monsterdon replay · Best of Slugs

SnoopJ

SnoopJ@hachyderm.io

slug CHOMP is by far the best part of this movie so far, I wish we had more of that

Paco Hope

paco@infosec.exchange

@Andres4NY
#monsterdon

I feel validated in my habit of washing the "pre-washed" salad greens from the grocery store.

AmyFou 🕊️

amyfou@lingo.lol

#Monsterdon 🐌 🐌 🐌 💀 🩸 😱

You guys next up in my Tubi recs is something called 'TICKS' and it's about ticks and no no nope nope nopety nope

🦆🦆 J Riley 🪿

ohiofi

I keep wanting one of these #monsterdon films to be a rip-off of Hitchcock's "The Birds".

It seems like an easy format to rip off.

You start with some non-descript human drama. And then suddenly [animal] turns violent and everyone has to run for cover.

It's like a zombie film with less make-up. I'm surprised more hack directors don't watch 'The Birds' and think "I could do that!"

I like science guy. I'm rooting for science guy. He's a nerd in the traditional sense. Not one of those modern "hot nerds" only pretending to be nerdy.

Is that it? Are we rolling credits on a closeup of one slug moving at normal slug speed across an under-lit sewer grate??

OH GOSH WE ARE

And that's a wreck! The town has exploded! Slugs ate everything & everyone they felt like! No characters were pleasant or enjoyable, and with any luck they'll all be slugged in the post-credits stinger!

Thank you for hosting, @Taweret! Thank you for the bingo card, @Cherizilla! And thank you all for slogging through this one together.

combatwombat@hachyderm.io

bobert

The pitch meeting. #monsterdon #slugs1988

#monsterdon Why are they using exotic chemicals to kill the slugs when they haven't even tried salt yet?

They're a midwestern town, the road department should have literal tons of salt just laying around in a storage area.

[empty]

allanb

Another sadly-overlooked Academy Award winner, no thanks to the $15,000 this film grossed on release

Thanks @Taweret and the #Monsterdon emergency riffing team!

#monsterdon You can tell it's Halloween because in the entire town there's one jack-o-lantern.

Surely this will be relevant to the plot.

HOLD UP

SLUGS CAN'T DRAG A BODY AWAY

FOUL

Sam Elliott: “Sometimes you eat the slug, and sometimes, well, the slug eats you.”
#monsterdon

All you want to do is play mind games. Well, count me out.

Based on my food service experience, I'd say a bloody corpse exploding with worms would be enough to get the place shut down for a few days at least

#Monsterdon Slugs is brought to you by... Gushers!

#monsterdon These sure are high school students.

We laugh, but none of us are eating lettuce tomorrow now...

You know what wouldn't blow up the whole town? Salt.

#monsterdon So, they still haven't tried salting the slugs?

in the mammalian articulatory system, it was the development of costal breathing that allowed the laryngeal muscles to become free as an articulatory organ. this also coincided with rearranging the leverage and musculature in the jaw which allowed the repurposing of the bones in the jaw to form the bones of the middle ear. It is believed that these adaptations could have been subject to joint selection for hearing, chewing, and vocalization. So the slugs developing the ability to scream alongside the ability to eat meat tracks, at least loosely, the course of mammalian evolution for some related body systems #monsterdon

Imagine how difficult it was to train a stunt hamster.

This film never really finishes a scene, it just gets bored and starts a new one. #Monsterdon

I can tell I'm going to spend the entire movie going, "But why couldn't you just....

a) outrun the slug
b) outswim the slug
c) remove the slug from your body
d) get some salt

#Monsterdon do health inspectors dream of electric slugs

#monsterdon Monsters sure love punishing teen sex.

I wonder why all monsters find it so offensive.

EVERYONE IN THIS MOVIE NEEDS TO PUT THEIR SHIRTS ON #Monsterdon

It's funny how all the 70's movies are like "I hate my spouse, I can't wait to cheat with some hot babe over there," and all the 80's movies are like, "I can't wait to get home to my spouse, who is right now in a black negligee - or maybe chopping me a salad - waiting to make my dreams come true"

PLEASE YES please yes please yes please make the slugs have little faces and take bites of people please please please #monsterdon

#monsterdon I don't believe that this random suburban street has sewers so large you can walk around in them.

I mean, why?

[Dog, hysterical] I tried to warn him man! He wouldn't listen!

Well, that was highly entertaining! Great pick, everyone. Quality commentary.

Thanks for hosting us, @Taweret

The slugs are kind of cute, no?

it seems like all you need to be invulnerable to slugs is "wearing any clothes" and "not lying down in a pool of slugs and not trying to get up" #monsterdon

sir as a pair of football dads i don't trust your ability to estimate your sewer slug baiting time down to the second like that, i'm going to dump the stuff in in a few minutes or after i get tired of waiting for you guys #monsterdon

#monsterdon How come there are slugs coming through the pipes. Enough to fill up entire houses, but only about four people in the whole town have noticed?

Mother Bones

_L1vY_@mstdn.social

Well it's only an entire town's mutant slug population's worth of lithium arsenic, Michael.
How long can it take to synthesize single-handedly? Three hours?

#monsterdon If slugs are coming out of the tap-water, imagine what people's hot-water heaters must be like.

#monsterdon Look, I know my junior partner's head exploded, but that's no reason to delay our business meeting.

#monsterdon Yeah, sure. Sometimes food poisoning causes people's head to explode minutes after eating.

And they say porn doesn't have a plot

#monsterdon Buddy, there is no pain a slug could inflict to your fingers that is worse than chopping off your own hand.

It's not like they're zombies. You don't have to chop your hand off to avoid becoming a slug.

🦆🦆 J Riley 🪿

ohiofi

Oops! Wrong slugs! #monsterdon #wrongfrogs

I'm gonna request that we do something from the Golden Age of monster movies, like Attack of the Giant Leeches or The Killer Shrews. Or we could do Invasion of the Star Creatures again. Anything not in the 80s.
#monsterdon

Slugs 2: The Wrath of Khan

OldRustBucket@techhub.social

OldRustBucket

This movie....#Monsterdon

#monsterdon I don't think slugs return home to a central breeding ground.

We should check to make sure they do that before we make any plans.

this movie is really about the townspeople realizing that they were who they needed all along, that they don't need to wait for the permission of the state to solve their own problems, and they are powerful only as far as the bonds between each other make them #monsterdon

I would just leave town. It would be easy for me.

🦆🦆 J Riley 🪿

ohiofi

S.L.U.G. Sewer Lurkers Unleashing Gore

"It could blow up the whole town? Let's DO IT!" #Monsterdon

The thing is, we're about forty minutes into this masterpiece and we haven't yet addressed the fundamental tension in this film, which is: how do creatures well known for being very slow, even sluggish, manage to present a pulse-pounding threat to life and limb?

I'm getting the feeling that we're going to gloss over that question for the next 45 minutes. Glide over it frictionlessly, even, as if on a carpet of slime.

#monsterdon So, the plot point is they accidentally ate slugs the size of a banana?

Am I following that correctly?

so far the slugs are completely innocent. the first kill was in a LAKE and slugs are TERRESTRIAL. the second kill was WORMS. i will not sit idly by and have the good name of slugs dragged through the mud. or dragged out of the mud since they actually like being dragged around in the mud #monsterdon

John Overholt

overholt@glammr.us

The slugs crawl in
The slugs crawl out
The slugs play pinochle
On your snout
#Monsterdon

THOSE were not slugs, those were WORMS. we are NOT doing this again, movies named after one animal and not being about that animal #monsterdon

Sure, softly talking to someone who's underwater always works.
#monsterdon

[slug voice] I will get my reeeeveeeennngee!

yes! EXPLOSIONS! and fire!

For pete's sake, can we make it through one movie from the 70s/80s without a gratuitous sexual assault? Nobody needed that. (The slug murdering, sure, that's fine, that can stay.)

RobotDiver@starlite.rodeo

Oh good, an attempted rape scene, I was wondering what this film was missing. -_-; #Monsterdon

Robot Diver 🌊🌬️🍃🌿🌸🌱🌱🌱

@apLundell

Nobody drinks enough water in the 80s. It's all gatorade and capri sun.

"Mike, there are miles of sewers down there."

"That's why where we're going to get them all in one place."

"How are you going to do that? Invite them all over for hamburgers?"

A hamburger party worked for Critters 2!!

You know what else wouldn't blow up the whole town? Sober, non-naked, non-poisoned non-elderly humans with shovels and a desire for change

#monsterdon Why are half the characters in this movie dubbed over?

wait he's got a burger, fries, AND peas and gravy?

Whacking slugs in the kitchen sink with a frying pan is a scene that will stick with me, I think. Might need to make a GIF out of that, except that I really want to keep the halfhearted "donk, donk" sound too

Wasn't there an X Files episode about flukes and toxic waste?

John Overholt

overholt@glammr.us

[dramatic closeup of lettuce] #Monsterdon

John Overholt

overholt@glammr.us

If the goat killer kills people why is he called the goat killer? #Monsterdon

I will never get over how weird it is seeing an office desk without a computer...it's like "What are you doing all day?"

someone call up the soundtrack and tell it that it doesn't get to put "upbeat hero's walk through the town square" over riding around in a cop car #monsterdon

#Monsterdon negative slugs to make up for the positive slugs we'll be seeing later

it's a zero-slug game

"But this BORING"

They're telegraphing it early

Someone pointed out that the experience of #monsterdon is better than any of the movies and that's even more true than usual this week.

Terencio

@Lazarou On the bright side, at least the dog survived too. #monsterdon

[empty]

allanb

@moira @Taweret

opening weekend $15,842
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slugs_(1988_film)#cite_note-3

Mother Bones

_L1vY_@mstdn.social

Okay, I get the "single menacing slug that remains," but realistically.
The slugs were all over town by that time! Coming out of people's faucets and toilets!
They'd be chasing them down for weeks, if not months.

Some practical effects team was REALLY proud of their underwater-fountain-of-blood effect and wanted as many chances to show it off as possible.

(RIP, Don.)

And speaking of effects, with like six minutes left, it looks like every remaining dollar is being poured into a montage of gasoline explosions blowing sewer access covers off all across the city thanks to that lithium arsenic nonsense! 🔥💥

So they ignite the methane, which explodes killing the slugs. They have to destroy the town to save it, just like in 'Nam

That's an above-and-beyond rescue attempt. Dang.

#Monsterdon <clerks voice> "this isn't even supposed to *be* here!"

#monsterdon LOVE me some hand-drawn electricity.

#monsterdon Slugs sure make a loud chirping noise.

[empty]

allanb

Girl who was just assaulted goes alone into woods only to get assaulted again and now she's in the sewer.

Not her night

David Zaslavsky

diazona@techhub.social

@CactuarJoe To be fair, black pepper would also spice this film up

And then maybe it would get someone to finally think of the salt

the lead man character has an embouchure like you get after a lifetime of playing the french horn and i am obsessed with watching him say words #monsterdon

There's no way they're making those slugs seem threatening, no matter how much the musical cue is trying

The problem is, they don't really move.

gwildor

jivens

#monsterdon YEAH! Lithium is so combustible when it comes into contact with water that the dew point matters!!

That water department looks suspiciously like the school's headmaster's office.