So. Much. Unnecessary. Dialog.

#monsterdon

Well this movie just got twice as good. #Monsterdon

Not the police robot!

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

...or the fight choreography...

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

The Amazons are there to deliver what you ordered #monsterdon

Bechdell pass... I guess? But it kind of ... doesn't feel like it

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

GIRL FIGHT!

Look out - they have more curtain rods!

#monsterdon

"die, robot"? philosophically, is that even possible?

#monsterdon

Farewell, Darth Sextoy. You helmet was disturbing and suggestiv---- DAMMIT HE"S NOT DEAD.

#monsterdon #starcrash

They shot the robot!

Is there robot dead? I hope the robot is dead! #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon Costumes by the designer's barely disguised fetish.

I feel like we're getting into "barely disguised fetish" territory.

#Monsterdon

@Taweret well looks like you got your wish lmao

#monsterdon

That was a killer double-boot-kick tho. #monsterdon

My eyes feel such relief whenever they shoot in a natural setting.

#Monsterdon

Omgs some of the worst stage fighting!!!

#Monsterdon #StarCrash1979

Those poor horses got painted red for this scene.

#Monsterdon

Yes! HURT THE ROBOT!!!

#Monsterdon

"Amazons on horseback!"

Themiscyra fugitives to the haunted stars.

#Monsterdon

If she doesn’t drop down and yell “You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!” I’m going to be not surprised.

#Monsterdon

This fight scene needs more pillows

#Monsterdon

Well at least she's dressed for a day on the beach.

#Monsterdon

Looks more like an executive letter-opener than a laser spear #monsterdon

Dragon ponies??!!!! #monsterdon

idk who that lady is but i like her face. like i think she's evil but she's cute

#monsterdon

So are women just Amazons?
#monsterdon

I can't deal with Bubba the Robot

#Monsterdon

evil kate bush is here!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon I want a red sealand horse.

#Monsterdon

Wait, she's in a *different* learherkini...?

#monsterdon crocohorses?

Okay, the horses with masks were kind of cool, like sea horses; they should have given them more screen time. #Monsterdon #StarCrash

oh looks like it's time to do a racism? #monsterdon

Wow. That's some seriously good dialog.
Her: "Let's look around."
Him: "Ok"
Her: "What's that!?"
Him: "I don't know"
#monsterdon

Those poor spray painted horses. #Monsterdon #Starcrash

Christopher Plummer on doing Starcrash

"I'll do porno in Rome, as long as I can get to Rome. Getting to Rome was the greatest thing that happened in that for me."

From IMDB.

#Monsterdon

AMAZONS ok

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1979

Civilization, type? Fully independent.

#monsterdon

like 75% of the way through filming this movie they must have had the thought like "why is this guy even a robot, nothing about him is a robot" #monsterdon

taking suggestions from the audience to decide the c3po ripoff's accent and neuroses.... I heard "valley girl" and "butt-phobia"

#monsterdon

I love it when you've got the big important mission for the Emperor and he can't send along a squad of commandos or something.

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1978

Hyperspace looks like they flew through an old CRT at 640 x 480.

#Monsterdon

AMAZONS?

#Monsterdon #StarCrash1979

"we must be careful. we are in the eeevil count's domain."

"look! amazons on horseback!"

#monsterdon

They can't sue us for the idea of an anxious robot who can't unbend his arms.

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

"The nuclear exhaust ports have been gutted by fire"

You don't say, something exhausting nuclear something or another looks like it was on fire?

#Monsterdon

'They said this air would be breathable
Get in, get out quick, no-one gets hurt
Something is dragging me up the hill
I look down at my red shirt
I look down at my red shirt….'

#monsterdon

The commercials are refreshingly well done.

#monsterdon

The "Shuttle" has, uh, F-1 inspired engines?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

Gladiator bikini lady looks scary. #Monsterdon #StarCrash

And they've got to rescue Space Martin Septim!

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1978

#Monsterdon I think they spent more on her makeup artist than they did on the set.

She's free now. She could put some clothes on if she wanted to. Is the AC broken or something? Is she working on her tan? #Monsterdon

"Take it easy I'm coming" *cough* *phrasing* *cough* #Monsterdon #Starcrash

You know, I bet they used a forklift off camera to lower that shuttle down. Again, simple, but effective.

#monsterdon #starcrash

Someone was like, “We want a nervous robot like C-3PO.” So, the writers, thought, “we need him to constantly say what makes him nervous so the audience will know he’s nervous.”

#Monsterdon

That poor man has lissajou figures growing out of his hand. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lissajous_curve #monsterdon

i feel confused about how many robots there are and how many of them have bad accents

#monsterdon

they left the shuttle door open, though! crabs will get in!

#monsterdon

Who else keeps looking at her outfit and thinking it must be a rip-off of Leeloo from the Fifth Element, until you remember that that movie came out after this one...

#Monsterdon

I feel like a LOT of money was put into this movie just... not in the script. Or the miniatures. Or the costumes. Or...

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

@randy_s that was William Kitt. This is Bradley Cooper #Monsterdon

Man, that dude's accent is distracting #monsterdon

I usually like movie robots but this one needs to shut up

#Monsterdon

"Take care"? Really? #Monsterdon #starcrash1978

hey she's wearing a bikini because they're at the BEACH

#monsterdon

Actually, in 1978 I would have thought those graphics pretty cool.

#monsterdon

"It's almost buried!" is such a nice way to say "we barely buried these set pieces" #Monsterdon

At least she asks if there is air.

They are trying too hard to sound American.
#Monsterdon

This Hyperspace makes me nervous too

#monsterdon

I like the little carved out nooks in the chair for Ackton's perm. #Monsterdon #Starcrash

Wheeeeeeeee!

#Monsterdon #StarCrash

oh it's Worst Mini-Sub, okay

#monsterdon #starcrash

that's an adorable little shuttle egg

#monsterdon

Wait, Stella Star's skimpy prison uniform was more covering than her planetary exploration outfit? I'm crying

#Monsterdon #Starcrash1978

I rode on that minicar at disneyland

#monsterdon #starcrash

wait is she wearing even less clothes now? 🥴 🥴 🥴
#monsterdon

Soy-kets here is Marvin's the Paranoid Android's cousin. #Monsterdon

So hyperspace isn't normal mode of transport?

#Monsterdon #Starcrash

@steggy Not in the penal colony!
#monsterdon

this emperor guy seems to be the dictator of a government that uses robot police and metes out life sentences like candy but I'm sure his framing of the galactic conflict is completely truthful #monsterdon

Nervous Texan robot reporting for duty. #Monsterdon #StarCrash

That robot certainly is a fancy pants.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

Let's just do a little exposition for the audience now. Because apparently not everyone has heard of hyperspace?

Do these ships not stock clothes for women

#Monsterdon

@paco Maybe Christopher Plummer enjoyed the cosplay. #Monsterdon #StarCrash (and the filming in Italy)

"Every time we go into hyperspace I get nervous"

I do too, but only because all my life when I've felt anxious I've been told I look hyper.

#Monsterdon

you don't want to use the space shuttle, that thing's not safe, nasa retired for a reason

#monsterdon #starcrash

Why is there a big teakettle on their bridge?

#monsterdon #starcrash

The robot who said he has no emotion circuits just said he gets nervous.
#monsterdon

you never know when this film is going to smash cut to C64 sfx #monsterdon

Any reason for the green dude?
#monsterdon

Gotta go stand in front of the Orb of Teeth #Monsterdon

Good bye, Emperor von Trapp #monsterdon

Shall we begin our search for URANUS?

#Monsterdon

oooh this is the part that syncs up with dark side

#monsterdon

The guys who delivered those computer effects did NOT live up to contract. #Monsterdon #Starcrash

At least Plummer is putting in a full day's work.

#Monsterdon

Uranus?!?! #monsterdon