Ha! The classic face peel-off. Love it.

#monsterdon

I DO want watermelons the size of weather balloons.

#Monsterdon

These people are too dry. #Monsterdon

"To powerful to be destroyed, to smart to be captured" Putting that in my resume. #Monsterdon #SwampThing

I think if you have to thank the red cross something has gone really wrong on your movie set.

#Monsterdon

Yikes, it’s late. Can I call in #Monsterdon to work tomorrow?

"scientists researching the swamp essence to make plants more resilient to climate created a dynamite swamp juice that amplifies everyone's inner characteristics and so now a paper mache pigdog is chasing the buff and cool swamp thing with a sword through the swamp portal"
is that right? is that where we are?
#monsterdon

Ok, NOW we're in Dagobah.

#monsterdon

This movie's pacing took a surprisingly ponderous turn for the finale.

But the big-bad getting his own transformation is perhaps a sign that things are about to pick up again

#Monsterdon

He’s photosynthesizing! #Monsterdon

It simply makes you more of what you already are

Better not give Richard Simmons any

#monsterdon

#monsterdon So, the best case scenario for this experiment is that this man, who you just completely betrayed, will also turn into a Swamp Thing? In the middle of your dinner party?

Supposedly the wipes were all done to mimic the comic books, but LOL they are entertaining in all the weirdest ways

#monsterdon

what are we doing here with 30 minutes to go and the militia dead, why is swamp thing just a regular guy now #monsterdon

Oh I didn't realize it was Titties O'Clock

#monsterdon #SwampThing

swamp thing shoudl NOT be able to talk that RUINS swamp thing #monsterdon

Ladies don't actually like flowers, they're just being polite out of fear

#Monsterdon

Why does that boat have a candelabra?

#Monsterdon #SwampThing1982

Finally the discount Rambo gets his just desserts

#monsterdon

Respect to whichever steadicam operator had to walk sideways through a swamp to keep Cable in focus while she was walking away from Jude like that. Impressive work.

#monsterdon

plant powers

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Bad guys have to take a class to practice the Wilhelm scream.

this science tantrum isn't because he got turned into the Swamp Thing. It just runs in the family.

#Monsterdon

he remembers the frustration of having a funding application rejected.

#monsterdon

@wohali According to IMDB, he was only in Swamp Thing, and this makes me sad.

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0061553/?ref_=tt_cst_t_11

#Monsterdon

Please tell me this kid went on to be in other movies.

#monsterdon

HAHA the roof-ripping effect was delightful, just straight up cable work

#Monsterdon

Maybe if you hadn't killed the scientist who made the magic potion you would be closer to immortality.

#Monsterdon

In the future, all scientific installations regularly conduct tests for French people pretending to be British by bringing up Dunkirk. #Monsterdon

🦖#MONSTERDON 🎞️

🥬🌿 SWAMP TRIVIA 🛶🌱 🥬 🌿

Listen for a Wilhelm Scream later in the feature.

#SwampThing

I appreciate how the evil guy wore a white hat when he impersonated the big hat guy most of the time, but a black hat when he was about to reveal how evil he was.

I think... maybe I got the colors wrong. #monsterdon

In the 80s all badasses were Rambo

#monsterdon

🚨 PENETRATION 🚨

#Monsterdon

Why . . . would a "plant with an animal's aggressive drive to survive" somehow translate to desert-capable tomatoes? Animals die while trying to survive all the damn time! #Monsterdon

Exploding plant growth formula that also makes you horny what else does this stuff do

#monsterdon

Dude, the quantity of food we *can* produce has never been the problem in modern times, it's who *we won't let have it*

#monsterdon

[stealthily] hut hut hut hut hut hut

#Monsterdon

@guyjantic Something else: community

#Monsterdon

@strangefour

#monsterdon #SwampThing

@jonny you should write a book on the philosophy of fucking off into things

#Monsterdon

thanks to Radio Shack, for providing computers and equipment

yeah, we noticed (and appreciated, this is the Fediverse, after all).

#monsterdon

Wow! Action, excitement, and swamp nips! This movie had it all. Now I know what the British mean when they say "bog standard".

Thanks @Taweret and #Monsterdon for another delightful evening! Go, and tell our story.

#monsterdon It's a shame, turning people into half-human half-plant could have been the secret to immortality.

Because, as we all know, all plants live forever.

"the players" ??? i'm not sure this movie was good enough for "the players"

#monsterdon

That's a rack… err, a wrap!

I can't say I recognize any of Wes Craven's style in this, but the movie moved along reasonably well and was a bit of silly fun. What more can we ask for, really?

#Monsterdon

yaaaaaaay MVP Jude

#monsterdon

"Hey can you try to hold this prop sword to maximally show off how cheap it is while we're getting a close-up?"

#Monsterdon

Jesse Verdantura out here improvising weapons like a good wrestler #Monsterdon

Did I just hear a fucking Superman sting when his arm came back?

#Monsterdon

the rich guy's inner essence is a pigdog wrapped in paper mache, that follows #monsterdon

Monster cocoon, neat!

#Monsterdon

He drank the forbidden Hi-C sip by sip, exactly what you'd expect from him.

#Monsterdon

"Is that new growth, or are you just happy to see me?"

#Monsterdon

yoloing it all on what the swamp thinks of you moments after hearing the hypotheses of a swamp thing is a hell of a bet to take after the rich guy seemingly funded and surveilled the underlying research for years beforehand #monsterdon

@SnoopJ Boobs. Her essence is boobs.
#monsterdon

very hard to focus while being consumed by wondering what this movie's idea of Alice Cable's essence is and how the formula would amplify it

#Monsterdon

@GramrgednAngel #monsterdon

The nature of the clothes was to be small, too.

I don't think Arcane has really thought this through, as villains go his methods are......arcane?

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon so, why is this guy using a torch?

Did they run out of batteries?

Is the party over? just curious

Because these pastries here are just going to waste

#monsterdon

are we not Bruno? WE ARE DEVO

#monsterdon

bruno is going to escape into Time Bandits (1981)

#monsterdon

Because we ALWAYS try experimental formulas out on the useful people, right?

#monsterdon

✅ Tits #Monsterdon

Okay but actually swamp thing they have substantially reorganized the taxonomies now so you're probably just all wrong and will need to go back to swamp thing biology

#monsterdon

"Tell him I've captured his queen"

Sir, Adrienne Barbeau is a queen to us all.

#Monsterdon

Oh good, the Swamp Thing is performing a miracle on him

#Monsterdon

Wow, impressive fanboat crash stunt!

#Monsterdon

Swamp Thing probably shouldn't roar everytime he sneaks up and takes somebody out.

#monsterdon

oh noo o oo shit we've been launched 3-4 feet in the air #monsterdon

#monsterdon The scientific team really should have become suspicious when their "military" escorts showed up in this hunter camo with no insignia whatsoever.

"Are you sure we should be shooting the suit this closely in such brightly-lit conditions? I mean, it *is* very flexible."

"It's gonna look great on-screen"

#Monsterdon

many of us need to roar naked in the swamp, better than 'touching grass'

#Monsterdon

Did they say abdominal snowman? Rather than abominable?

#Monsterdon

So far, gas-station attendant kid is my favourite character.

#monsterdon

80's movie woman internal monologue: could i... fuck the swamp thing? #monsterdon

"Shoo!"

swamp guy sighs

"Wait, did you just make the yummy sound?"

#monsterdon

oh man that suit is so bad, haha

#monsterdon

@cargot_robbie #monsterdon

In the "Jude and Cable" sitcom, Swamp Thing is the weird neighbor who guest-stars every once in a while.

Jude is the best #monsterdon

No one can see the guy with a small bush in his hat. He's a camouflage genius!
#monsterdon

So the villains were trying to get the green goop, but the boy scientist escaped and slashed the goop on himself accidentally, making him explode and run into the swamp, perhaps to become some kind of swamp thing.

Meanwhile, agent big hair was hiding some of the secret science research notes from the rambos.

The rambos decide to blow up the secret lab, bury the bodies and destroy the evidence.

#monsterdon

1. take the flaming lab coat off
2. explode

#monsterdon

[pressing the "hostile work environment" button over and over again] #Monsterdon

The real plant for the 21st century is the brussel sprouts that taste better than previous types of brussel sprouts. follow me for more insightful insights. #monsterdon

THROW a bunsen burner? No wonder he died. Sheesh. #Monsterdon

I love me some doo-dads and gizmos. Turn some knobs! #Monsterdon

Ray Wise looks like a guy that was supposed to be handsome and then someone's finger slipped on a slider.

Fortunately he's still got that voice. #Monsterdon

Richard Bracken editing Swamp Thing, in what is possibly the dumbest example of nominative determinism I've seen put to film. #Monsterdon

@paco @rebeld just striding into 'Jays Meat Provision' with the confidence of Alexander the Great and saying "JAY, LET'S MAKE SOME SOUNDS TOGETHER?!"

#Monsterdon

@floatybirb it was a bit mid, not terrible, not great, competently put together so you can't mock that #Monsterdon

@Louisa #monsterdon

ikr he wouldn't even need PPE. In fact, he could do amazing on-site data collection.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. Like, it was a better movie than a lot, but comic book adaptations... (why would the scientist fuck off into the swamp and not try to get back to science? Also, this really is a case where better special effects would help)

#Monsterdon #SwampThing1982

I like there is a special shout out to the person who made Adrienne Barbeau's 'Hostage Gown'

#Monsterdon

And that's all.

Thanks @Taweret and everyone!

#monsterdon

@jmelesky #monsterdon

because it's what Nietsczhse would have done.

lol @ "Little Bruno"

#Monsterdon

Assistive devices exist, sir.

#Monsterdon #SwampThing1982

"Alec, let me go with you. We can live in the swamp, eat fungus and make swamp babies!"

#monsterdon

Money on "He fucks off into the Swamp" ending

#Monsterdon