She's eating frogs, isn't she

#monsterdon

The white child has learned at a good age not to cooperate with the Police

#monsterdon

90 percent of children in 80s movies are annoying

At least.

#monsterdon

that's not how you make beef tartar

#Monsterdon

Are the aliens short on copper?

#monsterdon

“The Hill” has been in more than a few movies. #monsterdon

Lol, Dad is acting so weird it's like he'll be wearing a stupid red hat and shooting up Ivermectin

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Someone needs to make a Tobe Hooper Christmas Ornament, an untuned television showing snow and static.

#monsterdon "No Dad, it wasn't ball lightning, I know what that looks like!"

Do you, kid?? That incredibly rare phenomenon that was almost never been recorded??

Clearly it's not just the telescope his parents got him, this kid has been steeped in the spirit of scientific inquiry and investigation of the natural sciences! Good lad.

@OldRustBucket they only moved the headstones!!!!!

#monsterdon

@bunnyhero @ramsey try the archive version

#monsterdon

ngl, 80s child has some cool toys

All plastic in the Sea now....

#monsterdon

#monsterdon credits in spaaace!

oooh i had never seen that MGM opening before #Monsterdon

@blogdiva Oh, I dunno. The parents in Time Bandits were pretty clueless.
The kid told them not to touch it! It was pure evil! So what do they do?

They touch it, of course. And then we're left with a time traveling orphan. Good job, guys.

#monsterdon

It was all just a dream is the worst writer's cop out ever

#monsterdon

@moira @apLundell The brain toad has strong meme potential IMO

#Monsterdon

Disappointed we didn't get to see the little girl set a house on fire in this version, though. #monsterdon

@Configures @srol This could have been a clay tablet!
#JokesAboutCuneiformInAntiquity
#monsterdon

And the mean teacher becomes a villain. Of course she does. A villain who drives around in a van full of bones.

I feel like this movie had more fun with the "It's all being imagined by a child" twist than the original did.

Maybe they could be more blatant because they assumed audiences would already know the ending? #monsterdon

so what i'm saying is that we have the rumsfeldian quartet of invaders from mars endings

which means we need a fourth movie for "unknown knowns" - real aliens with uncertain resolution

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Ed is still in the forest. You can almost hear him and all those Marines, moaning across the sand pit. Oh Ed, so coquettish.

I don't know what the "MP" on their armbands stands for but I'm just gonna go with Moist Person. #monsterdon

The movie we got did not live up to the swoopy opening credits in my estimation #monsterdon

One thing I both like and dislike about tonight's #monsterdon film, and its predecessor, is that the plot only makes sense after you know it's the invention of a young boy's mind.

It's a trick that feels too easy for the writers. Like they shouldn't be allowed to take that short cut. But I have to admit they did it well.

#monsterdon And another quick end! Thanks @Taweret@octodon.social for another great Monsterdon!

Disclaimer: this film was not intended to cause 80s' kids nightmares

#monsterdon

that doohickey

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Maybe the frog guy is like a queen and the others are worker bees, so they're different variants of the same species? Or maybe the frog guy has enslaved the potato goblins? Or maybe the frog guy is a special genetically engineered specialist designed by the potato goblins to do strategy for them?

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Linda's script for this whole act is shouting "DAVID!"

Did the boy write it?

#monsterdon

linda david linda david linda david

#monsterdon

If you haven’t got a penny, a haypenny will do #Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

While we get an action scene with some M16s blasting a Dnyarri protected by a lightning forcefield, I'm gonna ask, what is the relationship between the supreme intelligence and the potato goblins? Are they even the same species? Because the potato goblin looks way more alien than the froglike boss guy.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

haha it's got a slot for pennies

#monsterdon

#monsterdon Did anyone happen to catch exactly which branch of the military these folks in the fatigues actually are? Is this an army or a navy operation?

#monsterdon The mind control implant machine moves seductively slow. Like it savors the smooth thrust into the brainstem.

The copper bar's writing is not cunieform

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 the surviving scientist and the marines are making their way through the dungeon tunnel; the scientist remarks that they are smelting copper, a revelation that is met with disinterest.

While the nurse is presumably getting zombified, the evil biology teacher takes the kid to talk to the "Supreme Martian Intelligence", who is the Dnyarri frog brain with the weird chair. The kid appeals to him for mercy toward humankind then gets shocked.

Gotta say, the Krang creature is impressing me, his psychic belligerence, the ick, great stuff!

#monsterdon

Those monsters must have been conceptualized by a 14 year old, but they are actually amusing
#monsterdon

David's priority list,
1 nurse he's bossing around
2 Mom

...that's it. Sorry dad.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon The, uh

I don't know how to say this but

Those winch lines hauling the soldiers out of that sand whirlpool

Those lines are not taut. Ain't nobody pullin' nothin'

finally, the aliens are tearing the boy apart, sweet release....

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 The marines and scientists discover the sand tunnel and start entering it, encountering two quadrupedal potato goblins. The nerd scientist tries to communicate with the aliens, which normally I'm all for, but these aliens have kind of demonstrated clear hostile intent.

Proving my point, after a brief effort at communication, the aliens opt to phaser the scientist, leading the marines to shoot them.

#monsterdon *soldier fires a bazooka at the two aliens in a fully enclosed underground area while surrounded by like two dozen other soldiers*

*someone just off-camera tosses two five-gallon buckets of rubber intestines covered in ketchup at the bazooka soldier*

@paco Lucky nobody was behind that thing

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 the surround sequence makes me think that this movie might be following the original one's plotline more closely, albeit with higher production values.

the kid seems to be having doubts about the implied violence of the military perimeter, probably worried that his now zombie parents will be killed, and suggests negotiation. this approach is stalled when a marine falls into the sandbox and is eaten by an evil merry go round.

All those teeth and they spit laser beams???

I think someone had some effects budget left over and wanted to use it

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 A little over an hour into this movie and we finally get some gratuitous military vehicles as the marines are called into surround the sandpit. Unfortunately these are not cool retro M10 tank destroyers but rather more boring contemporary trucks and armored cars; oh well.

Our brave marines and their nerd scientist friends discover a dungeon entrance. Someone deploys one of those giant baseball stadium light things, only its orange.

haha
Who wants to go down first?

#monsterdon

@CactuarJoe "Never point your weapon at anything you're not willing to destoy"

#monsterdon

i have had to mute a kabillion this movie because the sound editing is stressing me out. well done 1980s director.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

#monsterdon Shooting at a truck loaded with liquid oxygen? That'll be a warm sort of campfire when it goes off. Just the teeniest of kabooms.

I have launch window questions

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars outside the evil zombie dad hands a weird detonator to another guy next to the Nasa warehouse, so he can blow stuff up.

The kid and nurse tell their weird story to the general, who is suspicious, but the general's aid, who I will call Captain Clemens, reports that nasa did indeed see a UFO last night. The kid tries to explain stealth technology. The general decides to play it safe and orders a security check on the nasa guys who were eaten by the sandpit.

"The Millennium Project"

Remember when that sounded like the Future and not the Past?

Man, Time is scary...

urrghh, he's trying to act again...

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars the kid has the plan to complain to the authorities, specifically a general guy, who decides to meet with them on his secret GI Joe base. On the way in, we see the dudes who were sucked into the sandpit doing some work on a NASA thing outside the army base.

We meet the general in his room that collects retro CRT computers, who kindly lets us see the back of his neck so we can conclude that he's not a space zombie.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 okay while typing that last post, i missed a bunch of weird shit, where the cops find the kid and the nurse, say "we're from the police, we're here to help!" and then immediately draw guns to shoot them, which I figure only 14% of all US police encounters probably end like these days (25% if you are black).

As they are about to die, they are saved by an earthquake as a glowing spinning merry go round from space breaks through the floor.

#monsterdon Disembodied brains with faces, weird physically distorted sentient creatures, tunnelling crafts emerging from deep beneath the earth - this movie definitely sketched out some themes that were later explored in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 I'm gonna guess that this movie ends as more of a downer than the original's initial ending, where we eventually report the alien threat to the authorities and they solve the problem with large numbers of tanks.

They are definitely going more through the mechanics of "how to hide from the authorities" and "also don't trust no one" compared to the more paternalistic original movie.

It slices. It dices. It juliennes!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 the nurse explains that she couldn't contact the police, so she's gonna try with the FBI, hopefully summoning Fox Mulder and Dana Scully who will appear in the 80s via the magic of wormholes.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 a sandbox eating some people convinces the nurse that the kid is not lying, so she goes to call the police. however, the biology teacher has taken the class on a field trip to the alien sandpit, and then spots him having escaped and tries to kidnap him. He fails his escape check and runs away, escaping into the nurse's car.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 the kid escapes and is found by the nurse; he tries to explain all the weird bullshit he just saw. she follows him back to where the space tunnel was, but it is gone, matching past experiences in this movie where the kid tries to show ominous things to adults.

the nurse is no longer believing the kid. however, the plot thickens as some orange clad dudes with metal detectors walk on the sandpit where the tunnel used to be and they get sucked in.

Okay, I just found out that David is actor Hunter Carson, Karen Black's son. That explains some things.

#monsterdon

To be fair to Kai Winn/Nurse Ratched, she's many things but she is not a runner....

#monsterdon

LOL @ "Oh not the field trip" from a boy who cannot act

#monsterdon

This film was released like two months after Critters (1986) #Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Looks like they reskinned the Skekis from the Dark Crystal

#monsterdon

Worst. Guard. Dogs. Evar.

They didn't do jack squat.
#monsterdon

Going for a child friendly HR Giger vibe with some of the interior

#monsterdon

That slow dolly zoom while the nurse is talking to the parents is kind of creepy. #Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Really cool trolley zoom effect in that hallway shot. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 investigating, the kid follows his teacher to the secret sample room and catches her eating frogs. that is unnatural behavior; you are supposed to vivisect frogs in this society and not eat them, because we have rules.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 the parents decide to loom over the kid, say that he's not feeling and well and that they should go to a picnic on top of the hill, which makes the child suspicious. They attempt to suppress this suspicion with an awkward hug.

@brooke Hey, the cabinets in my apartment are in the same style!

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 additional evil zombie like people have appeared in the form of two cops, who also make normal earthling conversation.

I will stress to the casual viewer that these are not the shambling type zombies. they are more like "yes please do not notice that i am six space ferrets in a human suit please" type characters who just act off and do weird things. Like right now on my screen the dad is stealing the kids pennies for some reason... that's weird?

genuinely disturbing 'creepy dad in scared boy's bedroom' vibe. He better be a fucking alien puppet....and what's with the pennies?

Ulp, Mom's a gonna now

#monsterdon

Special meeting...
New hookup...

Look, pal, just tell your wife that you're leaving her for Ed.

#Monsterdon

This kid has so many cool toys, no wonder the Soviet Union was jealous.

#monsterdon

@CactuarJoe This is literally why they don't dissect frogs in jr high anymore, so, I guess it's reasonably realistic?

#monsterdon

Kid, don't sneak up to your dad when he's having a mental breakdown, you don't need to see this

#monsterdon

Become uncontrollable

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986

Frog Baseball!!!!!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon He was wearing an Edgar-suit! LOL.

#Monsterdon #InvadersFromMars1986 we start the movie with a happy white suburban family that looks exactly like you would expect, except the kid is doing an astronomy and was probably into Carl Sagan's cosmos. He is rewarded for taking a nap with a vintage penny.

Anyway, there was a scary flash outside that might be evil aliens.

"I know what ball lighting is"

This child knows a lot, maybe too much...

#monsterdon

Gee the set is almost identical to the 1950s version

#monsterdon

launching my #monsterdon thread for #InvadersFromMars1986! Monsterdon is the thing where we watch a monster movie every week and make fun of it; please mute the hash tag if this sounds not fun to you.

We watched the original before; if I recall it was mostly bad, but it had lots of tanks (or rather, M10 tank destroyers) in it, and that was mildly redeeming. So far this one has lots of words flying by, and that is also kind of neat.

I'm pretty sure I had that exact same solar system poster as a kid.

#monsterdon

The opening score reminds me of Predator, a better movie about alien bastards

#monsterdon

I remember Cannon group, they owned the cinema in my town

lol "Timothy's bottom"

#monsterdon

@Zerofactorial You are so right! I TOTALLY FORGOT about those opening credits by the end of the movie! Did not live up to the hype promised by that scroll!

#monsterdon

#monsterdon "Marines have no qualms about killing martians."

Most of the dialog has been pretty mid but that's fantastic cheese.

Quite surprising that a 1986 film of this caliber had no gratuitous boobs at all. #monsterdon

Well that was something. Thanks @Taweret for hosting another #monsterdon, have a good week everyone, sleep well with your pennies and see you next time ❤️

@moira The doctor (because that’s what she was in the ’53 version) was a much better character than the nurse. She started out okay this version, but as the story progressed, she got weaker and weaker as a character. #Monsterdon

#Monsterdon

They stuck with the ending I didn't like in the original movie. They did add the "Nooooo" at the end, which I guess indicated the parents were gotten immediately?

I guess they were using the whole "the monster never dies" trope that I seem to recall was a seventies/eighties thing.

Martian invasion movies just make me want to watch Mars Attacks again.

#Monsterdon

@diazona @randy_s Well, sort of. All You Need Is Kill is the book that Edge of Tomorrow is loosely based on.

#monsterdon