I think I need a glass of whiskey too. #Monsterdon

A secret passage!
. . . ignored? You are a horrible cop.
#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Some knock-off, dollar-store stonehenge, I see. #monsterdon #wickerman73

are they trying to pinch his cod-piece? #monsterdon

Those are not the catgirls the internet promised me! #monsterdon

an entire town united to troll the shit out of a cop, it's a wonderful thing
#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan1973

wicked door knocker #monsterdon

dang even some good old time heathenism can't make british religious celebrations anything less than a dirge

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon

Montage of this cop getting pranked by the whole town. Classic May Day shennanigans

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon
(Searching a house)
"Hmm. Creepy secret basement. That's probably fine. No reason to look there."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eq0ENLs0f1w

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan1973

#monsterdon This is a strange ritual.

On this watch, I'm noticing something. The way some of the women are nearly throwing themselves at King Cop here isn't just mere horniness or release from the sexual restraints of Christendom.

Knowing how this film ends, and what's really happening, what you find out is that the islanders are *giving him an out*.

If he's no longer a virgin, he's no longer a worthy sacrifice. Yet, he resists at each turn, as one would expect.

#monsterdon

This is clearly not a modern Pagan festival. Not a cape in sight. We do love a good cape.

#monsterdon

"Cut some capers, man! "

#Monsterdon

Not sure the blazers work with the kilts. #Monsterdon

Is he sleeping in a coffin? Wait, not yet #Monsterdon

Aw yeah boys rub those swords together
#monsterdon

Lee's Cher impersonation needs work. #monsterdon #TheWickerMan

I only know what a Hand of Glory is from reading Charles Stross's Laundry Files novels. The UK occult secret service uses ones made from pigeons as a regular tool of their arsenal. #Monsterdon

If they only had Liam Lesson to cast as a cop at the time, this whole village would be fried!
#monsterdon

Christopher Lee is working this chartreuse and purple number! Werk

#Monsterdon

@HotTubMemeMachine you are welcome to post your guesses here! #Monsterdon

@HotTubMemeMachine I dunno, watching the film's pretty fun too #monsterdon

@apLundell oooh yes good idea

#Monsterdon

Incense for sleep? Who knew?
#Monsterdon

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon Were those the landlord's breakdancing pants?

@Lazarou These people are clearly pagans but not heathens, which is a Norse form of tribal focused religion. #monsterdon

You've got to hand it to her. That's a handy candle. #monsterdon #TheWickerMan

@ramsey That's just normal architecture over there. #monsterdon

This film would make a good point-and-click adventure game.

#Monsterdon

The Salmon of Knowledge
#Monsterdon

A pantomime Loch Ness monster stalks these streets.
This bit feels like it should be from the silliest Sherlock Holmes tale.
#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

There’s all those apples he couldn’t get for dessert #Monsterdon

“I guess I’ll just have to <do my actual job> myself!” #monsterdon

earliest recorded appearance of the yellow Wiggle
#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan1973

#Monsterdon Willow's Song is hauntingly beautiful. #TheWickerMan

So, he finds a secret, hidden passage in a home, and just ignores it?

#Monsterdon

i like the old library lady judging the cop with her side eye

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

#Monsterdon thats how you can tell this is from the 20th century, imagine a cop going to the library to read when he doesn't understand a culture 😜

Ladies, gentlemen and gentlepeople, he resisted #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon John Barleycorn, because the Celts wanted to make ABSOLUTELY CLEAR what they wanted from their gods in exchange for the sacrifice.

"Heathens, bloody heathens"

Hate crime dude, that's what that is....

#monsterdon

@himbovoorhees That is actually awesome

#Monsterdon

Be sure to stir the pitch, wouldn't want it to burn!

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

#monsterdon I feel I'm watching some director's cut. There is a crazy woman dancing around here

Missing hand! Missing hand! #monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Oh, I had somehow completely forgotten the terrifying animal masks. #monsterdon

Animal masks are totally part of pagan practice today. They are of course common in shamanic practice where people impersonate a god to go on a spiritual journey.

#monsterdon

OH I figured it out: the cop sounds like Ewan McGregor. It's been bugging me all movie long

#Monsterdon

The Salmon of Knowledge! And the Tilapia of Wry Wit #Monsterdon

Now, *I* wouldn't be lured into a dark alley by a man wearing a circus tent riding a wooden horse but then I'm just not into that. Now, this cop...#monsterdon

and that's as close as christopher lee had to get to fans for this film

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon From creepy folk songs to creepy nursery rhymes, they’ve got it all!

D’awww, cross-eyed owl. #Monsterdon

I want to move to this ACAB island #monsterdon

Where can I find that mustard-colored turtleneck?! I’ve just found my new wardrobe!

#Monsterdon

Ah, here come the locals in their animal masks, as one does in these parts.

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

That girl in the wardrobe was some A+++ fucking with a cop, well done. #monsterdon

Honestly, I'm just grateful the older dudes in animals masks aren't cocks out, way this has been going. #Monsterdon

@Zerofactorial He's engaged and says no sex before marriage, so....

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon

#monsterdon we carry death out of the city!

arggfffghh what metal album opens with that???

See also https://youtube.com/watch?v=xFWGrNR_mog

#TheWickerMan #monsterdon

There are some records of human sacrifice in the Celtic world. e.g. in the dindshenchas an Irish compilation from the 11th century mentions that first born of all kinds were offered in sacrifice. But no mention of wicker structures.
#monsterdon

@NovaCora
Sometimes lay people will read from the Bible during the service. #monsterdon

Cop gonna smash??? #monsterdon

I'm thinking the sergeant is himself a virgin, though not the most beloved... #monsterdon

the way he hit those dolls is basically how people react to my smut content :(

#monsterdon

I would have thought the whole "oh hey they make human sacrifices" thing would have been just the clue he needed to conclude that Rowan *is* dead and somebody hid her body

#Monsterdon

What if Rowen Morrison had been hiding behind that curtain the whole time?

#monsterdon

okay, the girl in the wardrobe is this movie's hero. #monsterdon

i like how this film plays up her dancing and rhythmic smacking but irl we would be like "SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M TRYING TO SLEEP"

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Oh my god, it's the infamous Britt Eklund Butt Double Sexy Dance #Monsterdon

Some of these folks were in The Shining, weren't they.

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Barging in and having a good rummage around, like a good cop 9_9 #Monsterdon

Ah, a nice big cauldron of steaming tar

#Monsterdon

The plane won’t start. What are the chances? #Monsterdon

jeez, dude, knock will ya! #monsterdon

mud-lerr

#monsterdon

He's been told, many times now, to go back to the main land. #monsterdon #TheWickerMan

My mom, after he knocks the fucking dolls off the bed "IT'S A FUCKING MADHOUSE" #monsterdon #wickerman73

Oh last year's harvest must have fail because... well I'm sure it's not something that the cop possesses. That would just be an unlikely coincidence. I'm sure.
#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Ah, culture clash :D #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon that little shit.
I want to adopt her.

1973 cat girls for harris

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon

"You could maybe get old sam to row you out"

Is a big "FUCK YOU" to the copper, love it!

#monsterdon

theses masks are sure scary!
#monsterdon

So I think I may have missed something, who reported Rowan as missing? #Monsterdon

Got to give em credit: looks like a fun party #monsterdon

#Monsterdon I’ve never been to a Scottish fair, so I can’t say if this is representative. It would look just fine at our local Renfest, though.

Scottish catgirls.

#monsterdon

May day! May day! #Monsterdon

kids carrying death out of the village is extremely wholesome. they're carrying it out not in whats the problem #monsterdon

she has a NICE butt

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

i don't have a chase scene or horses. i have ACAB Bob here reading about May Day at the library in a loooooooong internal monologue.

#Monsterdon #TheWickerMan

Those god names are totally made up.

#monsterdon

"Cake or death?"

#TheWickerMan #Monsterdon

for a policeman he is being very rude to read aloud.
#monsterdon

Don't eat the baby cake

#Monsterdon

And with a good harvest, maybe next year we can afford to give Nuada pupils. #Monsterdon