#Monsterdon “Stay away from hill today” … so uh she’s gonna get spider killed.

Have you ever made your sister in law cry in a dating sim with an alternate romance choice?
#Monsterdon #KingdomoftheSpiders

I do appreciate the way this script gives decent lines to the Couple of Color #monsterdon

@Lazarou once they were men

now they are arachnids

#monsterdon #KingdomeOfTheSpiders

Don’t worry Ellie girl I still got one good arm to hold ya. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon John Ford Cowboy Movie Music

@jonny
Try not to overthink it. Thinking in general is not recommended during this feature.

#Monsterdon

Burn the mound without knowing what the spiders will do? Yikes. This will be as bad as lighting the spider up and having it set the whole house aflame.

#monsterdon

When a man says he's gonna be fine that many times y'get the distinct impression we're about to have a needlessly destructive truck crash scene. #Monsterdon

The only web in this film is between a couple women who seem inexplicably attracted to this massive creep. #monsterdon

@lambtor ? You can filter the tag #monsterdon and they all go away? If you are on Mastodon I can give you screenshots of how to do it

I suppose I could watch it asynchronously and just queue up the hashtag. Yeah, that's not gonna happen. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon the producers of the film were evil after all.

wow what an ass. no wonder all the women are turning into lesbians in this town #monsterdon

Fire: The Untamed Element, Oldest of Man's Mysteries, Giver of warmth, Destroyer of forests, right now this Spider Hill is on fire!
#Monsterdon #KingdomoftheSpiders

Rack you dipshit you don’t get to bring your new love interest to your show-burning love interest’s house and pretend that’s cool. #monsterdon

Why is she crying exactly?

#monsterdon

Some lovely country #monsterdon

Where are they going with the Shatner romances? Is one of these women going to die or are they going for a thruple?

#Monsterdon

OOOOOOOKlahoma where the wiiiind comes sweeeeping down the plaaaaaain #Monsterdon

Asking my brother's grieving widow who I'm not NOT interested in if I have permission to smooch another lady, but only after I have done this, and telling myself it is women's liberation

#Monsterdon

this movie's woven a real web of intrigue

oh wait

it hasn't

#monsterdon #KingdomeOfTheSpiders

🦖#Monsterdon

🕷️ KINGDOM OF THE TRIVIA 🕷️

Tarantulas are afraid of people, so filmmakers had to use air blowers and other devices to "push" the tarantulas toward the actors.

@Taweret ikr

Seems like some explosives would have been appropriate

#Monsterdon

the kid tried to save her from this film, but she just had to stop and remember her lines, didn't she. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon Spider Escape Tunnels?!?

@Taweret Well eight maybe #monsterdon

Surely the script said "hold my beer" at this point.... #monsterdon

spiders, always thinking ten moves ahead

#monsterdon

You can see steel or plastic escape tubes they built into the dirt

#monsterdon

Aw crud, I forgot #Monsterdon. Have fun y'all, like I need to say that.

If only they thought to put fire *inside* the hill where the spiders actually are. #Monsterdon

In our defense we never expected the spiders would deploy the insidious underhanded strategy of "leaving out the back." #Monsterdon

STOP TOUCHING WITHOUT ASKING HOLY SHIT #MONSTERDON

Walt is not chill. #Monsterdon

Wondering if Mothra could be asked to help the tarantulas (I know they're not insects) #monsterdon

There was an escape tube?!?

What a twist! #monsterdon

@nev and no shotgun as a prop #monsterdon

I liked that little piano sting to punctuate the spider-hill burning scene.

#Monsterdon

Me: Is this kerosene? Diesel? What are they burning?
Flames leap uncontrollably
Me: Oh. Hydrazine I guess.

#monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

Little known spider fact: They're all preppers, always ready with a bug-out bag and multiple escape routes. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon From our watch party: what if they join together into one giant spider?

"Alright boys, initiate the retreat plan! Regroup at the pass, we'll arm up and retaliate at dawn!" #Monsterdon

#monsterdon The spiders just want their food

I do appreciate the fact that they resorted to "kill it with fire" pretty much right away.

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

I am Mrs Sammy Davis Junior and no spiders gonna run me off! #Monsterdon

If these spiders are immune to DDT, what's to say they aren't immune to fire as well?

And if they're immune to fire, they're all spiderfood.

#Monsterdon

"burn you sons of bitches"
- the audience, after the movie, probably. #monsterdon

Humans are the real monsters for using insecticides. Yep, environmental message sort of movie that kinda fits Them as well.
#monsterdon

leave the spiders alone

#monsterdon

Oh, they're spider witches!

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

I wish she was hanging out with the cabin lady instead of this strange sexual tension with the widow
#Monsterdon

@NovaCora It's reminding me of a certain class of romance novel that you start and realize how bad it's going to be a chapter in. Usually because you forgot to check the author's feminist and/or queer cred before you picked it up.

#Monsterdon

This is the third film I've seen with Woody Strode in it. Saw him in Spartacus and Once Upon a Time In The West. He died in both of them. Hoping Woody makes it alive in this one. #Monsterdon

Wait. When was the last time we saw a movie that shot night for night? I'm so used to day for night for the last few months.,
#Monsterdon #KingdomoftheSpiders

This conflagration is why we can't have a nice climate #monsterdon

They want to sing "Burn spider hill, spider inferno"

but the spiders are singing "staying alive, staying alive"

#monsterdon

"Are you crazy, lady? This is our home. And no damn spiders are gonna run us out."—a line an actress had to deliver with a completely straight face

#Monsterdon

This is our home, and no damn spiders are gonna run us out

Right up there with I'm sick of all these snakes on my motherfucking plane

#monsterdon

another bechdel test. damn, for all it's terrible EnShattening, this movies got ladies with some actual lines. #monsterdon

The cow is still breathing.

Too bad they don't have a Vet nearby that could try to save it.

#monsterdon

@moira I do feel bad for that ranching couple and their bad luck, losing their probably-prize calf like that. #Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

So that's why it got unnaturally quiet? Because the bull was about to charge through the fence? #Monsterdon

All the crickets topped - because of the spiders.

Cue bull with spiders (literally) stuck all over it.

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

how are you gonna burn down a pile of dirt?

#monsterdon

@diazona

🎶 Nice work if you can get it. 🎶

#Monsterdon

Many spiders and livestock were injured during the filming of this masterpiece. #Monsterdon

don't give me nothing

nothing i can do

people love it when you lose

to a million spiders

#monsterdon #KingdomeOfTheSpiders

...and it WORKED

🤦🤦🤦🤦🤦

#Monsterdon

Shatner prefers it noisy.

#monsterdon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1WemnsB98o

Shatner is definitely the creepiest part of this movie so far #Monsterdon

Pesticides arent getting them here. The woods are FULL of garden spiders in summer #monsterdon

IDK if I can keep watching. WHY did Lady Scientist suddenly return to Shatner's icky advances! #Monsterdon

#monsterdon Satan possessed a cow.

Aww Shat is petting the tarantula while threatening to burn all it's family to death. Good but incongruous acting.
#Monsterdon #KingdomoftheSpiders

Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy!

#monsterdon
#KingdomOfTheSpiders

Spider Cow, Spider Cow, doing what ever a Spider Cow does ...

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

"We're here for the same reason."

Except we didn't bring any fuel or tools. So good job Farmer Colby, glad you were here.

#monsterdon

Didn't see that cattle jump scare coming #monsterdon

@Taweret so fucking unearned too
#Monsterdon

Y'know, for all the warnings @Taweret put out about the spiders, I think Shat's incessant horniness if far more filter-worthy >_> #Monsterdon

Checking on the doctor’s credentials. Wouldn’t have done it to a man.
#monsterdon

Any experienced exterminator will tell you the only way to deal with most infestations is fire. #Monsterdon

@JoeWynne That seems like a lot in those days

#Monsterdon

"It's quiet" "Too quiet."

#monsterdon #KingdomeOfTheSpiders

Milking a spider. Now I’ve seen everything

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

Too quiet

#monsterdon
#KingdomOfTheSpiders

Entomologist lady can't keep her accent under control. But she's really good at animal handling with the spiders and Shatner. He's a horn dog.
#Monsterdon #KingdomoftheSpiders

It's quiet...too quiet #monsterdon

Rooting for the spiders, who's with me? #monsterdon

Why burn the hill at night if they're nocturnal though

#Monsterdon

No!!! why would the entymologist Shat herself like that?

#Monsterdon

How do you burn down a mound? Like you could burn the surface of it, but how do you get the fire down in?

#Monsterdon #KingdomOfTheSpiders

The dialogue makes it feel like this movie plodding along but the plot feels like it's actually RACING into the third act?

At least we were saved from extended "romance"

#Monsterdon

"Maybe we should just burn it."

Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. #monsterdon

I don't think I was prepared for how very 70s this movie is;
'nam, women's lib, leaded gas, DDT, Shatner making out with an entomologist...

#monsterdon

Horny Shatner gonna horny shatner. #Monsterdon

Kill all men with fire #monsterdon #kingdomofthespiders

The tarantulas are cooperating instead of eating each other. Sounds like Adversaries become Allies. ✅ #Monsterdon

Yeaaah!

#Monsterdon spider lady rules!