#Monsterdon Gargoyle has wings, chooses to walk back to its den. 🧐

Sex Pest Lead Gargoyle sounds like the fucking narrator. #monsterdon #gargoyles72

@OldRustBucket@universeodon.com these are their wild cousins that don't get invited to the family reunion

#monsterdon

Bill Cosby's fantasy. #Monsterdon

Well, they took the door off to get Diana out, why didn't they just rip off another door to get their pal out?

#monsterdon

lol, bad breath knocked her out

#monsterdon

Put the body in the trunk was never a great plan

#monsterdon

Pretty sure three human beings can push over car, it's not that supernatural

#monsterdon

"It's the gar-boys"

#monsterdon

lol, that jump scare with the dad was like that Simpsons gag where Homer comes in with the knife for hot brownies

#monsterdon

It's like they've never seen a horror movie before. #monsterdon

#Monsterdon #Gargoyles1972

BUT I'M HORNY NOW

#monsterdon

Put a shirt on, dad. #monsterdon

Mrs Parks! Drink!

#monsterdon

A chicken in every pot and a gargoyle in every room.

#monsterdon

same

#Monsterdon

He needs to indulge in his scream fetish, in private this time. #Monsterdon

That wonderful Texas weather

#monsterdon

Are those Texas cops going to execute those hippies?

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon Do not buy that police car at auction.

Wait, are these guys Mexican cops?

#monsterdon

Now that's what I call riding shotgun

#monsterdon

Dirt bike hooligans! #monsterdon

#Monsterdon I thought they had separate rooms? Also DO NOT WAKE YOUR DAUGHTER UP WITH HER OWN SCREAMS

You'll love the room. Most of our guests don't get mauled here. #monsterdon

Thirsty hotel manager is my new favorite character. #monsterdon

well that escalated quickly. and they leave the scene of the crime. that's qwhite normal, innit?

#monsterdon

We have HBO and complimentary doom. #monsterdon

Gargoyles: attacking
Humans: screaming

Foley department: furiously playing the spoons

🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄

#Monsterdon

"You're in luck, my speciality in car repair is removing claws marks...."

#monsterdon

#monsterdon anyway wizened hat guy locks his door so no one can jump into their demon interview which they record using one of them magnetic tape players. Then a Horror Sequence ensues as a claw cuts through their house, which is made of tent! The lady screams and then the house burns down.

Makeshift Bikini Girl and Captain Demonology drive away, reminiscing on this incident when a Gargoyle thing appears on the roof of their car; on no its another Horror Sequence!

*sneaks up to the car and writes WASH ME on it at the gas station* #Monsterdon

Aw man, the gargoyles are bad at this time of year!#Monsterdon

That scream alone should be enough to get rid of the monsters.

#monsterdon

WHAT IS THIS pots and pans soundtrack i am OBSESSED #monsterdon

Plus, evidence that you fled a murder in Mexico, and stole some stuff

#monsterdon

There's going to be a whole bunch of disappointed tourists now, unless someone bothers to take down those road signs. #Monsterdon

This is why it's important to properly store your hazardous chemicals kids #monsterdon

More like uncompassionate and cold-blooded

#monsterdon

i feel like just driving away from a burning house with a dead guy in it is gonna look bad to the cops, but you guys do you

#monsterdon

Well, he's as GOOD as dead now

#monsterdon

#monsterdon MONSTER CLAW

I would expect a biped with arms AND wings to have a really complex shoulder arrangement, and a huge ass sternum/keelbone.

#monsterdon #gargoyles72

#monsterdon

There's no soundtrack. That's the majority of my shtick.

Hmm, yes, this will look great in my 'I don't pay for therapy' collection. #monsterdon

That jean-dress doesn't look right for Gargoyle-running away from

#monsterdon

And over here, we have the skull of my last house guest. #monsterdon

Nothing says "family vacation" like a creepy old man's basement of nightmares. #monsterdon

#monsterdon

well I'm supposed to teach. mostly I just bang coeds

#monsterdon

#Monsterdon
Old Man: My time Is valuable!
Also Old Man: Let's sit and chat a while.

@jmelesky like the prairies of california #littlehouseontheprairie #monsterdon

btw, daddio is a cool intellectual of demons 👹 🚨

#monsterdon

That was a lot of signs to build up anticipation. Hopefully this place lives up to its now epic reputation. #Monsterdon

#monsterdon MONSTER FLAPS

Manos without the singer

#monsterdon

They're going to turn around and go past the family in the Manos Hands of Fate car going the other way.

#Monsterdon

Uh…. Did anyone notice something in the back seat…. Getting scary already. #Monsterdon

My book's going ok, I've decided to call it 5000 Years of Demonology. Did I say book? I meant prog rock album

#Monsterdon

our demonologist is like a thrift-store harvey korman isn't he

#monsterdon #gargoyles1972

and the award for Longest Station Wagon goes to... #Monsterdon

Lol, this guy is a full blown Graham Hancock crank, isn't he?

#monsterdon

It's Science, but it sells my books

#monsterdon

never mind, i hit the mute button without noticing it.

#monsterdon

#monsterdon The devil, aka Beavis' dad. And a narrator who had been kept on ice since the 1950's just for the occasion

"Calamundi" is where the coke is

#monsterdon

Green blood font -- excellent 🙂

#Monsterdon

I am just opening and closing my mouth over here. Usually it takes at least 20 min to get to something as paralyzingly weird as that opening, but this movie is starting strong.

#Monsterdon

x man vs. nature
x man vs. man
x man vs. society
x man vs. self
⭐ man vs. gargoyle #monsterdon

I miss old school airport security

#monsterdon

@th0tleader slimegoyles?

#Monsterdon

Goosebumps font choice #monsterdon

Producer:
"let's use Green Goo Sans for the opening crredits"

#monsterdon

Loving the font. Where can I get some oozy goodness.

#Monsterdon

reasonable theology

reasonable theology

reasonable theology

well okay that's fic but it'll do

okay now _what_ now

#monsterdon #gargoyles1972

Gargoyles starts with Satan in the outer reaches of Hell instead of the center, apparently.

#Monsterdon #Gargoyles1972

narrator: THE DEVIL!

okay, good start

#monsterdon

Oh my god, this movie ALSO leads with "Since the beginning of time..."

#Monsterdon

@liferstate @moira octaman i think is similar levels of "what the fuck is this" but where this had a sort of "things sorta work" vibe to it octaman feels like "nothing in this works ever" and has one of the best last 10 minutes in a movie i know if #monsterdon

@CactuarJoe @blogdiva
Yeah, it really doesn't pay to get invested in anything remotely resembling narrative with these.

PROPOSAL: Watch every single #Monsterdon Wizard of Oz style: muted with Dark Side of the Moon playing

@ranjit @Louisa Lotsa dirtbikes jumping irrigation canals, not nearly enough cop cars trying & failing to make the jump a la Dukes of Hazzard

#monsterdon

The best parts of Gargoyles (1972) were largely in the beginning. For instance, I liked the part where the dad used a recording of his daughter screaming in fear as an alarm clock to wake her up, and then acted like it didn't occur to him it would have that effect #monsterdon

@moira @peltast Yes, I think it may have just slipped past. Unfortunately I wasn't paying close attention at the precise moment #monsterdon

I wish this movie was better. I think it would have worked as a novella. But it just feels like it was trying to be a tv pilot for a show that would have been even more disappointing.
#Monsterdon #Gargoyles #Gargoyles1972

@apLundell @moira @Louisa Major Arcana cosplay #monsterdon

@liferstate @lytta @jonny I asked if it was, mostly because I've read that a lot of 70s TV movies were pilots that didn't get picked up

#monsterdon #gargoyles1972

@th0tleader @aprilfollies My guess is she has had to endure one too many pontifications on the ways of the local "indians" and couldn't take it any more #monsterdon

@lytta @jonny I... I don't think that makes any more sense.

Though if the TV show starred Gargoyle King, with the townsfolk as antagonists or uneasy allies, I guess it could work?

#Monsterdon

@brucetheknife @Louisa Knew _exactly_ where it was. _Exactly_.

#monsterdon #gargoyles1972

Oh hell yeah. Stan Winston. Nice early work dude.
#Monsterdon #Gargoyles #Gargoyles1972

ROCK WALKER
... the real star.
#Monsterdon #Gargoyles #Gargoyles1972

@Louisa and what felt like half an hour of dirt bike chases

#monsterdon

... our "hero"?
and the rest~
#Monsterdon #Gargoyles #Gargoyles1972

Ah yes, drop-frame slow motion, my favorite kind of drawn-out action sequence #monsterdon

@berniethewordsmith ...and on second thought, let's not forgot that "your choices" basically amount to calling the cops and hitting the gargoyle with a rock

#Monsterdon

🦖 #Monsterdon Thanx

In the Name of Butt Frog,
Thank you @Taweret for the poll, the alerts and the fun! You have wings!

And thanks to @cheribaker for the Bingo card ("Let's shoot at our problems" 😆)

And thanks to @Louisa for the most excellent merch, that I will indulge in soon. Everyone, check that monsterdon stuff out!

And, as always, the Real Time Film Analysis Squad found every possible problem! Great commentary!

Everyone, Watch your toes tonight!!

#Gargoyles1972

Thanks to @taweret for ... whatever just happened here. We only have ourselves to blame for this, and for whatever we vote for next. Conduct yourselves accordingly.

Be told.

#monsterdon #gargoyles72

@Zerofactorial @lytta @blogdiva Yeah, Blacula landed it. it was solid.

#monsterdon #gargoyles1972

The bikers think they are in a way different movie than they actually are in. That's kinda neat. They are in a basic monster movie, but we are watching something trying to be a little deeper and character driven. Driven by curious gargoyles.
#Monsterdon #Gargoyles #Gargoyles1972