Miriam has THE STRENGTH OF A VAMPIRE which is very helpful for moving a near-corpse

#monsterdon

...So this species of vampire turns into a Return of the Living Dead-style vampire, immortal and unkillable but still decayed? #Monsterdon

"AMTA for ditching my boyfriend and him rapidly age before my eyes?"

#Monsterdon

surely he will get the squirty bottle for doing that?
BAD john not in the house SQUIRT
#Monsterdon

Whoa, Bowie's getting older by the second…
Lots of Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes in a short time.

#monsterdon

Every time I go to bathroom to take off my shirt… there’s always a 125-year-old man watching me get undressed

#monsterdon

Dude's literally just lost in the hospital. #Monsterdon

"I went into your hospital a middle aged man, I came out an elderly pervert!"

#Monsterdon

You're drooling, Bowie. #Monsterdon

oh, also: coffee was ALMOST served

#Monsterdon

Neat! Claymation monkey zombie! #Monsterdon

#monsterdon If I saw a big glass ash tray right on the arm of the couch, I'd assume smoking was permitted.

"Oh don't worry about him, he's British...."

#Monsterdon

["top men" inflection] I'm a young man

#Monsterdon

Oh, this is a Whitley Strieber joint. I should've known. #Monsterdon

vampire hungry

but for what?

perhaps....quaaludes???

#Monsterdon

Quaaludes, yeah, this is the 1980s all right #Monsterdon

They're not going to appear in any of the polaroids, right? #Monsterdon

The vibes of this movie feel like a place I want to visit but definitely not live in. Not at my age anyway. maybe decades ago.
#Monsterdon #TheHunger

OK, this is way more than normal 80s-tiddies. So far I'm not sure if there's a plot though.

#monsterdon

@trixter @strangefour Bauhaus are from my home town #Monsterdon

So far, this movie has the feel of a perfume commercial.

#monsterdon

Well, that intro was a bit of an editing mess.
#monsterdon

Looks like Tina still rules Bartertown. #Monsterdon

the instability of the tempo of these drums is very unsettling

#Monsterdon

Morpheus, stop taunting the zoo animals. #Monsterdon

He looks like me during high school gym class

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

@diazona #monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

dunno, I don't think those vamps are fast as lightning.

(though it is a little bit frightening...)

wait, why isn't this guy hopping?

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

looks like THIS vampire's dancing Thriller!

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

My incense is bigger than your incense.
#Monsterdon

wat does Miss Ting-Ting do for a living again?

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

@paco @TerryHancock Hey vampires gotta survive capitalism somehow

#Monsterdon

... Well, I've at least got to watch Liza Minelli's core workout

#Monsterdon

A lot of people are surprised when they find out whitley strieber wrote horror novels before he became a ufologist

And a lot of people aren’t surprised

#monsterdon

they were only kept at bay by their tuition bills taped to their foreheads.

#monsterdon #mrVampire #wrongHunger

wow, grad school is TOUGH in ancient China

#monsterdon #wrongHunger

@skatem Yes it was.
#monsterdon

at least the beginning of the movie was horny, though

well, I would certainly have turned that off if I'd watched it alone, so I'm glad to have gone through it with everybody

#Monsterdon

@hollie she won't be the first, nor will she be the last #Monsterdon

YAYY BARBICAN!
My favourite building in the London, she's living the life!

#Monsterdon

So, vampires can't die, except from things that kill ordinary humans? Stab in the throat, fall from a height, presumably a runaway Chevy Nova

#Monsterdon

aw, whoops, can't fly after all. what happened to the whole bat thing, Miriam?

#monsterdon

@hollie @SRLevine omg yes please

#Monsterdon

maybe Doctor Sarandon can figure out why it only lasts about 100 years though. i think there's still hope for her.

#monsterdon

OH AND SHE TURNS THE TABLES OH THERE'S A SUDDEN FLURRY IN THE CORNER SHE CAN'T GET AWAY #Monsterdon

"Yeah baby you're all right, here, let me hold you RIGHT up close to my aorta aaaaaaaand... die." #Monsterdon

"Met a lesbian, got on the H....how are you?"

#Monsterdon

The trailer really oversold this film.

#Monsterdon

Help yourself to a drink, get lost in this maze of a house…

#monsterdon

Downside of being a vampire: you can no longer hail cabs.

#monsterdon

@JoeWynne @jonny or undead

#Monsterdon

Chekhov’s Hickey

#monsterdon

oh he's gonna think she's preggers, isn't he?

*with an alien

#Monsterdon

Smoking next to optical equipment >.<

#Monsterdon #TheHunger1983

"the woman I met this afternoon gave me jewellery, but our relationship is fine..."

#Monsterdon

okay the fade to a steak being cut is worth some points

#Monsterdon

There was Blood, but now There’s Steak!

#monsterdon

THEM ART TITTIES

Sure.

#monsterdon

Vampires living in a time when anything can be faked and nobody believes them that it's actually them hanging out in Paris in the 1920s in those photos

#Monsterdon

"It's 2000 years old."

Yeah, but I can do better now. #Monsterdon

Hedaya was in Blood Simple right around this also. #monsterdon

#monsterdon This is slow. So slow. I have some staying awake issues but so far, it hasn't gotten in the way of watching the movie.

they shoulda played some AC/DC when the truck appeared.

#monsterdon #MaximumHungerDrive

@amyfou "Anything but deal with this shit..."

crawls into coffin
#Monsterdon

@hollie well also they are all still alive and just hanging out.

#Monsterdon

Ha! Miriam looking at her like, "yeah, you'll do." #Monsterdon

@JoeWynne Good. What a miscairage of justice. #monsterdon

oh wow. that makeup.

#monsterdon

I guess the student snack didn’t help.

#monsterdon

@klu9 that's what I was thinking off! Lords of COBOL! #Monsterdon

OLD BOWIE TAKE A LOOK AT MY LIFE

#monsterdon

I like that the aging process somehow included rotting

#monsterdon

oh okay so if you don't sleep the bacteria that rot your corpse also experience time faster

or something

we're about half an hour in and I guess the whole movie is just like this huh

#Monsterdon

WATCH BOWIE AGE RIGHT BEFORE YOUR EYES

#monsterdon

"He's aging at a rate of five years per minute."

He's breaking the speed limit all right. #Monsterdon

Given all the premature aging, Bowie's going to have a problem finding any young American's, young Americans. There are no young Americans.
Alright.
There are no young Americans.

#monsterdon

Perhaps, if we lived for centuries we'd stop making the same mistake every 70 years.....just putting that out there....

#Monsterdon

@Axiom there's always the #Monsterdon Replay as well, if you're into that!

https://monsterdon-replay.gerlach.dev/

But there will be other Sundays 😸

Urge to buy a JVC VCR rising.
#Monsterdon #TheHunger

More Hunky less Dory please

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon This has hoity-toyty cinematography written in lipstick, all over it.

Do Vampires fart in bed?

Truly a test of humanity

#Monsterdon

What is it with '80s vampires and billowy lace curtains?

#monsterdon

So far the movie has the gravitas of a laundry-detergent commercial.

#monsterdon

i think this might actually be a NIN music video
#Monsterdon

Yeah, tempera paint can be a bugger to clean up. #Monsterdon

I think the first few minutes of this movie are funded by Phillip Morris.

#monsterdon

Please tell me you disinfect the counter beforehand >_> #Monsterdon

I keep explaining to my wife we should take up the Vampire Lifestyle like this....

#Monsterdon

Tonight's #Monsterdon is The Hunger was required viewing for all the goth kids.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hunger_(1983_film)

"be-la lugosi's dead"

taps foot

#Monsterdon

Oh, Make Up Illusions, huh? Oh we're in for a time. #Monsterdon

this is so beautifully goth though....

#Monsterdon

Club scene! Oh we're starting strong here. #Monsterdon

The only thing that could make this movie better is if David Bowie was in it, and Bauhaus played the opening song.

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

In the category of Perky Nipples get a Starring Role, I give The Hunger 6/10. In 90 Minute Moody Music Video, 10/10. In the category of Watch Me Closely Or You Won't Have A Clue What's Going On and No I Won't Tell You If it's Worth it, I give 11/10.

The movie spends the longest hour ever slowly aging David Bowie in a waiting room like the anteroom to Limbo to show us what a raw deal this young vampire gets when eternal life turns out to not include eternal youth. This may or may not have something to do with researchers studying monkeys with premature aging or maybe it's sleep or longevity or --- ahhh, who cares?

When we see Susan Sarandon falling into the same trap, the movie turns in a taut 30 of her realizing what's happening, seeming to accept it, only to reject this bargain she never asked for in a bloody climax. With the help of some pigeons, the vampire queen's 4000 year collection of wizened lovers take their revenge.

You know what? I think the payoff was worth that long, slow walk. The beautiful soundtrack of mostly classical music helped me with the wait. I hope there's a full list somewhere, didn't see one in the credits.

Thank you, #monsterdon for an arty vampire movie that I ended up liking.

he looks like he just watched the previous movie...

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

@diazona #monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger

at least he's not in a pigeon-infested attic in Brooklyn...

@klu9

Yeah, this MOVIE slaps. and apparently it has a good PLOT too!

#monsterdon #MrVampire #wrongHunger