Remember, when you reach a new island it's important to lay down on the beach and get sand in your pants. #Monsterdon

Land ahoy! Looking suitably oppressive. #monsterdon

@WhiskeySailor well, he sure couldn't keep his mind on reefing the fucking sails. #monsterdon #matango

@jonny
Thank you! I think we forget about this check every now and then.
#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon "The BONE-IN Islands"? Really, dude?

the boning islands lolololol

#Monsterdon #Matango #monsterdong

It's an island! Is land!

Nice black sand beach.

#Monsterdon

There's only two women on the boat, the islands can't be THAT bonin'. #Monsterdon

lol the Bonin Islands

#monsterdon

hey man dont foist your heteronormativity on the rest of us, you're just a fucking dipshit #monsterdon

that’s right! It’s all about a woman with a guillotine!!
So Stfu!

#Monsterdon
#Matango

@kurth at least they're all doing it inside the boat instead of out in the open air where you could get away from it.
#monsterdon

Dude, you'd think the PUA can stop negging her by now

#Monsterdon

"Girls and boats don't mix"

And thus concludes this episode of "Will it blend"

#Monsterdon

Here on Gilligan's Isle!

#Monsterdon #Matango

so that's a no on the bechdel pass thing huh #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Ah, it’s Plot Exposition Radio Station. I hear they have a TV channel too.

*Everybody* smoke. Oh, and more of the passengers are wearing that same necklace.

#Monsterdon

Yeah, sure, it was the women who made you fuck up basic sailing, sure buddy, sure.
#Monsterdon

@sean I was still hoping for a mushroom ship

#Monsterdon

"When will this fog clear up", she said as she spewed smoke into the tiny cabin #monsterdon #attackofthemushroompeople

is there anyone *not* smoking? #Monsterdon

Why haven't they started voting on who gets eaten first? #monsterdon #matango

Trapped on a boat is bad enough, but trapped with a guy trying to learn the ukulele is just cruel.

#monsterdon

it's the Black Pearl. this movie's about to get a lot more interesting. #monsterdon

I have a low opinion of this crew TBH
#Monsterdon

it’s the jawa sandcrawler! #monsterdon

#Monsterdon was that a second ship?

OK this music is slightly more appropriate. they could die on their strangely stationary boat!!

#Monsterdon
#Matango

@msh And a millionaire!

#Monsterdon

score is really good #Monsterdon

There really is a lotta hey in this film, huh. #Monsterdon

Character synopsis over a (remarkably rapid) radio news report on the missing yacht. Excellent! #monsterdon

Battery dies just as the broadcast ends. Nice touch. #monsterdon #matango

i think the monkey will devour them all, in the end. #monsterdon

@jonny thanks for clearing that up :D #monsterdon

@himbovoorhees Piggy's leading the Mushroom People.

#Monsterdon #Matango

wait is that the same monkey from the Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders MST3K I was watching just before this #monsterdon

Man, these guys are like a master class of what not to do in a crisis. Make sure you immediately start devouring all your supplies and have a competency crisis! #Monsterdon

"the millionaire and his wife"
#monsterdon

which one of them is the Piggy in this scenario #monsterdon

Checkov's radio #Monsterdon

Jazz makes everything better why not

#Monsterdon

That guy ruined her monkey dance!
#monsterdon

"it's all over" unfortunately, i think not, sir. #monsterdon

i am so pleased at how many people on #monsterdon know about boats like you see how they didn't hoist up the yardarm and keel hauled the aft rudder trimming to anchor tack the weld lines

oh hey music

i guess the professor can make a radio out of coconuts!

#Monsterdon #Matango

#Monsterdon Skipper? Pfft. *MUD*skipper, more like.

@neia Well I have not seen any aliens, so yeah...

Though I haven't seen any killer mushrooms yet either so I might prefer your movie

#Monsterdon

_Direction finder_.

"Compass" is too technical today?

#Monsterdon #Matango

Last time I rented a car, it looked like that boat. #monsterdon #matango

I’ve been watching Yellowjackets, i know what happens now. #Monsterdon #Matango

#Monsterdon "It'll be fine. Some duct tape and a net, and we'll be good as new."

"We can only hope they'll start a search for us"

Oh sure, if there's one thing I know for sure it's that everybody wants the rich assholes back ASAP. #Monsterdon

Well, drifting is better than sinking.

#Monsterdon

@jonny@neuromatch.social Maybe? I haven't seen a sail boat, and nobody's commenting on the bunny, so...

#Monsterdon #Matango

@lorgonumputz I don't think that's all that much money for a ship of that size #monsterdon

Is it deserted?

Lady, I got here the same time as you, how should I know?

#Monsterdon

See, that is why you proper fold and secure the sail on the boom so it doesn't get ripped apart
#Monsterdon

"just open and shut your mouth a bunch of times and flop around, everyone will think you’re drowned! no acting necessary!"

#Monsterdon
#Matango

hey! hey! hey! #monsterdon

Is that still the best boat money can buy? #monsterdon #matango

@neia taking desynchronization across 10 different versions of a movie to new heights #monsterdon

whoops, hope you didn't need that mast. #monsterdon

It'll be interested to see mushroom monsters because you cannot kill them in a way that matters...if we even get monsters. #monsterdon

Oh good, the first thing you want to do in a crisis is start assigning blame. That's super important. :P #Monsterdon

I'm like 80% sure I got the wrong movie but there are aliens so good enough?

#Monsterdon #Matango

#Monsterdon Yes, during a bad storm on a sailboat is a *perfect* time to flirt.

oh no the telegraph pole broke, no wonder the radio doesn't work!

#Monsterdon #Matango

They're on the Sloop John B #monsterdon

The shots of the miniature ship in the storm are A+. #Monsterdon #Matango

oi, let's not malign all writers, just coz this one's a douchnozzle. just throw him off the ship and let nature short itself out. #monsterdon

@trixter nah it was a different economy then, they upgraded in 1981

#Monsterdon

they found the water. It is weirdly intermittent though. weirdly intermittent water problem. 😂

#Monsterdon
#Matango

The model ship is very good, I think they're filming it in slo-mo? It's working, makes it seem almost real

#Monsterdon

Shot in my great aunt's crapper. #monsterdon #matango

@paco Wow! #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon Sorry I'm late, guys. What did I miss? More importantly: has there been coffee? #CoffeeReportStatus

at least someone brought their plushie

#monsterdon

@Louisa interesting...my mom was a 60s bombshell

#Monsterdon

uh oh somebody's doing morse code, shit's in the fire now

#Monsterdon #Matango

A professor of psychology! At least we have some sort of academic expertise on board.

#Monsterdon

why is this guy trying to discuss PUA tactics in the middle of a driving storm #monsterdon

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of a fateful trip.
It's Sunday Night on #monsterdon, aboard a tiny ship.
The mate was a might sailing man
The skipper wore his shades
If not for the film from Toho Scope
These jokes could not be made...

#monsterdon and there IS a professor on board. Not a great sign...

I get seasick in seas that high, too honey. No worries. #monsterdon #matango

so, when they all sink, it's this lady's fault, for saying the ship never would? #monsterdon

Yes, use the girl feeling sick as the excuse to go back. Sure, kid. #Monsterdon

Don't worry this yacht will never sink, because it cost so much money. You never heard of the Titanic, lady?

#Monsterdon

"You're a professor of psychology, ain't ya?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you make a radio out of coconuts?"

#Monsterdon

That's not psychology!
(takes out cigar)
Now that's psychology!

#Monsterdon

@moira ahh gotcha 👍

#Monsterdon

I have some harsh criticism of this skipper TBH
#Monsterdon

40 million yen in 1960s dollars using 1960s exchange rates is... okay yeah that's still a lot of money and he got ripped off something fierce

#Monsterdon #Matango

#monsterdon okay so last week we learned that if "The Professor" from Gilligan's isle comes down the dock you should get off the boat like now. New Gilligan rule. If the crew is dressed like this _get off the boat like now_

playing at 1.5x speed to catch up and we are getting some serious slapstick vibes off this storm #monsterdon

#Monsterdon “I’ve got work to do, I’m the skipper.” Yes, I’m sure he has serious skipping to do.

Yes, the crazy rich people are indeed strange. Let me tell you about this submersible…

I love how the exterior shots of the boat show the boat heeling and rocking at like 40 degrees, but the inside is like a river cruise. Is this boat a swinging saloon? If so maybe it IS the best money can buy. #monsterdon #matango

I'd say we just had a Bechdel pass there, but the girl on the right didn't actually _say_ anything? Does that count for Bechdel if only one of the two women talks about something that isn't a man?

#Monsterdon

"sinister orchestral music" fair enough. #monsterdon