la Chela no era luchadora porque se dejó llevar tan fácilmente

y cómico que todos los miembros del Dragón Negro se ven más primos de Cantinflas que de Luis Miguel.

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

The Black Dragon pumping Charlotte's weak mind full of memes

#monsterdon

Haha so they DID find an Asian actor!
Just the wrong role ...

#monsterdon

oh no! an envelope!

#monsterdon

I don't like how much this feels like a plot for an adventure story from circa 1870-1930

#monsterdon

launching my #monsterdon thread for #TheWrestlingWomenVersusTheAztecMummies, a title that is hard to put into a hash tag. I am starting a few minutes late, but hoping this movie has lots of Aztecs, Mummies and Luchadoras.

That was a looooong wrestling scene.

#Monsterdon

Never underestimate Short Women

#monsterdon

las cholitas peleando en esta escena son como de ni un metro. a penas se les ve el tope de la cabeza por encima de la cuerdas, LMAO

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!¡YA!

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

... and I'm gonna take a break from what is now a remakeidea thread before everyone unfollows me out of irritation

But thanks to @Taweret@octodon.social for hosting another monsterdon!

#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomenVsAztecMummies

@ottaross lol well while I understand your feeling, this was kind of a great movie-watching experience, and that's what I'm here for - I mean, I'm definitely not doing #Monsterdon for the great movies

@ottaross I regret it but I apologize for nothing.

#Monsterdon

Good things about the movie:

mummy costume

the hat

the bat (so bad it rolled over the register and ended up 2,147,483,647 good)

Bad things:

#monsterdon

"Look! Hes afraid of fire!" she says, and they never use fire again.
#monsterdon

The moral of the story is that if you're entombed for eternity waiting for something to happen, it can't hurt to improve yourself by learning some practical shapeshifting. It'll help you pass the time, and might impress your adversaries someday #monsterdon

I'm going to go find some women wrestlers and an Aztec mummy and make them fight for my satisfaction this was so disappointing. #monsterdon

@Crazypedia "The danger is unleashed only if you substantially disturb this place physically. This place is best shunned and left uninhabited."

#monsterdon

@brooke bit of a let down on that front #monsterdon

I wonder what that aztec flashback footage was from tho

#monsterdon

@georgieboy 'peril' #monsterdon

¿esos son Toyotas? los Toyotas estaban por doquier en Puerto Rico durante la misma época

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

#monsterdon okay I need a database to find out if spiders get hurt in movies

Well, they didn't wrestle the mummy vampire. I kept wondering how this movie got snubbed from all the "greatest film" list and now we know.

#monsterdon

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

llegaron al templo de Xochtl

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

THE END 🤣 that was SO dumb I am crying #Monsterdon

THEY DIDN'T WRESTLE THE MUMMY

I AM *ENRAGED* #Monsterdon

Okay, so we sent the smallest guy and the brainwashed girl to take back the breastplate, but then we lost the brainwashed girl and the small guy got scared so he left in a panic, and now everyone has to go to the pyramid to try to rescue the brainwashed girl before the mummy wakes up and I guess eats her?

#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomenVsAztecMummies

Pyramid collapse... load-bearing boss?

#monsterdon

WHAT :grr:

anyway, ty for joining, everyone!

#monsterdon

Another #Monsterdon is in the can!

Thanks to @Taweret for hosting!

Tonight's feature, #TheWrestlingWomenVsTheAztecMummy was from 1962, and was the first sports based feature this year! Aside from some slam, bam, thank you ma'am, we had:

The plan is just leave the mummy in there and hope he calms down?

#Monsterdon

I'm having trouble featuring what Charlotte brought to the crew tbh

#monsterdon

"Look Loretta he's a Vampire now"
"He's a mummy again."

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon 🎵 I made this half-mummy half soup chef monster to please you

"he's a mummy again!" i am fucking crying i can't breathe #monsterdon

If they also say he's a vampire, who am I to argue?

#monsterdon

Wrestle the bat.

#monsterdon

look he's a vampire now?

#monsterdon

This AirBnB at least offers to clear the previous corpses off the bed.

#Monsterdon

Poor Xochitl's bones, being shoved aside to make way for a younger woman

#Monsterdon

If the hot women do not wrestle this mummy I will burn this place to the ground.

#monsterdon

@diazona @raindrops_and_roses it's supposed to be the treasure map somehow, according the codex #monsterdon

The mummy brought soup! How nice. #Monsterdon

So Charlotte's just The One Everything Happens To in this movie huh

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon I NEED SOMEONE TO TRY MY NEW SOUP RECIPE STOP SCREAMING

Excellent scream, even by our high #monsterdon standards.

Can't believe Tommy just abandoned Charlotte to the Mummy in the Pyramid, he's such a scuzzy man

#monsterdon

I feel like they could be parking a lot closer to the pyramid access door.

#Monsterdon

Where is the mummy?!
#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomen #AztecMummy

fair play to the makeup on the mummy though, does the job

#monsterdon

We get to see a lot of that car on the way to the pyramid. So suspenseful!

#Monsterdon

if that mummy doesn’t end up in a wrestling ring it will be the greatest missed opportunity in cinematic history #Monsterdon

@yatsu With the necklace that you could sell for millions.

#Monsterdon

The *ladies* are gonna get a chance to wrestle the vampire mummy real soon right?

Right??

#Monsterdon

No one's blaming the little weaselly guy for just leaving Charlotte in the pyramid with the mummy and driving home??

#Monsterdon

Rubber bat alert! #Monsterdon

These guys need to cut their losses. Ring up the British Museum, let them know you've got an ancient artifact priced for quick sale. Let the Brits deal with it.

#monsterdon

@gnomon If only they didn't take so long to find the mummy so they could get smacked around, this would have been so much more satisfying

#Monsterdon

So all this is happening because the archaeologist had a bad feeling, and knew they shouldn't take the breastplate, and then a mummy came after them, but they still took the breastplate anyway? Sometimes you have to confront your self-sabotage

#Monsterdon

Wait, so if you just return the breastplate, you'll end the mummy's rampage? After all he did was kill that evil gang?

#monsterdon

"Who knows what he has underneath his clothes"

always thinking about dick

#monsterdon

The foley nephew also has a pew pew noise maker!

#monsterdon

"Honey, I'm home!"
#monsterdon

MUMMIES ALSO DO NOT FEAR THE SUN

FUCK THIS MOVIE #Monsterdon

Really, this is what you feared?
#monsterdon

They want the mummy to be dangerous, but he's not got many moves in the fight scenes. A few low-energy karate chops.

#Monsterdon

so he's a vampire mummy???

#monsterdon

i know a lot of people are watching the dub so fyi i cannot stress enough how much the bad guys say "vamos" #Monsterdon

#monsterdon OH MY GOD THAT BAT

ALL IS FORGIVEN, THIS IS SPECTACULAR

Well, at least they're all sleeping together

#monsterdon

@diazona @lysdexic it is funny how even back then they all understood as soon as they turned their back someone would try to steal their stuff
#monsterdon

"Houston - we have mummy!"

#Monsterdon

Legit enjoying the Aztec flashback with the cool costumes and shenanigans.

#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomenVsAztecMummies

fucking dragur

#monsterdon #WrestlingWomanVsAztecMummy

MUMMY!!!!!!!!
#monsterdon

"Looks dead to me, professor."
"Don't be stupid!"

#monsterdon

THIS SCENE IS NEITHER WRESTLING WOMEN NOR AZTEC MUMMY >:( #Monsterdon

@Taweret@octodon.social 80s Synth Band video

#monsterdon

How did they find that *one* stone?

#Monsterdon

@cheribaker That would improve this movie tremendously

#Monsterdon

if they don't wrestle this damn mummy I swear to god

#monsterdon

esta partes es bien Cleopatra, pero házlo Xotchil

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

This dialogue sounds like a Scooby Doo episode

#monsterdon

Film minutes: 62, named characters? Probably 10-20. Aztec Mummies? zero.
#monsterdon

Oh shit! This movie has the budget for extras and costumes!?
Wait... what movie did they steal these scenes from?
#Monsterdon #WrestlingWomen #AztecMummy

If these mofos aren't careful they'll summon Mothra. #Monsterdon

Lemme see if I get this right: she can either NOT have sex and ALSO DIE, or she could have sex and not be sacrificed? I think I know what I would choose. #monsterdon

los colonialistas listos a desacralizar los ancestros en nombre de la patria.

güevones.

#Monsterdon #LuchadorasVMomiaAzteca

Men will literally disrupt a sacred blood sacrifice ritual instead of going to therapy #monsterdon

unexpectedly large Aztec Society scene, impressive

#monsterdon

Oh hell yeah, miniature step pyramids now we're cooking

#Monsterdon

Saucers... so we're getting aliens?

#Monsterdon

This should have been in minute 10 not 57
#monsterdon

Love that no one has noticed the giant lens
#monsterdon

"Patience is the greatest virtue"

So he watched the fight too.

#monsterdon

@CactuarJoe well it can't possibly reanimate this movie, so at least WE'RE safe. #monsterdon

Who plays chess by looking at the SIDE of the board??

#monsterdon

Why is each codex a handful of sheets of paper that fit in a large envelope? And what's written on them?

#monsterdon

so this... codex. it's like three sheets of paper with crayon scribbles on it? #monsterdon