Talos has an Achilles heel

#monsterdon
#JasonandtheArgonauts

Oh hey, the off switch.

#monsterdon #jasonandtheargonauts

So Jason named the boat after the boat wright & the crew are named after the boat so is this all about setting Argo up as a patsy for the several lawsuits this quest will result in? #Monsterdon

This version of Shadow of the Colossus is actually pretty good!

#monsterdon #jasonandtheargonauts

I tell you again, do not look directly at Talos' taint! DO NOT

#monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts

Hercules you caused this mess you fix it. Throw it into space #Monsterdon

Don't touch the treasure you idiot. Go back and get the goat!

#monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Run away! Run away!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon If the Goddess had told me not to waste one of my wishes, I would not have wasted it.

#monsterdon finally though, a fuckable Hercules

Those dudes are catching some gnarly waves. Surfin' Jason style.

#monsterdon

why does zeus need a robot army?

#monsterdon

"There's a point if you put in too much detail (in a matte painting) it looks fake, and of course if you don't put in enough detail it looks fake." -- Ray

#monsterdon

Anyway we sail to the bronze island. two argonauts... Hercules and... somebody else... go chase after a goat to eat and find some giant bronze god statues then they find a treasure room from which they take some spears. But taking spears makes the giant statues mad so one starts moving and glaring at them, then enters pursuit.

#monsterdon

Ok, Herc. It's time to give the hairpin back. #Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts 🍿🎥

Oh no, they've lost the Hera-head!

#Monsterdon

Oh Star Trek shakycam, is there nothing you can't improve :D #Monsterdon

fuck YOU, fuck your BOAT, fuck your GODDESS, strong LETTER TO FOLLOW

#monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

Thoughts notes on the Argo in this movie

it looks extremely cool.
it uses two rowers per oar, which I would be strange for an ancient Greek ship in either the bronze or classical era; they normally had one rower for oar and just added a silly number of oars.
with the walkway in the middle, I think it's a bit wider than most greek warships would be.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon

Talos needs some WD-40

Talos is going to flash them...

#Monsterdon

Worst upskirt ever.

#Monsterdon

Please no more shots of the old man in the diaper, from any angle #Monsterdon

Ah - Gibraltar origin story.

#monsterdon

I think this encounter might be SLIGHTLY above your level, chaps. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon 200 men on the ship go on, 100 couples come off it… ;)

It's pretty early for them to fuck of into the sea isn't it?

#monsterdon

Talos with the bad knees. #Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts 🍿🎥

The Big Bronze Statues are EXCELLENT :ablobcatrave: #Monsterdon

MARINES we are OUTTA HERE

leave no man behind you said fuck that noise we out

#monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

Excellent claymation! That statue is Awesome.

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

One does not simply steal from Talos. #Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts 🍿🎥

Hercules is kind of a dude/lad/dick in this film #Monsterdon

That's what I sound like Monday morning.

#monsterdon #jasonandtheargonauts

Ah do we have monster-sign?
(sort-of?)
#Monsterdon

"It must've been the wind." - Famous Last Words of the Skyrim guards

#monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts

Time for an ancient bronze mecha battle scene!
#Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts

Ruh roh!

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

I have little confidence in this Hercules could he even throw ANYTHING into orbit? #Monsterdon

Yeah Talos, go smite some foo's

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Uh oh... what was the one thing Jason said! Shesh! Some folks just don't listen. #Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts 🍿🎥

Hercules is not being heroic.

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Your big mouth Hercules...

#Monsterdon

Herc, ya doof

#Monsterdon

Yes it's easy to confuse a javelin with a brooch pin, what with them being the same size and all

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Uh oh - someone's going to want to fill his pockets… aw drat, nobody has any pockets.

#monsterdon

@Lazarou Oh I hope so

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Holy moly, look at those pearls! (or, alien eggs)

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

Wonderful camera depth trickery. #Monsterdon

I have a feeling we are getting close to some classic Ray magic
#monsterdon

Ah, Talos, which inspired the Iron Golem in D&D #monsterdon

*bleats in protest*

#monsterdon

My animation sense is tingling.

#monsterdon

this is why you're not supposed to take anything, the gods get real mad if you fuck with their minis

#monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

Hey! Herky! LEAVE THEM KIDS ALONE! #Monsterdon #JasonandtheArgonauts (1963)

I feel like the parts of Greek myths that are like "our wonderful voyage was marred when we went ashore and my men did some bullshit I told them not to do" are likely to be grounded in historical fact

#Monsterdon

I liked Lou Ferrigno’s Hercules better. This Hercules is a bumbling idiot.

#Monsterdon

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963 please tell me they're gonna have to fight this dude

Oh that's a Harryhausen statue right there. #Monsterdon

"or thirsty"

*makes bedroom eyes at the goats*

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

@jadebees Probably not but we couldn't possibly have that level of awareness in a #Monsterdon movie

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

"Goats? What do you want with goats aboard ship?"

*coughs*

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

"Some of us might be hungry. Or thirsty. I could totes drink a goat."

#Monsterdon

@allanb
Talos?

#monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

This movie not only has a boat in it, but that boat seems to be a full-sized galley, which is extremely cool.

Boats are neat.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon

Five days, no water, time to set the sail!

Jason's next calling upon Hera for help: "Great queen of the gods, could I talk you into maybe getting rid of the brass section at the back of the boat? They're really, really loud."

#Monsterdon

Anyway we got some beefcakes to drive our ship so we need a ship, and luckily we find a shipwright named Argo who has just built a galley that Jason immediately takes over and names it after the builder.

Also the figurehead is on the stern and is a head of Hera with blinking eyes so it can give advice I guess.

#monsterdon

I bet for sure someone takes something other than food and water and there are consequences. #monsterdon

@TerryHancock Hera-hausen

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

a full bosom, which never referred to breasts

#Monsterdon

Statues open their eyes. Jason and the technicolor acid trip. #monsterdon

so is he actually Hercules or just a guy named Hercules?

#monsterdon

What if SHE wanted you to stop Hercules?

#Monsterdon

"Set sail!"

I would ask why the sails were not already set, but of course I know that the answer is so that Jason can say "set sail!"

#Monsterdon

"Your entreaty to the Gods is very important to us. Please say by the statue and a representative will be with you in the order in which your prayer was received...."

#monsterdon #jasonandtheargonauts

#Monsterdon

Watching the gods watching the movie.

Give me three sips, three sips towards the door...

#Monsterdon
#JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

✅ Technology Unlocked: BRONZE

#Monsterdon

"Hi, me again, ship, I need another boon."

#Monsterdon

#monsterdon The eyes open and close?! This isn't Squid Game, dammit!

Did this really need a matte???

#Monsterdon

Why is the steersman rowing with the rudder??

#Monsterdon

"I'll steer - now, where's the wheel?"

#monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

There's kinda a lot of diapers in this movie. #Monsterdon

@Binder She's such a fujoshi.

#Monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

There's always pee
#Monsterdon

Every underdog story has the 'coming together as a team' montage.... #monsterdon

Creepy Hera always watching those sailors do nautical stuff at night. #Monsterdon

I like that they remembered that Hercules sailed with the Argonauts after he completed the Twelve Labors, which makes him older than the others. Plus he's wearing his lion skin!

#Monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

I gotta say this for this movie:

1. It's kind of a refreshing change of pace to see Hera NOT being a vengeful bitch, and

2. I also kinda like that Hercules is actually kinda older? This Herc's got some salt-and-pepper going on.

#monsterdon

Careful, the hulls have eyes

#Monsterdon #JasonAndTheArgonauts1963

And we use the term "sailing" loosely on this ship. it's more like rowing until you drop

#Monsterdon

MEN! MANLY MEN, IN THE FULL BLOOM OF THEIR MANLINESS! #Monsterdon

They did some good work on that ship.

#Monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

We now go to a sweaty athletics montage where Jason watches the heroes of greece wrestle, swim and shoot things to recruit the crew for his fleece recovering boat.

#monsterdon

"Hey Hylas, you seem smart. How about I let YOU make the decisions on who to tell about my secrets?" -- Jason, who is not people-smart, in #JasonandtheArgonauts (1963) #Monsterdon

Something made me put it Hera

GET IT ar ar ar ar ar ar ar

#monsterdon #JaconAndTheArgonauts1963

Sadly, day for night shots were pretty bad in these days.

#Monsterdon