LAMEST FUCKING TWIST EVER

WE LITERALLY SAW THIS COMING AN HOUR AGO

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon Aw, it's cheating to intentionally use a crappy "VHS Viewfinder" filter so you can hide your crappy morph.

everyone needs to stop poking the alien plant anuses

#monsterdon

I don't think it was BAD so much as it was just WEAK. Like, that was love in a canoe coffee if I've ever had it.

#Monsterdon

you could have made that goo literally any other color

#monsterdon

Ed? Who's Ed? Who are ANY of these people? #Monsterdon

There's no day/night cycle in this part of the country, the dark just kinda sloshes around loose. #Monsterdon

Full Moon Entertainment?

looks out window Holy crap! It's about RIGHT NOW!!!

#monsterdon

It's kind of impressive how dull they've managed to make an alien invasion. #Monsterdon

People in horror movies seeing something horrifying and bizarre: “I should get my face right up in there for a good look. Maybe poke it with a stick!” #Monsterdon

And so they fucked off and took over the world. Which was only an unpredictable outcome if you've never seen a horror movie before.

That was a lot of fun, fam. I'm not gonna lie, the Owlbear wasn't expecting a cross between Invasion of the Body Snatchers and Critters doused in Valium, but then, how could anyone?

Imma go to bed now. Take care of each other. Be kind, spread love, form midnight giant prune brigades.

Goodnight 😴

#Monsterdon #SeedPeople1992

NO ONE CARES, JUST ROLL CRED- THANK YOU

GOD YOU'RE SO LAME

#Monsterdon

"You can't kill a cactus with a bullet" - Sun Tzu

#Monsterdon

It's true, it's real, and you know because the big twist at the end of this film is gonna be that you're a plant monster too! #Monsterdon

lol, this is the sort of twist I thought would be really cool when writing it aged 12

#Monsterdon

Seed Theft Auto

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

Loading pods in the back of a pickup truck? Don’t show any emotion?

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

#monsterdon If I ran a police station, I would lock the gun cabinet.

Just a crazy idea I had.

VHS tape repair? hell yea, I'm here for it.

#Monsterdon

"come look at my funny rock"
"not on the first date, mister."

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon

This is really impressively boring. They managed to make a monster fight on top of a moving truck dull. #Monsterdon

oh my god i can't believe they are actually going through with the menacing housekeeper subplot jesus christ #monsterdon

"What about BRAD and FRANK"

And STEVE and SCOUT and BOBBY and PINHEAD and

#Monsterdon

I'm losin' track of the Nutty Townsfolk here, guys. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon oh no he got Kix'd!!!!!!!!!!

#monsterdon Looks like humans will be replaced by a species that is identical, but works together in perfect harmony with complete efficiency.

Damn!

Shoulda called the movie "The Germinator"

#monsterdon

Calling it now, final one-line of the movie: "LET THERE BE LIGHT"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon "We need your UV Lights! That's why you're immune!"

So, anyway, once we take these lights you're going to be killed by aliens.

Nobody can hide behind a spindly tree as well as the guy wrapped in fluorescent tubes.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon #seedpeople

@aredridel I totally transplanted tapes from broken shells into new ones as a teenager. These were the skills of my people.

#monsterdon #SeedPeople1992

#monsterdon I miss the days when you could get broken media working by futzing with it instead of "welp, SD card is dead"

"CURSES, I FORGOT HOW TO ROLL WHICH WOULD BE PERFECT FOR CHASING THIS WHEELED VEHICLE DOWN IF i WANTED"

#monsterdon

I'm not sure if the monsters are injuring more people than the drivers are at this point.

#monsterdon

Oh, he's pickling. Nice job. #Monsterdon

I’m kind of face blind, so all the indistinguishable characters is pretty much par for the course for me. #Monsterdon

CARBON DATING MENTIONED

#Monsterdon

Fair play to this movie in that things are happening unlike last weekend's movie

it's confusing and pointless, but things are happening!

#Monsterdon

this is just typical American driving I assume

#Monsterdon

So how long is it going to take these people to figure out that plant monsters are vulnerable to fire? Longer than the Day of the Triffids people?

#monsterdon #SeedPeople1992

So far all the characters could die and I would not care

#Monsterdon

Oh it's her from Babylon 5!

Watch out, she's working for Psi Corps!

#Monsterdon

And so this boring root of a budding histamine overdose fucks off into the grass or something look this shit was dull.

Thank you to @Taweret and company as usual. Have a good evening and don't forget to have a salad.

#monsterdon

Seed People (1992) 2/5

fumbled a perfectly good rolling walnut alien by not doing anything

#monsterdon #monsterdonReviews

Well yeah that was a waste of film, mostly because of how dull it was! Loved the practical effects.

See y'all next week for #monsterdon ! Be sure to thank our host @Taweret on your way out. Big hand to @cherizilla for bingo and @JoeWynne for trivia as always.

I need to go soak my head in the sink to wake up.

See, there's just absolutely no tension here. I don't give a quarter shit about literally anyone in this film, that's one of the issues you face when you populate your film with nothing but obnoxious assholes. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Buddy, you can save batteries. It's day-time. There's UV anywhere.

This movie's gone on too long. Ironically, I'm wilting. #Monsterdon

lol, I love how anybody can just pick up those guns in the police station....

#Monsterdon

TOM!!!!! IT'S TIME FOR THE REVEAL! WE'VE GOT A THIRD ACT TO START! #Monsterdon

Who wore it better?

#monsterdon

PROPAGATOR emeritus?!

#Monsterdon

No, I am not a telepathic plant bug monster from outer space

why do you ask

#Monsterdon

Fluorescent light headband where to buy

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

@jonny Don't feed it after midnight, or get it wet.

#monsterdon

What in the ding dong doodle heckamadoodle hell is that? #Monsterdon

Oh no, he's covered in Sugar Pops!

#monsterdon #SeedPeople1992

He's being covered with Kix! That poor bastard, they're kid tested, mother approved! #Monsterdon

DAMN IT you people tricked me into watching another Critters movie

#Monsterdon

In the category of Cheap Movie Hobbled by Irritating Frame Narration, I give #seedpeople1992 3 out of 5 stars. About halfway in, it became clear that the only thing that would justify the frame would be the revelation that our hero was talking to a Seed Person. Sure enough, they went for it. It did surprise me that there was no final desparate struggle, just Cut to Black, Monster wins. Yay?

The great, goopy monsters are a good sign of a Charles Band production, though this was no Reanimator, or even The Pit and the Pendulum. The humans were a confusing collection of annoying jerks, born to be monster fodder. I found this about right for #monsterdon: mostly dumb, but not completely terrible.

Thanks @Taweret for hosting, @cherizilla for the Bingo, @miru for the stream.

#monsterdon For this kind of movie, the ending was so expected that it's a wonder our hero didn't see it coming.

Too good to be a weird bad movie. But had too many annoying holes in terms of good movie criteria.

#Monsterdon #Seedpeople1992

alright so the movie was about like how idk you need to pay attention to the exact wavelength of light that UV emitters produce in determining whether they are effective at deactivating seed people i guess #monsterdon

Just one more thing. I'm an alien. #Monsterdon

The very first time a car fell off a cliff and exploded for a good reason

#Monsterdon #Seedpeople1992

I like the alien's kill technique. First one pins the human down and oozes BBQ sauce all over them while the second tickles the victim to death. #Monsterdon

Scully you're not gonna believe this

#monsterdon

#monsterdon "You can't kill a cactus with a gun!"

Yeah, you need a Triffid Gun.

@ottaross Narrator: “He just watched.”

#Monsterdon

I think this may be the most nondescript hero we've had outside of the 1950s. Like, he's a cypher. #Monsterdon

If it bleeds we can shuck it

#monsterdon

"Creepers, hoppers, parachuters!"

Lovers, dancers and fools! #Monsterdon

Yes, make sure you split up so that you can't be sure they're who they are later on, that's important. #Monsterdon

MIDI flourish on the soundtrack, probably the best part of it so far #Monsterdon

oh fuck, she's wearing the denim jacket, what the fuck are these people?

#Monsterdon

This whodunnit is really boring, just get eaten already, would you please? #Monsterdon

just watching that blonde girl struggle with that gigantic camera reminds us how far we've come, now the cameras are so small you can't see them........oh...

#Monsterdon

Nancy Drew's about to get in trouble, I think. #Monsterdon

You probably thought this was a meteorite…

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

"Something wrong, Mister Bates?"

Maybe he had a blood vessel pop. Just stroked off for a moment. #Monsterdon

"Whoops, sorry, I thought this was the men's room. My bad." #Monsterdon

Can people just start getting eaten already, I'm getting bored. #Monsterdon

Where’s the Log Lady when you need her?

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

WHAT IN THE DING DONG HECKAMADOODLE IS THAT THING

#monsterdon

@CactuarJoe Minimum overdrive

#monsterdon

"Almost everyone in Comet Valley was acting weird."

It was hard to tell because of the hack writing, so just trust me. #Monsterdon

The first appearance of a monster looked like they just combined all the left over monster parts the props department had on hand.

#Monsterdon

Yeah discharge like that means you need to see an arborist immediately. #monsterdon

These characters talk like NPCs in a video game, how pioneering in 1992

#Monsterdon

The acting and dialogue is already off the scale...oh my, check out the framing device

#Monsterdon

What if Zack Gilligan is really trapped in a Wax Universe and that's why we've never seen him since the early 90s?

Trapped in a Sisyphean torment of horror clichés

#Monsterdon

It ain't no "Watch the skies!" ending, that's for sure

it's good to be back in the swing of #Monsterdon

No one: “what a surprise twist ending”

#monsterdon #seedpeople1992

oh nooooooooo

anyway

#Monsterdon

I thought you couldn’t shoot a cactus #monsterdon

after the way you treated him doc died for your sins #monsterdon

THEY DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER BLOWING UP THE ALIEN YOU PEOPLE ARE FUCKING LOSERS #Monsterdon

I’m very confused by the UV light thing. Plants like UV light, daylight has UV, what’s the deal? #monsterdon