Totally rad party dude! #monsterdon

80s fabric horror!

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon That dog is going to poop everywhere.

wow it's the 80s and we're partying!!

#monsterdon

Candles right by the chiffon lamp cover. Great.
#monsterdon #TheGate

@apLundell I think I saw that in a movie once

#Monsterdon

What if... the phone doesn't work??

#Monsterdon
#TheGate

The Retro Pizza contingent is just over here like this every time there's a Zoids or He-Man reference in the background

#monsterdon #TheGate

#Monsterdon 🧒 🧒 ⛏️ 💰 🌪️ 🔥 👿 😱

dog's name: Angus.

dog's type: late 80s family doggo sheepdogish style

Bye mom! Take a long last look at the house, it's gonna be a smoking crater next time you see it! #Monsterdon

Ope, her hair turned frizzy. Guess she called Mrs. Van de Graff anyway.

#monsterdon

Stephen Dorff is great in The Righteous Gemstones.
#Monsterdon

Terry is like, half the guys I hung out with in Virginia. #Monsterdon

4th-wall-breaking "bye Dad" wave

#Monsterdon

This kid is complicit in insecticide.

#Monsterdon #TheGate1987

I forget why the parents are away, are they Swinging?

#Monsterdon

@Canageek Ooh you could rewind 10 minutes and use the #Monsterdon posts to spoil the jump scares if you want 🧠

there's a Legend of Zelda joke in here somewhere...

#monsterdon

...Soundtrack straight out of Pod People. Trumpy!? #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Boomer parents, leaving their Children at home. I laugh in #GenX. They didn't give a flying crap about anyone but themselves. Kids were pets. LOL.

I’m already two squares away from bingo, three different ways… #Monsterdon

@starkraving666 My mom says I'm a catch. #monsterdon #TheGate

#Monsterdon 🧒 🧒 ⛏️ 💰 🌪️ 🔥 👿 😱

so far I'm appreciating this version of compassionate masculinity

#Monsterdon "I can take care of this house" yeah I bet not

Terry votes for awful people today, doesn't he?

#monsterdon #theGate1987

We're all little strange, not just Terry.

#Monsterdon #TheGate

He almost sounds more curious than irritated about being grounded

#Monsterdon

betcha Terry listens to Insane Clown Posse... #monsterdon

#Monsterdon this is the fakest looking kitchen set. Like a pee wee Herman level of fake

"Let me tell you something about Terry" He's a little creep. #Monsterdon #TheGate

@blogdiva Everybody's like "Back in the old days parents didn't obsess over their kids so much" like they have forgotten how broken limbs were considered totally normal kid stuff.

#monsterdon #TheGate

#monsterdon Kids going to the mall to shop. I'm sure owners of all the derelict malls in the US are feeling a headache set in.

Apparently those bugs can go quite a while without air… #Monsterdon

head like a hole #monsterdon

Me: Aw he looks and acts just like @plaidtron3000

Plaid's mom: no, plaid was way cuter #monsterdon #thegate

Pantry moths are the worst.

#Monsterdon #TheGate

Wait, rocket engines aren't supposed to leak black powder like that

#monsterdon

With a gate to extra dimensional space, who cares about grounding!

#Monsterdon

Dad over here trying to do his best Judge Reinhold.

#Monsterdon #TheGate

I refuse to accept that she means "take care of" in any way other than a euphamism for murder. #Monsterdon

Dammit, been told this is actually scary. I can't do horror, I just like making fun of bad movies. Sorry all! #monsterdon

Mom is a knockoff Pat Benatar

#Monsterdon

And after dinner, kid, I'm gonna make you smoke that hole. The entire thing.

#monsterdon

"Sure dad, I'll fill in the IMPOSSIBLE SINKHOLE, why not?"

#monsterdon #TheGate

Pot roast Friday!

#Monsterdon

"I can take care of this house!"

SMASH CUT TO: *explosions* #Monsterdon

"How long do you think they can live without air?" Gonna want to get that kid in therapy pronto. #monsterdon

"Al" seems like she used to be super into science stuff, and now, she's feeling the peer pressure of high school and wants to be seen as "cool."

#Monsterdon #TheGate1986

If the kids don't have to jump off a bridge to escape a monster, I will be disappointed

#Monsterdon

HP sauce on the table

#Monsterdon

"...while our parents are on
Fire Island"

#monsterdon #TheGate

I admire the kid's honesty on the bridge answer.

#Monsterdon

Yeah, the streaming is not working for us tonight :( #monsterdon

Mom and dad have the same haircut. #Monsterdon

Which one of them will start making geode shapes out of their mashed potatoes.

#Monsterdon #TheGate

I feel like that “responsibility” line must be on the bingo sheet.

#Monsterdon #TheGate1987

Is that strawberry milk?

#Monsterdon

"Can you be trusted" Fuck no! #Monsterdon #TheGate

he's even got a striped shirt #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon I'm calling it that's an egg not a rock

Moths! Will we meet the Lord of Moths, Beezelbub's fuzzier brother?

#Monsterdon #TheGate1986

I used to collect geodes. There were so many cool ones
#Monsterdon

Glen! This is your weirdly bitchy father figure, which all these movies seem to have! #Monsterdon

Well that isn't foreboding at all, kid putting bugs in a jar and seeing how long they take to die. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon crawl in head first that's a good plan

estes rocket ftw

#monsterdon

Is it too late to call Mrs. Van de Graaf?

Well, my hair is still not frizzy...

#monsterdon

Don't like this punk kid.
#Monsterdon

That's true, it's neat and not at all cruel.

#Monsterdon

A gate to Hell in the suburbs would explain so much. OH SHIT THAT'S BUFFY'S SCHTICK. Is this a prequel? #Monsterdon

@diazona If the ground smokes after your tree is uprooted, consult an arborist #monsterdon

thunder! Thunder! THUNDER-BOLTS!

#monsterdon #TheGate

Ooh, shuttle patches...
#monsterdon

I hope this isn't an actually scary movie, it seems like it might be.... #monsterdon

#Monsterdon beeeeees

yeah, he's got glasses, he can definitely supervise. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🧒 🧒 ⛏️ 💰 🌪️ 🔥 👿 😱

these kids both have pretty sweet jackets tbh

The Thunderbolt*

#monsterdon
#TheGate

Check out Glasses Kid's Masters of the Universe tee. :D

#monsterdon #TheGate

See, this is how it's done. Don't waste any time getting to the monsters! #monsterdon

Forget about the Thunderbolt, we have USB-C #monsterdon

Call before you dig, kids.

#Monsterdon

In the 80s it was a rule:

Sam for Samantha
Alexandra for Al

#monsterdon

How much are those 80s toys worth now?

#Monsterdon #TheGate1987

Later they'd bulldoze the houses and build Buffy's High School there. #Monsterdon #TheGate

Did we just break into a crypt?

#Monsterdon #TheGate1986

Moral of this film so far is that gardening is bad and you shouldn't do it #monsterdon

What happened to the parents? #monsterdon

Unironic "wicked!"

#monsterdon

Wow, Hell is *right there*. Easy access, that's gonna put your property taxes up some. #Monsterdon

It's not nothing you will definitely get tetanus, listen to your mom.

#Monsterdon

that's the creation rock from The Island. you kids don't know what you've got there

#monsterdon #TheGate

"We're rich! And you have tetanus"

#Monsterdon

Very Stanger Things. Except it’s the actual 80’s. #Monsterdon

What's the blue stake color for hellmouth?

#Monsterdon
#TheGate

That's not nothing
#Monsterdon

@wohali There's going to be a first half to this film that we missed, if past movies are any indication

#Monsterdon

Young Arthur Dent
sortof
#monsterdon

it starts with them finding a geode? is it going to end up as decor in their "witchy" cafe and the real monster is gentrification?

#monsterdon

[Spike's head pops out] "Too early, kid."

#monsterdon #TheGate