! MINIATURES! We are in familiar territory now.
#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomen #AztecMummy

@RobynGoodfellow reports there's a 1957 movie called "The Aztec Mummy" that he suspects was the source of this footage

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

Our goddess of death? So the others are hanging around too? #monsterdon

It's called Magical Realism, look it up.

#monsterdon

“¿Eres mi momia?” #Monsterdon #TheWrestlingWomenVsTheAztecMummy

#monsterdon Forget the wrestling, I dig the Aztec stuff ñ

#Monsterdon 🤼‍♀️ 🪶 🐲 🤕 😱

I would like that stone dragon sacrificial table for my house please

Y'know, aside from the whole sacrifice thing, that sounds like a pretty good life. I'd like nobody to be allowed to look at me, too. #Monsterdon

al Armando ese ni le llenaron la cara de deos y está en el piso como un pendejo caído

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

this has to be footage from something else. there's no way all that was spent on this movie

#monsterdon

Oooo, historical costumes! Either this is where all their money went or it came from another movie/documentary.

#monsterdon

Wait I don't believe they hired this many extras

#monsterdon

I wonder if this is a clip from a different film, rather than original footage to this one...

#monsterdon

Great (Aztec) balls of fire

#Monsterdon

That is... WAY more extras than I thought this production had the cash for. O_o #Monsterdon

Woo! Aztec flashback/re-enactments!

#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomenVsAztecMummy

yes, ancient pyramids, lets go

#monsterdon

THE MUMMY!!!!!!!! #monsterdon

okay what other, higher budget movie is this from?

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

Ask an academic "ok where does the map say the treasure is" and get an hourlong lecture on comparative etymology #monsterdon

The Mummy has been here the WHOLE TIME! rips off skin to reveal MUMMY beneath

#monsterdon

@amyfou

Wait, you guys were following the plot?

#monsterdon

Bad guy mastermind sounds a lot like The Sphinx from Mystery Man....

#Monsterdon

love that nobody has noticed the camera in the study

#monsterdon

Two thirds of the way through the Wrestlers vs Aztec mummies movie and still no Aztec mummies.

#Monsterdon

That surveillance camera is positioned very well

#monsterdon

"...it says ..... drink more Ovaltine"

#Monsterdon #TheWrestlingWomenVsTheAztecMummy

@Taweret reading the codex probably

#monsterdon

I bet the mummy is somewhere doing something really cool rn

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon the fuck is my mummy? Even the characters in this movie are bored!

We'll make you a movie
That's long and immense
Way hey
Slow the plot down

Just give us a script
That makes no friggin' sense
We'll try so hard
To slow the plot down #monsterdon

People led boring lives before you could stare at phones all day, empty boring lives....

#monsterdon

@yatsu Yeah I'm not sure they know what a codex is.

#monsterdon

Oh thank god the movie's giving us some down time after that pulse-pounding wrestling spectacle >_> #Monsterdon

Come on, dude! We want a mummy! Read the codex!

#Monsterdon

When the Aztec mummy does show up I feel it cannot help but be a disappointment after all this pent-up tension waiting #monsterdon

If you thought wrestling was boring, just wait for 20 minutes of chess!
#monsterdon

Aahhh... back in the good old days when a police whistle meant something.

#Monsterdon

This evil guy is pretty borderline evil

#monsterdon

The wrestling has gone on so long that people watching with commercials and people watching without are viewing the same match.

#monsterdon
#WrestlingWomenVsAztecMummy

I feel like the story of this wrestling match isn't easy to follow. It's more just random moves without the story told through fists that really good wrestling matches have.
#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomen #AztecMummy

#Monsterdon see in manga the martial arts scenes get broken up by stuff like superpowers or water-temperature-induced gender transitions

His sisters just do EVERYTHING for him, geez

#Monsterdon

“These ladies won fair and square. Let us all be nice and civil, now. Here is the codex. We’re all good, right?”

#Monsterdon

So the wrestling girls are supposed to be Japanese. But their brother who's in charge of the Black Dragons has big Chinese caricature vibes...
#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomen #AztecMummy

Oh - a scene in a non-descript room. Who'd have thunk it?

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon These fights feel like we could get some good meme formats out of them.

Mummy will make a late entrance....

"Sorry, I got wrapped up in something"

#Monsterdon

@sealawyer I forgot there was actually going to be a mummy.

#Monsterdon

@gnomon They did get top billing 😄#Monsterdon

Some classic wrestling and wrestling kayfabe techniques in this bout #monsterdon

the cop is not a man of honour

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

This movie is amazing!

#monsterdon

Will the mummy appear on the ring? I sure hope it does!
#monsterdon

I have forgotten why they were wrestling now

#monsterdon

"so you didn't think our pair would win, eh?"
no, i just doubted whether we'd ever get to the end of the match. #monsterdon

This wrestling match should have been an email #monsterdon

esos leotardos de la überchola y la gringa son sus super poderes.

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

I would like to see the mummy.

#monsterdon

Climb the turn buckle high
Take two falls out of three
Black out for Aztec Mummy :rightpos: #monsterdon

(It is entertaining when the Ref gets punched though, I know it's planned but it still feels satisfying to see Authority get slapped)

#monsterdon

Is this funny? Am I just broken?

#monsterdon

This fight would crash Netflix.

#Monsterdon #TheWrestlingWomenVsTheAztecMummy

I get knocked down, but I get up again, ain't nobody gonna keep me down...

#Monsterdon

LMAO las hermanas son las cholobbits de la primera lucha pero en uniformes de yudo.

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

Didn't the ref already declare the Judo girls the winner? And they get another round? What is this, 2 out of 3?

#monsterdon

"The Japanese girls." Yeah, I'm head-canoning that that the guy running the gang just has a weird sense of aesthetics

#monsterdon

i haven't seen a single folding chair

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

when will someone break a chair in another?
#monsterdon

#Monsterdon these wrestling moves are honestly pretty cool tho ngl, the way they're picking up these girls is really impressive

#Monsterdon 🤼‍♀️ 🪶 🐲 🤕 😱

Did anyone hear how these guys are planning to split the house? There's a lot of $$$ at this match it looks like

#monsterdon "oriental juddo chap" but the villain is a manchurian stereotype. the racism is as usual confusing.

Mixed arts wrestling matches like in Rocky III is older than I thought
#monsterdon

the immediate instinct to go after the ref when they are trying to call a KO is how you can tell its real #Monsterdon

@raindrops_and_roses I don't think I could even tell you if I tried

#Monsterdon

10 Hours Wrestling ASMR #monsterdon

@Lazarou
...and dignity

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon juddo vs arena wrestling. sound contest.

YEAH! FUCK THE REF!

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy