BUT WHAT ABOUT ACAPULCO!??

#monsterdon

I gotta think that Peggy Schinofen was pretty busy in this film. Perhaps even the MVP. Because there was a LOT of boom.
#monsterdon

@MargaretSefton Hooray! You "picked" a doozy to get started with

#Monsterdon

But I am enjoying the gayness of it all #monsterdon

'Goddamn you, you laserblastin’ son-of-a-bitch! There was only nine Democrats in the whole county and you just ’sploded eight of them!'

#monsterdon

ok. that's over. #monsterdon

Laserblast made me so angry, I had to write my own take. I have fifty-odd books out. I should know better. But noooo, I had to write an alien blaster that turns you green novel with actual story.

I'm gonna throw one "back my kickstarter" plea out there for #Laserblasted. If nothing else, watch the video. https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/mwlucas/mwls-next-1-april-book

I promise story, character, an ending, and lots and lots of griping about the 80s.

Mahnola Dargis said this movie was better than Anora and The Brutalist combined.

#Monsterdon

Oh the laserblaster disappears of Billy's arm between cuts. I guess that gun fires gun disintigrator rays???
#Monsterdon #Laserblast

Laserblast? More like Loserblast, amiright?

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

As much as we always give #Monsterdon movies a hard time for lack of denouement, I have to imagine that if this movie had one it could only have made things worse

Well... that was a blast. A laser blast. This is the movie they show to other movies in movie prison, as punishment. #monsterdon #laserblast

Oh, so they returned to finish the job and just fucked off then, did they? Typical.

Thanks for a ... bad movie. That was fun. :)
#Monsterdon #LaserBlast

I'm beginning to think this movie's not very good. He's just wrecking a shitty neighborhood now. How does that advance the cursed amulet's agenda‽

HE SHOT A MAILBOX! That's a Federal offense, knockoff Luke.

#monsterdon #laserblast

I like the excited airhorn sound effect for the alien's weapon. Really brought the hype to that scene! Just need a t-shirt cannon or some confetti to go with it. Wouldn't have made the ending more abrupt and surprising. #monsterdon

Aliens heard of confirmed kill but also don't believe in it

#monsterdon

Did Tony Craig have any function in this plot? Or was the actor just related to the executive producer and short on funds? So many questions #monsterdon

Bleugh. I really hate Laserblast. Fuck Laserblast :/

#Monsterdon

Okay, here comes the "appreciate to the following" list, these are the people you don't forgive.

#monsterdon #laserblast

You know, I like movies where they don't reveal everything and let the audience figure out, but this one is outrageous lazy.
#monsterdon

@SnoopJ Did they though? Or did he go back to normal

I don't know, and does anyone?

No.

#Monsterdon

This ending was better than Romeo and Juliet at least.

#Monsterdon #Laserblast1978

The "Mythbusters" team had add a lot of C4 to get the car to blow-up like that.

#monsterdon

The Moral of the Story:

Don’t wear necklaces with a tiny pineapple on it.

#monsterdon

I cannot believe Roddy McDowall was in this turd. 😆

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

Yay, I can go back to my podcast and sewing! Thanks once again to the lovely @Taweret for the incredible PEW PEW, and you can read that as laser blasts or as someone holding their nose, either way! :D

#Monsterdon
#Laserblast

@RobynGoodfellow @Taweret No! Only when it was FUNNY!

#monsterdon #laserblast

The moral is that Franny has got to get herself out of this town populated by every sort of deplorable specimen of humanity #monsterdon

and the aliens saved the day

#monsterdon

and wow it just sort of ends. classic #monsterdon

In a way, the REAL villain was Star Wars… because it raised expectations of what a movie could be

#monsterdon

I appreciate that all of the characters have last names.

#Monsterdon

Wait, that's it? At least the shelless turtles took the weapon this time.
#monsterdon

@brooke

Yes! That was all clarified in the instructions from their boss!

#Monsterdon

"You never outgrow your need for milk!" #Monsterdon #laserblast

#Monsterdon Inconsisitent. The turtle creatures vaporized the last guy. This time they just tanning boothed Billy back to normal. Dead or asleep? Doesn’t matter.

#monsterdon If your Tubi reccomends An American Tail, and its sequel: Fievel Goes West, that's just because it's grouping by films that Leonard Maltin thinks are just as good as this one, Laserblast.

'Can your heart stand the SHOCKING FACTS about…Carjackers from Outer Space!?'

#monsterdon

Why is she wearing a Boy Scout shirt?

Sure that's the kind of thing I would have worn in high school but I wasn't the kind of person who'd tell their significant other to be more ordinary.

#monsterdon #laserblast

holy butts yeah that sucked

thanks for uhhhhhhhh exploding cars 🫡

#monsterdon

Could do with about 22% less splayage, movie

#Monsterdon

Is that a stun ray, or what? There's no blood or chunks. Aaaand did the Chelonians forget to pick up their damned laser again? #monsterdon #laserblast

No moral theater.

#monsterdon

And, roll those crispy credits. We're done here.

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

@hollie That would require that an explanation exists

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon I-

Nobody in this movie seems to be phased by any of the alien stuff!
#Monsterdon

Yeah I don't feel like reading the news anymore, either.
#Monsterdon #LaserBlast

#Monsterdon so this time instead of the gun that vaporizes the bad guy but leaves his weapon intact, they used the gun that vaporizes his weapon but leaves the guy intact

it's taking an awful long time to gun Billy down here, compared to the last time. Logically, they're doing something different.

No, don't think. Thinking would ruins the experience. #monsterdon

Alien turtle butt to the rescue!

Also, death dance reminded me of a similar scene from Liquid Sky.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon was Leonard Maltin high when he saw this?

#Monsterdon 👦 🔦 🚀 💥👽 🔦 🚀 💥👾 😱

Chick in the Webalos shirt: don't touch it it's evil!

Billy is a tragic figure, he was just a sweet boy with a nice chest who played with a laser phallus and now he must be eviscerated.

#Monsterdon

Where did the gun go? #Monsterdon

'Twas <strike>beauty</strike> aliens that killed the beast!

#Monsterdon

Don't forget the...laserblaster
#monsterdon

Look at that disco outfit on the G-man! #monsterdon

MOST PREDICTABLE ENDING EVER

#Monsterdon

"...well, that should do it. Let's get out of here."

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

They sure took their time... #monsterdon

Stop motion aliens are, ah, pretty tall.

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

#Monsterdon meanwhile, his mom is in Acapulco filming 'LaserFinger-blaster.' #Monsterdon

@s20
They're not as popular today as they were then.

#Monsterdon

The actor portraying Billy would later file for a workman’s comp claim after dislocating several joints and tearing ligaments from swinging that laserblaster around.

#Monsterdon #Laserblast1978

Droopy drawers takes Billy down with extreme prejudice. "My work here is done, peace out" #monsterdon

#Monsterdon 👦 🔦 🚀 💥👽 🔦 🚀 💥👾 😱

LASERBLASTED!

Oh, the aliens are big!

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

Auditioned for the part of 'Chong', washed-out.

#monsterdon

okay I enjoyed that shot

#Monsterdon

HELL YEAH ALIEN SPACE RAYS

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon

It was the 80s.
Everyone wore cowboy hats over helmets when driving.

woah sudden scale shift for Turtle 2

#monsterdon #laserblast

@kshernandez I could tell you a majillion other reasons to not to drive Uber...

#Monsterdon

The pacing of this #Monsterdon is all over the place but I'm totally here for the slow motion mass destruction!

@RobynGoodfellow oh that was a thing? That sounds like my dream

#Monsterdon

Ha ha we saw this movie many times but we're better! Faaar out!
#monsterdon #laserblast

ZZZZZZZZZZAP!!!!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

#monsterdon

"we're not allowed to blow up the prop buildings, so get all the random junk you can and blow that up." #monsterdon

@kcarr2015 #Monsterdon

Is billy dancing The Laserblasters Waltz? (Lesser known cousin of the log drivers waltz)

#Monsterdon

Oh, yeah. I forgot about the Washington dude, with all that laser dancing.

#Monsterdon #Laserblast

Idk. He just laserblasted a bunch of human beings. I don't know if blowing up a news stand was the climax they thought it was.

#monsterdon

whoa... #monsterdon never pick up hitchhikers. Don't driver Uber...

You don't see many candy and paper stores anymore these days. #Monsterdon #Laserblast

Oh the newsstandity! #monsterdon

How did the AirTag make his teeth all pointy like that? #monsterdon

Did I accidentally change the playback speed or has the slow mo gotten even slower?
#Monsterdon #Laserblast

Fake News TAKE THAT! #monsterdon

yay, a mailbox filled with dynamite! #monsterdon

Hey, at least this movie has a rainbow poster.

Was the rainbow flag a thing when this movie was made?

#Monsterdon

I don't think napalm is particularly sculptable? I always thought it was more of a goo/gel but I've never handled it myself (a friend supposedly made some by accident once, but it was well before we met).

#Monsterdon

I feel like he should be making more chimpanzee noises. #monsterdon #laserblast

And fuck you news stand!

#monsterdon

ok NOW he's done it, the mail cops are gonna shred him

#monsterdon

And a classically abrupt ending for #monsterdon

-Fin

#laserblast

that mailbox shouldda thought about that before it started shit talking billy's mom. #monsterdon

Guess Billy hates reading too
#monsterdon

I hate newsstands! #monsterdon

I'm just gonna ignore how he went from the middle of the desert to somewhere downtown.

#monsterdon

Why blow up the star wars sign. dude. #Monsterdon