Dear movie,

Yikes

Love, Srol

#monsterdon

Dirk Gordon Laramie III, but you can call me Gherk for short.

#monsterdon

yiiiiiiiiikes

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Is it me, or is Holly’s mustache about to fall off?

#Monsterdon

@cherizilla No, but lots of aluminium foil.

#Monsterdon

This is where the shorter version skips the next 15 minutes.

#Monsterdon
#StarOdyssey1979

@cherizilla Someone attacked earth, I think. And everyone has mindpowers. And mustaches. #monsterdon

Hollywood if he could.
#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

"some guy named Norman", now the most important person in the movie

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

#monsterdon Jeeves and Bubo have remarkably similar gibberish sounds.

Good morning professor. I was already in the room, but I'm saying it now.

#Monsterdon

The professor is so bored in this film, he was playing solitaire. #Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

lol, Professor drinks again...

#Monsterdon

Turtlenecks and horrible flirting are apparently forever a part of the human race

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

#Monsterdon well that was horrifying

I arrived late. Has there been any plot yet? #Monsterdon

"You used to kiss a lot better. Why don't you wave your head back and forth like me when I kiss?" #Monsterdon

@cmdln
I suddenly realized this is newer than Star Wars, WTF
#monsterdon

@kamikat

They are trying to remove the unsightly things on everyone’s upper lip. #Monsterdon #StarOdessy1979

Please more of the Casio calculator soundtrack. #monsterdon

(The Sweet and Spicy snack cones are open, let's fucking gooooo!)

#Monsterdon

If the fight is in the dark we don't need a fight choreographer. Or stunt men. or actors. or a cameraman.
#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

#Monsterdon 🌌 🔫 🪐 👽️ 🌍️ 😱
#StarOddyssey1979

this is confusing

“Space hippies share Hookah with guy in orange jumpsuit, film at 11!” #Monsterdon

Bingo parlour fight. This film just goes from strength to strength.

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

OMG every fight should have this soundtrack 😂

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

I love how kissing in movies for a long time was either

a) just smash faces together as artlessly as possible

b) whoever removes a tonsil first, wins

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

Would you call this Nolanesque? #monsterdon

DId that women get tentacled up into the chandelier???

#monsterdon

Nerd brawl
#Monsterdon

Every person who beats me in cards is a notorious card cheat because those are the only people who'll play w/ me anymore. #Monsterdon

Is that Mad Magazine's Dick DeBartolo?

#monsterdon

That kissing was almost as convincing as the Sharpied-on mustache.

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

#Monsterdon "Assisting criminals to escape jail? An act such as that is strictly against the law! "

Did they steal this dialog from an 90s anime?

6 7

It is extra hard to screen cap a movie this blurry.
#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

What so everyone has telepathic/telekinetic powers? #monsterdon

"DIRK LARAMIE!?"

#Monsterdon

What an odd game #Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

This is why they have to scan your eyes at roulette wheels

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

Nothing says SPACE quite like a forehead star.

#Monsterdon

@cmdln It's science *fantasy*.

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

I think they’re in a casino, now. A space casino.

#Monsterdon

NUMERIC BINGO

#Monsterdon

Everyone is definitely going to a disco after this

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

Who’s playing bingo here? Or is it lottery?

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

He hypnotized him the way he did that medicine cabinet

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Yanti Somer’s English voice actress sounds a lot like Daria Nicolodi’s English voice actress in Deep Red (1975).

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

wtf is this low-rent jedi mind-trick #monsterdon

Professor Ecks

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

@klu9 s-tier

#monsterdon

Yeah I'm like 99% sure that mustache is a marker.

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Dirk and Norman too?

#Monsterdon

Capaldi-ass eyebrows

#monsterdon

So we need to get a couple of guys out of prison in order to maintain our racial superiority?

Are we the baddies?

#Monsterdon

Space prison break? LFG

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

So there is a spaceship make out of...cryptocurrency? #Monsterdon

it's made of ethereum? damn blockchain aliens

#monsterdon

There’s no way ANY of this dialog is even remotely related to the original Italian script.

#Monsterdon

Cantina? More like... Can't Tina

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Aziz! Light! #Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

In Italian, his a name a is
ar tooey dee tooey. He's a completely original technical robot.

#monsterdon

this is totally Italian spaghetti-sci-fi

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon That guy's name is "Hollywood"?!?

Commander Bar?

Is there a Lieutenant Foo?

#Monsterdon
#StarOdyssey1979

Superfluous robot

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

@ramsey story?

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon #starodyssey

R2's arms are ... wittle...

Great Value R2D2.
#monsterdon

That is some nerve tbh....

#Monsterdon

Implied positronic brain for the robot?

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

#Monsterdon 🌌 🔫 🪐 👽️ 🌍️ 😱
#StarOddyssey1979

temu r2d2

Does any of this have anything to do with the story?

#Monsterdon

Temu R2D2 #monsterdon

#Monsterdon r2d2 from wish

Wait, old wrinkly forehead guy and the woman he’s mansplaining to are humans?

The edit of the movie on the Miru stream is making very little plot sense

#Monsterdon

oh dear this is getting cringe #Monsterdon

Using telekinesis to open the liquor cabinet, classic graduate. #Monsterdon

This guy is one of us?

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon 🌌 🔫 🪐 👽️ 🌍️ 😱
#StarOddyssey1979

did other ppl's uncles constantly refer to them as 'my dear'?

This is the most casual apocalyptic film ever! #Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Yeah, Uncle Fester, you shouldn't be laughing at people!

#monsterdon

We have Charles Xavier at home

Charles Xavier at home:

#Monsterdon

"Why isn't he working with us?"

"He took 3 rounds of funding from Andreessen Horowitz and has become insufferable."

#Monsterdon

Ah so there's a Chosen One who's so Chosen that he needs a Chosen Other One just to contact him

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

This movie is the cinematic equivalent of Chef Boyardee #Monsterdon

I hate that I'm working on like ten things at once and can't catch this #Monsterdon . All of you have to suffer in my place.

I do want to say, those who can, stick around for the second movie on Miru's stream. I saw it a while back and I honestly think the Monsterdown crowd will enjoy it.

"It seems they want a show of stock footage. It would be rude of me not to oblige."

#monsterdon

The image quality reminds me of youtube in 2005.
#monsterdon

@ohiofi they are watching the movie with us so we feel less lonely.

#Monsterdon

How are the papers already talking about this when the aliens arrived 10 seconds ago?

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

Oh the baddie is a Colonizer who 'bought' Earth as a fixer upper world. #Monsterdon

Captions: spacecraft roaring
Spacecraft: makes tinkly noises #Monsterdon

What is this dude wearing?

#monsterdon

Fire all stock footage cannons!

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

*invading alien pushes the 'stock footage' button*

#monsterdon

This 8-bit synth intro theme really screams quality!

#Monsterdon #StarOdyssey

Is this movie gradually getting more out of focus? #monsterdon
#starodysessy

We're starting off strong for a potential "humanity was the real monster" theme

but also with a dub and something that's been chopped up as much as this, who the hell even knows what the plot will turn out to be?

#Monsterdon

The bridge bunnies are known as Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, Karen, and Sue.

#monsterdon #StarOdyssey1979

I loved the song Hyper Radar.

#Monsterdon