OMG the aliens are basically from the creepy plant of Little Shop of Horrors but with legs

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 #Alt4Me

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!

#Monsterdon

no wonder more than half of us GenXers grew up to trust no one. that kid's American Dream is a fucking nightmare.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

I feel slighting violated having seen that and I don't know why

That ending felt like a slap in the face and not in a good way, like in a "how do we end this with no Sea in sight?"

#monsterdon

isn't that creepy teacher the same woman who played the nurse in One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest?!?! that movie effed me up.

#Monsterdon

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WHY ARE THEY DOING THE IT WAS ALL A DREAM THING?!?!

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

OH C'MON!!!! those are the worse parents in the planet!

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

LOL, are you fucking kidding me?

That's the ending?

Kid walks in on his parents having wild alien sex?

but why was this?

#monsterdon

It was all a dream and they fucked off into the sky

#monsterdon

It's Krang!

#monsterdon

@paco "collects own specimens" was probably on her resume. They were fine with it

#monsterdon

#monsterdon All mockery aside, this film is doing a really good job of centering the perspective of the kid and using the cinematographic conventions of horror films to really illustrate his paranoia. It would work even without the heavy-handed soundtrack.

#monsterdon Ah yes, Mrs. Gardner has clearly become a pod person because she burned an entire plate of bacon, something no normal human breakfast-preparer ever does or has ever done *guilty cough*

accounting in the age before Excel

#Monsterdon

AH! the american automatic weapons with endless ammunition

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

that scientist was a liberal, wasn't he: ooooh, let's just talk to the creepy shit that want to kill us all

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

#monsterdon "Marines have no qualms about killing martians!"

*single crystalline tear of appreciation for this perfect moment*

"Badges? We don't need no steenkin' badges!"

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Wild applause for these creature designs

Nurse Ratched/Kai Winn would absolutely have a creepy van

#monsterdon

There is not a single man in this movie I trust, is this what being a Woman is like?

#monsterdon

Anyway, I would like to say that I think cinema needs more neutral aliens. Like we got the good aliens, like the venus dudes who want to stop nuclear war, and we get the evil aliens, who send zombies to take over earth, but #monsterdon doesn't have too many *neutral* aliens.

This seems strange to me, as most people are kind of neutral, so maybe most aliens should be neutral too? They can have neutral goals like stamp collecting or winning a bake-off.

#InvadersFromMars1986

@Configures @ramsey @brooke I bet it is a Vonnegut reference. I'm pretty sure the "we don't carry change in combat" is a Dr. Strangelove reference

#monsterdon

I really, really hate the narrative device of "It was all a dream" as much as I hate nonsensical "oh here we go again" endings.
This one has given me indigestion

#monsterdon

Stupid Martians, the Belt is full of copper, but you really came here for the weird alien sex, didn't you?

#monsterdon

#monsterdon And that's a wreck! David Gardner appears to be having some kind of mental break and/or aliens did actually land, then attempt to flee and were exploded in mid-air, then landed again? Or something? But the aliens-or-not-aliens definitely did not fuck off into space _or_ the sea.

I don't know y'all, I think I preferred the original! This one was fun though, and definitely more slag-worthy.

Thank you @Taweret@octodon.social for hosting! Thank you @cheribaker for the bingo card!

@lapis Everything comes back to Ea Nasir, everything....#Monsterdon #EaNasir

There's an Ea Nasir joke about this copper thing but it's late over here in Sumeria

#monsterdon

Oh do not give me "IT "WAS ALL A DREAM"

#monsterdon

"i wasn't trained for this" is the old, "this s above my pay grade"

LOL

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Always with the PROBE, like every alien....

#monsterdon

BTW the copper wire theft hasn't stopped

"Metal Thieves Are Stripping America’s Cities - The New York Times

https://www.nytimes.com/2024/07/09/us/copper-theft-heavy-metal.html

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 We learn that the alien zombies are stealing copper wire, which matches the father stealing the kid's pennies. My guess is that they need copper to make their little zombie control devices, but that might be wrong.

that NASA font though.

iconic.

#Monsterdon

they even managed to make the military base look extra creepy

#Monsterdon

USMC + NASA base? I have additional questions

#monsterdon

Do all US Generals get cigars?

I like how they wear their camouflage in the office, really standing out

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 following the biology teacher, we reach the space dance floor, where a Dnyarri overlord is lowered onto a throne so the biology teacher can teach them vowels. Fortunately, this Dnyarri has lost both its telepathy and its aristocratic southern accent, so it just kind of grunts and makes the neck-back lights glow. He is attended by two spherical potato goblins.

All of them figure out that they're being watched by the kid and chase him away with some spotlights.

#monsterdon "We'll take a walk, after you do the dishes."

"After _I_ do the dishes?? .... George, you're acting very strange."

Stab him! Stab him stab him stab him stab him

I am ready for tonight's #monsterdon!

@jonny this new family unit is going straight to Jerry Springer I think.... #monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 anyway the movie is closing down and they might fake us out with some thing where it was not actually a dream or it was a dream within a dream or the aliens are going to invade anyway or the mom is a zombie, but I kind of... um... just don't care that much?

@paco we're all assuming that was it's mouth and not some kind of toothed cloaca arrangement #monsterdon

Apparently, the biology teacher has taught the martian supreme leader to talk, who taunts the kid by saying "poor little guy" in a weird voice. Then the goblins eat the biology teacher for no reason I can discern; I guess they get bored with their pets and eat them sometime. The kid runs off to try to rescue the nice nurse lady from the zombie machine.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO THEY GOT RINOLDI!!!

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL AN UTILITY VEHICLE! fuck yeah for old school Jeeps

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

I'm glad the General is doing what the 10 year old boy tells him, that will sound good in the following Inquiry #Monsterdon

CHECK HER NECK!!!!

#Monsterdon

@diazona @Lazarou

Facts. I once got in trouble for asking why the Chief Engineer could smoke cigars on the main deck of the ship, and I was getting in trouble for smoking in a non-designated area.

"Because he's the CHENG!!" was the answer

#monsterdon

WTAF the school have a whole damn nuclear reactor for a boiler room.

#Monsterdon

Why is an adult woman letting a 10 year old boy call the shots?

#monsterdon

Invaders from Mars, or How An Entire Race Of Aliens Came To Earth To Gaslight A Little Boy #monsterdon

I would expect any bio teacher who was that woodsy to have better footwear

#monsterdon

#monsterdon "You know that whatever you tell me stays in this room. I'm the nurse, David."

Oof, does that line ever land harder now than back in 1986. Remember when kids actually had that kind of expectation of privacy? When it was _not_ normal for public institutions and private enterprises to insinuate a thin film of surveillance and betrayal into every interaction kids have with authority?

"DON'T TOUCH ME, I'M BAJOR'S MOST POWERFUL RELIGIOUS FIGURE!"

#monsterdon

@north "but you can leave your hat on"

#monsterdon

LOl @ frog eating, good jump scare.

That IS Kai Winn, the child is right to run.

#monsterdon

WHY IS HE GOING IN THERE?!?!?!

#MONSTERDON

@SnoopJ I mean let's not start on the two guys strolling casually out of the bushes who seem to know a LOT about each other... 🤣

#monsterdon

I immediately don't trust those two policemen, alien invasion or not.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon I think we're supposed to infer from his wooden stumbling around, single missing slipper, surgical wound in the back of his neck, and inability to handle a cup of coffee that the kid's father has been taken over by martians.

However the verisimilitude of this scene is its undoing since this is precisely how I perambulate and masticate before coffee too

lol, if that's the film I think it is that kid should NOT be watching it, it has TITS!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Whoops, I accidentally toggled on the French subtitles there for a second and they are... way, way off?

Fortunately I can just turn those off and I'm sure the film will immediately return to being completely coherent.

Goofs
Real titles in outer space would not make whooshing sounds or leave perfect trails behind them.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

OMG this has Karen Black?!?! and these flying titles... it's so 1980s video arcade, Space Invaders shit

#Monsterdon

@gnomon big 'Space Force' energy with how they hold all the weapons #monsterdon

FUCK YOUR PARENTS DUDE!!!

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

#monsterdon They are trying to Dallas us all. LOL

Okay, so anyway, we machinegunned the Dnyarri and he ran away. Then we saved the nice nurse by using an anti-tank rocket against the scary needle machine. The aliens are trying to escape and locked us in, but the kid uses his lucky penny to reload an alien egg phaser, digging the soldiers out of the underground prison.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

#monsterdon "Mom, Dad, please understand: I love you, but I just can't come with you."

"It was the coffee thing, right? Or was it the bacon thing?"

@amyfou what are those things for, they aren't for grabbing! #monsterdon

An M47 Dragon! (Which means they technically managed to escalate over a bazooka!)

#monsterdon

the kid started like a liberal and got radicalized real quick.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

"LINDA! LINDA!"

Ok kid, let's talk about 'boundaries'

#monsterdon

If it bleeds, we can kill it.

#monsterdon

This general really loves Renaldi in a don't ask don't tell kinda way, doesn't he?

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 I have to say that I really like the alien designs in this movie for the potato goblins. They're sort of like quadrupedal pac-men, only green, and with goofy little arms on the sides of their head? Very neat.

yeah, bring civilians to the Sarlaac pit, excellent move

#monsterdon

@whknott Yeah you sorta would have expected him being eaten whole

#monsterdon

OMG, I just realized where I've seen the scientist guy before. It's Harold from Harold and Maude!

#monsterdon

the white picket fences, though

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

You'd think the military would be more interested in this brain control technology

#monsterdon

"you better hurry, or you just might blow it"

even American dad's body snatched by aliens can't help themselves with a #dadjoke

#Monsterdon

I mean, if you're into conductors... have you met gold yet?

#monsterdon

They should have gone for a nice round bomb which said 'Bomb' on it.

#monsterdon

They're here for our copper. First it was the pennies, now big spools of wire.

#monsterdon

Alien copper thieves, I guess. Now upgrading to entire spools.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 we go to the school to hide fro the aliens and call the FBI, but the phones are dead and we make too much noise hiding in the boiler room, alerting the now space zombie cops. The nurse is like "what the fuck am i doing why am i doing this." and the kid is like "its okay to be scared lady" and the cops run around waving flashlights.

@north ACAB

#monsterdon

@neia Now you know where all the global warming came from

#monsterdon

predatory kidnapper biology teacher in a bus LOL
#monsterdon

lol, those guys in the orange jumpsuits were doomed

feed the Sarlaac!

#monsterdon

Hi #Monsterdon, what's your favorite martian spaceship set dressing?
#InvadersFromMars1986

The only solution I see is for the Nurse to strap a load of bombs to the blond child and send him into the cave , for the greater good.

The ONLY solution.

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 having eluded his very near sighted biology teacher, the kid wanders through some sandy terrain and finds a smooth glowing tunnel, which was probably made by aliens and is probably where the spaceship was hiding.

He explores this dungeon and we see some cool practical effects as a weird bug technology looking sliding door opens and he follows the biology teacher in to watch her commune with Very Round Aliens around a dance floor.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 anyway, the kid goes to the nice nurse lady, and tells her everything the audience knows, after checking to make sure that she doesn't have a thing on the back of her neck. the nice nurse lady protects the kid from the biology teacher and helps him escape; he hides in the biology teacher's van; the biology teacher revealing that the parents plan to convert the child.

we get a montage of spooky biology props ooo spoooky!.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars So far this movie seems a little better than the original, in that it is doing a better job at being unsettling. It seems to be playing more on the distrust children have of adults than the original. Also, the sound track is tense and doesn't quite slap but is still pretty good.

However, so far there is not near enough gratuitous tank footage, the original movie's main redeeming quality.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 characters so far
astronomer kid
suburban dad (space zombie)
suburban mom (space zombie)
biology teacher lady (space zombie)
nice nurse lady
spooky cops (space zombies)
spooky phone guy (space zombie)
other girl child (possible space zombie?)
other boy child

so far none of these characters are tanks, to my dismay. there is a spaceship character though, but it is invisible now.

@Bluedepth bet she'll start going on about Pah Wraiths in a bit...

#monsterdon

uuurrrghh, this child is not a good actor and it's starting to hurt me

#monsterdon